inaccurate self image

kajaknowers

I was just curious how people perceived their sizes when they were at their largest. When I was my biggest, what I saw in the mirror definitely didn't look they way I looked in photos. Whilst when I was skinny, I thought I was heavier....I was just curious if any other people felt the same when they looked at photos going "Oh god, thats an aweful photo...I look so fat" but yet didn't really register it (probably through denial).

x

KeriD

Yes.....same thing for me. I would dress nicely, look in the mirror and think not too bad. Now I have lost almost 40 pounds and all I see is more fat!!!!

MissingMinnesota

Yeah I was the same way. I was just looking at pictures from christmas going how could my fingers be that fat or in a group picture thinking I was the same size as the others and then I am huge.

aippolito1

You are your worst critic. It is so true!! I hate it. My bf gets upset with me 'cause I'll think I look slamming, then we'll take a picture and I'll delete it 'cause I look fat. It's really hard to have a healthy self image... like, I feel great about myself...I just don't like looking at myself in pictures. I love looking in the mirror because I know it's not a round lens that's ballooning me! lol

kajaknowers

it makes me cringe that I could be so oblivious to my size....denial is powerful tool in preventing weight loss....When I look in the mirror nowadays I am more over critical as I no longer distort my self-image x

tayner

i always knew i was overweight, but i never saw myself in the mirror the same as in photos... i am still the same way though, even after significant weight loss.. maybe when i get to onederland I will be happier with pictures.

AmandaB4588

Pictures were always shocking to me when I was at my heaviest. Looking back on old photos of that time, they are STILL shocking! I never realized I was that heavy.

At the same time.... now that I am losing more weight, people are commenting on it all the time. My sister said just this morning, "MAN I can really tell that you are losing weight, wow." I don't know what they are looking at because I can't tell at all!

KeriD

My husband....poor guy....has to hear all my whining about this topic....he made a very good point to me the other day.....what you see in the mirror is actually a flat 2d image and not a true representation of how you really look to others. In other words...don't be so hard on yourself.

Wolfena

When I was a teenager and 105 pounds I thought I was fat... because I had a little pooch under my belly button (I am 5'5")

When I was 20 years old and 127 pounds, with a 2 year old child (and bulimic) I thought I was obese - because not matter how much I exercised and didn't eat, I couldn't seem to get back to 105-110 pounds, and that belly pooch had really grown after giving birth.

When I was 35 years old and 208 pounds, I had no idea I weighed that much.... I just thought I was really un-photogenic and always looked fat in pictures. After 3 kids, I knew I would never be 110 pounds again but I still felt mentally the same and thought I was okay. I didn't see myself as fat when I looked in the mirror. I was a thin person living in some strange fat person's body.

Now that I am 41 and 150 pounds, I still see myself as 200 pounds. I am now an overweight chick living in some thinner person's body - I don't even recognize me in photos right away. I look in the mirror and see imperfection, lumps and the need to lose more weight.

I don't think I'll ever have a "correct" self image! :laugh:

Knowing what I am and feeling that way are two totally different things.

llyndon

I was never overweight until I hit my 40s then I blew up! Back when I was thin I always thought I looked fat, now I AM fat and I look in the mirror and think I look great. But heaven help me when one of my friends takes a picture of me, it looks like they moved a sofa in the room and dressed it in my clothes. YIKES! The mind does play tricks.

themethod

When I was in high school (5'10" and 160 lbs), I thought I was one of the biggest girls in school. When I was in my mid-20s (5'11" and 155), I thought I was soft and wide and round, and I would never show my stomach. At 29 (6'0" and 205+), I knew I was big, and I knew I looked fat in pictures, but I figured I must not look that bad because no one ever said anything to me about being overweight, and I still got attention from guys that were attracted to "thick" girls. I dressed nicely and kept my hair, nails, and face done and figured I looked decent.

Then I got that letter from the health insurance company, you may know the one I'm talking about, telling me that I was obese and needed to lose and telling me what all of my risk factors were for being so overweight. The biggest thing I remember from the letter was that it highlighted 147 as being my ideal weight. And then I got motivated and started losing.

Now, when I look at myself in pictures (6'0" around 172 lbs), or in the mirror, I see the tummy pooch and the dimpled thighs, and the flabby arms, and the love handles and saddlebags. When I put my clothes on, I can't believe how big they are on me because I feel like there is such an expanse for them to cover. Lots of people comment on how much smaller I look, but although I feel better health wise, I don't see it when I look in the mirror.

That's why I did comparison photos, so I can have a fat picture and a non-fat picture right next to each other and see the physical differences.

