Heartbroke

Well this month has always been hard for me. Today is the anniversary of my mothers death which was 8 years ago and in 6 days it will be the anniversary of my fathers death 16 years ago. I absolutely hate this day not only because I cant celebrate with my man but also because of what it stands for to me. Then I have everyone running around all chipper because they are "in love" and others upset because they have no one "special" in their lives to spend it with. I havent seen my man in 7 months but given the choice between seeing him today or my mother I would choose my mother. David would certainately understand and would definitely encourage it. Today no matter what I do or who I spend it with I always feel alone. And loneliness usually means eating for me. Today I am trying to stray away from that one but it is just a little more depressing I think to realize that I cant even eat!!!! I think they put leap year on the wrong date of this month.......

Replies

  • i can't imagine what that feels like, it must be so hard to have to go through it year after year. maybe you could use today to celebrate your mothers life, and remember all the wonderful things about her. losing somebody you love, especially a parent, is the hardest thing in the world - but sometimes you have to let go to feel at peace. i hope you get through today, and if you need to treat yourself ( a little bit) and take it easy today, thats ok.

    also, celebrating the day with your man isn't a disgrace to your mother - you can still celebrate your love. i'm sure she would have wanted you to be happy and in love <3

    so sorry for your loss

    christine
  • patticarbjunkie
    patticarbjunkie Posts: 133 Member
    Hi,

    I lost my mother also it has been four years, but seems like yesterday. I hate the anniversary of her death, but everyday is hard because I think about her a million times a day!! This must be such a hard time for you!! Thinking about you and hope you are ok!
  • notmac
    notmac Posts: 89
    I am so sorry for your loss of your parents. I have also lost both parents, so I can relate. While neither was on Valentines day, a day everyone makes such a big deal about, I know it is so much a reminder for you, not a easy day to let slip by on the calender.
    You'r mom would want you to try to be happy, spend some time today, thinking about the fun times you and your mom had, celebrate the love you and she shared, cry some, and try to laugh some also. I fully understand why you would choose to spend some time with her. Hang in there, this week will pass, try to find a smile in your day, know, that somewhere, that will make your mom smile.
  • Thank you guys for your encouragement..... and I hope you guys are having a great V-day. Your words have helped make mine a little better