SABOTAGE: Only in your mind.
Ramberta
Posts: 1,312 Member
Attitude is everything, ladies and gentlemen!
This morning, one of my co-workers from another department brought in 3 dozen donuts for the entire store. He's done this before, and it's a sweet (ha!) gesture.
I had brought my usual baggie of cereal for breakfast to eat on my break, but I decided to skip it and have a donut instead. Strawberry frosted, and it was worth every bite. Feeling satisfied in my indulgence, I went about my workday.
A co-worker from my department, a 34-year-old mother of a toddler, had me walk with her not once, but twice to get her own donuts. And the second time around, she insisted that I split the donut with her, saying "I won't take no for an answer" even after I politely declined twice.
So guess what? I ate it, and I enjoyed it.
I didn't get mad at her for "forcing" food on me. If I REALLY hadn't wanted it, I would have stood my ground and told her that I'm trying to cut down on processed sugars, or, accepted it and then pretended to go somewhere else to eat it and thrown it away. I didn't think that she was "sabotaging" my weight loss efforts, because she and all other members of my department know that I'm on MFP and am losing weight. (In fact, one of my younger co-workers is on here too now!) As I ate the half of the donut, I said "guess I'll have to walk more today to burn this off!" and laughed. Because really, that's all it takes-- twenty minutes of exercise and that half donut may not have even existed in my system at all.
The bottom line here is: If you think you're being "sabotaged" at work, school, or in any other social setting, take a step back and really THINK about it. YOU are in control of what goes into your body, and you are also in control of how you handle situations like this. Not everyone will know, or care, about your desires to lose weight. You just have to accept that, and once you do, you'll realize that the world isn't out to get you. People don't only offer you food because they hate you. Or because they're jealous. Sometimes, people just offer you food because they like sharing and are kind, generous people.
Now I know there will be some people proving that there are exceptions to this, because OCCASIONALLY there is malicious intent when people try to "break" other people's diets. In that kind of situation, especially in a work setting, the best thing to do is to gain privacy when you eat so that you are not subjected to scrutiny or temptation. But if you don't want to hole up in your car, you're going to have to face the music eventually. You are STRONGER than temptation, and when you BELIEVE that, the "sabotage" won't only not affect you any more-- it will CEASE TO EXIST!
This morning, one of my co-workers from another department brought in 3 dozen donuts for the entire store. He's done this before, and it's a sweet (ha!) gesture.
I had brought my usual baggie of cereal for breakfast to eat on my break, but I decided to skip it and have a donut instead. Strawberry frosted, and it was worth every bite. Feeling satisfied in my indulgence, I went about my workday.
A co-worker from my department, a 34-year-old mother of a toddler, had me walk with her not once, but twice to get her own donuts. And the second time around, she insisted that I split the donut with her, saying "I won't take no for an answer" even after I politely declined twice.
So guess what? I ate it, and I enjoyed it.
I didn't get mad at her for "forcing" food on me. If I REALLY hadn't wanted it, I would have stood my ground and told her that I'm trying to cut down on processed sugars, or, accepted it and then pretended to go somewhere else to eat it and thrown it away. I didn't think that she was "sabotaging" my weight loss efforts, because she and all other members of my department know that I'm on MFP and am losing weight. (In fact, one of my younger co-workers is on here too now!) As I ate the half of the donut, I said "guess I'll have to walk more today to burn this off!" and laughed. Because really, that's all it takes-- twenty minutes of exercise and that half donut may not have even existed in my system at all.
The bottom line here is: If you think you're being "sabotaged" at work, school, or in any other social setting, take a step back and really THINK about it. YOU are in control of what goes into your body, and you are also in control of how you handle situations like this. Not everyone will know, or care, about your desires to lose weight. You just have to accept that, and once you do, you'll realize that the world isn't out to get you. People don't only offer you food because they hate you. Or because they're jealous. Sometimes, people just offer you food because they like sharing and are kind, generous people.
Now I know there will be some people proving that there are exceptions to this, because OCCASIONALLY there is malicious intent when people try to "break" other people's diets. In that kind of situation, especially in a work setting, the best thing to do is to gain privacy when you eat so that you are not subjected to scrutiny or temptation. But if you don't want to hole up in your car, you're going to have to face the music eventually. You are STRONGER than temptation, and when you BELIEVE that, the "sabotage" won't only not affect you any more-- it will CEASE TO EXIST!
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Replies
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I have no will power so I just try to avoid those types of situations. Sometimes I miss baking.0
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I have no will power so I just try to avoid those types of situations. Sometimes I miss baking.
Yeah, I've decided that if I ever bake, I will set aside 4-6 cookies/muffins/etc for myself and my boyfriend to enjoy, and then bring the rest to work the next day to give them away. Also, if my co-worker makes it a regular thing to buy donuts, eventually I will have to be stubborn and refuse. He's only done it twice in 6 months though, so I'm not terribly worried.0 -
Soo true! In my office, there's a potluck every other week. At least 3x week people bring in muffins, donuts, donut holes, and other delicious (fatty) goodies and I resist every time. It's okay to say yes, and it's okay to say no.0
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i agree with you....we are in control of our own destinies....period. and yup, i would have enjoyed every bite of the donut too:) some calories are worth it....
i had a girlfriend buy me a bag of my favorite easter candy....i thanked her, and threw it out....no stories about sabotage versus a nice gesture, it didn't matter...I ultimately controlled the situation:)0 -
Eating donuts is fine if your at your goal weight, why make it harder to get there by eating something that is
really just a waste of time... Losing weight and being fit take a lot of work and being able to say not today
maybe next time.0 -
great post!0
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Eating donuts is fine if your at your goal weight, why make it harder to get there by eating something that is
really just a waste of time... I love having the reputation of boring person that will not eat crappy food.
