Binge drinking?
Replies
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:laugh:The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".
Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.
Not all, but a few were probably freaking.0 -
I get what you all mean about finding friends who support it. My best friends do support my choices. But still, literally everyone my age seems to go out drinking every weekend. If I go out with them and don't drink it annoys them, like maybe they feel self-conscious being drunk when I'm staying sober? I don't know.
Although I have to say, not only is my waist agreeing with my choices, but my wallet too, haha! :laugh:
I'm your age. I go out a few times a month. But thats about it.
You can find friends who don't need that lifestyle to survive... Trust Me!
I was not drinking that much at your age either (a whole 4 years ago) and I had friends who didn't drink every weekend too, we also didn't harass people about their drinking when we did drink.
Find a hobby, a group, whatever and make some friends, people who won't support your choice to drink less aren't going to last for long, isn't an expensive habit anyway?0 -
Well, women aren't supposed to have more than 14 units a week over here, which I do if I have a whole half bottle, but I rarely do anymore. But we're not supposed to have more than 3 a day either, so it is still definitely binge drinking.
:laugh:
Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".
Not all, but a few were probably freaking.
Just gonna have to find like minded friends, I guess. But I think it's a binge drinking culture in the UK, which makes it a bit more difficult.0 -
Oh, I would never harass people about their drinking. What gave you the impression I did?I was not drinking that much at your age either (a whole 4 years ago) and I had friends who didn't drink every weekend too, we also didn't harass people about their drinking when we did drink.
Find a hobby, a group, whatever and make some friends, people who won't support your choice to drink less aren't going to last for long, isn't an expensive habit anyway?0 -
You sound like a very sweet, smart, and thoughful girl (sorry, I feel like your old auntie or something calling you a girl). You are ahead of your peers in getting smart about your life and your health; be proud of yourself. I hope you can find some other friends that want to get out and do things other than drink! I think there's some good advice on here for how to stay in the scene and not feel too obvious. And maybe as you enjoy your every-other drink out with your friends, you'll find some new friends that are actually out doing the same thing you are. 0
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I know it sounds flippant to say "get new friends," but I can say for sure that REAL friends would not 1) make you feel bad about your new choices or 2) encourage you to deviate from your new, healthier lifestyle. I know this because I rarely drink (so rarely that you could say I don't drink -- maybe once a year or so I have a couple drinks socially), but ALL my friends do and they accept me the way I am. Even if they resist at first, a TRUE friend cares MORE about YOUR WELFARE (as determined by you -- "I don't want to drink as often) than about THEIR PERCEPTION OF FUN. They are asking you to respect their choices (they don't want to go bowling, etc., and expect you to be ok with that) but are not respecting yours (less drinking.) That is not how a TRUE friend behaves. In all honesty, we all have "types" of friends: the drinking buddies, the gym buddies, the co-worker buddies, etc. Maybe you all became friends around drinking, which was fine - WAS - for the drinking you. But now there is a more-healthy-you (good for YOU!!) and it might be necessary (although uncomfortable? painful?) to start finding more appropriate friends for the NEW you. It's part of life. I have three daughters your age and I would say the same thing to them.
edited to add: I used to binge drink, a lot, like you describe, at the same age. And yes, my friends then did too. Eventually, though those friends become more distant because the activity is the real bond and not the friendship. The friends that remain, the ones I've had for 15+ years, are the real ones. You'll sort it out, you're young, but like lots of things in life, it involves growing pains! Good luck!0 -
Don't, it's nice to be called a girl, haha! I really do appreciate all the lovely advice, even if a few people seem to be a bit judgemental.You sound like a very sweet, smart, and thoughful girl (sorry, I feel like your old auntie or something calling you a girl). You are ahead of your peers in getting smart about your life and your health; be proud of yourself. I hope you can find some other friends that want to get out and do things other than drink! I think there's some good advice on here for how to stay in the scene and not feel too obvious. And maybe as you enjoy your every-other drink out with your friends, you'll find some new friends that are actually out doing the same thing you are.
