Insanity - The Legends of Tania

BigDougie1211

Inspired by a previous thread....

I actually read an article that said Tania had made a deal with the Devil.
She sold her soul in return for superhuman levels of physical fitness.
When it came to collection time she was dragged to the Underworld and sentenced to perform barefoot switch-kicks on a lego strewn floor for all eternity!
But as she was in such great shape, she was able to battle her way out of Hell. Switch kicking Demons and despatching Hell Hounds with a succession of power knees. She finally Power Jumped over the lake of fire and made it back to our World.
But she wasn't able to break the contract, which still stands and the Devil got his payment.
That's why Tania has no shadow and no soul!

Any other good Tania stories?

BigDougie1211

I heard that when Tania was 3 years old, for reasons unclear, her family was destroyed by a creature from another dimension. She was only spared due to the villain's arrogance, refusing to acknowledge that 3 year old girl could ever be threat to it. She was found crying in a wardrobe when the police came to invstigate and was raised by a kindly old beat cop / vietnam vet. He taught her the basics of self defence and warfare. When she was 15 she moved to China where, having proven her worthiness, she was accepted to study anicent mystical arts of combat under the tutelage of an old chinese man with a long white beard and ponytail. She is now the most dangerous woman on the planet and hopes that by becoming a biological perpetual motion machine she can generate enough energy to re-open the dimensional gateway between the creatures world and our's, in order to confront the thing that made her.
That's why Tania can't be still for a second - EVER.

spamantha57

I'm guessing this is the Asian chick in the videos that seems way too happy to be jumping up & down for 40 minutes?

BigDougie1211

That's her, except sometimes she realizes the camera is on her and she puts on a " pained " face.

BigDougie1211

A friend of mine ( who worked on Jurassic Park ) told me that Tania is actually CGI'd to be presented as the peak of humanity. She cost $35,000,000.00 to render. That's why the " camera " always focusses on her. Otherwise it would have been a waste of money.

BigDougie1211

2013 is the Chinese year of the Tania.