Sensitive Question

joneswife09

First off I want to say that I do not mean anything bad by asking this question and please don't misinterpret me. I am just really curious about this. My question is to those who need to lose 100 lbs or more. I do not have that much to lose, but I have about 30 to lose. I just wondered what keeps you motivated to lose. Are you setting small goals? Are you breaking things down? How are you handling the weight loss. I know that with my 30 lbs it seemed (seems) crazy to think that I could ever hit my goal (bc I never have to this point). I just wondered how others handle this situation. Once again thanks for honest answers and this is not meant to offend anyone.

cdavis1126

I set small goals for myself, get to the next 10 lbs. I also participate in 8 week challenges with my food program, myfoodlovers.com, which helps set small goals. I started at 294 in October and am down to 225. Wanting to lose weight and exercising is great but without an actual food plan, it's easy to stray off track. I am now going to the gym every day, three days a week, I go twice. Once for weight training in the morning and then back in the afternoon for cardio. I track all my food, water and exercise on here. I do not consider this a diet, it's a life style change.

I take no offense from you asking these questions. Whether it's 100 lbs or 30 lbs, we are all in this together. I never planned to gain all that weight but I do plan to never gain in back. I've got about 80 more lbs to go to reach my long term goal. Right now I'm concentrating on getting to 200, that's my focus right now. Only 25 lbs to go. We all have to work the same to lose the weight no matter how much we have to lose.

lknorthstar

I had 60 to lose and that seemed to be a long ways away, but I just set small goals and went from there! That made it a bit easier then trying for one big one!

KendalBeee

I simply want to be healthy. 230 pounds is not healthy (I was at 260). I feel that my body cannot do the things I want it to do. I want my body to match my personality. I feel like I hold back a lot because I'm so self concious of my size. So instead of sitting around WANTING and THINKING about being thin, I get off my butt and do something about it. Since I have a lot of weight to lose, I know it will take a long time for it to come off. I've been stuck at 230 for over 6 weeks now. I've gone through some personal issues in the last 6 months, but I'm still not discouraged.


If losing weight was easy, everyone would be thin.

leavinglasvegas

I only had 85 pound to lose and I have 36 to go. My motivation came from just the sheer desire to be comfortable in my own body.

I never really focused to much on the numbers, but I did focus on all the jeans in my closet. As I gained weight I kept my old jeans because I never expected to gain so much and have a hard time losing it. So my closet has my jeans in order from size 6-16. As I lose, I move down the line.

I'm halfway thrugh now and it is the best feeling EVER! I'm not worried about motivation anymore because everything is just falling into place. Every couple weeks I grab another pair and try them on. Then I judge how I'm doing. I weight myself more now, just because I've not seen these numbers in a few years and it excites me.

But for the most part, my success is being measured by my clothes. Even when a new pair fits, I can tell my progress by how they look on me. Its always exciting when they first fit, but its even more exciting when they start to look good, then they start to feel loose, then they are too big. So much better that the scale!

bethinagain

:flowerforyou: Setting goals is great and all, but true sucess is finding a new way of grocery shopping and preparing foods. Along with proper food choices at restaurants. My motivation is driven by my "calorie game" with MFP. I look at calorie counting as a game! Everyday I want to see if I win by not going over my calories allowed.

We both are very close with our weight loss goals. I started at 186 and want to get down to 140. I've already lost 24 pounds (in 4 months) with little effort. MFP has taught me the "trick of the trade", meaning recipes, workouts, food choices etc..... Stay connected with the community, read and respond to as many threads as possible. That's where you will find the modivation to reach your ultimate goal. View before and after pics, that's the best motivation.

Good Luck and most important make it fun! Situations are what you make of them!

sonjavon

Ya know - I appreciate you asking this question. I don't think you're in the minority... I think most people who don't have as much to lose can't imagine what it must be like to have over 100 lbs to lose. Just like I can't imagine what it would be like to have several hundred to lose.

