Food Addiction

IHTSM

Good morning everyone,

I am hoping for some help. I have been on a "weightloss" journey since about a year ago, but for as long as I can remember I have always had a very bad relationship with food and with with myself, I have struggled with eating disorders for ever. I say that my weightloss journey started a year ago, but in reality I have ALWAYS, constantly been worrying about my weight, and trying the most extreme diets and fasts in effort to lose. A few times I went 10-14 days without ANY food. I would lose 10-15 lbs during that time, but it would basically all come back soon after. Somehow I have always managed to stay within an almost healthy weight range for my height - basically by being extremely active.

I feel like food runs my life! I am constantly thinking about it, stressing about it. I can never seem to be happy with the way I look. I have a lot of friends that are super thin and beautiful - I guess it makes me kind of a bad person because I get jealous, and then my friendships end up suffering and I push them away....

This has got to stop! But I don't know how! It seems like the more I try to fix it, the worse it gets.

I had a very good drop in weight about a year ago, and I have managed to keep it off by training for an running a marathon (October). But since then I thought I would focus on just eating right and take a little break from extreme exercise (I still walk to and from work each day, 30min each way, do yoga sometimes, rock climbing, go outside a lot). But through all of that time, including the marathon running time, I kept having these horrible insane binge sessions, about 1 every 7 days. Lately I can't get a handle on it!!!! I can be good for 1-3 days, but then I get out of control for 3-4, and worse (more calories, like thousands, not hundreds) than ever! This has been my life for the last month or so. I have gained over 5 lbs in 1 month!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel terrible and guilty now. like this will NEVER STOP!

It's like when I think about eating healthy, it makes this little voice in my head (not a real voice, but you know what I mean) that creeps in and urges me to eat something that I shouldn't! This thought gets louder and louder. I constantly have to keep it in check, correct my thought process and keep working, but I can only do that for so long! My will power is ****. It just takes one moment where I am not 100% focused when I cave in which is usually after 3-7 days of CONSTANTLY fighting! I have no idea what to do. My life is being ruined by this, I don't have the willpower to do this on my own! This is so awful...

I guess I am just looking for some help. I go to a nutritionist and doctor once every 1-2 weeks, and have been for a year. I thought it was working for awhile, but now everything seems worse... Please be kind, I don't need any negative comments right now, I have enough in my own head...

feistymoon

I've no experience with what you describe, but i'm a firm believer that sometimes just getting your feelings out there can make things a little better. The first step to fixing a problem with your life is admitting that one exists. Good luck, keep working on this and you will beat it. If you think extra support will help, add me

amyhoss

I feel like our struggles are very similar. I have nothing to contribute; was just hoping for some advice as well. Fast food is my worst offense.

Linzbit

You sound so much like me! I have been struggling with exactly the same. Not sure I can offer anything to help, but if you need someone to rant at, feel free to friend me! ;-)

Mokey41

Are you restricting yourself too much? Only eating "healthy" foods? It's not realistic to think you can live your whole life on a "diet". You have to allow for foods you love, things you crave and just teach yourself portion control. I'd go crazy if I could never have fast food, or chocolate, or chips or any of the other "bad" foods again.

Work out your budget and plan treats within it. You may need to fight the urge to binge but maybe if you know that you can have a reasonable amount of the foods you want on a regular basis it will help subdue the voice that tells you to eat.

Greeo123

I am in a similar boat, i started dieting about 8 weeks ago and havent been losing anything, i go to the gym about 3-4 times per week and eat three healthy meals per day with raw almonds and berries for snacks 3 hours between my meals.. it all goes well and next thing i no i am stuffing my face with crisps or chocolate.

if i get a pang for chocolate i will drive myself crazy with the idea of getting it, so justify it to myself by getting it now rather than thinking about it for 3 hours and then getting it anyway.

I end up eating a bit on the weekends and wanted some tips on helping stop the naughty stuff when i love the healthy stuff so much!

I started this healthy lifestyle thing to get in shape for summer but at this rate nothing will have changed.

