it's 9pm and my friend has had 311 calories

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  • hooah_mj
    hooah_mj Posts: 1,004 Member
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    did she tell you this? = seeking attention

    did you discover this? = seek attention

    if its the latter, you'll beat yourself up if she destroys herself & you didn't lay it on the line....
  • TalonaCat
    TalonaCat Posts: 241
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    Ya know...regardless of what this girl is doing with her calories....the bigger picture here, the one that I am seeing, is the total disrespect that YOU have for your "friend'
    To call anyone a retard or a fool, especially one that you consider to be your friend is just wrong! :angry:

    moving on.......

    Woooooah... First of all, no one here knows what sort of bantering relationship she and her friend may have. My best friend and I playfully call each other names all the time. And she's on this website, so you can ask her if you want. Second, maybe she's planning on showing this to her friend, and the information that we've all given here as a 'wakeup' call.

    I can see where some people may think that she's completely badmouthing her friend.. but we don't KNOW that. Text is a horrible communication device. I say there's a pretty good chance her friend has seen what she's posted (because she wanted her to see) and that it was her attempt at humor.
  • Sunsh1ne
    Sunsh1ne Posts: 879 Member
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    Hungry =/= healthy - hunger is your body telling you that you NEED more. Admittedly it can be hard for some people to distinguish between true hunger, the physiological need, and fake hunger, the psychological desire, but if she has had 311 calories today and she's more than 18 inches tall, it's REAL hunger and her body needs REAL calories to fuel it's REAL vital processes. Your body is a marvel of biological engineering - but even a marvelous car can't run the Indy 500 without any gas in the tank.
  • fearlessfatty
    fearlessfatty Posts: 206 Member
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    it was 311 she had eaten in a day - not 311 left for the day. i should've been clearer
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
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    I think you were totally clear. "It's 9pm and my friend has had 311 calories"
  • fearlessfatty
    fearlessfatty Posts: 206 Member
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    Wow!! Talona Cat - you are a brilliant feline! i am reading these posts to her right now!! and thank you everyone for "weighing" in on this!!!
  • sparkles321
    sparkles321 Posts: 107
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    Wow, calm down. If her friend had guzzled a 6 pack of beer and jumped behind the wheel of her car, we'd all be calling her an idiot. What her friend is doing is just as reckless (even if the danger is only to herself). Would you really mind your own business if a friend wanted to drive drunk? Would you really take a meager stance and not call her out? Personally, that's not the type of person I would call a friend. A true friend, in my opinion, slaps me in the face when I'm being an idiot and tries to get me to see reason. Or maybe I just prefer friends who would actually say something if I got too close to the edge of the cliff?

    That said, you can only do so much. You can try talking to her about the dangers of eating so little and whatnot. Keep in mind that she has taken classes and she has obviously learned nothing from them. And since you're no expert, she may not listen to anything you have to say. If she's the type who has to be right and likes to have the final word, you could always ask for proof that she's right. In her search to prove you wrong, she might (stress the word, might) realize that she's taking a dangerous path.

    After that, you will just have to let her go the path and fall on her face. You can't always save your friends from their own decisions, but you can be there to help them pick up the pieces.
  • Mom2Emery_Liam
    Mom2Emery_Liam Posts: 149
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    Wow there's no way I could ever eat that little- ha I barely keep a meal under 300 calories!
    Definitely need to let her know that's not healthy and she will regain the weight in a worse way if she continues this...
  • spicy618
    spicy618 Posts: 2,114 Member
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    it was 311 she had eaten in a day - not 311 left for the day. i should've been clearer

    You expressed yourself clear enough, for me and MOST of the other people who took the TIME to READ and COMPREHEND!
  • kwardklinck
    kwardklinck Posts: 1,601
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    I have more than that for breakfast! Silly girl. I don't know why so many of us just don't understand how our metabolism works.
  • tinasullens
    tinasullens Posts: 203 Member
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    I know this is a serious topic, but I just snickered out loud:
    doe snot

    I make thousands of typos so I'm not calling it out or anything, I just found it funny.
    OK, back to serious-ness: What she's doing shows the beginning stages of anorexia....

