When someone complains about being fat...

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n2thenight24
n2thenight24 Posts: 1,651 Member
in Chit-Chat
Scenario: You're talking to a friend/coworker/acquaintance, who starts complaining about being overweight. How they hate that they can never wear a bikini, will never be able to show off their bodies etc. This isn't one of those skinny people fishing for compliments, this is a truly overweight person. Do you offer advice and share your experience? Is that rude? How long do you need to know said person before you can say, hey; I understand what you're going through, and I can offer you tools to help. Since basically, saying these things means you agree with them, are you risking the friendship? What's your opinion?

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  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,026 Member
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    There is a pretty easy way of handling.

    "Yeah I know how you feel. I was overweight as well until I took control of things. I did xyz and used xyz to help me stay on track and built a support network to keep me motivated. If you're interested, I wouldn't mind helping you out with this."
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,026 Member
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    Oh, and also reinforce the importance of having a good body image of yourself.
  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
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    I think it's a fine line. I can remember myself saying those things before, I can remember feeling helpless and ugly. But I made the push on my own (with a nudge from my husband) and I think I may have seen any attempt at 'advice' to seem rude. You know this person, though, so you'd be best to judge if they'd take offense to anything you might say to them.

    Maybe encourage them to get into similar things to you? Tell them that you've felt that way before, but because of sites like this/eating better/working out you don't feel that way anymore?

    Good luck~!
  • Momf3boys
    Momf3boys Posts: 1,637 Member
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    Totally tell them about my journey...encourage them to make changes and tell them that they can wear a bikini if they make life changes. I would offer support and ask them if they wanted to work out with me. I would also tell them about the health risks of being overweight and it doesn't matter how long I know them.
  • Game8
    Game8 Posts: 442
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    I have probably never in my life asked anyone for help regarding fitness/ exercise. This is probably the same reason that I never offer advice unless someone asks specific questions and I sense they're genuine and serious. All information is there for free and anyone who cares can find it. Diet, training, nutrition, supplements, etc.. anyone who has access to an internet connection has no excuse for being ignorant.
  • CheriLMT
    CheriLMT Posts: 220 Member
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    I wish that there would have been someone there a long time ago to encourage me....I just my mom and dad yo-yo diet their whole lives and that is what I have done for the last 5 years...this time I am going for full on

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