Feel guilty about eating.

sissiluv

So I'm trying to eat 1400 to 1600 cals a day, the latter being my BMR, while on the 30 day shred (day 2!). I ate a little over 1400 calories yesterday and today I'm so miserable I'm crying about it.
I understand that this guilt is irrational but it doesn't stop me from feeling it.

My case worker wants me to stop worrying about my food intake and exercise, I think, as I've been very emotionally/mentally unstable recently. I haven't been able to exercise as often as I'd like to due to side effects of new medication I'm on but I've been feeling up to it lately, hence the 30 day shred.

I've also gained three pounds, and have been holding steady at around 190 for a month and a bit. I dipped under to 187 for a bit but now I've gained, which doesn't help.

I was wondering if anyone else has experienced a similar problem and if so, how you've overcome this miserable guilt.

Thanks.

Jamcnair

If your bmr is 1600, how come you are eating below it?

freelancejouster

To lose consistantly you need to be eating above your BMR and below your TDEE.

It might not be so much how much you're eating but what you're eating. Did the foods have lots of sodium in them? (decent explanation for your weight gain) Does it bother you to think about eating them? Don't eat those. Grab proteins and grainy breads and veggies - 'healthy' foods. Foods you're comfortable with.

sissiluv

If your bmr is 1600, how come you are eating below it?

Because my personal trainer recommended 1400 even after I told her my BMR was around 1600 (TDEE being around 2000).

jzammetti

While I agree you should eat MORE than your BMR every day - you did not ask about that.

As for the guilt...we play a mind game with ourselves for deep-seated subconscious reasons. I found that I had to conscioulsy defy that inner ugly voice. It took me nearly a year to get good at it...but it is possible and WORTH EVERY STEP OF THE FIGHT.

What helped me was learning as much as I can about how our bodies function and how to be healthy. I could attack that ugly voice with facts and sheer will to move forward. You can do this - but it does take time.

jzammetti

If your bmr is 1600, how come you are eating below it?

Because my personal trainer recommended 1400 even after I told her my BMR was around 1600 (TDEE being around 2000).

Your personal trainer is not a nutrition expert? I would not rely on a trainer for that advice.

sissiluv

To lose consistantly you need to be eating above your BMR and below your TDEE.

It might not be so much how much you're eating but what you're eating. Did the foods have lots of sodium in them? (decent explanation for your weight gain) Does it bother you to think about eating them? Don't eat those. Grab proteins and grainy breads and veggies - 'healthy' foods. Foods you're comfortable with.

I'm not comfortable with any food. Yesterday was a great day, very 'healthy' with yogurts, cottage cheese, fruit and veg, and I still feel miserable about it because I ate over 1200.
Water retention is a good explanation as this week has been much higher in sodium.

sissiluv

While I agree you should eat MORE than your BMR every day - you did not ask about that.

As for the guilt...we play a mind game with ourselves for deep-seated subconscious reasons. I found that I had to conscioulsy defy that inner ugly voice. It took me nearly a year to get good at it...but it is possible and WORTH EVERY STEP OF THE FIGHT.

What helped me was learning as much as I can about how our bodies function and how to be healthy. I could attack that ugly voice with facts and sheer will to move forward. You can do this - but it does take time.

Thank you, I greatly appreciate your advice.

ETA: In regards to your other comment, technically internet calculators aren't either. It's all guess work at the end of the day.

cmriverside

When you undereat (meaning below your BMR) eventually you will have to give in to uncontrolled eating. Your body needs that nourishment.

I think you should listen to your case worker. Get your meds squared away, and work on your anxiety and don't focus on food calories right now.

Some strenuous exercise will help - keep doing it. When you exercise you're going to need extra food.

Maybe step away from MFP for a while. This site can be very difficult for people coping with emotional problems.

Good luck.

jzammetti

While I agree you should eat MORE than your BMR every day - you did not ask about that.

As for the guilt...we play a mind game with ourselves for deep-seated subconscious reasons. I found that I had to conscioulsy defy that inner ugly voice. It took me nearly a year to get good at it...but it is possible and WORTH EVERY STEP OF THE FIGHT.

What helped me was learning as much as I can about how our bodies function and how to be healthy. I could attack that ugly voice with facts and sheer will to move forward. You can do this - but it does take time.

Thank you, I greatly appreciate your advice.

ETA: In regards to your other comment, technically internet calculators aren't either. It's all guess work at the end of the day.

You are correct - that is why there is an actual medical test out there to determine your RMR.

wonderwomn27

i do all the time,i tomorrows a new day. and u just get back on. Take it dayby day good luck!!!

__RANDY__

Because my personal trainer

I stopped reading there. Personal trainers are idiots 99.9999% of the time.

courtneybfree

sissiluv you can do it. I am Week 2 Day 2 of the Shred and I'm seeing how my eating habits had deteriorated, now I'm back on course. When you look a the diet it does look like a little bit of food, but with the snacks and meals you actually feel full. I was surprised. Often when we are destressed, worried, or basically trippin', we find ourselves emotionally eating. You mention your emotional state may not be at the top of it's game, but be encouraged that you can. Just know that no one is expected to be perfect, and there is room for growth, not just with the diet, but in our overall character development. If there is a set back, get up, brush it off and strive to do better next time around. That's life.

It's only day two, and if you need encouragement throughout, just reach out - I'm just an email away!! come'on now, let's kick this diet's butt!
"Believe. Act as If. Live Like you Already Have It" ~ We can do this thing!
Courtney