Unsupportive Friends and Coworkers

tiffanyisk

I have a similar but not quite the same problem, My sister moved in with me 2 months ago, I stopped working out because she was always around and I am self conscious working out in front of people (I have weights and wii fit I use atm) and then she started bringing her fave foods into my house: Pizza pops, soda, pasta, Pizza... she was ordering out ALL the time... and I have no self control I worked for 6 months to get into a routine I lost nearly 30 Lbs and then I gained 6 in 2 weeks . Finally I put my foot down and told her to stop bringing in bad food... she doesnt buy bad food anymore, and when she does its in her room now but she still orders food on her cooking nights... Like tonight she told me shes bringing pizza home for dinner. I think if I have 1 small piece and supplement it with salad and fruit that I will be fine... I feel bad saying no . Either way I am back on track now... my husband is wonderful he has his own stash of bad food hidden from me and he eats my clean food without complaint and when he cooks he tries to use only whole wheat, chicken and healthy alternatives, he wants me to succeed for me. My 2 best friends are both skinny one constantly complains she is fat, she is my best friend and I love her but being 5'4 and under 130... not fat... so she helps me and we have devised a cooking plan and we cook together and text each other when we want to cheat to support each other... but I don't think she fully understands how it makes me feel when she thinks shes fat and she is less than half of me... my other friend just doesnt care she eats bad she eats good she could really care less as long as we're happy love her. I am one of the bosses at my job so people don't mess with me LMAO. My main issue is my family... and now that my sister is living with me, I feel like my support system is shattered.. just because she goes to the gym every night after work and can justify it herself I'm glad shes still losing weight (bitter much)


Either way I digress, I understand how hard it can be. I just have to learn to take the blame for my bad habits

mazekah

Read the book "When you eat at the refrigerator, pull up a chair." and check out OA, especially OA-HOW. The book helps me get out of the wierd mind space around food, and OA gives me support. PS- OA stands for Overeaters Anonymous. Awesome people.

kerndog87

This is the only suppourt I have as well so it is really nice to hear all of the motivating messages on here to help you stick to your guns and achieve your goals!!!!

Gizziemoto

First thank you everyone for the support and encouragement.

Second, has this happened to you. I do not tell people I am on diet or anything because It takes forever for me to lose a pound (meds and food allergies). I asked one person who was taking 5 eggs, lots of cheese and a package of processed lunch meat mixing it together and eating if for breakfast. All I said was that it looked good. They went on to explain in great detail the 17 day diet and then looked at my greek yogurt and granola bar and gave me a lecture on how bad that was for me. Yes, this person lost a lot of weight and has gained it all back.

All I said was looked good and got a lecture.

JJordon

This is the only suppourt I have as well so it is really nice to hear all of the motivating messages on here to help you stick to your guns and achieve your goals!!!!

You do you. 'Cause only in the end, does that actually matter.

Unknown

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bellyboosmom

I completely understand. I came to this site looking for supportive and encouraging people, and I have found so many of them. I decided not to tell anyone else that I know personally or professionally that I was on a journey to get healthy, because the few people that I did tell, were not very supportive. The truth is, this is my journey, not theirs. If they can’t be supportive of me during my struggle, they won’t be there at the finish. I plan on losing all of the dead weight in my life, not just the pounds I have put on.

Just do your best to stay on track, and tell people politely that you are trying to live a healthier lifestyle. You can do this!!

RATSMITH69

You have tons of supporters right here. Just "friend" a few of us and we will cheer you on!

himilayaneyes

Keep saying no or learn how to incorporate things like going to McDonald's occasionally into your diet. I use the MFP app on my phone to look up calories when going out so it really hasn't impacted my relationship with family or co-workers. I still pretty much eat what I want as long as it's in my cal limit. However, you have to do what works for you. Good luck.

Francl27

I don't tell people either. This way everyone leaves me alone if I have a piece of ice cream cake at a birthday party or whatever. I'd go to McDonald's and get a salad or something though.

My0WNinspiration

I ignore them

KickyLegs

I wouldn't say you are trying to loose weight either. I'd say you are a nutritionist and that you refuse to eat anything processed, etc.

I don't tell people a damned thing. I'm not going to make excuses or justify why I'm not doing things the way they do. I just tell them I don't want that cake someone brought for so and so's birthday.

Yea, actually. I agree, why make excuses. You are right!