I'm quite shy, so it's difficult to make new friends, but I'm working on it! :happy:0 -
It probably makes your friends feel awkward around you not drinking cause it makes them perhaps have to take a look at their own drinking habits and they might not want to look in their own habits. Some people just get jolly and think of getting wasted together as bonding. If you love your friends too much to give them up, just go up to the bar to order your drinks and get a lime added in to a spritzer, cranberry juice, 7up and ask for it in a glass with a stir...I find that most will just assume you are drinking an alcoholic bev and back off. Binge drinking, esp among 20somethings is common here too. Guilty myself during that time...then 30's it got harder to recover and 40's...not worth two days, but usually once a year I remind myself why I don't over do it on drinking 0
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I get what you're saying. And it is true that I made most of my friends when I was still a big drinker. As I've said a couple times, I do feel like it is a bit of a binge drinking culture over here, but I'm absolutely positive that I can make new like-minded friends. Not everyone drinks loads, I just have to find them.I know it sounds flippant to say "get new friends," but I can say for sure that REAL friends would not 1) make you feel bad about your new choices or 2) encourage you to deviate from your new, healthier lifestyle. I know this because I rarely drink (so rarely that you could say I don't drink -- maybe once a year or so I have a couple drinks socially), but ALL my friends do and they accept me the way I am. Even if they resist at first, a TRUE friend cares MORE about YOUR WELFARE (as determined by you -- "I don't want to drink as often) than about THEIR PERCEPTION OF FUN. They are asking you to respect their choices (they don't want to go bowling, etc., and expect you to be ok with that) but are not respecting yours (less drinking.) That is not how a TRUE friend behaves. In all honesty, we all have "types" of friends: the drinking buddies, the gym buddies, the co-worker buddies, etc. Maybe you all became friends around drinking, which was fine - WAS - for the drinking you. But now there is a more-healthy-you (good for YOU!!) and it might be necessary (although uncomfortable? painful?) to start finding more appropriate friends for the NEW you. It's part of life. I have three daughters your age and I would say the same thing to them. Good luck!0 -
I didn't even think of that! One girl has actually started working out with me and drinking less, so maybe that is it, I'm making them look at their own drinking habits unintentionally.It probably makes your friends feel awkward around you not drinking cause it makes them perhaps have to take a look at their own drinking habits and they might not want to look in their own habits. Some people just get jolly and think of getting wasted together as bonding. If you love your friends too much to give them up, just go up to the bar to order your drinks and get a lime added in to a spritzer, cranberry juice, 7up and ask for it in a glass with a stir...I find that most will just assume you are drinking an alcoholic bev and back off. Binge drinking, esp among 20somethings is common here too. Guilty myself during that time...then 30's it got harder to recover and 40's...not worth two days, but usually once a year I remind myself why I don't over do it on drinking0 -
It probably makes your friends feel awkward around you not drinking cause it makes them perhaps have to take a look at their own drinking habits and they might not want to look in their own habits. Some people just get jolly and think of getting wasted together as bonding. If you love your friends too much to give them up, just go up to the bar to order your drinks and get a lime added in to a spritzer, cranberry juice, 7up and ask for it in a glass with a stir...I find that most will just assume you are drinking an alcoholic bev and back off. Binge drinking, esp among 20somethings is common here too. Guilty myself during that time...then 30's it got harder to recover and 40's...not worth two days, but usually once a year I remind myself why I don't over do it on drinking
Perfectly said! About once a year is all I care to remind myself that "2 days to recover" is not worth it!0 -
Social drinking is hard to avoid. I am in NZ and we have a very drinking-based culture.
Sure - if I found a group of anti-alcohol religious folk I might be fine, or start hanging with super health focused gym bunnies - but that is not me.
Even workplace socialising is drinking based. The Boss brought tequila shots for everyone on 24th December. We have workplace drinks every Friday with beer and wine provided, in an office where there are no tea bags.
I tried bringing in my own stuff or drinking water to be there for the getting-to-know-each-other aspect but it makes people nervous.
I admit to responding to peer pressure. I choose that over being a complete social out-cast. Even so, I don't drink as much so I am not invited out as often as others.
