trying to beat anorexia for the 3rd time

bchemeng

i am doing this on my own.
I am 18 years old
Female.
Studying chemical engineering in Bham-UK
I dont consider myself anorixic anymore as i have started eating again properly
Excersing regularly-5 times a week [weights and cardio for an hour]
Got my period back after loosing it for a year, getting it back and then loosing it for another year. got it back again now
Started this healthy lifestyle for about four months till now
I am gaining weight like crazy. it is freaking me out.
I just dont know what is happening to my body right now. it is suposed to get better but it is getting worse only with time.
I know i am gaining weight because i damaged my metabolism and that my body is in dire need of nutrients and repair
But when will this weight gain stop? when will i start seeing the results everyone else is getting? 6 months, a year...when?
Tried counslelling, they only talk about the pschycological point of view. i dont feel i need this, i dont want to be skinny, i want to look lean and strong.
I am very aware of the fact that not eating wont get me there. i just need scientific facts, something that can tell me what to expect from my body, what will happen to it during the time ill be excersing. i just need information. i dont know where should i go to to find someone with that kind of information. i am hoping somone can help me here.

I dont know what i really want to know, just any information about this would be usefull. please help.

becky123456

Can you possibly find a nutritionist or dietician or someone who is knowledgable about these issues? Perhaps start with a medical doctor? Good luck to you.

sweetbn

I know how you feel - the gaining weight part IS scary.

I think there are too many factors to give you a straight answer - weight, height, age, exact measurements number of calories, etc.

I bet you would be best to find a psychiatrist that will help you with both the mental AND physicologic answers. You say you don't need the psych help, but it does pay off...

Best of luck to you - keep it up - and I hope you can find an MD to answer your questions.

EKarma

Welcome to MyFitnessPal! You will find all kinds of support here. So keep your head up and keep going. That's what it's all about. You're wanting to get healthy and only you have the power to do it. So good job for joining this site. Good luck on your journey.

love and light,
E.Karma

suziblues2000

Congratulations on your way to getting healthy!

You say you've been eating healthy and exercising healthy for about 4 months and you are gaining weight like crazy?

Well I don't know what you weigh now, or what you weighed before, but if you are eating healthy and you are still gaining weight maybe it's a good thing? Maybe your body is trying to get back to where it's suppose to be? I don't know. Like I said, I have no idea what's going on with your weight and nobody else here does either.

You say your body is getting only worse with time? Even though you're eating healthy? How is it getting worse? Are you sure it's getting worse? Just because you are gaining weight doesn't necessarily mean it's getting worse. It may take quite a long time to get healthy again.

My opinion: I think you should talk to a professional nutritionist about what you posted. Anorexia is nothing to fool around with and even though you are not anorexic anymore you said that 4 short months ago you were.

I wish you good luck and hopefully somebody here can give you some scientific advice that you want/need.

megamom

It is hard to tell no knowing what your weight was and what your perception is of gaining to much weight. Plus on your ticker you have you want to lose weight. I think like the others, this site is great and will give you great support and insight in how nutritious your meals are but I also think you need to see someone who deals with anorexia and can help you so you don't slip again. It helps to make your diary public.

Edestiny7

If you are building muscle, using the weights, you will gain muscle weight. A pound of muscle weighs the same as a pound of fat, but a pound of fat takes up 3x - 5x as much volume. Have you considered getting a composition body scan? We just bought a Homedics Tri-Fitness HealthStation with CaloriePredictor and it tells you your body fat, body water, muscle mass, & bone mass. It does say the calculations can vary from other measurements you have taken, but it at least can give you an idea of WHAT is changing over time. Ideally you want your muscle mass to be between a certain range based on your weight, same with body fat.

kwardklinck

Honey do you need to gain weight? I'm looking at your ticker and it looks like you're trying to gain 50 pounds. If gaining weight is your goal, you may need to do it very slowly. If you do it too fast, it could throw your body into shock. I would definitely consult a doctor and a dietician to find the healthiest way to do this.

kwardklinck

It is hard to tell no knowing what your weight was and what your perception is of gaining to much weight. Plus on your ticker you have you want to lose weight. I think like the others, this site is great and will give you great support and insight in how nutritious your meals are but I also think you need to see someone who deals with anorexia and can help you so you don't slip again. It helps to make your diary public.

