bully boss? is this normal?

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jbug5j
jbug5j Posts: 277 Member
in Chit-Chat
question. how long should an employee go with their boss casually threatening their job before they say something? for example: "well be careful because i CAN fire you" or "(to a customer)that's okay, i can always just fire her" or "even if you had vacation time/sick time if you called in you would still be fired(fired being said in a sing song voice)"
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  • coliema
    coliema Posts: 7,646 Member
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    The first time my boss ever said that to me, I'd walk out. But, that's just me.
  • MaryJane_8810002
    MaryJane_8810002 Posts: 2,082 Member
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    question. how long should an employee go with their boss casually threatening their job before they say something? for example: "well be careful because i CAN fire you" or "(to a customer)that's okay, i can always just fire her" or "even if you had vacation time/sick time if you called in you would still be fired(fired being said in a sing song voice)"

    I would probably keep note of it for a wrongful termination lawsuit, but that is me.
  • BaileyBoo13524
    BaileyBoo13524 Posts: 593 Member
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    I dealt with a bully for a boss for 3 years before I finally quit. Get out of there!
  • blessedmommy5
    blessedmommy5 Posts: 4
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    This certainly classifies as workplace bullying and working in a hostile environment. I would take some time to meet with your Human Resource department and document all communication. You should be documenting your communication at all times and make certain that you are performing your duties 100%. So sorry to hear this is happening to you and anyone else that has experienced this type of behavior as you described. :smile:
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
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    Poor managerial skills to say the least.
    Go to HR, you're justified in your complaint.
  • jbug5j
    jbug5j Posts: 277 Member
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    Poor managerial skills to say the least.
    Go to HR, you're justified in your complaint.

    i work at a Caseys gas station. i know that a lot of people would say leave and find a better job but sadly, where i live, Caseys is one of the better jobs :/ im full time and about to start getting vacation/sick time. that being said... my fiancee said normally one is fired after going to HR with a problem :( so im kind of scared to go to a higher up and report it.

    we just got this new manager last december so its only been a few months... im trying really hard to stick it out but this is one of the big things that concerns me. she has acted this way, and worse, to a few other employees as well
  • Daniloveshockey94
    Daniloveshockey94 Posts: 348 Member
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    I would talk to HR and see if they can do anything!
  • MidwestAngel
    MidwestAngel Posts: 1,897 Member
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    oh-no-you-didnt_zpscdea4d9d.gif
  • andyisandy
    andyisandy Posts: 433 Member
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    document document document! it will protect your *kitten* in case of being fired
  • Manda86
    Manda86 Posts: 1,859 Member
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    tumblr_ls034r0jku1qethke.gif
  • bethygirlie
    bethygirlie Posts: 311 Member
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    Go with a bunch of people to HR. They can't fire everyone!!
  • ashlinmarie
    ashlinmarie Posts: 1,263 Member
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    Definitely document it! I went 2 months constantly thinking I was going to be fired before my boss started liking me. He still was a bully though. It was an awful 9 months, but I had no HR....he owned the place and it was a small bakery/cafe/restaurant!
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
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    Poor managerial skills to say the least.
    Go to HR, you're justified in your complaint.

    i work at a Caseys gas station. i know that a lot of people would say leave and find a better job but sadly, where i live, Caseys is one of the better jobs :/ im full time and about to start getting vacation/sick time. that being said... my fiancee said normally one is fired after going to HR with a problem :( so im kind of scared to go to a higher up and report it.

    we just got this new manager last december so its only been a few months... im trying really hard to stick it out but this is one of the big things that concerns me. she has acted this way, and worse, to a few other employees as well



