Okay, I HAVE HAD IT!! (help please)

mrslehan2013

I need someone to start holding me accountable for working out and eating right. Whether it is over MFP or e-mail or text, I don't care! I want this so bad but I suffer from binge eating. My fiance doesn't understand or support me. I try to make something healthy and he eats pizza...I try so hard to resist. So I'm looking for someone on the side hahah.

weird_me2

I'm not great at supporting others, but I do want to recommend that you work on whatever leads you to binge eating and the binge eating even before you work on working out or "eating right". Often, trying to go too hard or changing a bunch of things at once can actually trigger binge eating and make the situation worse.

I highly recommned the book "the Beck Diet Solution". It is not a diet book, it teaches a cognitive behavioral therapy approach to weight loss. It has 6 weeks worth of daily exercises to help you work through some issues. It does not tackle the root emotional issues that may be causing your binge eating, but it teaches you to respond in a healthy way to urges to eat or over eat.

I've worked through the book a few times in the last year and I think that many of the exercises have helped me lost the weight I have lost, and, more imporantly, not gain it all back and then some when I hit rough patches. I still occasionally struggle with the urges to binge and eat for emotional reasons, but I have still managed to get back on track and not beat myself up when they have happened.

If you do decide to get the book, I strongly urge you to do everything with an open mind and be brutally honest with yourself. That's the only way to get anywhere. I think I owned the book for at least 3 years before I really put the effort in to doing all the exercises no matter how stupid they seemed. I wasn't successful at losing and maintaining a loss during those 3 years...wonder of wonder, now that I've worked through the CBT exercises, I've seen a lot of success.

beejelblor

I have found that my co-worker is my best accountability. We have become... (overly maybe)... open about everything we eat, do, get tempted by, etc. My boyfriend is totally my shoulder devil as well because we want to have fun and enjoy life, so I needed to find someone I see every day to keep me grounded. Do you have any coworkers you can chat with?

dorianaldyn

MFP is an awesome place to come for support and advice. For all the struggles you are going through, guaranteed you'll find someone on here that has had a similar struggle. But, having said that, none of us can reach through our screen and take that pizza off your plate. YOU are the only person that can control what you eat and how much you exercise. You have to do this for YOU. Plan ahead, pre-log your meals, don't wait until you're starving to eat. If you get home without a meal planned and you're starving and there's a hot pizza right there - it would take super power strength to resist it. That's why it's on you to plan ahead and be mindful of what you're doing.

Also, throughout this process, my husband regularly eats candy, giant portions, etc. in front of me - stuff I don't have room for in my calorie budget. I don't get mad at him for it and I don't feel that he isn't being supportive. Just because I'm limiting my caloric intake doesn't mean he has to. Just because I'm avoiding certain foods, doesn't mean he has to. Why should I force what I'm doing on him? That would be rather selfish of me.

Dulcefresh

I was having the same issue... Im on a weightloss journey with my hubby and sister.....My hubby exercises but some days he will try to convince me to eat bad things... for example,, vday he said I want to take you out to dinner to the buffet ... I had to channel all my strength to say no.... add me I will be ur diet police and you can like my facebook page for added support https://www.facebook.com/pages/FromFatttoFab/180437782086454?ref=stream#

supjamie

I am in the same boat as you. I am a binge eater and my husband is a pizza junkie and snack food junkie too. It makes it so hard to make it worse he is skinny! Ugh.

nachodman

Hey.
PUT DOWN THAT DONUT! LOL
Seriously, the key to success in this realm is to ask yourself why you are doing this? If the answer is not for your own succes, then you may be struggling with meeting someone else's goals. If you are doing this for yourself, you need to make sure you will succeed and you can start by making a commitment to yourself, not your clothes, your fiance etc. but to YOU. Now, once you determine you are doing this for the right reasons, you can set a goal. To get results you never had, you need to do things you have never done...eat right, exercise ...etc. if you do eat pizza, WHO CARES! Just get out and walk/run/bike/swim etc, burn the extra calories, or make sure start with a deficit and fill in if you feel the need, otherwise, that is just extra calories you burned and extra weight you will lose...I am for keeping you accountable but you need to be honest with yourself first...
the drive and motivation HAS TO COME FROM WITHIN YOU, not externally and no amount of texting, e-mail etc will hold you as accountable as you can hold yourself to...I am for texting you and adding you to the list if you'd like...pm me!
Nacho