Self conscious with a new guy?

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Replies

  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,303 Member
    has anyone mentioned blindfolds yet. may work great with a pair of handcuffs.
  • lovelyMYlovely
    lovelyMYlovely Posts: 1,066 Member
    listen... is guy iked u for u... how u are now.. he didnt know how u were... so dont feel insecure... because what he sees is what he likes :)
  • needles85365
    needles85365 Posts: 491 Member
    You need to work on YOUR insecurity. If you are not happy and confident in yourself then you will feel like no one can care/love you. The person you get involved in isn't looking at your weight, if they were they wouldn't be around. Body image is in your head, you can be confident and beautiful at any size. Talk to your new guy if he's worth hanging around he'll help.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Nope. In my experience, guys haven't cared -- this is true of relationships, booty calls, and one night stands. You are likely far more critical of yourself than any guy is going to be. Just be confident in yourself and you're gold.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
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  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Nope. In my experience, guys haven't cared -- this is true of relationships, booty calls, and one night stands. You are likely far more critical of yourself than any guy is going to be. Just be confident in yourself and you're gold.
    ...en

    Sorry, had to do it. It was driving me insane.


    :laugh:
  • rugbyphreak
    rugbyphreak Posts: 509 Member
    I was self conscious on the first two "real" dates. I got really dressed up, sucked in my stomach, put on a smile the entire time, etc. By the time I went over to his place for our third date, I was pretty comfortable. I'm not perfect. He's not perfect. He doesn't expect some beauty queen under these jeans. Let's just say that I'm glad I allowed myself to calm down and open up. The night ended amazingly. :love: :blushing:
  • VorJoshigan
    VorJoshigan Posts: 1,106 Member
    eh... I think men are smarter than you give us credit for. If you're overweight, we know. We know that some clothes look or feel better when you have extra weight. If you've been on 5 dates, he doesn't think your weight is a problem.

    Don't get me wrong - we can be real dumb sometimes, but I doubt you're fooling him.
  • iorahkwano
    iorahkwano Posts: 709 Member
    I'm a virgin so I'm probably not much help, but I'd like to try. In my experience with making out with people, vertically or horizontally, often times the lights are off or dim... I know that when I'm with a guy, I'm focused more on the kissing than wondering what he looks like. I don't even wonder if he has a fat roll or search for one. I don't try to look at his stomach. Not because I'm avoiding it but I just don't really think to do it. I'm more focused on if the making out is good, or if there's anything cool I can think of to do! He's probably going to be the same way, he's probably nervous too for his own reasons.

    When I really like someone, I don't care whether they have a belly or not. I like them for their personality and their facial features. If this guy is attracted to you how you are now, chances are he's been with girls around your size before and has an idea what is under the clothes anyway. Some guys prefer the larger ladies! I had a lot of guy friends and when we got on these topics, they seemed to prefer girls with big thighs/butts and a bit of a belly. They didn't like the hipbones or stick legs.
  • RandiLandCHANGED
    RandiLandCHANGED Posts: 630 Member
    eh... I think men are smarter than you give us credit for. If you're overweight, we know. We know that some clothes look or feel better when you have extra weight. If you've been on 5 dates, he doesn't think your weight is a problem.

    Don't get me wrong - we can be real dumb sometimes, but I doubt you're fooling him.

    This. I don't think he's going to see you naked and be shocked. Be confident :)

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