It's a new day!!!

valarielala

Hello out there! My name is Valarie, and I'm a 45 year old fat chick. I am the medically healthy person with great labs and am busy and active and I don't get sick often and being fat wasn't "a big deal". Until one day I was doing the typical aerobics to get my button fastened on my fattest jeans and I realized I needed more clothes. I'm not a typical girlie girl who spends a lot of time (money!) on clothes, so it's kind of a big deal when I do shop. Like, getting over the mental hurdle. So i went shopping. You know what? Fat girl clothes suck. They're ugly and tent-y and very very decidedly UN-cute. So in July of 2011, I decided I wanted to lose weight. To be able to buy cute clothes. I didn't care if they were the largest size in the cute, but I wanted cute.

I joined weight watchers and found a great support network there. I did lose weight but the tracking of points and their whole system was very time consuming for me. WW and I didn't gel very well. So I gained back most of the 18 pounds I lost (I started at 245 and I'm 5'0. Beach ball. Good times being me). I didn't do much for the next 10 months or so because life had me by the balls and I just didn't make time. Then I decided that I "needed" a really fast initial weight loss to give me "momentum" to do the really hard work and looked into Ideal Protein. A thousand bucks later, throwing up more than I did while pregnant, and still not losing the metric ton that I needed to lose, I stopped that. (I know a lot of people have success with IP but I was disgusted by the food and I found the office where I live to be unsupportive). I'm still pissed about the money because that grand would buy a LOT of cute clothes! Then I got a little depressed at the whole process. I decided I was just going to be fat and that was that.

Then I saw an advertisement for a gym. Something about it was compelling. Oh yeah, it was the "where the only exercise machine is YOU" slogan. Huh, this means I've got all the equipment I need. So I stopped in and had my mind frigging blown. I haven't ever worked out so hard in my life. It was hard. it was grueling. It was less than an hour. I felt AMAZING! Something like crossfit, HIIT, etc. Totally rocked. I got to talking to the gym owners and they were so amazing and supportive, I kept going back. Then I watched Fat Sick and Nearly Dead. My husband and I bought a juicer and loved it. We never ate so many vegetables. Then I dragged him to the gym, and he's got a couple of busted up legs that will never stop hurting him, but he loved it too! We started to research exercise and food. We really started to look at the food we ate. We watched every single documentary there is on Netflix about food. Yes, they all have an agenda and they all have their twist, but there was a theme: whole food, plant based diets are something to consider.

So we went drastic. We literally cleaned out our cupboards and our fridge. We threw out (or gave away) all processed foods, sugar, flours, boxed crap, canned crap, all of it. We stood and looked at our empty cupboards and said, Well....let's go shopping! We loaded up with tons of veggies, fruits, grains, nuts, seeds, fake meat, fake cheese, milk alternatives, tofu, and eggs. We were winging a lot of this, but we had a pretty good idea of what we wanted to do. We detoxed. We feel AMAZING!!!

So here I am, finally feeling good about the food I put in my body (and no we don't say we're vegetarian or vegan, but that is mostly the world we live in; we recognize that denial is the path to failure). And I've lost almost 30 pounds since December. I want to keep losing weight and I need to keep losing weight. I don't care (as much) about the cute clothes at this point. I realized that I was subconsciously terrified of heart disease and cancer. Both of my parents died from these things four years ago. I realized that food IS my medicine and unless I want to check out of this life prematurely, I need to get to the doctor (myself). So that's me in a nutshell, where I've been, and where I am.

On a personal note, I am married to my best friend who loves me for everything I am (a good reason why being fat was never a problem for me; he thinks I'm hot and sexy no matter what) and between us, we have four adult kids. We also own and operate a family business which is a sub sandwich shop. We're not our own best customers, but it is tempting to be around our great food at times. The greatest part of this journey for me has been having my husband right by my side. Together, we've been able to bring consciousness to our life and that has brought great joy.

Btw? Today is a really up day. I have PLENTY of poor pitiful me moments, which is why I want to be part of a community that will be supportive, kind, encouraging, and drag me back to reality. Thanks for reading!