Help anyone?

xLexa

I have been here for almost a year, and have lost 27lbs. I have struggled with all the things you have mentioned here and honestly there is no quick fix. You just have to decide to do it and do it in a way that you can sustain for life. If you go in with the idea that this is a diet then it wont work. Trust me I have felt the frustration and cried the tears, the self loathing at not having the will power. The fast food has been a killer. It is convenient right? It tastes good right? It's easy to pull into a drive in and just get it. I decided to go cold turkey and that was it no more fast food!! Guess what hehe big ugly fast food binge 2 weeks later and I mean wow. So what to do...

Get yourself an awesome support group of friends here - seriously it is the one thing that stopped me from saying bugger it and giving up.

Set realistic goals. Take today and say TODAY I will make healthier choices and I wont have that Whopper (or whatever you vice is) Yes you can have it, and make it fit into your day but sometimes we just need to prove to ourselves that we have that self control and it gives us a feeling of success.

Don't count successes as lbs lost. Count them as logging your foods good or bad, walking a flight of stairs instead of taking the elevator, getting up 30 minutes earlier to get your walk or jog or whatever in. Those are successes the lbs will follow.

Those are all little changes everyone of us can make. and lastly DON"T QUIT.

I have a friend on mfp and at the start I expressed my frustrations to him, He asked me what I wanted from this? What do you guys want?

The words that left a lasting impression on me were along the lines of this.

"I see people joining this site, full of enthusiasm and motivation, making big changes in eating and exercise, then things don't happen how they expect it to, the weight doesn't come off as fast as they think it should. They get frustrated, and a few months later, they're gone, just disappear. Are you going to be one of those people?" (thanks Pu x)

Think about that. Are you going to be one of those people?

YOU ARE WORTH it, it takes time and it takes patience but you CAN do it, it isn't easy, if it was we would all be super fit and slim hehe.

:flowerforyou:

LMT2012

I am no doctor, but I would guess the obsessive thoughts would respond to medicine. There is still stigma attached to taking anti depressants, but they are sometimes prescribed for things other than textbook depression, with wonderful results.
Please see a doctor and get a leg up on this. Try a gastroenterologist or your obgyn. Those are both specialists that see a LOT of what you are describing.
You don't get any points (as far as I know) for suffering.

IHTSM

yea I am taking cipralex now for anxiety, I was very skeptical at first, but it has helped my head a bit. Though the binging hasn't stopped.

LMT2012

ask about straight up old fashioned Prozac. Can take months to kick in, but mostly likely will help your mind get off of the merry go round. You can't make healthy choices until that stops.

JoshS_usmc

For the ones that have a problem with sweet cravings, something that I've done to help that is taking chromium picolinate. I can't remeber the exact dose but it was recomended to me by a trainer back home before I enlisted and i finally got around to trying it, and it seems to be working well. I lost my password to my old account so i had to start a new one recently for those that want to look at my progress. I'm a self proclaimed binge eater which started with wrestling back in H.S. I've noticed that certain foods trigger my binges(i.e. peanutbutter) if i limit myself to those foods maybe once every couple weeks it seems to keep me on track.

IHTSM

Man, what a roller coaster this is.

In one way I wonder if "food addiction" really does "exist" - I mean, there seems to be a label/disorder for every tiny thing out there. However, I didn't know that not everyone had this particular struggle with food. Previously, I had assumed that we all have to fight the "eat me" voices and that larger people just had louder voices to fend off, or were just not as good at it the fight (like myself).

I suppose putting a label on it might help, at least to realize that this is my struggle and there is something genetically or psychologically behind it... But at the same time it makes me feel more like its beyond my control and makes me a little more depressed and helpless.

This is my struggle, this is my life. One day at a time. I guess it could be something worse, right?

Iamblessed9572

I feel the same as you. I do good for a couple of days of constant fighting and then I get so tired or something happens in my life that sends me over the edge and I binge. Feeling terrible and depressed and like a failure. It is a vicious cycle. I have dabbled in the OA forums at www.therecoverygroup.org. They seem to understand the struggle and can offer support. Other people have found help from the addiction with obsession to food. I still have not. But I keep reading and praying that something will click along the way.