    I totally missed that the first time! LOL, gotta love typos...I make more than my fair share too!
  • Rugbychick16
    Rugbychick16 Posts: 183 Member
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    Ya know...regardless of what this girl is doing with her calories....the bigger picture here, the one that I am seeing, is the total disrespect that YOU have for your "friend'
    To call anyone a retard or a fool, especially one that you consider to be your friend is just wrong! :angry:

    moving on.......

    Woooooah... First of all, no one here knows what sort of bantering relationship she and her friend may have. My best friend and I playfully call each other names all the time.

    My husband and I play like that all the time! We lay in bed and call each other names until the other person can't even think of another one!

    Going back to the topic, I worked with a girl like that once, and, much like when people told me about over eating, she didn't believe she had a problem. I found some topics online about low calorie consumption, and I e-mailed them to her, with a note "Just a little something I thought you might like to read - luv ya". and let her do what she needed to do. :flowerforyou: Hope it works out!

    (PS last year I found out I had a spot of skin cancer, and since then I tell everyone to wear sunscreen, and sometimes people laugh at me and tell me I'm over re-acting. Sometimes people just don't want to listen)
  • kwardklinck
    kwardklinck Posts: 1,601
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    Ya know...regardless of what this girl is doing with her calories....the bigger picture here, the one that I am seeing, is the total disrespect that YOU have for your "friend'
    To call anyone a retard or a fool, especially one that you consider to be your friend is just wrong! :angry:

    moving on.......

    I'm sure she really does love her friend. She's talking out of frustration. She's probably been talking to her about it and the friend won't listen. I have that problem with certain family members and find I just have to hold my tongue to keep from screaming at them for the things they do in the name of "weight loss".
  • Yurippe
    Yurippe Posts: 850 Member
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    Ya know...regardless of what this girl is doing with her calories....the bigger picture here, the one that I am seeing, is the total disrespect that YOU have for your "friend'
    To call anyone a retard or a fool, especially one that you consider to be your friend is just wrong! :angry:

    moving on.......

    Woooooah... First of all, no one here knows what sort of bantering relationship she and her friend may have. My best friend and I playfully call each other names all the time. And she's on this website, so you can ask her if you want. Second, maybe she's planning on showing this to her friend, and the information that we've all given here as a 'wakeup' call.

    I can see where some people may think that she's completely badmouthing her friend.. but we don't KNOW that. Text is a horrible communication device. I say there's a pretty good chance her friend has seen what she's posted (because she wanted her to see) and that it was her attempt at humor.

    This has been bugging me since yesterday. I was hoping this post would just disapear quickly. Since it's still circulating in recent posts I feel the need to say something.

    Regardless of what sort of relationship they have this was posted on a public forum. Retard is considered a hate word by a lot of people. I've tried to remove it from my vocabulary. For anyone that doesn't see a problem with the word please check out the below link to see where I'm coming from:

    http://soct.convio.net/site/PageServer?pagename=BantheRword

    A very small portion of a letter posted on that site:

    Our “Spread the Word to End the Word” campaign is aimed at changing the perception that the R-word is acceptable and the good news is that the world is beginning to slowly change. Classrooms are becoming more tolerant, communities more accepting and the work place more inclusive as people with intellectual disabilities are slowly being seen for what we’ve always known them to be – people of value who help us all to understand we are each gifted in unique
    ways. But this change is too slow and each use of the R-word as a synonym for a stupid action, a schoolyard taunt, or the punch line of a joke, slows our progress immeasurably.

    Great heroes like Special Olympics athlete Loretta Claiborne, are visiting school after school to explain that "retard" and "retarded" are words that caused them unbearable pain as children and continue to reflect deep misunderstanding today. Loretta has the courage to face her disability in public, to ask that others treat her with respect, and to ask for more sensitive and caring attitudes in the future. In response, many are joining her, Special Olympics, Best Buddies, and a coalition of organizations in asking children to pledge never to use the word again – not as a joke, not as a description of behavior, not as an epithet. In my own experience, when I ask people – be they first graders or media figures – to join in stopping the casual use of the word "retarded", they universally agree to do so. Most want to go further: they want to understand better how they can serve as agents of acceptance and dignity.
  • Rugbychick16
    Rugbychick16 Posts: 183 Member
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    Okay, this is getting way off topic here (again). She posted this because she has a questions. That is what these boards are for. Hence ``General diet and weight loss help``. So, if you have any comments or help with regards to her question, post it, because that is what she is looking for.

