Slim down sadness.

Victœria

Hello guys & girls.

I lost 45lbs last year. Although now it's only a 33lb loss.

When people gave me compliments I didn't accept them simply stating "I shouldn't have gotten like that in the 1st place. I am still disappointed in myself"

I had a good couple of months where I felt reasonably happy and now I have crashed into a serious depression.

I'm having a real hard time with binge eating.

I am pushing people away and segregating myself from friends,family and colleagues.

Sometimes I think about not eating at all.

I stay in bed for as long as I can, avoiding social events.

I feel lonely, fat, miserable... Nobody wants to be around me anymore because I'm so hard to be around.

I never smile, I never laugh. It's like I've forgotten how to be happy.

I never used to feel this way when I was fatter. Maybe I should get fat again.. I don't know.. I'm at the bottom of a pit and I can't get out.

jenlarz

sounds like depression. Do you live somewhere cold? could be something like SAD. Don't be afraid to reach out for help!

Emmalindley

Hi Victoria,

Sorry to hear you are feeling low, I have felt that way too and I let is go on for 3 years before I got help. Have you been to your doctor? I was lucky to have one that really listened, although it took going back every day for a week before I actually managed to explain how I was feeling.

If you prefer not to go to the doctor, maybe try walking every day? Even if its a short walk, getting out in the fresh air really makes a difference.

I pushed my friends away too but I'm sure they still want to see you and that they miss you not going out to social events. Try saying yes to the next one you are invited too and get yourself back out there!

You have lost 33lbs that is amazing! Look back at an older photo and see the difference for yourself and be proud! I would love to lose that much!

Take care, Emma

jenniferrusso7393

You definitely sound depressed... I would seriously recommend seeing a dr-- its no fun feeling depressed-- you should be enjoying the slimmer you! Be proud of your success!

SherryR1971

At first glance, I would agree with Jen, because I have the same issue. I had a bad January (gained 7 pounds back!! :sad: ) and have decided Feb. is going to be different. Let us know what we can do to help you!!

Pixi_Rex

Go see a doctor.

SquishyVicki

Hi

I am so sorry that you seem to feel that way but I don't think weight is a factor here as this seems emotional rather than a physical illness therefore as getting thinner / fatter will not make you feel better. As the other posters have mentioned; get out and about and speak to someone like a doctor that should be able to help.

Good luck and I hope you feel better soon xx

now_or_never13

Looks bad at pictures of where you were and than look at some from now to show your progress.

33lbs is an amazing accomplishment! Don't think otherwise. Do not beat yourself up saying you shouldnt' of let it get to that. You have come a long way and you need to look at and celebrate the hard work you have done.

I agree with the poster who asked if you lived somewhere cold. It could be SAD. I used to get like that when I was living in a basement apartment. There was pretty much no natural light in the apartment and even when there was I was always at work for it. I would go to work and it was dark out... stay inside work all day where there are no windows and I would very rarely go outside... when I left work it would be dark out as well. I was feeling downt throughout that time because of the lack of natural light. SAD is something that is very common.

Is there anyone you will speak with? A doctor? A really good friend? A spouse or family member? Take charge of things now so they don't get worse. You have said it is a serious depression... please get help. Getting help is not admitting defeat... it is taking charge of yourself and your health.

Zicon

Go see a doctor.

And if your doctor tells you to "think happy thoughts" or "perk up" or anything similar, see a different doctor. Depression is a serious issue and must be handled as such.

Until then, keep this in mind: Your brain is lying to you. Don't listen to it. You need and deserve help, and the sooner you get it the better.

Juliejustsaying

Depression...you need to see your doctor to rule out things like hypothyroidism and anemia...all things that effect me. Also if you live in a cold climate try a tanning subscription..you don't need to get dark, but the warm light does wonders for me when I've done it in the past.

If your dr rules out any other medical causes, he could put you on an anti-depressant, I'm not a huge fan of medication, but sometimes you need it to get through a rough spot.

My point is, do something! You deserve to feel good about yourself and life. Don't let it stop you from being pro-active towards better days.

Hmmcglothl

If you're like me, then you turn to food when your emotions are out of control. When you weren't eating healthy and were heavier, you had free reign to do that! Now that you've lost weight and are watching what you eat, you can't turn to food when you're down. I struggled with this at first because I felt like I had no where to find my comfort. Then I started exercising when I wanted to binge eat. At first it was soooo terribleand I hated it. After the workout was over though, I felt so much better about myself.

You do sound like you're struggling with depression. You need to get help right away sweetheart. The longer you let yourself slide down into the dumps the longer it takes to climb back up that mountain of sadness and isolation. It sounds like you could maybe benefit from finding an outside support group that meets every week or so.. This will give you something to look forward to, people to talk with who don't live with you and a reason to get out of the house. These are the things that help me when I tend to isolate myself from the world.

Take care! You DESERVE to be living a healthy AND happy life. Don't waste time and get help quickly!

TinaDay1114

Victoria,
I'm sorry you're feeling so lost right now. I've been there a few times myself, and it's agonizing. After trying to pull myself out over and over again (I used to think I could THINK my way out of it, figure it out, do things, try something new, etc. etc.) I finally got to a good therapist and realized I just had a lot inside I needed to work out, and I couldn't do that alone. A good dr., a good anti-depressant for a while, and you will find a way back to yourself, and way back to happy. Whatever it is that's getting to you, you'll at least be able to find it, put your finger on it, and do something about it for yourself (instead of feeling helpless, like I did for so long.)

