When your boyfriend is super skinny?

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  • leantool
    leantool Posts: 365 Member
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    my hubs got smaller feet than mine and we are almost same height(i'm only 1.5"shorter) ,so i wear flats and my feet look like canoes!never mind, just chill!!
  • LovelyLaura2321
    LovelyLaura2321 Posts: 56 Member
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    i am 100 pounds bigger than my fiance! it's really hard at times, but i'm not nearly as self-conscious as i used to be. i'm perfectly comfortable with him, but i still worry what other people think when they see us together.

    i think for you it's really important to realize that your body shape and size is completely different that your boyfriend's body shape and size, and while they may be the same or different, it really means nothing if you have the same amount of inches around your waist or butt or chest. try not to compare yourself to him or anyone else for that matter! you are your own person and are lovely!
  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
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    My goal is to be just as strong or stronger than the guys I date. I want to pick them up, and spin them around while laughing maniacally. I want them to be worried.
  • cleback
    cleback Posts: 261 Member
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    My goal is to be just as strong or stronger than the guys I date. I want to pick them up, and spin them around while laughing maniacally. I want them to be worried.

    AHAHAHA! Too funny!

    To the OP, my husband is skinny too. 5'11" and 135-140 lbs. Even with counting calories, I'm also pretty sure I eat more than him (he has an excuse for that, though-- stomach issues). It's pretty strong motivation to stay in shape and not overeat! Fortunately, he's a smart guy and keeps any snarky comments to himself. :-)

    I, on the other hand, always try to sneak him a fattening snack... lol.
  • nytefalle
    nytefalle Posts: 63
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    Up until two weeks ago, my husband hadn't exercised since he left the military (over 5 years ago). He's 5'10" and 183# to my 5'6.5" and current 196#. He'd lost 7# since he started loading heavy stuff for people at Lowe's and regained a 6-pack. I sort of want to throttle him, but my hands don't fit around his neck anymore :wink:

    He talks about me being bigger than him and my giant butt without thinking for a second it could give me a complex. He likes the butt and he refuses to see that he's buff in the same way other people can't believe they're really smaller after losing weight. I still hit him when he makes a, "you're bigger than me" crack with my "massive" arm.
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
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    Marginally douchey of him to say that. You are young, either he will grow up or you will find someone with more people smarts.
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
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    It sounds to me like that was his own insecurity poking out and that, if anyone, it is him that needs to change.
  • hiimanupa
    hiimanupa Posts: 53
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    He talks about me being bigger than him and my giant butt without thinking for a second it could give me a complex. He likes the butt and he refuses to see that he's buff in the same way other people can't believe they're really smaller after losing weight. I still hit him when he makes a, "you're bigger than me" crack with my "massive" arm.

    See? I'd find stuff like this to be problematic. That's really quite rude, but it's good that you are well tempered enough to not create problems out of it lol.

    Haha, my boyfriend is awesome otherwise-- actually, he usually points out that I'm super small and does random stuff like carry me up the stairs and stuff. It *is* honestly all my fault for generating this sort of a... thing out of nothing.
  • seanezekiel
    seanezekiel Posts: 228 Member
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    Your boyfriend is very small. You cant compare. Its not fair to yourself. He no doubt feels a bit insecure for not being masculine. It goes both ways.
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
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    I don't care what size you are. You are a beautiful girl. Your boyfriend said something silly and awkward, and as long as he loves you and finds you beautiful, it doesn't matter.
  • fairie_marie
    fairie_marie Posts: 106
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    AS you can see from my profile pic I married a bean pole. He is 140 and 5'8 and when we got married I was 244 and 5'5.. He always tells me how beautiful I am and how much he loves me reguardless of my body.. I can't wait until we are closer in weight..
  • kellijauch
    kellijauch Posts: 379 Member
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    My boyfriend is super skinny too. He is very self conscious about being too skinny (which I assume your man probably is too without saying so), while I am self conscious about being too curvy, so I completely relate to this. And he has said some things about my body that were meant to be nice, but just a poor word choice (I don't think men realize how sensitive women really are and that we will over analyze everything they say). For example- he told me that I have a big booty. Now, he totally loves that about me, and he meant it as a complement, but probably not the best thing to say to your girl when she's wanting to lose weight. Lol. You can't compare yourself to him though. Women and men are built so differently that it's not a realistic comparison (apples to oranges babe). Obviously he loves you and he chose you. He sounds like a good guy, just doesn't always think about what he's saying, and that's pretty normal. I understand that feeling of wanting to feel small next to your man (every woman wants that), and with your height difference, I'm sure you do almost all the time, just don't let the silly little things they say without thinking get to you, and keep on your track, and it'll be good!
  • Sharkington
    Sharkington Posts: 485
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    I understand the feeling. I once dated a guy who was much taller than me, but he wasn't super skinny (but not overweight). He was bigger than me for the most part, but as a joke I asked him to try on my shorts - at the time I wore a size 26 and he could fit into them perfectly. I wasn't super upset because a woman's hips/thighs are often times wider than a mans (it's just how us ladies are built), but then I was stupid and asked him if he could ever fit into his previous gf's jeans and he was like "there was only one girl who I couldn't" and for some silly reason I felt insecure because I wasn't as small as his ex. It is really quite ridiculous on my part, but sometimes our insecurities manifest in ridiculous ways. Haha. The truth probably is, he doesn't see you the way you feel - if he says he likes your hips and thighs, he most likely does and having powerful thighs is not masculine at all - it's actually quite feminine, in my opinion. I love that my legs and booty give me a curvier look. :)
  • mrphil86
    mrphil86 Posts: 2,382 Member
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    Just throwing my two cents in and I know I am not the only one:

