Where I find my inspiration...

iamlaprell

So I started this journey in January and although I'd spent most of my adult life putting on weight I just never seemed to care about losing weight. That's not to say that I didn't feel horribly about the way I looked but it's so much easier to avoid those things that make you feel bad about it than it was to care about losing. I fully embraced the fact that if people did not like you then they could just go to "well you know" and it never bothered me because I believe in loving people for who they are, not who you want them to be. So I surrounded myself with those who loved me for the strength of my character regardless of the package it came in. Where I did find difficulty was in dating new people and in trying on clothes. I just found ways around that, I only dated people who were the ones who cared about who I was and not what I looked like and I have to say that I've never made a better decision because today the friends I have are the people who loved me then, ya know. I also found that I could wear maternity clothes because they fit my apple shape so well and the draping does amazing work at hiding those problem areas.

So I'm not sure what happened to make me change, I mean I honestly just woke up one day with the desire to get in shape. And I can honestly say that my weight has never been more important to me than it is now that I'm getting rid of it. I have however had difficulty in maintaining my motivation so I had to learn to find ways to motivate myself. So while I have friends who seem to need encouragement on a daily basis and I try really hard to be there for them, sometimes I just want to say "I CANNOT DO IT FOR YOU!" because I honestly believe that we must find the strength in ourselves. I do find motivation by seeing the success of others, but there isn't much anyone can say to me that makes more of a difference than what I can do for myself. That being said, there are ways that I can recommend to others that work for me, the things that inspire me may inspire others. I find inspiration in....

Imagining myself wearing something skin tight and rocking it like nobody's business
Dancing in that same dress in front of my favorite singer and seeing him give me that look only he can give
Being arm candy for that same guy (to me there is nothing greater than a man wanting to show you off)
Being able to run away if my life is in danger (three months ago I would have gotten a bullet in the back but now just maybe I can run far enough and fast enough to get away if someone is threatening me)
Being able to hike to the top of a mountain and get rewarded with a view that few people ever get to see
Being able to wear a bikini for the first time since I was 16
Being able to shop in the regular side of my favorite stores
Being able to buy clothes because the cute ones are always sold out in my "previous" size
I can actually wear heels without my feet going numb!
Being able to wear flats without my belly bulging out!
My sex drive is coming back and to me that's a huge victory!
Wanting to go out and enjoy myself, I'd reached a point where I preferred hiding indoors, even during parties!
Being able to say what I want without fear of someone thinking I'm a fat bitter *****! It's amazing just how those judgemental looks hurt when you speak your mind and people devalue your opinion because you're not attractive.
Just the fact that I want to show off my new body! I am so proud of my results that anytime someone asks for advice I'm not ashamed to send them my horribly embarrassing before pic because I know that I will never look like that again!

Those are some of the things that inspire me to keep going! So to all those out there who are looking for ways to keep going I hope this helps and even though I find value in having others tell me inspiring stories about their journeys and seeing others amazing results really pushes me to work harder, I still think that you have to find your own inspiration because it is those things that will keep you going!

TayaCurragh

I totally agree that you have to do it for you, not for other people. It's great that you have so much to inspire you, what a nice long list, inspiration is so important. Personally I have a blog where I post healthy recipes, cute clothes I want to wear etc., as well as doing it with a friend which really helps! Congrats on the progress so far and good luck!

vgpeterson1984

Wonderful post....sometimes you can only help yourself.