And don't feel bad about being in that place, or needing help getting out -- if you had an injury and wanted to see a doc, no one would blame you. It's just some internal healing you need.

Know that you're not alone, and this is not forever. ((HUGS))

Hang in there.

darlilama

GO SEE A DOCTOR! If they don't help or don't seem serious about it or don't recommend it, then see a therapist, too. Sometimes it just takes a shove in the right direction, sometimes more. You have an awareness about your problem. That's the first, big, step. Some people go on forever without realizing their situation.

This could be something like SAD, or it could be a thyroid issue (I have one niece who is just horrible and a mess when she's not taking her thyroid meds) or who knows what, but it's SOMETHING.

Please, please take positive action about this. You deserve to be happy, whether you are thin or not. But, really, do you want to sacrifice your health for "happiness", which I think might be some facsimile of real happiness?

Good luck. Let us know how it goes. Wishing you the absolute best. :flowerforyou:

Sheacat

Go see a doctor.

And if your doctor tells you to "think happy thoughts" or "perk up" or anything similar, see a different doctor. Depression is a serious issue and must be handled as such.

Until then, keep this in mind: Your brain is lying to you. Don't listen to it. You need and deserve help, and the sooner you get it the better.

^^^^^^ X's 1000.

20kb13

I would definitely see a Dr about it and if it's somewhere cold I always feel more depressed in the winter months. You should be proud of your weight loss, able to look back at those pictures and know that you never want to be that way again... enjoy the new you. Definitely see a Dr and I know they have weight loss counseling too.... some people find it emotional losing weight or dealing with what really caused them to gain it to begin with. A girl I went to high school with saw a nutritionist and counselor while losing weight... the counseling part really helped her out to figure out why she gained weight to begin with, to help teach new ways of dealing with stress, and to learn to love the new person she was becoming. I never knew that type of counseling was available before but it's great to know it's out there.

MILFaspirations

i think you are amazingly beautiful!

Pet03

One thing that may be causing this is possibly your hormone levels. If you can have them tested to see if they are in the normal ranges. Sometimes with changes in your diet and exercise it can cause an imbalance in hormones which may also cause these effects. Also get as much sunlight as possible and add vitamins to your diet if you do not take them already. I hope this helps and I hope you feel better soon. I have been through depression and it is not a fun thing. I have also seen my mother go through it as well. It is not pretty but check all avenues to ensure before it gets worse.

Crankstr

Go see a doctor.

please do...i dont think this has anything to do with your size... there is help out there...i hope you are better soon.

apriltrainer

I felt this way after I WON a fitness transformation contest. I was able to fit not just into a bikini..but a tiny one and got on a calendar! I looked great..

It was hard work getting there...and then I got there and the bottom fell out. I wasn't Happy! I still wasn't happy.

I am learning that a smaller size doesn't mean happiness and maintaining weight as opposed to losing it...can be hard, if not harder.

I also have problems with binging and so far have been clean of binges for a couple of months. I still need external motivators. I wish I could have internal ones but I still need the outside motivators. And instead of feeling bad about that...I will use them and hopefully work on the internal ones.

Until then..just know you aren't alone. I am on antidepressants. There is NO shame in that. No shame at all. It's given me my life back.

jkrim941

I have anxiety and depression. I push people away A LOT. I recently started seeing an amazing therapist and it has made a world of difference. (I was always too proud to do it before.)

I was on an antidepressant once for 2 weeks and it made me slow. I mean ssssllllloooooowwww. I would start things and not finish them- just walk away and forget I was doing them. My speech was really long and drawn out, too. I decided I couldn't work and take the medication so we stopped it. (My sister takes anxiety meds and she seems to do just fine. Just goes to show everyone is different!) I started meditating to calm my anxiety. It's easier said than done. I found an app for my iPhone that I don't know how I ever lived without it. It's called "take a break" and it is short (7-18mins) guided deep breathing meditation.

Go see your doctor. Get recommendations and/or referrals for therapy. You are worth every effort. Put it in when you can. I promise there are people out there that care about you and want you to feel good and enjoy your life. My friends have told me that they felt helpless and didn't know what to do. When I go through the anxiety/depression, I know I am not able to correctly articulate what I need or how I am really feeling. It sounds like you know yourself really well. You can identify your feelings. That's also a huge step towards working this out.

If you want to add me, feel free. I can share my experiences with you and listen. You're a good person. You care about yourself and others. Remember that.

kellster111

As lots of other people have said you sound like you are depressed. I was in a similar situation to you 4 months ago, I had hit my target weight, was enjoying exercising, ran a half marathon and should have felt on top of the world, but I didn't. I wasn't sleeping, wasn't eating proper;y and when I did it was binging, I cried for hours for no reason, was snappy and I hated myself. I went to see my GP who talked through how I felt and prescribed me anti depressants, after a few weeks I started to feel so much better and now I feel great, fit and healthy and ready for a new challenge.

Medication may not be for everyone but it is worth looking into, depression can be caused by hormone inbalance and one of the ways to treat is medication.

I hope you feel better soon, feel free to inbox me if you want to chat.