Binge drinking?

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  • NanaWubbie
    NanaWubbie Posts: 248 Member
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    As I became healthier, I found that some of my friends were not the friends I thought they were. I found new friends that were more supportive of my goals. I have no regrets.
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    As someone who was 20 not that long ago, believe me when I say that at the time it might FEEL like everyone your age is drinking, but that's not true. The people they aren't just aren't out at bars/club. :tongue: You just have to start looking at new places for like-minded people, like meeting people at gyms, get a job, join a run club, etc.

    But until then, just drink water and diet soda all night and no one will care after they get drunk. Dance the night away and have fun burning those calories and not having a hangover the next day like your friends! :drinker:

    I start a new gym in April, so I'll be able to look there. I have a job, but everyone in my campaign drinks loads too, haha. Hopefully I'll make new friends soon, and the ones I do have will just need to adjust. :smile:
  • DoxieLove10612
    DoxieLove10612 Posts: 145 Member
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck

    I'm not underage... I live in Northern Ireland. The legal drinking age in the UK is 18.
    My friends who enjoy drinking are not losers.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
    Not helpful in the slightest. Judgmental, yes.
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
    Not helpful in the slightest. Judgmental, yes.

    Agreed. And I am not underage, as I said in my last post, the legal drinking age in the UK is 18. Not everyone on this site is American.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
    Not helpful in the slightest. Judgmental, yes.

    Agreed. And I am not underage, as I said in my last post, the legal drinking age in the UK is 18. Not everyone on this site is American.
    Yup. I knew you weren't because you referred to "units" of alcohol you consumed. :smile:
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
    Not helpful in the slightest. Judgmental, yes.

    Agreed. And I am not underage, as I said in my last post, the legal drinking age in the UK is 18. Not everyone on this site is American.
    Yup. I knew you weren't because you referred to "units" of alcohol you consumed. :smile:

    Ooh, do they not count units in the US?
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    Underage and admittedly openly about being a binge drinker is not a good sign. Put the booze down and find friends who don't partake. I used to binge drink and cleaned up. Yes I lost friends and felt like a lost lamb for a month but then decided they're losers who can't afford to do anything extra like go on vacations bc they spend all their money on something the will urinate in 20 minutes. Your liver is more important than that good luck
    Not helpful in the slightest. Judgmental, yes.

    Agreed. And I am not underage, as I said in my last post, the legal drinking age in the UK is 18. Not everyone on this site is American.
    Yup. I knew you weren't because you referred to "units" of alcohol you consumed. :smile:

    Ooh, do they not count units in the US?
    The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".

    Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".

    Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.
    :laugh:
    Not all, but a few were probably freaking.
  • jus_in_bello
    jus_in_bello Posts: 326 Member
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    I get what you all mean about finding friends who support it. My best friends do support my choices. But still, literally everyone my age seems to go out drinking every weekend. If I go out with them and don't drink it annoys them, like maybe they feel self-conscious being drunk when I'm staying sober? I don't know.

    Although I have to say, not only is my waist agreeing with my choices, but my wallet too, haha! :laugh:

    I'm your age. I go out a few times a month. But thats about it.
    You can find friends who don't need that lifestyle to survive... Trust Me! :)

    I was not drinking that much at your age either (a whole 4 years ago) and I had friends who didn't drink every weekend too, we also didn't harass people about their drinking when we did drink.

    Find a hobby, a group, whatever and make some friends, people who won't support your choice to drink less aren't going to last for long, isn't an expensive habit anyway?
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".
    Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.
    :laugh:
    Not all, but a few were probably freaking.
    Well, women aren't supposed to have more than 14 units a week over here, which I do if I have a whole half bottle, but I rarely do anymore. But we're not supposed to have more than 3 a day either, so it is still definitely binge drinking.

    Just gonna have to find like minded friends, I guess. But I think it's a binge drinking culture in the UK, which makes it a bit more difficult.
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    I was not drinking that much at your age either (a whole 4 years ago) and I had friends who didn't drink every weekend too, we also didn't harass people about their drinking when we did drink.