I, too, wonder if my self-image will ever be correct.

foxyforce

i too struggle with my self image. recently i had changed my goal so that i stop focusing on my actual weight and measurements and more on how i feel and actually perceive myself. this way, when i feel the happiest with myself, i may weigh and measure myself and find my happy weight!
i find that clothing if anything really effects how i feel, i have a lot of stuff i can't fit into anymore, and i am convinced my dryer shrunk some of them...when i am at that happy weight i will go shopping and see if it is true.

bebhinn

When I was in high school (5'10" and 160 lbs), I thought I was one of the biggest girls in school. When I was in my mid-20s (5'11" and 155), I thought I was soft and wide and round, and I would never show my stomach. At 29 (6'0" and 205+), I knew I was big, and I knew I looked fat in pictures, but I figured I must not look that bad because no one ever said anything to me about being overweight, and I still got attention from guys that were attracted to "thick" girls. I dressed nicely and kept my hair, nails, and face done and figured I looked decent.

Then I got that letter from the health insurance company, you may know the one I'm talking about, telling me that I was obese and needed to lose and telling me what all of my risk factors were for being so overweight. The biggest thing I remember from the letter was that it highlighted 147 as being my ideal weight. And then I got motivated and started losing.

Now, when I look at myself in pictures (6'0" around 172 lbs), or in the mirror, I see the tummy pooch and the dimpled thighs, and the flabby arms, and the love handles and saddlebags. When I put my clothes on, I can't believe how big they are on me because I feel like there is such an expanse for them to cover. Lots of people comment on how much smaller I look, but although I feel better health wise, I don't see it when I look in the mirror.

That's why I did comparison photos, so I can have a fat picture and a non-fat picture right next to each other and see the physical differences.

I, too, wonder if my self-image will ever be correct.

I'm sorry, 147 is ideal at 6' tall? I remember being about 175 at 6' tall and being pretty skinny :S I would think that is almost a bit too low. I"m glad we don't have insurance companies to pester us here in Canada :S

themethod

When I was in high school (5'10" and 160 lbs), I thought I was one of the biggest girls in school. When I was in my mid-20s (5'11" and 155), I thought I was soft and wide and round, and I would never show my stomach. At 29 (6'0" and 205+), I knew I was big, and I knew I looked fat in pictures, but I figured I must not look that bad because no one ever said anything to me about being overweight, and I still got attention from guys that were attracted to "thick" girls. I dressed nicely and kept my hair, nails, and face done and figured I looked decent.

Then I got that letter from the health insurance company, you may know the one I'm talking about, telling me that I was obese and needed to lose and telling me what all of my risk factors were for being so overweight. The biggest thing I remember from the letter was that it highlighted 147 as being my ideal weight. And then I got motivated and started losing.

Now, when I look at myself in pictures (6'0" around 172 lbs), or in the mirror, I see the tummy pooch and the dimpled thighs, and the flabby arms, and the love handles and saddlebags. When I put my clothes on, I can't believe how big they are on me because I feel like there is such an expanse for them to cover. Lots of people comment on how much smaller I look, but although I feel better health wise, I don't see it when I look in the mirror.

That's why I did comparison photos, so I can have a fat picture and a non-fat picture right next to each other and see the physical differences.

I, too, wonder if my self-image will ever be correct.

I'm sorry, 147 is ideal at 6' tall? I remember being about 175 at 6' tall and being pretty skinny :S I would think that is almost a bit too low. I"m glad we don't have insurance companies to pester us here in Canada :S

I agree, I don't want to be 147!!!! That was just my wakeup call.

Ecourter22509

Its weird for me, when i look in the mirror at my house, i think " ok not bad this look pretty good im looking nice today." but the sedond i see of picture of even the same day i look 3 times bigger, or i see my reflection anywhere other then the mirrors at my house i think i look so big. so idk if its the fact that im just feel comfortable at my house or what. SO thats what its like for me!

kwardklinck

I found some old pictures of myself from 4 years ago. I'm 30 pounds less since then and I can tell a huge change. My face and neck look especially thin in the newer pictures. I also think I look younger even though I'm having a little sagging just below my chin that I didn't have before. These things keep it in perspective for me. I can see that I look better in pictures even when I can't tell a difference in the mirror.

irunwithscissors

I agree. I always think I look ok, knowing that I am overweight, but feeling that I look ok, but then I see a picture of myself and can't believe it's me. I get really grossed out at my pictures. I always look so unhappy because my face is so chubby, and looking at the roundness of my shape....eww. I have this mirror at home that makes me look thinner than other mirrors, it's horrible. I go to work thinking ok, I look fine, fat but fine, and being a hairstylist I look at myself in the mirror all day long, so I catch a peek of myself and realize that really I look like hell. There are mirrors everywhere! I hate it!
I haven't had a 'damn I look good' moment in probably two years. But I will soon! Well maybe in a few months.....