I completely agree, but donuts have never been a 'staple' food for me, even in the "bad old days". They have always been an occasional treat (as in, once every few months), and an occasional treat they will remain.0 -
You know that you can make a cake mix, bake up whatever number of cupcakes is reasonable and then freeze the rest in a freezer-safe ziplock bag? You can probably do the same thing with most cookie doughs. Cheers!0
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Soo true! In my office, there's a potluck every other week. At least 3x week people bring in muffins, donuts, donut holes, and other delicious (fatty) goodies and I resist every time. It's okay to say yes, and it's okay to say no.
Good for you!! Luckily, the free stuff only comes in once in a blue moon, but I used to buy a candy bar (or one of those theatre-style boxes) on my breaks, because it was "too tempting" because I see them all throughout the store. But now I barely glance at them, or if I do, I think of how I'd be wasting my hard-earned money on food that would only throw off my macros for the day!0 -
You know that you can make a cake mix, bake up whatever number of cupcakes is reasonable and then freeze the rest in a freezer-safe ziplock bag? You can probably do the same thing with most cookie doughs. Cheers!
Really? And it thaws out all right? That sounds amazing! I have also heard of "mug cakes" and will be trying those sometime soon too.0 -
i agree with you....we are in control of our own destinies....period. and yup, i would have enjoyed every bite of the donut too:) some calories are worth it....
i had a girlfriend buy me a bag of my favorite easter candy....i thanked her, and threw it out....no stories about sabotage versus a nice gesture, it didn't matter...I ultimately controlled the situation:)
Good for you! I know I'd feel guilty throwing something away, so I'd probably just give it to my boyfriend to snarf down, haha. But she'll never know you didn't eat it, so it's a win-win 0 -
Bah! My 11 year old daughter is TOTALLY trying to sabotage me. If I stay fat, I continue to buy goodies. If I insist on trying to maintain a healthy diet for me and for her, I make her eat GREEN THINGS. :sad:
I agree with you. I still buy her goodies (though fewer and of higher quality, because I love her and want her to be healthy, which she RILLY RILLY RESENTS), and sometimes I also eat them and sometimes I don't, as I choose.0 -
Tried to quote from the OP but couldn't :-( but wanted to say that the bit about YOU being in control of what YOU
put in your mouth is so true and the recognition of this is what has kept me off chocolate sweets and crisps since the start of the year.
I too used to say "I have no willpower" when really I didn't want to use the willpower I had! Everybody has willpower they just have to make the conscious decision to use it!
Well done for enjoying your donuts OP!
Bx0 -
Tried to quote from the OP but couldn't :-( but wanted to say that the bit about YOU being in control of what YOU
put in your mouth is so true and the recognition of this is what has kept me off chocolate sweets and crisps since the start of the year.
I too used to say "I have no willpower" when really I didn't want to use the willpower I had! Everybody has willpower they just have to make the conscious decision to use it!
Well done for enjoying your donuts OP!
Bx
I used to think I had no willpower, too. Then I realized that I am one of the most stubborn people imaginable. It wasn't that I didn't have willpower --- I'm very willful. It's that I wasn't willing to apply that willpower to taking care of myself. Once that changed, this became a lot easier for me!0 -
Interesting....I was just about to post a quote from one of my favorite philosophers, Epictetus, on this very subject. Thanks for making the application to weightloss and eating. 0
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Interesting....I was just about to post a quote from one of my favorite philosophers, Epictetus, on this very subject. Thanks for making the application to weightloss and eating.
What is the quote? I'm curious now.0 -
My husband will bring things home sometimes, that he knows I no longer want to eat. I used to think there was some sabotage going on because I was losing weight and he wasn't ready to start his weight loss journey yet. Then I realized that he just wasn't thinking and he was just trying to be nice. Once you get it out of your head that there isn't some sabotage/conspiracy going on, it is easier for you to stay in control and master everything, and be accountable for, what you eat.0
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You said..."The bottom line here is: If you think you're being "sabotaged" at work, school, or in any other social setting, take a step back and really THINK about it. YOU are in control of what goes into your body, and you are also in control of how you handle situations like this."
Epictetus believed that...
"Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible."0 -
You said..."The bottom line here is: If you think you're being "sabotaged" at work, school, or in any other social setting, take a step back and really THINK about it. YOU are in control of what goes into your body, and you are also in control of how you handle situations like this."
Epictetus believed that...
"Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible."
Cool! We never studied Epictetus in school, but I wholeheartedly agree with that sentiment. And when it comes to what you eat, I think that we are 100% in control. Sure, we've got variables and obstacles that need to be dealt with (budget, proximity of stores, how many people we're providing for, allergies/special conditions, etc), but ultimately, if we put something in our mouth and eat it, it's because we chose to, which means we are in control. 0
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