Emotional Rollercoaster

wastelander92

In the last 2 years (the time I've switched to a healthier diet, and have been losing weight) I've noticed that I'll start very slowly feeling better about myself and being generally a little happier, having higher self esteem etc, then after a while of feeling good I'll completely crash and have a huge self loathing fit (which puts a huge strain on my fiance). This puts my diet at risk and my body at risk (it's either hitting fatty food or hitting a bottle for me). I have had depression for a long time, and from 13-16 was anorexic, but I don't exactly see how these contribute to it because I'm usually doing good, looking better, and even getting lots of compliments, things that I assume would help those problems.

I would love to hear feedback from other people experiencing this or people that have an idea why or something to help it, I really don't want to bother my fiance anymore (p.s. he is extremely caring and sensitive to my problems, he helps whenever I ask but unfortunately it doesn't seem to help in the long run and I don't want to keep burdening him emotionally) (p.p.s I don't trust compliments, I usually write it off as the person just being nice, which is rude but it's like a knee-jerk reaction)

AuntieMC

Have you discussed this with a doctor? I wonder if there might be some sort of chemical imbalance involved. I have heard that serotonin imbalances can cause or contribute to depression, anorexia, and mood problems. I suspect they contribute to serious over-eating too. There is medication that might help correct such imbalances.

ton40orbust

What are you doing for exercise? I found that going to the gym and lifting weights or doing an eliptical for a little bit (about 30 minutes) when I'm down can really boost my mood. One of my good friends is trying to get me to do yoga with her and she says it really helps her feel better about herself when shes having a bad day. Another thing is keep a notebook with you. when you start feeling down write down whats on your mind and try to pin-point what the problem is so you can attack it better.

awesomek001

I can totally understand this. I've experienced these same cycles, and so does a friend of mine (who lost 120 lbs, but has regressed and gained back 60 of those).

Unfortunately, the answer to this is that you need to dig deep within yourself and figure out what your emotional trigger is. I've come to believe that these crashes come from something hitting the underlying reason that you over ate / ate unhealthy in the first place. A little time with a therapist to discuss wouldn't be out of line (hopefully you're able to do this) - - or find a trusted friend who you can talk it out with. Also, track your feelings as well as what you're eating. I found that TOM mixed with potatoes made me ever so slightly "wacked" (for lack of a better term LOL)

I've been on my journey for 5 years now, and I have found that I crash less, and less hard - - but I still crash. Thankfully I have a couple of amazing friends who are totally there for me when it occurs, and they always help me pull myself up by my boot straps. Your fiance sounds like an amazing guy - and although you're thinking your bothering him / burdening him, he's your support.

A little while back, when I felt a crash coming on, I tried a Gratitude journal. Every day on facebook (or you could do it here on this site), I posted something that I was thankful for. Some days, it was seriously tough to find, but I did it. That might you look at the positive side of things, and realize that compliments really are reflections of your hard work!

Good luck trying to calm the rollercoaster!

wastelander92

Firstly, thanks all

The vitamin thing sounds like a promising answer to at least part of my rollercoaster, I know I don`t get near enough vitamin C without a supplement (I have a fructose intolerance that makes so I can`t eat fruit) and I am really horrible at remembering to take them =(

As for the exercise I (try) to do it 3x a week (its usually more like 2x) and I do 15-30 mins of cardio plus weights. I know for a lot of ppl exercise makes them feel awesome but unfortunately I just feel hot and tired during and afterwords

I can`t afford a doctor or a therapist atm so I think I`m gonna start writing things down even if they sound like insane garbage