I think we do it a lot like you do... one day at a time.
I actually posted a blog post this morning about this... sort of. I remind myself every day that I am not as fat today as I was yesterday and especially not as fat as the day that I started. I started this journey in March 2009 and I had several months that I didn't do anything to lose... and gained back 20 of the 30 lbs that I lost... it was an eye opener to come back and see some of the people that I was friends with actually near or at goal weight.

I set some mini goals - usually around "events". I'm going to Colorado to see my sister in June. I want new clothes... and I want them in the smallest size possible.

I try not to focus on my "goal weight" - because honestly... I don't have a firm goal weight. The weight that everything SAYS I should weight is less than I weighed in 4th grade.... so I can't even imagine what I would look like at that weight. Ya know?

I focus on health more than anything... making good choices and learning how to eat properly. I don't think I ever knew HOW to eat properly... I thought I did... but I didn't. I focus on making more good choices today than I did yesterday. I've lost 34 lbs and it's not totally obvious to most people... but I can tell, my husband can tell and that's what REALLY matters to me.

I blog for motivation. When I have really good upbeat days - I write what I'm feeling and on not-so-good days... I go back and read. It's definitely a journey... physically, mentally and spiritually for me. I'm realizing HOW I got so out of control and dealing with issues that I had drowned in food. I think as the mental and spiritual burdens are being dealt with - the physical weight just melts away.

Thinwithin2010

I myself am just begining on my journet for 100 plus. I have always done small goal's of 10 pounds and many time's have gotten to 30+ 40+ and have always messed it up for myself. It has always been Weight Watchers but I would stop going . It became boring to a point listening to the same people every week and the same things they didnt understand and after going awhile you start to hate it. The program is good, don't get me wrong. I just had enough.. So now I am here and it seems refreshing to have such a big variety of people and I can sit home on my computer at my convience. If I want to be on in the morn or evening it is my choice. No more not eating till weigh-in time at 10 am.. Plus on here there is alot more personal things shared that most times never get talked about in a WW meeting. You actually get the sense of this being one big family of people trying to get healthy for one reason or another...I pray this is my time! My family support's me and I am ready!! I would never take offence to your question. Because the whole purpose of this site is to share and support each other and by you asking that you might have helped a very new dieter answer something they wondered about themselves. Thanks for asking, Kathy

joneswife09

Thank you all for your answers. It's eye opening to see how lives are being changed my this new way of life. From each one of your comments I can tel that you are completely different people now -- than when you started. The confidence that comes with knowing we are doing something good for our bodies is such a motivation to me! I just want to state that I love this website -- I love the people here. Everyone is so honest and this is probably one of the few places I can take honest answers :laugh: People on here could pretty much say anything to me and I know that they are only trying to help me become stronger. I love it!

Cayla

Thinwithin2010

Bethinagain, You have all those children and still in diapers? God Bless you momma! You rock! :drinker:

bellinachuchina

For me, I always had in my head "135, 135, 135"...."size 8, size 8, size 8". That was my goal, & until I accomplished it, I wasn't satisfied. In my mind, this was a journey for me, and I didn't expect to reach it in the time frame I did. I considered this a life long battle of mine and decided I wouldn't concentrate on dates/mini goals, & rather be focused on losing until I saw the numbers I wanted. So if that meant it takes me 5 years to reach my goal, fine, but I wouldn't stop until then. I spent the entirety of my life chubby, thick, fat, whatever you want to call it, so dedicating my life to changing that was beyond worth it. Of course there were points where I felt like giving up, that's natural, but after having those brief moments, I then I envisioned my hot self at 135, and reminded myself of my motivations. I accomplished my goal in one year, and I don't think I could have done it in that period, if I wasn't constantly thinking about the ultimate end result. Best of luck to everyone! Think*Believe*Achieve

tutujoli

About a year ago I had kind of a revelation. If I had stuck with it even ONE of the time I was trying to lose weight but gave up because I was losing "too slow."....I would be at (and enjoying) my goal weight already.

So for me the motivation is the big goal. lol Little goals make me impatient to get there. It's easier for me to be patient with a 100 lb loss than with a 10 lb loss.