Hadunka

How many calories do you eat daily? Do you eat back your burnt calories?

karenmi

I'm a big believer in cognitive behaviour therapy vs taking anti depressants and can speak from first-hand experience that it works. I have mild OCD (obsessive thoughts and anxiety) that I was able to overcome with the help of a great therapist. Drugs do help some people but can also be like a bandage, just masking the symptoms enough to get you through the day. It's been proven that CBT is the best way to treat a lot of mental illnesses.

It's a lot more work than popping a pill, but the tools you will learn during the process will remain yours for life. It's been over 3 years since my last OCD episodes and life is so much better!

Good luck in your journey!

lobo_a_gogo

It sounds like when you "relapse" you're giving up rather than learning from mistakes. What I mean by this is...

What should happen "Oh crap, I gave into my craving and had 3 slices of pizza for dinner instead of eating healthier. I'm 400 calories over my goal. I'll work harder tomorrow, stay on goal, and make sure I work out."


What you do "Oh crap, I gave into my craving and had 3 slices of pizza for dinner. I might as well finish the pizza and have some dessert since my day is ruined."

The more you obsess over it and beat yourself up about it, the worse it will get. I'm not saying that you shouldn't be vigilant, but I'm saying you should forgive yourself and learn from your mistakes. Often we get triggered by certain situations to eat foods we're trying to avoid.

For example: My fiance who I live with is a tall skinny boy with a fast metabolism. Last night he wanted to order pizza. I know that generally when he orders a cheese pizza, even if I've eaten all my calories, I usually negotiate with myself to have one slice. Last night I told him to put chicken on it (I'm a vegetarian) so that I would not be tempted.

Learn from mistakes, don't beat yourself up over them.

msdominance

I can relate. there are several factors that have helped me.

1) lots of praying and crying (releasing emotions)
2) I'm on a weight loss plan the requires that I speak to nutrition experts weekly and they are accessible to me daily if I need them (MediFast)

I find the more that I talk about how the food/hunger/cravings make me feel (anxious, happy, sad even nervous) I start to put puzzle pieces together and connect them to issues in my past that I didn't think were issues.

I personally feel this will be a forever journey. I will never get to a point where my tug of war with food isn't present. It's just how I deal. Everyone deals with life differently. My goal is to always find the trigger and either eliminate it or figure out another way to deal instead of eating. I hold things in too much.

You'll find your alternative to eating... it's a difficult life long journey and every trigger may need a different response. Facing it head on every time no matter how hard is what helps you move forward.

PS keep caring and supportive people close to you.

ninerbuff

Doesn't sound like you have "food addiction" as much as you have an "eating disorder". Identifying what the real problem is leads to solution. IMO, you should speak to a specialist on eating disorders.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

drm180now

I think you are doing wonderfully in terms of getting your weight down and stayig fit. All of the folks above have given you some great ideas about controlling the mood swing rollercoaster ride of addiction. You can get help through a counselor and maybe some medication to help with your OCD.

What I dont see in your messages is any sense of a spiritural attitude. We all need to start out with a forgiving attitude toward ourselves that we are imperfect and have a mission to move toward health. Your pictures reveals that you are a beautiful person with a handsome boyfriend and in that sense, very fortunate. Now you simply have to stop beating yourself up for the difficulties inherent in struggloing with addiction and adopt a charitable loving perspective which recognizes how far you have come. You are not all the way there yet, but will resolve your crises in time with the help of others.

In the meantime, look at yourself in the mirror and realize you are imperfect, but improving child of God. You have beauty, energy and youth going for you. Look into a little spiritual growth to complement your physical and psychological achievements.

allshebe

I've only truly "binged" when I was pregnant, but before I "found" MFP I did have a bad habit of continually dipping into a (large) bag of tortilla chips as I was driving home from work - never realizing that every "handful" was adding over 100 calories to my daily tally. I had to log a day's food for an online class I took - ate healthy for that day and realized that if I ate like that every day, I should lose weight. MFP had been mentioned in discussion of the food logging exercise, so I tried it and the weight has been coming off quite nicely.

