Scared....................

squindles

Hi everyone. This what I'm going to post seems really stupid but I've dieted all my life and NOTHING has ever worked long term for me. The most I've ever lost in one go is 17lbs. I'm slowly changing my eating habits, I'm not eleminating ANYTHING, carbs, fat etc and at my weigh in this morning I've hit my 1st 14lbs! Now, don't get me wrong, I'm totally made up but on the other hand and this is the stupid bit I'm scared!!! But scared of what? I think part of me knows that I've always failed in the past and I've got a nagging voice in my head telling me that I've failed before so this time it won't be any different (that sounds really weird sorry!!) but I feel scared as well of succeeding and finally getting rid of this horrible body of extreeme fat???????.........Does it make sense to anyone, because it sure doesn't to me!!!!
ps I've posted this else where on the forums but have posted it here as well in the hope that someone who's already lost a vast amount of weight can help....thanks

jenilla1

Tell yourself the truth: you failed in the past because you were dieting. Dieting is usually a temporary fix, and often is too restrictive, setting you up for failure. This time you will succeed because you will be making a permanent lifestyle change and you are going to take your time doing it the healthy way. Don't be too restrictive. The changes you make have to be something you can live with in order to be sustainable. Make small changes at first and as you achieve small victories make more changes and set more goals. You got this! :drinker:

uwdawg07

This isn't the past, and you aren't going to repeat your mistakes. You will keep going, losing weight, eating healthy, and you will reap the rewards!! Be proud of what you've accomplished and become excited for what the future holds.

You're doing great and will continue to do great!

carolyn0613

I think that the little changes add up to a big difference. After all, the weight that we put on tends to be those little bits of overeating - puddings with ice cream, crisps and chips, alcohol, big portions, snacking in the evenings etc. So if we change little things, then that weight that crept on will creep off again.

it's also good to think about the ease with which this stone has come off - you are not struggling with a 'diet', you are not fighting with food. So if you reframe it and think that it will be easy to keep up these little changes, then you won't fail.

There's also the strategy of little goals so that if you don't meet one of your little goals, the next one comes along soon enough which you can meet. I think of it like a journey - if you stop for a rest, that's OK. or you go back a few steps, as long as you keep your next goal in sight.

One of the hardest things is to let go of the image of yourself at the weight you were. If you lose weight and change dramatically, will that change you as a person? Will you be the same inside but others treat you differently? Will you lose an element of yourself that you like and don't want to let go of? Is there a part of you that is hiding behind the weight? These are all scary thoughts! But I suppose, it's a that old cliché, can we learn to love ourselves, because changing the outside won't change who we are or how we feel about ourselves deep down.

krissy_krossy

This isn't destined to be a repeat of the past. You can't change the past, but you have control over your present and (to some extent) future. So you're scared. There are two ways to deal with it. Either you can live in fear and eventually resign yourself to the idea that you will fail again, or you can decide that this time will be the time it sticks and you change your lifestyle for good. You may slip up, everyone does once in a while, but then you decide to "get back on the horse" and keep going.
Perhaps you ARE scared of losing the weight. I mean, if you've been overweight for a long time then it will be something new. People generally get nervous about change. But you have to remind yourself that it's a GOOD change. If the idea of losing weight really makes you uneasy sometimes, just tell yourself that you're eating better and exercising purely for your health. The weight loss is just a side-effect.
And don't think of it as "dieting." Dieting isn't sustainable forever. Work towards adopting a healthier lifestyle. The mindset you have towards this can really set the tone for you.
If all else fails, try try again. You should never be so scared of failing that you give up on your health.

squindles

Thanks everybody for your advice. I feel much better now
Jackie xx

hiyomi

I always see dieting as a little too easy, if you want real results you need to exercise its hard but worth it

amoslionhorse

to answer your question, yes, you're normal.. and i've felt the same, and that feeling nags back every now and then. I've lost 100 lbs before, 80 lbs, 75, 50 lbs a couple times.. and gained it back each time, and then some. So I know failure too.

This time I think I've finally found the right mix of eating well, in a sustainable way, and found regular exercise routines that work for me, and will work for life.. things I really enjoy, and will actually do. I go to Aquafit 3x a week, and just got Biggest Loser workout, plus I enjoy long walks (...in the park, i want to say, then it sounds like a personal ad. LOL)

cityjaneLondon

Yes, I am scared too. I have lost 34 lbs so far and have more to go. This is the most I have ever lost at one time. I want to go out and buy new trousers. I am scared. I used to hate clothes shopping- - exhausting, frustrating, depressing. I don't know how to do this. All my friends that I would like to go with are now bigger than me and I don't want to appear as if I am crowing so I wont ask them. I normally buy clothes on line so I don't have to go out, but I think jeans you have to try on.
It now takes me about 12 days to lose a pound. It can be a bit depressing, but then when I do lose it I feel so good! I get a new lease of life then. I eat lovely food and only feel hungry mid afternoon when I have a small snack. You have to think of it as a lifetime thing. Something you can live with for ever. Learn to cook really well. You can eat great food. I do. It is worth it, but your life will change . You will not be the same person. Relationships will change. Friendships even. Love yourself.