Beat a dead horse thread.

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  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I want to go paleo but woolly rhino and woolly mammoths are extinct. Should I eat regular rhinos and elephants instead?

    What about human flesh? Should I inform my older relatives that after they die I'll probably eat them, because that's what cavemen did?
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I'm eating 300 calories a day and working out in the gym for 6 hours a day and I'm still not losing weight. :sad: I also keep on passing out. What can I eat that will give me more energy but doesn't contain any calories?
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I just can't seem to eat 1,200 calories. What should I do?

    just eat however little you feel comfortable with and don't let the eat more police arrest you. This forum is full of bullies who think it's okay to go around giving people advice that might help them succeed without torturing themselves in the process, because they're mean bullies. Only listen to people who will pat you on the head and tell you that you're doing fine just fine and anyone who doesn't do this is a bully.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I seem to gain muscle really easily. I lifted weights in the gym twice last week and all of my muscles grew overnight and now they look bulky. I'm eating 1200 calories a day and doing 2 hrs cardio a day. I don't want to look bulky :sad: should I quit lifting weights or just stick to the little pink ones in the future?
  • P05T5CRIPT
    P05T5CRIPT Posts: 285 Member
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    beatingadeadhorsecallme.jpg \m/

    This made my day.....love this thread!
  • Smallbluepebble
    Smallbluepebble Posts: 49 Member
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    I weighed myself and lost 2lb but then an hour later I did poop so I thought I should weigh myself again and I put on 3lb...!!!

    Why is this happening to me??? :sad: :sad: :sad:
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I weighed myself and lost 2lb but then an hour later I did poop so I thought I should weigh myself again and I put on 3lb...!!!

    Why is this happening to me??? :sad: :sad: :sad:

    because you're eating food that's made of negative mass matter. this is not a good idea. It'll make you lighter on the scale, but not because you're less fat, just because some of the fat you've stored is being repelled by the Earth's gravitational field, rather than attracted to it.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    I've lost a pound. Can you see the difference in my pics?

    GREAT JOB! Keep up the good work. Can you tell me exactly what you did and how you did it in excruciating detail so I can do exactly the same things so I can get the same results without having to think about it at all?
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
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    I've lost a pound. Can you see the difference in my pics?

    GREAT JOB! Keep up the good work. Can you tell me exactly what you did and how you did it in excruciating detail so I can do exactly the same things so I can get the same results without having to think about it at all?

    No problem! I kept meticulous records on an excel spreadsheet and weighed myself daily. It took me a year, but hey, it's still progress. Right? RIGHT? I've been following the diet of eating more to lose weight and I decided to start with 5000 calories a day. I figured I would go down to 4800 next year and train my body to exist on less.
  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
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    I just started counting calories, I have eaten clean all day, why did I gain weight?

    Plateau Help!

    People say I need to eat cause I only eat 500 calories and exercise 800 calories, but I am not hungry.. do I need to eat?

    People look at me at the gym, am I fat or is it cause I wear my stripper outfit on the elliptical?
  • SyntonicGarden
    SyntonicGarden Posts: 944 Member
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    I want to jump start my diet with a dog food fast. It's a very scientific concept. You eat nothing but 1 tin of dog food every day for a week. The dog food provides you with protein, healthy fat, vitamins, minerals and marrow-bone jelly. It also gives you bright eyes, a wet nose and a glossy coat. The only other thing you're allowed to drink is water. You can add lemon juice and/or chilli to the water if you don't like the taste of water or if you want to get rid of the taste of the dog food.

    My friend tried this and she lost 8 pounds in one week. Now I want to try it. What brand of dog food tastes the best?


    You'll have more success with the cayenne-maple syrup - lemon juice fast. I lost 30 lbs in 10 minutes.

    (Heh. Dog kibble and cat food are in the tracker.)
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
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    You'll have more success with the cayenne-maple syrup - lemon juice fast. I lost 30 lbs in 10 minutes.


    ah, memories...
  • stresco
    stresco Posts: 354 Member
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    Don't bother to send me a Friend Request if you don't include a message.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    Don't bother to send me a Friend Request if you don't include a message.

    Absolutely.

    I'd much rather try to figure out if they might be a decent addition to my FL based on their cryptic user name and/or their one public pic (assuming they aren't a blue person) on an otherwise fully locked down profile. Including a message of why they think it might make sense to be friends would take all the fun out of it.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I want to jump start my diet with a dog food fast. It's a very scientific concept. You eat nothing but 1 tin of dog food every day for a week. The dog food provides you with protein, healthy fat, vitamins, minerals and marrow-bone jelly. It also gives you bright eyes, a wet nose and a glossy coat. The only other thing you're allowed to drink is water. You can add lemon juice and/or chilli to the water if you don't like the taste of water or if you want to get rid of the taste of the dog food.

    My friend tried this and she lost 8 pounds in one week. Now I want to try it. What brand of dog food tastes the best?


    You'll have more success with the cayenne-maple syrup - lemon juice fast. I lost 30 lbs in 10 minutes.

    (Heh. Dog kibble and cat food are in the tracker.)

    Marie Antoinette lost 10lb in about 3 seconds on the guillotine diet. I really must try that.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
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    210/220 whatever it takes!!!!

    BAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA! Love it!

    Even though it's "220/221 whatever it takes" still a classic
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
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    You all stop!

    They can't put anything on the internet that isn't true....

    Lol BONJOUR!!!
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    When the ice melts in my drink can I count that towards my water goal?
  • ROSIEH65
    ROSIEH65 Posts: 20 Member
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    HUNTERS CAN WEAR LEATHER AND USE STRENGTH!
    tumblr_m0dpevTRh31rqfhi2o1_400.gif




    not bothered by the thread, but THIS ^ is hilarious !!!!!!!!!!
  • foxro
    foxro Posts: 793 Member
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    You won't bulk up using the pink 10 pound plates as you will using the regular 10 pound plates

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