nightmarish episodes

Yaxomoxay

What is the worse diet/fitness related “nightmarish thing” you have ever seen that does not involve you?

I have two episodes involving the same kid. This kid at my son’s karate school, about 8 years old, is extremely obese; he probably weighted 200 pounds and was short. One of the nicest kids I have ever met in my life. Sweet, determined, well-educated. He loved to do classes with my son; he even made drawings to show his appreciation of my family. He was relentless. I have never ever seen any other kid trying so hard in martial arts. He did not see his weight as a reason NOT to try.

Episode 1: He does some tryouts to see if he could fit to the Demo team of the school. The black belts, knowing how willful he was and how sweet he was allow him to do the tryout. While he’s doing some of the routines, unfortunately badly performed because of his weight, his dad opens the door and tells to him, in front of everyone “Son, you are fat. Why are you even trying this? You want to get humiliated?”. I don’t know what the kid felt at that moment. But let me tell you (black belts agree with me) that the poor kid was setting a great example for all of us: no excuses. It was actually quite beautiful to see him trying so hard.

Episode 2: Same kid. He does his martial arts class. When he gets out this discussion happened in front of me

Mom (obese): “Let’s go to eat”.

Kid: “Can I just get a frozen yogurt?”

Mom:”No, we’re going at McDonald’s”

Kid:”I don’t want McDonald’s”

Mom: “I said we are going there.”

Kid:”I don’t want their sandwiches, they’re bad”

Mom:”Then you are going to eat double fries. Now hurry up or you’re in trouble. You gotta eat”.

I seriously don’t know how and why I kept my mouth shut.

FYI parents had their kid quit and as far as I am aware – my son goes to school with his sister –he’s not doing any sport nor excercise anymore.

neandermagnon

Can your son invite him round for tea or something? You can feed him healthy foods and encourage him to take up karate again. If your son's going, maybe ask his parents if you can take their son as well as you're going anyway? It's going to take a pretty mean parent to prevent their child doing an activity that they enjoy which they don't even have to take their kid to...?

Also IMO the teachers in the karate class should have said something in response to the dad saying that, e.g. "he's got the best attitude of all of them and is setting a great example. No-one gets good at anything without working hard, and he works the hardest of all and has a ton of potential." (or something like that)

Yaxomoxay

Can your son invite him round for tea or something? You can feed him healthy foods and encourage him to take up karate again. If your son's going, maybe ask his parents if you can take their son as well as you're going anyway? It's going to take a pretty mean parent to prevent their child doing an activity that they enjoy which they don't even have to take their kid to...?

Also IMO the teachers in the karate class should have said something in response to the dad saying that, e.g. "he's got the best attitude of all of them and is setting a great example. No-one gets good at anything without working hard, and he works the hardest of all and has a ton of potential." (or something like that)

Good idea. We'll try to invite him somehow.

Yes, the black belts tried to say something, including making him "Student of the week" several times. They also said no parent should interrupt a class, especially if the students are doing great.
Unfortunately we all knew his dad was against him doing martial arts, so we were all afraid he would have used the "hostility" as an excuse to remove him from the school. It's quite difficult to deal with complete idiotic parents without damaging the kid.

neandermagnon

Can your son invite him round for tea or something? You can feed him healthy foods and encourage him to take up karate again. If your son's going, maybe ask his parents if you can take their son as well as you're going anyway? It's going to take a pretty mean parent to prevent their child doing an activity that they enjoy which they don't even have to take their kid to...?

Also IMO the teachers in the karate class should have said something in response to the dad saying that, e.g. "he's got the best attitude of all of them and is setting a great example. No-one gets good at anything without working hard, and he works the hardest of all and has a ton of potential." (or something like that)

Good idea. We'll try to invite him somehow.

Yes, the black belts tried to say something, including making him "Student of the week" several times. They also said no parent should interrupt a class, especially if the students are doing great.
Unfortunately we all knew his dad was against him doing martial arts, so we were all afraid he would have used the "hostility" as an excuse to remove him from the school. It's quite difficult to deal with complete idiotic parents without damaging the kid.

I get what you mean about that. Some parents are just.... !!!! Unfortunately it sounds like the same kind of negative attitudes that a lot of adults face from family members when they want to improve above their current situation, i.e. coming from insecurity from those who aren't willing or believe they're not able to do the same.... hard enough facing that as an adult, never mind as an 8 yr old kid :frown: Best thing is if you and other people who believe in him can keep that fighter spirit in him alive until he's old enough to go out and do stuff like go to karate classes for himself. With his parents, if their attitude does come from this kind of security, it may be better to focus on how much the son enjoys karate. They must want him to have fun, surely...