    I've had a few bully bosses and it's been my experience that once you directly confront them and show them that you're not afraid of them, they back off.
    Ask for specific feedback about your job performance.
    Just last year, I had a boss riding my butt and picking apart my work (she does it to everyone) and I had been a nurse for 24 years.
    I took her critique and threw it back in her face (nicely, professionally) showing her how I was doing everything exactly how she wanted.
    She backed off and eventually came to appreciate my experience and say good things about me to management.
  • jbug5j
    jbug5j Posts: 277 Member
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    oh-no-you-didnt_zpscdea4d9d.gif

    hahaha!
  • blessedmommy5
    blessedmommy5 Posts: 4
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    Have you expressed to your supervisor that you are not comfortable with the comments? Have others witnessed he/she commenting to you in this manner? Are you the only individual that has had issues with this supervisor? I would see no reason why you should fear speaking to someone above that could assist you with resolving this issue. Any supervisor that threatens your job by saying they will fire you is NEVER within procedures regardless of where you work. I recommend you seek assistance as I mentioned above. If you are not comfortable with that you may be placed in a position to seek employment elsewhere...especially if you allow the threats to continue.

    Wishing you the best!
  • jbug5j
    jbug5j Posts: 277 Member
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    Have you expressed to your supervisor that you are not comfortable with the comments? Have others witnessed he/she commenting to you in this manner? Are you the only individual that has had issues with this supervisor? I would see no reason why you should fear speaking to someone above that could assist you with resolving this issue. Any supervisor that threatens your job by saying they will fire you is NEVER within procedures regardless of where you work. I recommend you seek assistance as I mentioned above. If you are not comfortable with that you may be placed in a position to seek employment elsewhere...especially if you allow the threats to continue.

    Wishing you the best!

    i have heard of her saying similar things to other employees, and someone just yesterday witnessed the "sick day" comment. im a naturally shy and "soft" person and it is hard for me to flat out face someone with a problem i have. it sucks and i am working on it. im scared because i dont want her to lash out and leave me speachless, or because im not used to defending myself it will come out VERY wrong and make the situation worse. im trying to motivate myself into saying something next time she makes a comment like that.
  • MzBug
    MzBug Posts: 2,173 Member
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    I have been through the same thing, only my boss directly told me during an annual review that as soon as he had "reason" he would be terminating me. Do yourself a huge favor....get the comments on video or audio tape! Written documentation did not help me keep my job, but it did get me a wrongful termination judgement. Between another co worker that was also terminated and I, we had enough to go to the company VP and get the entire 3 state district buisness office (DVP, DHR, DLP, 6 LP reps and 4 district managers) terminated. It didn't help either of us get jobs again, but it sure felt good to get the entire goon squad fired.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,583 Member
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    If you work in an "at will" state, they can fire you for just about anything.


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  • dinosnopro
    dinosnopro Posts: 2,179 Member
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    Poor managerial skills to say the least.
    Go to HR, you're justified in your complaint.

    i work at a Caseys gas station. i know that a lot of people would say leave and find a better job but sadly, where i live, Caseys is one of the better jobs :/ im full time and about to start getting vacation/sick time. that being said... my fiancee said normally one is fired after going to HR with a problem :( so im kind of scared to go to a higher up and report it.

    we just got this new manager last december so its only been a few months... im trying really hard to stick it out but this is one of the big things that concerns me. she has acted this way, and worse, to a few other employees as well


    If she is a shift manager, talk to store manager. If she is the store manager go to corporate.
  • jenj1313
    jenj1313 Posts: 898 Member
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    I agree w/ the comment re: getting evidence on video / audio. Just documenting "your perceptions" is not enough.

    If you want to keep the job and try not to confront her, that's fine... find a way to rise above it... have you tried turning it around in a joking way: maybe when she says that (esp to a customer), smile, shrug and say... "awwww, I know she loves me :-)", or "she says that about all her best employees"...

    If joking won't work, play a mind game with yourself to get through it... think up a sensory cue that makes you smile (something that has verbal, visual, tactile, smell, auditory) and run it through your head whenever she says things like that. Sounds silly, but it can actually put you in a better mood.

    Good luck! Your situation sounds bad, but w the economy the way it is, I understand that you may feel that you may feel you have no choice. Work hard, rise above, and maybe you'll be her boss someday ;-)

    Jen

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