Good luck OP. Sorry to say it may not be an age thing.0 -
It's exactly the same here at work! Our incentives are all alcohol. If I meet my targets, I get a bottle of wine. I don't want wine! All work nights out revolve around drinking too.Social drinking is hard to avoid. I am in NZ and we have a very drinking-based culture.
Sure - if I found a group of anti-alcohol religious folk I might be fine, or start hanging with super health focused gym bunnies - but that is not me.
Even workplace socialising is drinking based. The Boss brought tequila shots for everyone on 24th December. We have workplace drinks every Friday with beer and wine provided, in an office where there are no tea bags.
I tried bringing in my own stuff or drinking water to be there for the getting-to-know-each-other aspect but it makes people nervous.
I admit to responding to peer pressure. I choose that over being a complete social out-cast. Even so, I don't drink as much so I am not invited out as often as others.
Good luck OP. Sorry to say it may not be an age thing.0 -
I used to hang out with my friends at least multiple times a week. Now that everyone got old enough to go out and drink, I probably hang out with them multiple times in a span of months. I never could get into drinking. Always dwell on waking up with a headache or something...not to mention the last time I seriously drank, I overdid it and had to camp around a toilet all night because of nonstop vomiting lol. Too many bottles of madd dogg 20/20.0
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I actually tried the vodka diet once..... I lost 2 weeks!!!0
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I used to hang out with my friends at least multiple times a week. Now that everyone got old enough to go out and drink, I probably hang out with them multiple times in a span of months. I never could get into drinking. Always dwell on waking up with a headache or something...not to mention the last time I seriously drank, I overdid it and had to camp around a toilet all night because of nonstop vomiting lol. Too many bottles of madd dogg 20/20.
Oh, that stuff is ridic! My friend ordered some on the internet, I tried it and hated it, haha! It's kinda like a drink called Buckfast that everyone over here drinks. Cheap and with a high alcohol content, haha. :laugh:0 -
I actually tried the vodka diet once..... I lost 2 weeks!!!
:laugh: :laugh:
"I'm on a vodka diet, so far lost 3 days, 2 mates, 1 dog and my house keys."0 -
True friends support one another. If they refuse to then find some that will. :-)0
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I get what you all mean about finding friends who support it. My best friends do support my choices. But still, literally everyone my age seems to go out drinking every weekend. If I go out with them and don't drink it annoys them, like maybe they feel self-conscious being drunk when I'm staying sober? I don't know.
Although I have to say, not only is my waist agreeing with my choices, but my wallet too, haha! :laugh:
I'm your age. I go out a few times a month. But thats about it.
You can find friends who don't need that lifestyle to survive... Trust Me!
I;m 23 and don't drink anymore (well I've been having wine as a de-stresser lately lol but that's a different story) I haven't really drank to got drunk in a long time and for a while stopped drinking all together. I didn't really tell anyone that I wasn't drinking for a while because of the responses I knew I'd get. One friends response was "OMG wHY?!?!?!?!? " If I go out and don't drink I get a lot of oh come on you can afford the calories or just have one with me i don't wanna drink alone or you're already out just drink. I wish it was more socially acceptable for young people to not drink. I agree that it is best to try to hang out with different people so you're not continued to be stuck in that cycle. BUT I also know it is difficult to make new friends when not going out drinking. I am shy and don't meed many people through work. I though maybe joining the gym would be a good way to make some new friends, but eh hasn't really worked. Oh well...I'd rather be sober with a few friends than a drunk mess with a bunch of superficial friends. You just have to figure out what it is you really want and make changes to support your goals.
Good Luck!0 -
Binge drinking is not funny........... I'm told he was feeling ruff the next day!!!