    I love a woman who is curvy in a toned way. Especially the legs, better not be toothpicks!

    Dunno is that makes sense.
  • Warchortle
    Warchortle Posts: 2,197 Member
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    My roommate was underweight when he joined the marines. They paired up by weight for exercises and the only person that was his weight was a girl that was maybe 5 feet tall... I think he's 6"3...

    2 sides of the coin, he'll never have a built physique unless he goes on a strict regimen and even then... As a guy I just tell my S.O. that I'm busy and after they're used to my schedule I'll just say "I'm going for a run or to the gym." Often times I'll say it in a weird way like "I'm going to be back in 90 minutes after gettin' all hot, sweaty, and steamy in public." Everyone knows I take exercise seriously, but I don't want to tell someone "don't bother me for 2 hours."
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
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    If he tells you these things as a compliment, take them as such. Powerful legs are a good thing to have. =D
  • Lupercalia
    Lupercalia Posts: 1,857 Member
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    I'm not interested in being "dainty" or "small". I like to take up space, be viewed as capable and strong. I see those things as positive and very feminine traits. I don't see being weak, frail, dainty, small, etc. as being desirable or feminine--just things people are mistaken about with regards to femininity.

    I think powerful, strong, and capable women are most beautiful and admirable.
  • sally_jeffswife
    sally_jeffswife Posts: 766 Member
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    my husband is 5 ft 7 and weights about 143-145 lbs. I am 5 ft even and weight 169.7. I am always constantly watching how I eat, he drinks nearly a 12 pack of mountain dew a day and eats a ton of sodium. He is a little younger than me. He just has a much faster metabolism. He's supportive of me though so thats great I don't mind it. And I know I'm healthy, health wise I have had less medical issues so thankful for that. Some days I wish I could just drink regular soda n look like that but then I tell myself I am doing great health wise and I'm gonna get muscles like a machine if I keep this up so I should just stick with it.
  • xampx
    xampx Posts: 323 Member
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    I am 5ft 4 and currently 202lbs, my bf is 5ft 9 and just under 160lbs. He has a 30in waist!

    But he is incredibly supportive and although he wasn't really happy with fat me, it was in part because he knew I wasn't happy with fat me.

    He isn't trying to lose weight but is careful about what he eats and after 6 months of renovating his house, he is starting to look very muscular and lean.

    I am way stronger and fitter than him though because of regular cardio and weight training :) And neither him or I want me to be skinny, I think the strong toned look will be good for both of us :)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Well, this is different, but speaking of things boyfriends say. When my husband and I were dating, he asked me if I had any sweat pants he could wear (he was over my place).

    I said, "None that would fit you!"

    Then he pointed at a pair of my pants and said, "What about those?"

    I said, "Those would never fit you. They look loose, but the waist is actually very very tiny!"

    Then he said, "But, they fit over your butt!!"

    And the funny thing was that he felt insulted that I told him my butt was smaller than his, and he didn't understand why I was so shocked that he thought my butt was bigger than his. It all got cleared up later when he realized that my butt is not big, it just looked proportionally bigger because my waist and rib cage are very very small. But, we had to pull out a tape measurer to prove it. And he does not have that type of waist to hip ratio (of course). He is also a slender guy (but not as slender as he thought, maybe he was still thinking back to when he was a teen). I told my friends and we all had a good laugh over that. He still feels embarrassed sometimes when I bring it up (but we laugh about it).

    But, anyway, you probably have a smaller waist than your guy. It's normal that you have curves and he is probably a more slender/straight figure. You are not big. Accept his compliments because it's obvious he loves your figure.

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