Overeaters: How to Love Yourself

peterdt

FRIDAY, AUGUST 17, 2012 | POSTED BY DR. GOULD



Overeaters, do you keep telling yourself that when you lose weight you'll finally love yourself? Do you think it's completely acceptable to reject your body in its current state? If you're plagued with thoughts about wishing you looked differently, read on.

A female journalist, who has written beauty articles for Allure, Glamour and Cosmo said, "I always thought I was just one haircut away from being beautiful. If I could only find the "right" haircut, lipstick or mascara I'd be a different person."

Overeaters do the same thing with their weight. If I was just a size (fill in the blank), if I didn't have cellulite, if I could only lose five, fifteen or fifty-pounds, I'd finally accept myself. However, these goals often become more and more elusive begging us to chase them to the point of exhaustion.

It's all too common for overeaters to approach dieting and exercise from a place of self-hatred. And it's these negative feelings that propel us to "deprive" ourselves. No wonder, then, we come to resent taking care of ourselves, particularly when we've made it into a form of punishment.

When we accept ourselves, however, we're more likely to have the energy required to take loving actions towards our bodies - important actions like eating well and exercising.

It may seem like semantics, but the perspective of your approach really matters. And it all starts with accepting yourself exactly as you are TODAY - even if you have wrinkles, and even if you have rolls.

This change of perspective for overeaters can sound easier said than done, but it's a necessary part of taking care of yourself for the rest of your life.

This is why dealing with your own self-doubts is a big part of both the Shrink Yourself book and the online program.

3 Simple Ways You Can Start Accepting Yourself Today:
Writing down three things you did well, each night.

Asking your friends or family to share what they love about you.

Contemplating the qualities you possess and admire in yourself (such as joy, radiance, intelligence, fun, reliability) and letting those qualities flow out of you more freely.

We have the false belief that if we can only change our thinking, then we'll finally be able to have the "willpower" to change our actions. That's an admirable first step, however we have to work it from both ends.

When we change our actions, our way of thinking inevitably changes. Take loving actions towards yourself and you'll find yourself accepting yourself more and more. Anything from putting yourself to bed early, to drawing a bath for yourself, to setting a boundary with someone who always elicits bad feelings in you.

Overeaters, you are not fifteen-pounds from fabulous; you're already fabulous. Self-acceptance starts now!

peterdt

From my experience, my weight loss hasn't done much for myself esteem. I feel the same, just i weigh less. Nothing really changed. You build these big great big vision of what it would be at a specific weight, or in certain clothes. I wear that clothes I always wanted to wear, i hit those goals. Those dates (being a specific weight for an event). Truth is, there is some temporary joy, but it doesn't last.

Christmas, I showed up at my mom's, family was there, I was at my goal weight for Christmas. First thing i heard from my uncle "Where did you leave it?" I said, "what?" He said, "you're stomach, you lost a lot of weight.. What have you been doing?" I told him, "Exercising and diet." He asked me a few questions of my methods, we talked about it. That was it, nothing else was said. Life moves on.

So don't think if you're at a specific weight all these magical things will happen. I good quote someone mentioned the other day, "Hating yourself isn't motivation. Loving yourself is." (paraphrasing of course)

really? what you have done is a huge accomplishment. I would hope you feel a great amount of pride in what you have done my friend! If you do feel any pride it is justified!