Chuck Norris....

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pucenavel
pucenavel Posts: 972 Member
in Chit-Chat
I was just reminded of these & looking to see if there are some new ones out there I haven't heard yet.

My favorite:

Chuck Norris isn't Lactose Intolerant, but he doesn't take any s--t from milk.
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  • olDave
    olDave Posts: 557 Member
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    Who is Chuck Norris?
  • pucenavel
    pucenavel Posts: 972 Member
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    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Norris

    and this thread is all about these...

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Norris_facts
  • RoseDarrett
    RoseDarrett Posts: 355 Member
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    When Chuck Norris was born,he slapped the nurse.Nobody slaps Chuck Norris.

    They found the cure for cancer,it's too bad Chuck Norris doesn't cry.

    Chuck Norris only believes in one element....surprise.

    There's heaps more but that's all I remember for now.
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    Some people wear Superman pajamas; Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

    If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be seconds away from death.
  • moustache_flavored_lube
    moustache_flavored_lube Posts: 849 Member
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    Chuck norris vacationed in the virgin islands this summer. Now they are just known as the islands
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
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    tumblr_m0gk85QRiW1qef5dbo1_500_zpsc95a8159.jpg
  • _noob_
    _noob_ Posts: 3,306 Member
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    Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris can speak Braille
  • awake4777
    awake4777 Posts: 190 Member
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    Who is Chuck Norris?
    Oh dear. He's old, don't worry about it.:flowerforyou:
  • RetroRob
    RetroRob Posts: 58
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    Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
  • MidwestAngel
    MidwestAngel Posts: 1,897 Member
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    Google: Where is chuck norris and click on I'm feeling lucky

    Here just to make it easier on you

    chucknorris_zpsb1f1f0aa.png
  • shinkalork
    shinkalork Posts: 815 Member
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    a workout one....

    When Chuck Norris does push ups, he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the Earth down
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
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    chuck-norris-meme_zpse5887deb.jpg
  • Yolanda_85
    Yolanda_85 Posts: 143 Member
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    Google: Where is chuck norris and click on I'm feeling lucky

    LMAO!!!
  • Spook_Nuke_Em
    Spook_Nuke_Em Posts: 408 Member
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    Chuck Norris has never gotten bronchitis.. Ain't nobody got time fa dat!
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
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    Google: Where is chuck norris and click on I'm feeling lucky

    just did it and LMAO awesome
  • Dee_84
    Dee_84 Posts: 431 Member
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    Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey, he chews bees.
  • Jocosase
    Jocosase Posts: 82 Member
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    I don't have a Chuck Norris line......but these are hillarious!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,704 Member
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    Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • apg2302
    apg2302 Posts: 667
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    Chuck Norris has sex with every woman on earth once a month, thus causing the menstrual cycle
  • musiche
    musiche Posts: 214 Member
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    Love this thread. Thanks for the laughs!

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