KANGOOJUMPS

U should stay away from people like that, they are toxic.

dramallamaduck

Most everyone I have is really supportive. If I say no thanks, typically people are pretty good about respecting my wishes. I did have a coworker offer me a sundae last week though... It was delicious. And it cured my ice cream craving for the month!

Lyd1964

I am fortunate in that I have my co-workers who are supportive and my daughter because without them I couldn't have the courage to do this! Just having a few ppl in your corner can make ALL the difference! My good friend doesn't seem to 'get' this and so isn't really very helpful-I have had to learn to tune her out or I get easily discouraged. When I said I wanted to take spin classes I got: I don't kow why you wld want to do that-u have to go somewhere to do that" Well yeah THAT is the idea! Keep up the good work! And tune out the negative influences as much as possible! :-)

galenofedgewood

I guess I'm really fortunate as well. I'm getting nothing but positive re-enforcment where I work and at home. /dunno

Okay, I've gotten a few "stop losing weight, you're wasting away" and the "what, are you on crack to lose so much weight?", but that's about it.

jazzy1a

Get them involved in what you're doing:
I'm starting a Diet Bet game, >>>Here's the linky: http://bit.ly/ZZPqHN
that begins on next Monday, April 1st which I'm hoping will get me motivated to stop giving in to my hunger all the time!
I've organized the game around helping each other with strategies for reducing hunger pangs (like low-cal recipes that are filling, etc..)
Its only $21 to join and if you lose only 4% of your body weight in 28 days you win the money in the pot plus have learned how to curb hunger, yay!
maybe they can put side bets on your progress (just kidding)

nicola19489

completely! all my friends at work actually take the mick out of me for not wanting eubbish..telling me one wont hurt also, i resisted and got told i was boring and being stupid..now all of a sudden two other girls (weighing lessthan me) are on diets and ive never seen them so supportive! maybe its a personal thing. all i can advise is as soon as you say diet thats it youll be in for some naggjng. if you say no i dont fancy any thanks theyll leave you alone x

xampx

I don't say anything to people about trying to lose weight.
At work, people keep bringing in cakes and stuff, and I just tell them I can't have it because I have a dairy intolerance, which is true, but if I want cake, I will eat it occasionally.

arthurrichard

"Illegitimi non carborundum" -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illegitimi_non_carborundum

pinkcloudrising

I find that looking at the person and not saying anything works quite well in situations where people do things such as offer me something they know I shouldn't have whether it be food, drugs or alcohol or to join them on an interstate crime spree. That way I am leaving it to them to interpret my lack of a verbal response. I don't engage in dialogue or debate about what I eat or don't eat with anyone except myself.

vickiandrews

I get very mixed messages from coworkers - some of them keep complementing me on how well I'm doing others try to tempt me with cakes. I have also been told that I am obsessed with working my way through the challenges I've set myself through various groups I joined here.

It hurt the first few times I was told this but when I had to throw a pair of trousers away as I kept thinking that they had got that loose they were going to fall down it gave me the strength to ignore them and carry on.

As for those who sabotage me with cakes it all depends on who's bought them - if its someone I'm not really keen on (ie conversations consists of saying "good morning" and that's about it) I won't bother having one. Whereas if it's the ones that are always first in line for birthday cakes that I've bought in then, of course, you have to have one! There are also the ones who never buy anything but take everything that's going.

I know this sounds like I have no will power to say no (and maybe a little bit childish) but I can't help it!

Ophidion

Just remember to look at situations look these as an exercise to strengthen your willpower...more often than not, it's not the situation we are in that affects us but our reaction to them. Remain strong and be sure of yourself!

Persistence and determination will see you through the day.

thejubster1

I'm not wanting to focus just on McDonald's - but here in Australia everything in McDonalds (aka Macca's) has a calorie count, which helps you to make wiser, safer choices from what they have for sale... We get to choose from salads, fresh fruit, healthier wraps etc. Calrorie count is next to each piece on the menu board, and they also have leaflets with nutrition breakdown (carbs, sugar etc)... Is this an Aus specific thing???

Not that I go for it myself - but I know its there...

SweetestLibby

smile politely and say no thank you as many times as needed. When they say "once itsn't going to hurt you" say "you're right but I'll decide when that "once" is and right now I don't want that."

no means no and eventually they'll get it or you'll stop caring whether to not they get it.