Other people's negative attitudes towards dieting

dinkydudette

Does anyone else encounter this? On the one hand I get a lot of negative comments about my weight and criticism about what I should be doing about it. However on the other hand I get a lot of people criticising me for aiming to eat healthily calling me vain and anorexic. I don't ever eat under 1200 a day and usually it's not even close, but if I decline a piece of chocolate I'm suddenly portrayed as some sort of disordered riddled monster and given days on end of lectures about the dangers of eating disorders.
I feel like I need to make up lies in order to stop the constant lecturing and criticism, maybe telling them I'm allergic to an ingredient or something?

BrokenCowgirl

I know exactly how you feel. I've experienced the exact same thing. In my experience when it comes to family and friends often when you are heavier they don't mind letting you know that you should do something about it because they want you to be healthier and happier with yourself. But once you start to really lose the weight some people feel threatened by your success, they want you to do well and they want you to look good, they just don't want you to look better than them. I wouldn't lie or make up excuses. What you put into your body is your business. I often just tell people no thanks and when they continue to pressure me to have dessert I just tell them that "Health is a relationship between me and my body!!" It has nothing to do with them and they should just focus and their own relationship with food and their bodies. I try to be polite but direct in my approach.

Yica83

i hear you... when i turn down a piece of cake ppl tell me 'oh nothing is going to happen for a piece of cake"; it really bothers me because that attitude is what has got me overweight! Just ignore them, dont let someone else attitude derail you from achieving your goal.

zillah73

People's responses have more to do with them than with you. I think sometimes when we are making healthy choices, opting for better nutrition and improving our quality of life, it somehow holds up a mirror for others to see what they are choosing not to do and maybe feel they should be doing.

KenosFeoh

I know. I hear "diets don't work" all the time. Yes they do. What doesn't work is not paying attention to my diet.

aliencheesecake

Sometimes the people closest to us seem to think it's okay to weigh in (pardon the pun), whether we want their opinion or not. And some people just want to tear you down because they don't have the fortitude to change what they don't like about themsleves, like we're doing.

jfrankic

Yep.....but ya know what?


Keep on keeping on, girlie!

KenosFeoh

By the way, for a decade or so, I totally bought into the idea that if I stopped being crazy about food and allowed myself to eat whatever I was craving as long as I was hungry, my body would settle at the weight it was genetically destined to be. What a crocka! Turns out that I have a hard time telling the difference between hunger and appetite, and my body didn't crave things I really needed - like broccoli. My cravings were more of the trail mix and chocolate type. Yeh - like I really need cup after cup of that stuff every day.

I'm a big believer in letting my brain be my guide when it comes to my diet. My "intuition" is a sadistic *****.

OddChoices

The phrase often used is "Oh go on. Eat that cake. Live a liittle". I recently heard a good response and have decided to borrow it, "I want to live a lot and in pretty looking clothes".

stackhsc

yes, i get it too.
ive even gotten the you look great, congrats on the weight loss and the you need to eat more from the same people... figure that one out lol
do what i did.... on a routine trip to the drs i briefly talked about my weight loss with her, explained what i was doing and what my goals were, asked if she had any concerns or guidance. After that when anyone gave me grief, legitimate grief not just a passing comment, i'd tell them when they got their medical license we could discuss it further,

ThickMcRunFast

Your ticker says you want to get down to 99 pounds, so I hope you are shorter than 5 feet. If not, maybe they are legitimately worried about you. That is a low weight.

valeriewxy

Your ticker says you want to get down to 99 pounds, so I hope you are shorter than 5 feet. If not, maybe they are legitimately worried about you. That is a low weight.