I also had my life sort of SLAMMED into perspective this year. Our house burnt down in October and we were all sound alseep when it started. I realized how many things I was not doing that I could be. (Everyone was fine and we're back in our rebuilt home now. :happy: )

oliveoil7979

It may be strange for some of you to read this answer, but other than setting a weight I would like to be, I have not been focusing on that number. My one real goal at the moment is the marathon in December I want to run. I have been running small 5K and soon 10k races every month to keep me motivated. But because of the focus I have on this, it led me to quit smoking because it affected my breathing while I was running. Next I changed my eating habits because they too were affecting my racing. Then I cut out sodas and sugary drinks and only drank water because I needed to stay hydrated.

Because of all these changes the weight is coming off with out me even thinking about it.

I have tried dieting before...it never worked. This isn't about dieting or losing weight. My goals are bigger than that. I wanted to change my lifestyle. I know some poeple have goals that they want to weigh a certain amount by a certain date, but those goals don't work for me. I get discouraged and eventually give up when I focus on being a certain number and a certain size. Staying active and eating right, and thinking of myself as a woman, wife and mother, (and not a number on a scale) are the only things I have found that keep me motivated enough to feel like I will complete that 26.2 mile race in December.

That doesn't mean that I don't have those moments when I freak out because I have gained a pound from my last weigh in. But my husband just keeps telling me that he would rather me be healthy than skinny. If at the end of my journey I weigh 145 instead of 135, but my cholestoral is healthy, and my blood pressure is normal, then I am not going to stress too much about thsoe pounds.

I am not sure if I answered your question or not, but I hope I helped.

lilmissy2

I think very generally speaking, people come in 2 categories:

Those who have lost weight before (and now regained it) and are motivated by the fact that they know they can do it

or

Those who have never lost weight and are amazed at what their bodies can actually do! Seeing those numbers drop down each week can be incredible motivation to keep at it, even if you have a long way to go

Of course people will find their own unique motivations but I think the underlying key is just believing that you are doing it and you can make it.

4me2sibiai

Great question! Thank you for posing it because it made me think hard.

Losing 100+ pounds cannot be the focus, at least personally. I am striving for the 2 lbs a week, knowing that this is a long term goal which will have plateaus, frustrations, moments of sheer excitement, and most of all, finding myself athletic self again as I shed the weight. I've accepted that some weeks I may go up and others I may lose 3 lbs but the body fluxuates and I understand that now. NOBODY sets out to be 100 lbs overweight or more. It's kind of a silent cocoon and then one day there is a moment in time a reality check happens. This can be at ANY WEIGHT (not just people 100lbs+). I can speak from personal experience that there are many words to "pad" (or make excuses for) the weight gain. However, not being able to do something, being uncomfortable, not being able to tie a sneaker, or getting winded going up stairs...whatever it is to each person...becomes a very real motivator.

I know my mindset. If I say "I want to lose half my weight by x date", (which I've done before), a strange thing happens. There is a panic button that goes off that starts scolding my inner self and then it starts a vicious cycle. Ultimately, I wind up gaining. This is very honest. Starting two months ago, I shifted my mindset and decided to approach the reshaping of my body using kindness, motivation, excitement and understanding. Every small success - whether it's getting all of my water in a day, or turning down a soda (that's HUGE), now becomes a "Success Mountain". Saying no to foods when I'm craving the sugar or soda and reminding myself of the elation I feel when I'm done walking or working out makes focusing on myself more important than the number I need to shed. My new mantra is "No More Diet - it's Do It!"

Going one step further, having this community with SO much support and kindness helps beyond words because some days the scale may not move, a mood will engulf the "can do it" attitude, the bloating feeling starts the mind chatter with really cruel words, the workout "hurts", but in the end it's about the small changes and the sense of inner pride knowing no one else ACCOMPLISHED THE SUCCESSES except YOU (each one of us.) The mind needs to hear, "I went to the gym", "I chose a better food", "I __ __" so I think your question is extremely personal for every single person, but in the long run, small steps yield big results.