You seem to have some obsession about food. There are several approaches that can work:
1. Something like the "twelve step" AA aproach - going "cold turkey" and saying no one minute at a time - "I choose not to eat "that" right now". Eventually you get to hours and days and weeks and years. You forgive yourself if you "fall" and start again. It helps to have some sort of support system - someone you can actually call when you feel close to falling.
2. Therapy- all sorts of possibilities, what works for one person may not for another. Sometimes you have to try different therapists or even different therapy approaches before you find what works for you.
3. Drugs - work for some - sometimes work short term until you can change your habits, other times need to be taken more or less forever. Therapy may help the drugs work better. Not everybody responds to the same drug regimen and not everybody will get results right away

A combination of all three may be the best way to go. Talk to your doctor about your current drug therapy and discuss when you should see real results or if a change in meds is needed. Ask about therapy options as well. There are overeaters groups based on AA program - see if there is a local chapter. Always here, but internet may not get you as prompt a response as you may need at times.

GoneLbsGirl

You say that you see a doctor and a nutritionist. Have you discussed how you are feeling with them? If so, have they offered solutions for you? I have been diagnosed with anxiety and OCD. There is this thing called "monkey brain" where thoughts are constant (and exhausting). There are ways to quiet your thoughts with meditation, tapping and breathing techniques. Maybe you should look into trying some of these.

Additionally, In lieu of doing something food related, maybe you and your friends can sign up for pottery classes, manis and pedis, learn a language, or volunteer. Just to get you out and do something to take your mind off of the constant thoughts.

Ultimately (which I am in the process of learning), food should only be used to provide nutrients/fuel for your body. It is not your friend or confidant. Don't be so hard on yourself. Know that you were brave and strong enough to realize this is a problem that you want to combat and you will! My thoughts are with you. GOOD LUCK!

Momjogger

I feel like our struggles are very similar. I have nothing to contribute; was just hoping for some advice as well. Fast food is my worst offense.

I cook all my food at home now. I used be a HUGE fast food person. Now, I found the healthy food I like and take the time to plan and precook. I make my own coffee - so no more temptation at the coffee shop. I have a smoothie for breakfaast, or make my own veggie omelette, or run out the door with a boiled egg and banana. I precook a batch of soup on Sunday for the week, or precook chicken and make a big salad and portion it for the next couple of days, or I make extra dinner and take leftovers. I figure out how to make my favorite restaurant dishes low cal, etc. It sounds like a lot of work, but you just start tweeking and over time you are making big changes. Eating before you are really hungry is key, because if you wait too long you'll just eat anything. Good luck and I know you can do it, because I did, and trust me, I am nothing special.

vim_n_vigor

How many calories do you eat a day? Are you eating enough to truly fuel your body? Are you classifying foods as bad that maybe you shouldn't be?

Momjogger

Food addiction is right. Here's what I know about me (maybe I will help). 1. I have to track my calories, because if I have a bad day, when I track, I see it is not as bad as I thought, tomorrow is a new day, etc. IT REALLY WORKS, and keeps me from giving up. 2. I CANNOT undereat. IT MAKES ME BINGE. Sooo, I eat back some of my exercise calories and NEVER eat under 1400 calories a day. NEVER. 3. I DO NOT have trigger foods in my house (or I will eat them. I ALWAYS eat them eventually), but I may indulge in something, especially if I have been thinking about it for a couple of days. Like driving to Hilliards for one sea salt caramel and one piece of toffee bark. I would NEVER get a box, cuz I would eat it ALL. 4. I try not to eat processed carbs or starchy carbs as a rule, but I usually have one thing a day. These things rev up my insulin reaction and desire for more. I usually stick to oatmeal for breakfast, or a 100 calorie English muffin, one serving of goldfish crackers, etc. and I eat them with a meal, not as a snack. My healthy go to snacks are usually fruit or yogurt as a rule. 5. I know my trigger food. Chips, bread, pasta, pizza, sweets, etc Even weird things like granola bars, so I try to stay away, but when I do indulge, and I do, I try to do it in a setting where I can't overindulge and I share them. 6. I try to eat a lot of protein, veggies, and fruit. 7. Super important for me as a woman. I plan to eat more calories when my hormones make me super hungry so I don't binge because I have been restricting myself too much. So I don't lose that week, at least I am happy and am not gaining either. Guess what? There are three more weeks left in the month to lose weight in and since this is a journey, not a destination, that works for me. I wish you love, peace, happiness, and hope.