    Find a hobby, a group, whatever and make some friends, people who won't support your choice to drink less aren't going to last for long, isn't an expensive habit anyway?
    Oh, I would never harass people about their drinking. What gave you the impression I did?
  • kfesta52
    kfesta52 Posts: 98 Member
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    You sound like a very sweet, smart, and thoughful girl (sorry, I feel like your old auntie or something calling you a girl). You are ahead of your peers in getting smart about your life and your health; be proud of yourself. I hope you can find some other friends that want to get out and do things other than drink! I think there's some good advice on here for how to stay in the scene and not feel too obvious. And maybe as you enjoy your every-other drink out with your friends, you'll find some new friends that are actually out doing the same thing you are. :)
  • gauchogirl
    gauchogirl Posts: 467 Member
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    I know it sounds flippant to say "get new friends," but I can say for sure that REAL friends would not 1) make you feel bad about your new choices or 2) encourage you to deviate from your new, healthier lifestyle. I know this because I rarely drink (so rarely that you could say I don't drink -- maybe once a year or so I have a couple drinks socially), but ALL my friends do and they accept me the way I am. Even if they resist at first, a TRUE friend cares MORE about YOUR WELFARE (as determined by you -- "I don't want to drink as often) than about THEIR PERCEPTION OF FUN. They are asking you to respect their choices (they don't want to go bowling, etc., and expect you to be ok with that) but are not respecting yours (less drinking.) That is not how a TRUE friend behaves. In all honesty, we all have "types" of friends: the drinking buddies, the gym buddies, the co-worker buddies, etc. Maybe you all became friends around drinking, which was fine - WAS - for the drinking you. But now there is a more-healthy-you (good for YOU!!) and it might be necessary (although uncomfortable? painful?) to start finding more appropriate friends for the NEW you. It's part of life. I have three daughters your age and I would say the same thing to them.

    edited to add: I used to binge drink, a lot, like you describe, at the same age. And yes, my friends then did too. Eventually, though those friends become more distant because the activity is the real bond and not the friendship. The friends that remain, the ones I've had for 15+ years, are the real ones. You'll sort it out, you're young, but like lots of things in life, it involves growing pains! Good luck!
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    You sound like a very sweet, smart, and thoughful girl (sorry, I feel like your old auntie or something calling you a girl). You are ahead of your peers in getting smart about your life and your health; be proud of yourself. I hope you can find some other friends that want to get out and do things other than drink! I think there's some good advice on here for how to stay in the scene and not feel too obvious. And maybe as you enjoy your every-other drink out with your friends, you'll find some new friends that are actually out doing the same thing you are. :)
    Don't, it's nice to be called a girl, haha! I really do appreciate all the lovely advice, even if a few people seem to be a bit judgemental.
    I'm quite shy, so it's difficult to make new friends, but I'm working on it! :happy:
  • DragonflyF15
    DragonflyF15 Posts: 437 Member
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    It probably makes your friends feel awkward around you not drinking cause it makes them perhaps have to take a look at their own drinking habits and they might not want to look in their own habits. Some people just get jolly and think of getting wasted together as bonding. If you love your friends too much to give them up, just go up to the bar to order your drinks and get a lime added in to a spritzer, cranberry juice, 7up and ask for it in a glass with a stir...I find that most will just assume you are drinking an alcoholic bev and back off. Binge drinking, esp among 20somethings is common here too. Guilty myself during that time...then 30's it got harder to recover and 40's...not worth two days, but usually once a year I remind myself why I don't over do it on drinking :)
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    I know it sounds flippant to say "get new friends," but I can say for sure that REAL friends would not 1) make you feel bad about your new choices or 2) encourage you to deviate from your new, healthier lifestyle. I know this because I rarely drink (so rarely that you could say I don't drink -- maybe once a year or so I have a couple drinks socially), but ALL my friends do and they accept me the way I am. Even if they resist at first, a TRUE friend cares MORE about YOUR WELFARE (as determined by you -- "I don't want to drink as often) than about THEIR PERCEPTION OF FUN. They are asking you to respect their choices (they don't want to go bowling, etc., and expect you to be ok with that) but are not respecting yours (less drinking.) That is not how a TRUE friend behaves. In all honesty, we all have "types" of friends: the drinking buddies, the gym buddies, the co-worker buddies, etc. Maybe you all became friends around drinking, which was fine - WAS - for the drinking you. But now there is a more-healthy-you (good for YOU!!) and it might be necessary (although uncomfortable? painful?) to start finding more appropriate friends for the NEW you. It's part of life. I have three daughters your age and I would say the same thing to them. Good luck!
    I get what you're saying. And it is true that I made most of my friends when I was still a big drinker. As I've said a couple times, I do feel like it is a bit of a binge drinking culture over here, but I'm absolutely positive that I can make new like-minded friends. Not everyone drinks loads, I just have to find them.
  • rachaelheaney
    rachaelheaney Posts: 116
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    It probably makes your friends feel awkward around you not drinking cause it makes them perhaps have to take a look at their own drinking habits and they might not want to look in their own habits. Some people just get jolly and think of getting wasted together as bonding. If you love your friends too much to give them up, just go up to the bar to order your drinks and get a lime added in to a spritzer, cranberry juice, 7up and ask for it in a glass with a stir...I find that most will just assume you are drinking an alcoholic bev and back off. Binge drinking, esp among 20somethings is common here too. Guilty myself during that time...then 30's it got harder to recover and 40's...not worth two days, but usually once a year I remind myself why I don't over do it on drinking :)
    I didn't even think of that! One girl has actually started working out with me and drinking less, so maybe that is it, I'm making them look at their own drinking habits unintentionally.

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