    If your just reading this and getting all fired about about what kind of friend she is, or what words she used, click somewhere else and move away from this topic. It`s that simple.

    She isn`t trying to offend anyone, she isn`t trying to hurt anyone, she is trying to get an answer. And this has gotten so far off the topic because people can`t leave well enough alone, that she is getting criticized for trying to help her friend. Is this really what these boards have come to - a place to critique and criticize someones every word.

    Cos that`s pretty crappy. And it`s not why most of us are here.

    (And let the comments towards this post start flying. In the meantime, I`m gonna go finish my food diary- cos that`s why I`m here.)
  • innerhottie
    innerhottie Posts: 163 Member
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    Ya know...regardless of what this girl is doing with her calories....the bigger picture here, the one that I am seeing, is the total disrespect that YOU have for your "friend'
    To call anyone a retard or a fool, especially one that you consider to be your friend is just wrong! :angry:

    moving on.......

    Woooooah... First of all, no one here knows what sort of bantering relationship she and her friend may have. My best friend and I playfully call each other names all the time. And she's on this website, so you can ask her if you want. Second, maybe she's planning on showing this to her friend, and the information that we've all given here as a 'wakeup' call.

    I can see where some people may think that she's completely badmouthing her friend.. but we don't KNOW that. Text is a horrible communication device. I say there's a pretty good chance her friend has seen what she's posted (because she wanted her to see) and that it was her attempt at humor.

    This has been bugging me since yesterday. I was hoping this post would just disapear quickly. Since it's still circulating in recent posts I feel the need to say something.

    Regardless of what sort of relationship they have this was posted on a public forum. Retard is considered a hate word by a lot of people. I've tried to remove it from my vocabulary. For anyone that doesn't see a problem with the word please check out the below link to see where I'm coming from:

    http://soct.convio.net/site/PageServer?pagename=BantheRword

    A very small portion of a letter posted on that site:

    Our “Spread the Word to End the Word” campaign is aimed at changing the perception that the R-word is acceptable and the good news is that the world is beginning to slowly change. Classrooms are becoming more tolerant, communities more accepting and the work place more inclusive as people with intellectual disabilities are slowly being seen for what we’ve always known them to be – people of value who help us all to understand we are each gifted in unique
    ways. But this change is too slow and each use of the R-word as a synonym for a stupid action, a schoolyard taunt, or the punch line of a joke, slows our progress immeasurably.

    Great heroes like Special Olympics athlete Loretta Claiborne, are visiting school after school to explain that "retard" and "retarded" are words that caused them unbearable pain as children and continue to reflect deep misunderstanding today. Loretta has the courage to face her disability in public, to ask that others treat her with respect, and to ask for more sensitive and caring attitudes in the future. In response, many are joining her, Special Olympics, Best Buddies, and a coalition of organizations in asking children to pledge never to use the word again – not as a joke, not as a description of behavior, not as an epithet. In my own experience, when I ask people – be they first graders or media figures – to join in stopping the casual use of the word "retarded", they universally agree to do so. Most want to go further: they want to understand better how they can serve as agents of acceptance and dignity.

    Thank you for posting that! As the sister of a mentally and physically retarded person I have grown weary of the use of the word. I had no idea about this website... I will absolutely check it out.

    As far as the friend goes, if she has taken nutrition classes, she knows very well that what she is doing is dangerous. I would express my concern once and then let it go. She is an adult, right?
  • hollymires
    hollymires Posts: 117
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    bad news...that way of dieting NEVER works in the long run...not only does it harm your body...it harms your attitude. Eat your calories...exercise and live life!:noway:

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