stormin4

The best advice I have received from my trainer is that "food is fuel, nothing more." If you can learn to view food as a fuel then you can stop using it as a reward and a punishment. Good luck with your struggles!

Nessiechickie

I use to be bad for some of that stuff that you mentioned.
Best thing that worked for me was starting to eat more and healthier as well if I want a burger I get a burger but
that does not mean two and everyday.
With eating more I find I don't binge.
I rarely exercise but starting to bring it back into my day so I have increased my food even more for that.
Hope that helps.

beattie1

Are you restricting yourself too much? Only eating "healthy" foods? It's not realistic to think you can live your whole life on a "diet". You have to allow for foods you love, things you crave and just teach yourself portion control. I'd go crazy if I could never have fast food, or chocolate, or chips or any of the other "bad" foods again.

Work out your budget and plan treats within it. You may need to fight the urge to binge but maybe if you know that you can have a reasonable amount of the foods you want on a regular basis it will help subdue the voice that tells you to eat.

This is correct - I think you're trying TOO hard. You need to find a moderate way of eating that lets you eat some of what you want so that you don't go mental and binge.

Momjogger

I am in a similar boat, i started dieting about 8 weeks ago and havent been losing anything, i go to the gym about 3-4 times per week and eat three healthy meals per day with raw almonds and berries for snacks 3 hours between my meals.. it all goes well and next thing i no i am stuffing my face with crisps or chocolate.

if i get a pang for chocolate i will drive myself crazy with the idea of getting it, so justify it to myself by getting it now rather than thinking about it for 3 hours and then getting it anyway.

I end up eating a bit on the weekends and wanted some tips on helping stop the naughty stuff when i love the healthy stuff so much!

I started this healthy lifestyle thing to get in shape for summer but at this rate nothing will have changed.

Help anyone?

I was always a big exerciser and never lost weight. Exercise makes you hungry! I think my eating always kept pace with me exercise until I consciously decided to track everything. You have to track your calories with the program daily and eat back some of your exercise calories, but not all (it will help counteract bad days, but keep you from bingeing because you are so hungry. 1200 calories is for the birds!). Eat chocolate. You may be one of those people that need to eat four Hershey kisses a day (or something). Just factor it into your daily intake. Say, OK, chocolate later, so green beans instead of a baked potato with dinner, etc. And most importantly know it is a journey. Just do the program and don't worry about the outcome. Have faith. It will happen if you keep tracking the calories. Just don't worry about when. Sounds like you are impatient like me, but I want to make changes and keep the weight off, so I just keep tracking. So far, so good. Don't give up.

shmoony

I noticed in your profile you are a vegan. Just curious, what kind of unhealthy foods can you binge on as a vegan?