Her ticker says -50 pounds. I'm reading as that's how much she wants to gain. Yet, she's freaking out about gaining weight. I guess that's the anorexia talking? However, you don't want to gain too fast as it can have serious consequences. You really need professional help with this hon.

sonjavon

I honestly have no advice for you as I have never had anorexia and can't even fathom what you must be feeling and going through. I, like others would say you probably should talk to a nutritionist who has dealt with eating disorders.

What I DO want to do is offer my support. MFP is a wonderful place to be - a very supportive community. I would warn you to be very careful about which advice you follow as most of the people here are trying to lose weight... not gain. We're all here for you though and I commend you on your decision to be healthy!

with7kids

When I was much younger - close to your age - I had what they called exercise bulimia. I would eat a head of iceberg lettuce most days with a cupful of lemon juice and salt and pepper. I would then proceed to not arf it up but instead bike 10 miles. I weighed 91 lbs and am 5'9" tall. I looked like a very sick person and still felt very fat.

It took getting pregnant with my daughter to quit the self destructive behavior. However, even 18 years later I won't own a scale in the house. I am having a very hard time with eating all the food I have been - fell back into stress/control not eating mode! I feel ill because of eating, but I am going to choose not to die because of lack of it.

I messed up my heart and my body back then. Now I am fighting Adrenal failure. I have to eat to get better.

If your goal is to eat right, DO NOT look at the weight gain. It will drop you back into destructive mode. Get rid of all full body mirrors. I would say to talk to a shrink and nutritionist person about diet and good healthy eating choices. I will be praying for you as I know very well what a pit you must climb from!

themethod

I am going to assume that since you're upset about gaining weight, that the numbers you put in as your starting weight and your goal weight may not be accurate. For instance, perhaps you simply chose a random goal weight just to fill it in, and don't actually intend to gain 50 pounds. The reason I'm going to assume this is that logically it would follow that if you are having a problem now with being disappointed regarding gaining weight, you have not yet developed the coping mechanisms you are going to need to put on 50 pounds.

You say you are trying to do this on your own. I think you will find it is harder than you realize. There are very few people who are successful at dealing with eating disorders or depression or addiction (yes, they all go together) by themselves. That is why there are so many groups out there that will offer you help, even at no cost. You say that the counselor you went to only talked about the psychological stuff... guess what, that is their job and that is why you are there - to get their help dealing with the psychological aspects of anorexia.

I have seen too many teenage girls go through this from years of working in the school system, and I would hate to see you have to suffer even one day further. What you may want to see as "lean and toned" when you look in the mirror, may look to other people like severe illness. You need to realize that if you have anorexia, your brain is unable to look at the scientific facts you are seeking and logically apply them to your situation. It's like trying to have a conversation in English with someone who only speaks Farsi.

Please seek help from a counselor, a medical doctor, a nutritionist, or an eating disorder specialist. This is not something that you should have to do alone, as long as you are willing to commit to treatment. Also, no one will be able to answer what is going to happen to your body because your body has already been damaged. Something that is damaged is unpredictable and therefore I would encourage you to be under the supervision of a doctor who will be prepared to deal with all of the possibile complications that may arise.

I'm so glad that you're looking for answers, that is a good step. Perhaps for the next step you can seek guidance from a professional.

SydneyLedger

First of all, kudos to you to wanting to help yourself. You've signed into a community of people who do truly care, and who provide unbiased advice. I know you're probably more than scared, as you are doing something that is life changing....but I will agree with some of the other people here and say that you probably shouldn't do this alone. A support system like MFP is absolutely fabulous, but I think you can set yourself up for success if you get to consulting with a nutritionist. I also think, as someone else suggested, that you should definitely look for a support group or seek some sort of help from a doctor. Your brain needs some reconditioning, too, and you will certainly become a healthier person if you make sure you're thinking positive thoughts!! Good luck to you!