I feel like healthy living ruins my social life..

Options
taylorwaylor
taylorwaylor Posts: 417 Member
in Motivation and Support
I take things to the extreme and working for a good body is what i have been focusing on for awhile.... I have depression, but i feel like my goals are just making it all worse.... I am a young, and i used to be spontaneous and fun.... but now i feel like the opposite. And food seems to be a huge cause! I feel soooooooo bad if i eat something that is not extremely healthy... And i stay home a lot, while most people my age are out partying... I really need some advice of how to balance my social life and my health out!!!
«13

Replies

  • 30ismyyear
    30ismyyear Posts: 145 Member
    Options
    Perhaps you need to talk to more of a professional? With depression it is helpful anyway and it really seems likes it a deep-routed problem.

    But, you could just do active social things? Join a sport league, go to fitness classes, join a running group.
  • vanguardfitness
    vanguardfitness Posts: 720 Member
    Options
    Partying is over rated. Even when I was 18 I could never find enjoyment in going out every weekend and drinking ("partying"). You're not missing much (except a hangover), so I wouldn't consider living a healthier lifestyle to be "ruining".
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    Options
    edit to post on your feed since we're friends.
  • tuckerrj
    tuckerrj Posts: 1,453 Member
    Options
    You may have to "migrate" towards new friends. Now I have friends that I run with, ride bikes with, play golf with, go to the gym with, etc., instead of sitting around drinking and gettin' stupid. It's redefining "social life".
  • taylorwaylor
    taylorwaylor Posts: 417 Member
    Options
    Partying is over rated. Even when I was 18 I could never find enjoyment in going out every weekend and drinking ("partying"). You're not missing much (except a hangover), so I wouldn't consider living a healthier lifestyle to be "ruining".

    Ahh okay ha. And I already did go through a party phase and I pretty much did quit because it got boring... But i'm shy and alcohol makes me fun... So i feel like this is the only way to socialize. Plus i feel weird saying i dont want to drink... People make a big deal out of it :/
  • sleepytexan
    sleepytexan Posts: 3,138 Member
    Options
    I take things to the extreme and working for a good body is what i have been focusing on for awhile.... I have depression, but i feel like my goals are just making it all worse.... I am a young, and i used to be spontaneous and fun.... but now i feel like the opposite. And food seems to be a huge cause! I feel soooooooo bad if i eat something that is not extremely healthy... And i stay home a lot, while most people my age are out partying... I really need some advice of how to balance my social life and my health out!!!

    Take up social dancing - you can go out for salsa or west coast swing in most cities any night of the week. There are milongas everywhere for tango. Dancing is so fun, sexy, and a great workout. Serious dancers don't drink -- they dance.
  • taylorwaylor
    taylorwaylor Posts: 417 Member
    Options
    You may have to "migrate" towards new friends. Now I have friends that I run with, ride bikes with, play golf with, go to the gym with, etc., instead of sitting around drinking and gettin' stupid. It's redefining "social life".

    I agree!! I moved and am surrounded by new people.... Where i used to live, i was in the party group... And even here those are the people i seem to get to know easier... And my dad drinks soooo much, im just afraid i'll end up like him if i start drinking again.
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
    Options
    Never feel ashamed for taking care of yourself. If you are feeling this way, it won't hurt to talk to a counselor about it.

    Also, you might be surprised at how many friends want to be healthier too. When I invite friends to go to a Zumba class with me, or to come over for a healthy dinner, or just to workout in general, they usually accept the offer.

    Also, your working out and eating healthy can be spontaneous if you want. I know a lot of us here get caught up in calorie counting, but I personally don't do it anymore. I did it for a couple months, and it was really enlightening to learn about my food, but I can't plan out every bite of food and I can't workout on a regular schedule. That doesn't mean I can't take care of myself though. I go out to eat all the time, but I just choose some soup and salad instead of something heavy. I'm also not afraid to ask my friends to go for a walk with me when we chat.
  • joleenl
    joleenl Posts: 739 Member
    Options
    Go out and party but don't drink. That's what I do. Learn to have fun with out food and alcohol.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    Options
    You could always join a club or sport especially at school. Or take dance classes. There is always something to do that doesn't involve partying. Or if you want to party, go party. Go enjoy life, just be safe and happy. :]
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
    Options
    The only thing that ruins your social life is having children.
  • sassafrascas
    sassafrascas Posts: 191 Member
    Options
    You may have to "migrate" towards new friends. Now I have friends that I run with, ride bikes with, play golf with, go to the gym with, etc., instead of sitting around drinking and gettin' stupid. It's redefining "social life".