gallingers06

This may help... I took an Intuitive Eating class and it changed the way I see food. I took away it's power and now I enjoy it more. A lot of reading, but good info. Good luck! :flowerforyou:
Stages of Intuitive Eating
10 Principles of Intuitive Eating
1. Reject the Diet Mentality Throw out the diet books and magazine articles that offer you false hope of losing weight quickly, easily, and permanently. Get angry at the lies that have led you to feel as if you were a failure every time a new diet stopped working and you gained back all of the weight. If you allow even one small hope to linger that a new and better diet might be lurking around the corner, it will prevent you from being free to rediscover Intuitive Eating.
2. Honor Your Hunger Keep your body biologically fed with adequate energy and carbohydrates. Otherwise you can trigger a primal drive to overeat. Once you reach the moment of excessive hunger, all intentions of moderate, conscious eating are fleeting and irrelevant. Learning to honor this first biological signal sets the stage for re-building trust with yourself and food.
3. Make Peace with Food Call a truce, stop the food fight! Give yourself unconditional permission to eat. If you tell yourself that you can't or shouldn't have a particular food, it can lead to intense feelings of deprivation that build into uncontrollable cravings and, often, bingeing When you finally “give-in” to your forbidden food, eating will be experienced with such intensity, it usually results in Last Supper overeating, and overwhelming guilt.
4. Challenge the Food Police .Scream a loud "NO" to thoughts in your head that declare you're "good" for eating under 1000 calories or "bad" because you ate a piece of chocolate cake. The Food Police monitor the unreasonable rules that dieting has created . The police station is housed deep in your psyche, and its loud speaker shouts negative barbs, hopeless phrases, and guilt-provoking indictments. Chasing the Food Police away is a critical step in returning to Intuitive Eating.
5. Respect Your Fullness Listen for the body signals that tell you that you are no longer hungry. Observe the signs that show that you're comfortably full. Pause in the middle of a meal or food and ask yourself how the food tastes, and what is your current fullness level?
6. Discover the Satisfaction Factor The Japanese have the wisdom to promote pleasure as one of their goals of healthy living In our fury to be thin and healthy, we often overlook one of the most basic gifts of existence--the pleasure and satisfaction that can be found in the eating experience. When you eat what you really want, in an environment that is inviting and conducive, the pleasure you derive will be a powerful force in helping you feel satisfied and content. By providing this experience for yourself, you will find that it takes much less food to decide you've had "enough".
7. Honor Your Feelings Without Using Food Find ways to comfort , nurture, distract, and resolve your issues without using food. Anxiety, loneliness, boredom, anger are emotions we all experience throughout life. Each has its own trigger, and each has its own appeasement. Food won't fix any of these feelings. It may comfort for the short term, distract from the pain, or even numb you into a food hangover. But food won't solve the problem. If anything, eating for an emotional hunger will only make you feel worse in the long run. You'll ultimately have to deal with the source of the emotion, as well as the discomfort of overeating.
8. Respect Your Body Accept your genetic blueprint. Just as a person with a shoe size of eight would not expect to realistically squeeze into a size six, it is equally as futile (and uncomfortable) to have the same expectation with body size. But mostly, respect your body, so you can feel better about who you are. It's hard to reject the diet mentality if you are unrealistic and overly critical about your body shape.
9. Exercise--Feel the Difference Forget militant exercise. Just get active and feel the difference. Shift your focus to how it feels to move your body, rather than the calorie burning effect of exercise. If you focus on how you feel from working out, such as energized, it can make the difference between rolling out of bed for a brisk morning walk or hitting the snooze alarm. If when you wake up, your only goal is to lose weight, it's usually not a motivating factor in that moment of time.
10 Honor Your Health--Gentle Nutrition Make food choices that honor your health and tastebuds while making you feel well. Remember that you don't have to eat a perfect diet to be healthy. You will not suddenly get a nutrient deficiency or gain weight from one snack, one meal, or one day of eating. It's what you eat consistently over time that matters, progress not perfection is what counts.

koshkasmum

Dear OP. Everyone has a food addiction. None of us can live without it. Luckily for most of us, we can exercise judgement when it comes to our relationship with food and manage to mostly just eat what we need (as opposed to what we might want, like cheesecake every day for breakfast).

Some folks, however have difficulty getting on top of it and have to either feel in total control (like by refusing to eat at all, or in impossibly tiny amounts) or out of control, which is terrifying. This is what an eating disorder is. Please seek help from a doctor or clinic that specializes in eating disorders as the fight is damaging to both your body and your mind.

The folks on MFP care, but I think you need more help than we, as well meaning laypeople can give you.

Good luck and good health.