Reality Check

tj1376

I have been obsessing about the forum for weeks now, reading this one and that one. Commenting on some of them. But here is what I have noticed.

I recently saw a post about how thin people don't look at what they are eating and they don't count calories. Good for them. That in NOOOO way means you should be comparing yourself to those people. They aren't the same as you. Hell, no two bigger people are the same either and how they lose weight will never be identical.

I equate thin people/big people eating and exercise habits to studying. Thin people who have never been fat are just naturally good at staying thin. The same way that some people are naturally good at learning and never have to crack a book to get straight A's. Meanwhile, bigger people have to struggle with what they eat and pay A LOT more attention to food and exercise than we would sometimes like to achieve what thin people do without trying. . Just like all those people who have to study their @ss's off to get a good grade.

We all got this way because we didn't pay attention to our diets and we weren't as exercise inclined as we probably should have been. Now we are trying and that's awesome! But don't use excuses to cheat or quit. And stop enabling people with cheat days - that is annoying. Its like a drug addict in recovery being told he can have a cheat day - it ruins everything you have been trying to accomplish. If you want a piece of cake or a night out of binge drinking, then you need to do the exercise to make sure you can cover your indulgence. Cheating never got anyone anywhere. (except politicians)

And if you have been at this a month and the scale isn't moving, stop whining about it and think its OK to quit. Your just looking for an excuse to do that. Consider that either your not really trying that hard, or what your trying doesn't work for YOU (just because 100 people on the forums says its great doesn't mean its great for you). Try something different. Take a really hard look at what your doing and be realistic - are you being honest about what your eating and how much activity you are actually getting?

This is a place for people who are trying to get healthy and I love it. But people need to be realistic. You cant continue to enable those who want to eat McDonald everyday, tell them its OK, you will do better next time. All you end up with is another post about how they aren't losing any weight. Clearly that doesn't work. You also cant tell people that they need to just stick with what they have been doing if that is clearly not working for them. If you are really serious then you should consider talking to a nutritionist (MFP forum stalkers are not experts (this includes me) on what YOU should and shouldn't be eating) and ask your doctor and/or an exercise expert what your level of activity should be and what might work for you.

:explode: :mad: :huh:
Disclaimer: This has been my rant for the week. Yes, I am a hypocrite as I will continue to encourage those who complain about all of the above, including myself. Do not expect that encouragement to be free of sarcasm, opinions and/or advice (that will probably not work for you).

quirkytizzy

Meanwhile, bigger people have to struggle with what they eat and pay A LOT more attention to food and exercise than we would sometimes like to achieve what thin people do without trying. . Just like all those people who have to study their @ss's off to get a good grade.

We all got this way because we didn't pay attention to our diets and we weren't as exercise inclined as we probably should have been. Now we are trying and that's awesome!

I especially like this. It acknowledges that different people have different struggles and that some things are always going to be harder for some people than it is for others. I think people (myself included in many, many things) berate themselves for having to make the effort at all - WITHOUT realizing that the effort alone makes them worthy.

Fantastic post. I very, very much needed to read that this morning. Thank you.

tj1376

Thanks - at least I know my loss of patience this wee helped one person.

HopefulMomofanAngel

Great post! I completely agree with you. Yes, I love to give positive encouragment, but I hate those people that compare everything to everyone else and the results they are getting. I feel that if people are really trying and doing what they should, then they will see the results. Yes, it takes time and can be really frustrating, but only you can get yourself there. I think the whole point is to do for yourself...when you lie to yourself or cheat yourself, you have no one else to blame. I love the comparison on the school grades...I never have thought of it like that, but it is so true. Thanks for writing this post..it was definitely much needed and an eye opener!

ToFatToBeSick

Love the post, however I'm sure thin people do in fact watch what they eat and some do count calories.

carbar90

This is awesome!! thank you for your great words, I'll think of this when I get discouraged

wade78

Love the post, however I'm sure thin people do in fact watch what they eat and some do count calories.

Yes I totally agree. I think that people that can eat anything and in large quantities AND still not put on weight are actually not that common.

I think most thin people do what watch what they eat but have probably developed good eating habits from a very early age so its second nature to them and therefore done seem like they are on a diet.