    ^ this! Amen i need some friends around the same fitness level to do those things with!
  • sassafrascas
    sassafrascas Posts: 191 Member
    Options
    Go out and party but don't drink. That's what I do. Learn to have fun with out food and alcohol.

    Love this too why does fun have to involve food or alcohol? that what I am working on too.
  • HappyHungryHealthy
    HappyHungryHealthy Posts: 121 Member
    Options
    I take things to the extreme and working for a good body is what i have been focusing on for awhile.... I have depression, but i feel like my goals are just making it all worse.... I am a young, and i used to be spontaneous and fun.... but now i feel like the opposite. And food seems to be a huge cause! I feel soooooooo bad if i eat something that is not extremely healthy... And i stay home a lot, while most people my age are out partying... I really need some advice of how to balance my social life and my health out!!!

    If I didn't know better I would say I posted this myself lol. You seem an awful lot like me. I suffered anorexia for most of my life so I understand where your coming from, as gaining weight has taken over my life to the point where I don't go out and I too am young. I know how difficult it is, but you can't let food take over your life like I have, go out and have fun if you want, as long as you eat healthy during the week then doing what you want at the weekend shouldn't have a lasting effect. I'm learning to eat healthy but from Friday, to Monday I eat healthy and drink what I like and haven't gained weight yet, I find having a few bad days I tend to lose weight easier, but I guess everyone is different.
  • debramcconchie
    debramcconchie Posts: 1
    Options
    Hi Taylorwaylor. Don't get to disheartened, as I weight 104kg (228.8lbs) and I have had depression for 12 years now and am only just realizing that I want to live. I found this site great as instead of writing down everything, and then working it out, the computer does it and keeps records as well. Anyway back to the social life. Don't let anything stop you going out. You need to enjoy yourself. I am eating normally and have still managed to lose a little so changes must come in small steps but you need to take them no one else can for you. So tell yourself you are going to do it and get yourself out there even if you have to give yourself a huge push you will love yourself for doing it.:love:
  • atamrowski
    atamrowski Posts: 417 Member
    Options
    The only thing that ruins your social life is having children.

    Your social life becomes reading books, coloring Dora pages, and building Legos. On a Saturday night. Watching Spongebob and ready to go to bed by 9pm. That's how we roll over here.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Options
    Go party if you want to party. I don't smoke, drink, or use drugs and i still have a great time with my friends while losing weight. Here's the big tip: stop worrying about eating "healthy" and just eat. Hit your calorie goals on most days and don't worry about anything else. Going over on a day or two won't kill you, especially if you have a long way to go
  • RandiLandCHANGED
    RandiLandCHANGED Posts: 630 Member
    Options
    I still went out, I just got teased for not drinking. I haven't drank in years and don't plan to start. However, this means I have nothing to blame my awful dance skills on. One of the best parts is that you can remember how stupid people were and they have no clue :)
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
    Options
    Partying is over rated. Even when I was 18 I could never find enjoyment in going out every weekend and drinking ("partying"). You're not missing much (except a hangover), so I wouldn't consider living a healthier lifestyle to be "ruining".

    Ahh okay ha. And I already did go through a party phase and I pretty much did quit because it got boring... But i'm shy and alcohol makes me fun... So i feel like this is the only way to socialize. Plus i feel weird saying i dont want to drink... People make a big deal out of it :/

    I can totally relate to that. I am shy. I can't get on the dance floor without a couple of drinks. Although I didn't get into fitness and that until I was older. By that time I was already pretty much done the bar scene.
    I also get the not wanting to get in the habit of drinking too much
    I agree with finding a group that have similar ideas as you. My running/triathlon group has done a lot for my social life. They are a great, fun group. We have a beer night after swimming or after a run (like today's half marathon ). We even organize a running house crawl. However, you are as likely to find as many people drinking as not. There is no pressure. No one bats an eye at a water bottle over a beer bottle.
    But like Davpaul said, you can still have a night out. It's about balance. It can be hard to find but it's possible. We still have a meal out once a week. I even have a couple of drinks now and then.

    ETA - I did not realize your age.
  • tsh0ck
    tsh0ck Posts: 1,970 Member
    Options
    I take things to the extreme and working for a good body is what i have been focusing on for awhile.... I have depression, but i feel like my goals are just making it all worse.... I am a young, and i used to be spontaneous and fun.... but now i feel like the opposite. And food seems to be a huge cause! I feel soooooooo bad if i eat something that is not extremely healthy... And i stay home a lot, while most people my age are out partying... I really need some advice of how to balance my social life and my health out!!!

    the problem, I think, is that you are classifying foods as healthy or not. the only truly unhealthy food is one eaten in excess.

Categories