Working out with significant other?

mshoneysmile7

My fiance' has always been in shape, and just joined the military. I'm already starting to see his military build. He suggests that I workout with him, but I feel uncomfortable about the thought of us working out together... Insecurities maybe... I guess it's kind of like when the guy/gal that's not so fit goes to the gym for the first time and sees all these people with nice bodies... You feel uncomfortable working out... Does anyone else feel uncomfortable about working out with their significant other? :ohwell:

ebuchanan81

I do also. I won't work out in front of him. I go will go downstairs to the basement and he stays up.

JustJennie1

Nope.

I go to the gym with my husband and I have no problem doing my aerobics at home. Sure he'll stand in the doorway and imitate me and laugh at my flailing around (who wouldn't?!) but that stops quick when I tell him to get his butt in the room and do it with me because I know he can't LOL.

Don't be intimidated by the people at the gym because believe it or not they're NOT all fit. I think it's great that your SO wants you to go to the gym with him.

mshoneysmile7

Nope.

I go to the gym with my husband and I have no problem doing my aerobics at home. Sure he'll stand in the doorway and imitate me and laugh at my flailing around (who wouldn't?!) but that stops quick when I tell him to get his butt in the room and do it with me because I know he can't LOL.

Don't be intimidated by the people at the gym because believe it or not they're NOT all fit. I think it's great that your SO wants you to go to the gym with him.

UGH! I know!!! He even says "Wanna come running with me?" I'm like "No, but that you". I know he genuinely wants to help me to achieve my goals and will support me, ESPECIALLY if it involves my health... But I am just too insecure about what I will look like to him when I'm working out... Will he be disappointed or bothered by the fact that I can't keep up... I know the answers to those questions in my own heart(He actually told me he thinks it's hot that I wanna workout now... ), but my insecurities are messing with me.

Erienneb

I will go to the gym with my boyfriend for cardio days because it doesn't matter that I can't keep up. I don't lift with him because I do with my best friend. When the weather warms up he likes to run outside but I can't keep up so I don't know. He is, however, incredibly patient and motivating, and will even go to the gym twice in one day if he went for himself but I need the extra push to go later. He did that last night and did the stair climber with me, after having already been there to lift with his brother.

csuhar

You could, as mentioned, work out in a separate area. Part of how my family kept ourselves consistent was going to the YMCA at the same time, even though my mom would be swimming, my dad would be on the treadmills and I'd be on the machines. At the very least, that could reduce any feelings of having to compete with the gym for your S.O.'s time.

The "just joined the military" aspect could have different effects depending on what you mean specifically. If he's just signed up, I can't say much about what that does for his approach. If, however, he's gone through training, then he's probably seen these three lessons:

1) Everybody's different. You will all have different strengths and weaknesses.
2) Sometimes your strong areas that are easy for you are areas where other people have problems. Similarly, your weak areas will be someone else's strengths.
3) The only way to move forward is to work together, coach each other through our weak areas, and encourage your teammates.

So, if he's gone through basic training, then he may actually be BETTER suited to help you because he will already have had to deal with people not at the same level that he is.

aecole87

Completely know where you are coming from. My boyfriend is in really great shape and competes in triathlons and is doing a half-Ironman this year. I am just now getting back into running and the gym after a long hiatus. At first I didn't want to run or go to the gym with him because I know he is so much better than me at everything and it made me feel like he would think I was a loser. Ha. Silly but true. I finally just got over myself and now I've found that he loves when we can go run together even though I am as slow as Christmas. lol. I think it's more that he wants to spend time together and not necessarily that he expects you to keep up which is really sweet! My boyfriend actually enjoys that I am just getting back into working out because he loves to give me advice and I love hearing it from him. He knows what he is talking about and he is such a great tool to use in my training. It's a fun thing to do together. Just enjoy it and quit worrying! Women usually judge themselves way tougher than their boyfriend or any man for that matter!

carriempls

Yikes.
I'm thankful I don't feel that way at all.

My bf and I used to go to the gym together. Neither of us us in awesome shape, though he's definitely in better shape than I am. We'd swap in and out on weight machines and do the ellipticals next to each other. After several months of dating we joined the same gym and we spent many of our weeknight "dates" doing just that.

We now have different routines so we don't do it so much anymore but I actually kinda miss it.

amandat_79

I started out going to the gym and I was a little nervous at first because he's in good shape and I was completely out of shape but he was super supportive!! We still go to the gym 2 to 3 days a week but I also run and lift and home while he sits and plays video games haha - I have begun to enjoy it and now we have one more thing we can do together.

_chiaroscuro

I actually love working out with my husband; wish we could do so more often. Usually we have to take turns while one of us is with our daughter. But we've been together eleventybillion years so there's no mystery anymore (even when there should be, ha). Why not give it a try but be honest about feeling a little self-conscious? He'll probably end up being a great cheerleader for you.

nora711

I'm doing the 30 day shred with my fiance.
The only problem is that I yell at him if he talks to me during :P.

IzzyBooNZ1

nope
My partner and I have just joined a Thai Boxing gym together and we go on walks together as well. I do my own seperate workouts.

boccivc

I'm doing the 30 Day Shred and tonight my husband joined me for the first time. He is in much better shape than me, but nevertheless he was sweating hard too. He uses harder weights and does all the advanced moves so it was hard for him too.
It was actually really fun to do this together!

sovannac

Not at all. My boyfriend and I workout together all the time. We aren't in the greatest shape so we're committed to living better lifestyles. We've started cooking together and going to the gym together. He's my spotter and motivates me to work harder. Sometimes he's afraid he's not pushing me hard enough because he knows I get frustrated easily but he's very supportive. He's not very big on cardio so he'll walk on the treadmill next to me while I run. If I decide to do a workout at home like Insanity, he'll sit on the couch out of my way but continue to encourage me when I get tired.

AceOfSpada

Ive gone to the gym with my boyfriend and he is in far better shape than I am. We all have insecurities on different levels and he can be a helpful tool for you in learning to cope with any insecurities. I suggest talking to him to let him know what you need from him through this new process you are going through. Let him know what will push you to go further...but also let him know what would make you uneasy. He is a part of your life and I have personally found that having the one you love share your ups and down and even insecurities helps you through the weight loss process. Best of luck to you!

wigglypeaches

My boyfriend and I met at the gym, and still enjoy going together. It can be nice to share the experience/schadenfreude/misery with someone else. And it can help to have someone who supports you there to push you through.