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I get what you all mean about finding friends who support it. My best friends do support my choices. But still, literally everyone my age seems to go out drinking every weekend. If I go out with them and don't drink it annoys them, like maybe they feel self-conscious being drunk when I'm staying sober? I don't know.
when i was in high school (drinking age is 18 in the uk) i just became the designated driver as i didn't want to drink but all my friends did. in college, on the nights i didn't feel like throwing up when i got home, i kind of became the same person. i made sure everyone got home ok. i was the very rare student who liked going out but didn't like drinking much. some of my friends didn't understand it, and didn't like that i wasn't falling over drunk with them, but eventually they just got used to it. the ones who didn't, i ended up distancing myself from naturally. it wasn't a conscious decision, but we simply went to different places.
as i've gotten older, i'm 33 now,, the same has happened. the friends who insist on drinking every single week end up not being as close as the friends who don't. you naturally seem to develop different interests. the friends who watch movies, go out for meals, grab a coffee etc are the ones you stay close to. the friends who want to drink the night away and suffer every single weekend are the ones you will meet up with every couple months.
and if you do have to explain your reasons, i always found 'it all tastes pretty cr*p' to be the best one. if you tell people you're trying to get healthy, they seem to get defensive, like you're criticizing their lifestyle.0 -
Right, I know the 14 units a week bit. And it's never good to drink most of them in one night. Just wanted you to know that some folks were misunderstanding exactly how much you're drinking.
Well, women aren't supposed to have more than 14 units a week over here, which I do if I have a whole half bottle, but I rarely do anymore. But we're not supposed to have more than 3 a day either, so it is still definitely binge drinking.
:laugh:
Haha!! :laugh: Oh lordy, 15 drinks?! Nooo.The average drinker/dieter? No. Ounces for liquor, and then other measures for wine (5oz? I can't remember), and beer. Actually, your OP probably freaked a few Americans out if they were assuming a 1:1 ratio of "drinks" to "units".
Not all, but a few were probably freaking.
Just gonna have to find like minded friends, I guess. But I think it's a binge drinking culture in the UK, which makes it a bit more difficult.0 -
Fwiw, I'm not going to tell you to get new friends. I think that's unrealistic advice. I will suggest that you do what YOU need to do (whatever you decide) and of course, always be safe. You can always quote the tougher new drinking/driving laws if someone has to drive.
I bet, if you drink less by, say,a third, the rest will work itself out.0 -
After you drink a bottle of vodka, just inbox me.
We'll take it from there.0 -
I have gone through this several times. I got bored of the party scene way sooner then my friends did. I would stop partying then realized I lost all my friends, so then I would start again. Then, I would realize it wasn't for me and stop again, then got sad I was bored on weekends so started again. It became a cycle until a year or so ago (I am almost 27 - ew) and realized that I am REALLY over it and don't want the binge drinking, drugs, party lifestyle in my life at all. Unfortunately, I did lose some friends over this but it also made me realize that they were just "party friends". I have since found a couple new friends that like doing the things I do (without being high or drunk the whole time). You will find new friends that don't want to party all the time too, but the transition can be pretty lonely since apparently drinking and drugs are way more popular then being sober these days. You could also go the option of going sober to all the events, but I found I was getting harassed too much and called "lame" for not wanting to drink and be high all the time.0
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Tell your friends you're pregnant. They will not pressure you to drink anymore.0
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You should be the perfect friend. An automatic DD for party nights!0
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Fwiw, I'm not going to tell you to get new friends. I think that's unrealistic advice. I will suggest that you do what YOU need to do (whatever you decide) and of course, always be safe.
This. I wouldn't even say anything about it to them. If they notice you're consuming less, well then they noticed. But they have to notice first. But if you TELL them that's what you're doing, then they know and now you've put yourself in a position to be judged by them for a decision that is only really affecting you.0 -
Agreed. And if you order "bitters and club soda" as your drink, they likely won't notice for a very long time... (which was why I suggested it earlier). And if you're drinking bitters and soda water for a while, I suspect the rest will work itself out.Fwiw, I'm not going to tell you to get new friends. I think that's unrealistic advice. I will suggest that you do what YOU need to do (whatever you decide) and of course, always be safe.
This. I wouldn't even say anything about it to them. If they notice you're consuming less, well then they noticed. But they have to notice first. But if you TELL them that's what you're doing, then they know and now you've put yourself in a position to be judged by them for a decision that is only really affecting you.0 -
Briiiiilliant! :drinker:Tell your friends you're pregnant. They will not pressure you to drink anymore.0
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