This

BUT assuming you are aiming for something reasonable, then I'd say just ignore what the rest say. Sometimes when someone loses / is losing weight at a regular pace, people start thinking there must be a problem. Maybe because they've tried some fad diet and it never lasted as long as your healthy eating, so they think you must be doing something even more extreme. Who knows what they think anyway? Keep it up ^__^

skinnyinmt

I think it's important to remind people you are making a LIFESTYLE change. Diets don't work because eventually they end and people often resort to old behaviors. A lifestyle change allows you to integrate the new behaviors as the new you!! I am a believer in losing it in a way you can live it. M-F I am preety on and allow for flexibility on my weekends to go out or splurge w/ friends. Good for you!!

AddyMaeMomma

The worst was when my mother told me she was afraid we (my husband is also getting healthy) were making our 2 year old eat less food since we were eating less food. I have never been so offended in my life than at this ridiculous assertion. Then she told me we would just gain the weight back anyway. She thinks "getting healthy" = "starving yourself". Needless to say, my mother and I don't really get along.

lovemitch125

Yes I get this a lot, especially since I work in a restaurant where people make us big dinners, if it's something I really didn't think I should have, I bought my dinner somewhere or brought it and people would judge me cuz im not a vegetarian?

Then I have the people who when I said I was dieting and wanted to eat something, pointed out what was bad in everything I was eating. WELL NO DUH NOT EVERYTHING IS 100% PERFECT FOR YOU! I said I'd get a sub, no mayo, no sauce, no cheese, light meat and veggies and someone had the nerve to say the bread was bad for me, You have got to be kidding me...

I get it both ways, but haters gonna hate and I feel good with my choices and they're obviously working so f*** 'em.

Warchortle

I store a lot of fat around my waist... I have very lean other parts of my body, so when I tell people I want to get to 150 they freak out. I shrug off their hippie comments. My hip to ratio still puts me 1.1 which is still not in the normal range.

angmarie28

ya, I get this all the time, if im with my friends, they threaten to shove food down my throat if I only eat a small sandwich and a couple chips (i eat just to be polite, id rather eat my own foods) then I dont eat cake and I get, "really, c'mon, its albertsons cake with whipped frosting, you're already so skinny" now im vegetarian, and my mom keeps trying to convince me chicken and fish are vegetarian foods :huh:

stella1314

Thats exactly how and why i became a bulimic, bc i saw in binging and purging the only way how to make LOVING CARING FAMILY and FRIENDS be happy seeing me eat and enjoy food !
and then they called me " a bad girl"......
so everything for nothing....
and now , when i am not a bulimic anymore i dont give a flying f--k what they think about my eating!
i am a strong person who eats when she wants and what she wants, and if they dont like it, go f---k yourself!

Amy106Days

Practice these phrases

"No Thankyou, I had cake for breakfast" ...this one works best for sweets or ethnic foods example:"No thanks, I had shwarma for brunch"

"I saw a thing on dateline about _________ and I am cold on it for now" This one works best on nervous conspiracy theorists and the thing on dateline could have been a commercial during dateline...who pays attention? Best followed by "no no I am not sure I believe it and I don't want to put you off your supper."

"No, Thank you." This is my favorite. I try to never mention my diet in public so this is my go to.

"Do you have any honey?" I got this one from my little nieces. When they were younger they would only eat rolls/bread at dinner with honey, preferably fresh honey. They weren't dieting they just knew what they liked and why settle for less. I found most folks did not have honey. If I know they have honey I switch wanting to apple butter.

Speaking as a formerly thin girl a lot of the time when I said c'mon just have some to a friend on a diet I just didn't realize the struggle. It was never meant as a taunt or judgement. More as this is delicious eat it and skip something else.

aliencheesecake

Gotta love that passive aggressive "they mean well" *kitten*.

okcat4

Love the date line idea. I say no thanks and if they push, just say, no thanks again. If possible walk away or distract them. If all else fails, take a little piece and destroy it ( you know, if I move it around, Mom wont notice the peas are the same amount destroy). No one wants to eat it then. ( Or damn! dropped it on the floor or dropped my fork.

Another is I am saving my cals for dinner - got a hot date with hubs!