Sabotaged by microorganisms

BurtHuttz

I'm sick with some kind of flu.
I've been running 10 miles a week for months, and I started lifting as well three weeks ago.
I can tell there's just no juice in my muscles; I can barely do unweighted squats.
Fourth day of uselessness. I'm full of this terrible nervous energy that wants to go kick *kitten* but I have no mitochondrial energy, or whatever, with which to kick said *kitten*.

WHAT DO I DO???

_noob_

Just break up

1ConcreteGirl

Mitochondria is a myth.

Try CO2 supplements, I have heard of them.

iulia_maddie

So..microorganisms don't fit your macros?

Cr01502

JUice cleanse

Obviously . . . .

MireyGal76

curl up in the fetal position and pray for death.

it won't work.

sunsnstatheart

If I can't see 'em, then I don't believe in 'em! Stop your whining!

SueSlick

Seriously...you need to take actual rest time. Why continue half-cocked?

MireyGal76

or maybe an enema. I hear those are lots of fun.
And you'll strengthen your quads from all the standing and sitting you'll be doing.

BrettPGH

You are a weak man who has been defeated by the tiniest of creatures. They don't even lift.

_SABOTEUR_

I'm sick with some kind of flu.
I've been running 10 miles a week for months, and I started lifting as well three weeks ago.
I can tell there's just no juice in my muscles; I can barely do unweighted squats.
Fourth day of uselessness. I'm full of this terrible nervous energy that wants to go kick *kitten* but I have no mitochondrial energy, or whatever, with which to kick said *kitten*.

WHAT DO I DO???

If you can't kick *kitten*, fondle *kitten*.

lacurandera1

Just let your wife kick *kitten* for you. :laugh:

YoungDoc2B

Broscience. Everyone knows that Mitochondrial energy doesn't fuel your workouts. Silly rabit....

AngryDiet

or maybe an enema. I hear those are lots of fun.
And you'll strengthen your quads from all the standing and sitting you'll be doing.

Yes, a coffee one.

Krys_140

Sleep. Chicken soup. Kick all the a$$es.

lacurandera1

Seriously...you need to take actual rest time. Why continue half-cocked?

Agreed. Full c*ck or none.

Yanicka1

You are a weak man who has been defeated by the tiniest of creatures. They don't even lift.

This

Admiral_Derp

stumblinthrulife

You obviously need a ten day mastercleanse. It flushes all the microbes out of your body, along with the toxins.

trogalicious

poptart enema.

RoseKatet

poptart enema.

THIS!! Its my favorite

BurtHuttz

Wow. This place is really supportive. Thank you all for all of these suggestions. I'll go brew a pot of coffee and start warming up the poptarts now. I guess I'll end up kicking some *kitten* today after all!!

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

I'm sick with some kind of flu.
I've been running 10 miles a week for months, and I started lifting as well three weeks ago.
I can tell there's just no juice in my muscles; I can barely do unweighted squats.
Fourth day of uselessness. I'm full of this terrible nervous energy that wants to go kick *kitten* but I have no mitochondrial energy, or whatever, with which to kick said *kitten*.

WHAT DO I DO???

As a member of the healthcare industry, I can tell you that when we have a patient that leaves the hospital and they have had a nasty microorganism, all the surfaces need to be cleaned with special cleaners. I have a tub of dispatch wipes right here on my desk, and you should see how many microorganisms this shtuff kills. It kills 99.9% of bacteria, viruses, &fungi in the first minute. It can kill [C. diff in 5 minutes.

So, I'll tell you the secret. The active ingredient in these bad boys is bleach. So, here is my advice to you. By a gallon of bleach. Drink the first half and immediately turn around and give yourself the other half bottle per rectum (enema). That should take care of any pesky organisms (or life energy) you may have floating around in your body.

Would you like to pay your copay now, or should I bill you? Also, I need a copy of your insurance card.

SueSlick

even Arnold knows

_SABOTEUR_

Hand your penis in on the way out.

AngryDiet

Raspberry ketones.

Cr01502

Seriously...you need to take actual rest time. Why continue half-cocked?

Agreed. Full c*ck or none.

I third this.

Heading out half cocked can put you in dangerously embarrassing situations.

KANGOOJUMPS

i can give you some juice.

LiftAllThePizzas

Flu + Squats = Stinky Britches

BlackStarDeceiver

Seriously...you need to take actual rest time. Why continue half-cocked?

So just the tip?

GiddyupTim

OP, don't listen to these drastic suggestions. these people are not your friends. they just wanna watch.
Drink a boatload of coffee. I do it even day and I can do all kinds of stuff.
Up until fairly recently, caffeine was the only 'proven' performance enhancing drug, though it has always been pretty clear that steroids make stuff happen.