LittleSpy

Yep. Except mine is the opposite of most of the rest of you. I've lost 64 pounds and when I look in the mirror I still see pretty much the same thing as I saw at 270. My self image was realistic at 270. And now I think I look 64 pounds heavier than I am. It's not until I compare before & after pictures, or just barely catch a glimpse of myself do I see the difference. It's very odd. I guess my brain will catch up someday.

deeann1459

Even at a weight were I am ripped, I still think I look horrible... but I suck at taking photos. The flash always startles me so I bring my head back and gain a double chin (fun fact: I don't have a double chin)

But it is great, because I always hear that I am skinnier/look better in person than in photos

pinbotchick

Well I never felt that I had gained weight. I always felt that I was still skinny and the photos were just way off and my husband who does the laundry had "shrunk" my clothes. So when I had my wake up call when the scale tipped 237 and my 20s were tight, I finally found MFP. 6 months later and 47 pounds gone and I still have self image problems. I still feel the same weight. I went shopping last weekend and was shocked when Large tops and size 14 pants fit. It was surreal. Even today when I went to wear the new jeans, I thought oh they probably shrank in the wash and wont fit. But boy, do I feel great since the new jeans went right on and look great. Slowly but surely, I am learning to accept my new body image. It really is hard to adjust to changes either way - gaining or losing weight. Good luck to all in gaining a better true self image.

questionablemethods

I definitely can relate. I never ever felt I was as heavy as I looked in pictures. I thought my jeans were shrinking, etc. I don't see a lot of change in the mirror because I never really saw the weight in the mirror either.

cds2327

I remember when I was wearing size 10 jeans, I thought they were so big.
Now, I look at them......holy cow I was skinny!!!!

KarenECunningham

The same thing happens to me. I am always shocked when I see pictures of myself.

megamom

Last time I went on a weight loss effort I went through a big dose of self loathing. It was like I looked at myself for the first time. I had to really work on getting over that. It was very destructive. Now I have a better outlook and although I still won't get my photo taken willingly I no longer hate myself like I did back then. So I believe that will be my success.

ractayjon

Add me to this club. In pictures I NEVER like the way I look...i always delete the pictures of me or try to hide behind others in pictures. I practiced holding my head a certain way so that when I smile I dont have a double chin (and whenever the picture gets taken I never hold my head that *right* way!!).
I see myself as fat. period. fat. I dont see myself as large as some people are...I "compare" myself to some friends and I know that I am thinner then they are but I dont feel thin because then I compare myself to others and I know Im bigger so it brings me down. Im so sick of comparing myself to others....I want to comapre myself to myself and somehow be ok with what I see!
When I started at MFP I was wearing a 10/12 and now Im in a 6/8 - I have never been less then a 6 in my adult life so I know that no matter what I do Im not going to get skinnier - maybe more toned or more lean but not skinner I dont have a size 4 body. When Im naked and I look at myself Im miserable....but when I dress I can be ok with what I see until I see others?! I have a lot of body fat (according to those measuring things- calipers) like 25%!? But, my legs are solid, I dont have cellulite (lucky genes there) and barely any strecth marks (4 kids, 3 pregnancies) so I am lucky there...but I see fat on my stomach and become miserable, or my triceps and cringe or the worst for me is the "back fat" that us women have to deal with ...I put on my bra and then my shirt and I can be looking in the mirror feeling pretty ok then I look at the back and see that tightness of the bra, the overhang of the back fat and I have to throw a sweater, sweatshirt on over the shirt because I am MORTIFIED by that!
I go out in the warm weather and see girls or women that are so confident . You can see it in how they walk. Some of these women look like they didnt look in a mirror before they left the hosue (clothes to tight, outfits that show skin where they shouldnt show skin, the "muffin top"....but they are SO confident. I want to be confident....but I dont know that I will ever get there?!

CrazyAdventures

OMG, I swore this was just happening to me I've lost almost 40 lbs and sometimes I see the "old" me in the mirror. It takes seeing update pictures of my self to see how much I've lost, or measurements.

Sunsh1ne

Photos are always harsher than the mirror when you're big, because you can't shift your hips and lift your chin and fool yourself into looking skinnier in a photo. And now that I've lost a little weight I'm definitely more aware of the excess and I HATE it! 13 pounds ago, I was never this mad at my poochy tummy!

Happyoceangirl

I am experiencing this too. I had no idea I truly looked the way I did. I'm completely amazed when I look at pictures - I must have been in a deep deep state of denial.

So, the wake up call was good - but now it makes me distrustful of my own judgement. I feel like I look pretty good now (but then again, I felt fairly comfortable before) - so what kind of gauge is that? AN UNRELIABLE ONE! Depending on my mood I can see all my imperfections in the mirror, or proof of improvements.

The mind is a tricky little *kitten*. I do have to wonder - how will I know when I'm truly at my body's "happy state" ??