Marriage - yea or nay?

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NormInv
NormInv Posts: 3,285 Member
in Chit-Chat
Whats the skinny on marriage? I was watching Louis CK standup on HBO last night and he said he has been divorced 5 years and those were the best 5 years of his life. He said, sure there are people who are in love and want to get married and they should because the best part about it is the divorce, and that be happy because divorce is forever. So I scratched my *kitten* and wondered whether marriage is just bills and inlaws.
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  • PaleoChocolateBear
    PaleoChocolateBear Posts: 2,844 Member
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    Not sure but Louis CK is hilarous
  • MBNagel74
    MBNagel74 Posts: 444 Member
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    Guess it all depends... Divorce was definitely the best part of my first marriage...
  • JustCallMe_Tanya_Eh
    JustCallMe_Tanya_Eh Posts: 954 Member
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    A divorce party is wayyyyy better than a marriage
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
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    The piece of paper doesn't mean anything to me. There's either true choice to be together, or not. I would never stay out of obligation and wouldn't want him to either. I left my first husband and never regretted it.
  • Chris99mu
    Chris99mu Posts: 352 Member
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    Whats the skinny on marriage? I was watching Louis CK standup on HBO last night and he said he has been divorced 5 years and those were the best 5 years of his life. He said, sure there are people who are in love and want to get married and they should because the best part about it is the divorce, and that be happy because divorce is forever. So I scratched my *kitten* and wondered whether marriage is just bills and inlaws.

    Soooooo, is this a proposal, or am I misreading your cues......?

    Please reply.
  • ElizaRoche
    ElizaRoche Posts: 2,005 Member
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    nay... for me!, to each their own tho.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I felt so grown up when I got divorced.
  • 2stepscloser
    2stepscloser Posts: 2,900 Member
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    Louis CK is one of the best comedians!

    It all depends on what you're into...my marriage is more than bills and in-laws but its not for everybody
  • pobalita
    pobalita Posts: 741 Member
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    Nay for me too. I wouldn't want to ever give up the freedom it have now.
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
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    I've broken 2 engagements to 2 different people. The idea of being committed to someone for my whole life sounds lovely. But the idea of being obligated to be committed to someone for my whole life has scared me into giving the rings back both times. I can't guarantee a lifetime to anyone.

    I want my relationships to be based on freedom, not on restrictions and old promises. I want to grow freely. I want my partner to grow freely, even if it means he could grow away from me. It happens, and I'm ok with that.

    But you know what else happens? Sometimes you just stay with someone, and one day you wake up and realize you've been together for 20 years, but it feels like the blink of an eye because you're just happy going along together and not counting down to any particular moment in time. All along this person had the chance to leave, but he *chose* to stay - he wasn't obligated to. That is the type of relationship I want.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    One divorce was enough for me.

    No. Big emphatic loud messy NO.
  • JessicaN1979
    JessicaN1979 Posts: 142 Member
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    Marriage is a vow, a commitment between two people and can be a beautiful thing. Being with your best friend, waking up with them, going to sleep with them, always having your best friend to enjoy the good part of lives with and having them there to help you through the bad parts, is all worth it! People do not take marriage vows for what they mean anymore and it is a sad thing. I can say that I used to be one of those people, but have finally woken up and realized what marriage should be and what it means. It is not just a piece of paper, it is the meaning and feelings between the vows that you speak during the ceremony. It is truly when two should become one, it means having a partner for life and to me that is awesome. I have been married and unfortunately it was not to the love of my life, which I also think many people now marry too quickly (I again was one of these people) and now that I have met my true love, I know that this is my time for happiness. So, I say don't do it if you don't mean it and for those who celebrate divorce, it is quite sad! It is a failure no matter how you look at it and who likes to fail? Marriage should be celebrated, divorce should not!
  • Otterluv
    Otterluv Posts: 9,083 Member
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    Works for me, but I've lucked out so far.

    I'm certainly not going to judge people who say nay, I've seen lots of very justified divorces go down through the years.
  • LittleMiss_WillLoseIt
    LittleMiss_WillLoseIt Posts: 1,373 Member
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    I wasn't even married and the breakup is enough for me....I'll pass on the whole marriage thing for now.


    I watched it last night also and it was HILARIOUS!!
  • Thena81
    Thena81 Posts: 1,265 Member
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    yay! ive been with mine for almost 8 years and i cant imagine life without him :love: :flowerforyou: :smokin: :smooched: :heart: :drinker: :bigsmile: :blushing:
  • TrishaRN_74
    TrishaRN_74 Posts: 102 Member
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    My thoughts exactly Jessica! My first marriage didn't work out because we were so young and didn't really know ourselves, let alone each other. My second marriage has been better than I could have ever imagined it to be! I really did marry my best friend and I can't imagine my life without him in it. If you have to think about whether marriage is the right move or not, it's not because when it is right, it is SOOOO right.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    Nay for me - 47 and never married. I think a lot of people get married "because it's time" or because they don't want to be alone, and they don't take a lot of care in choosing a partner for long-term compatibility. I never understood all these people (sorry, mostly women) that post on forums or go on TV and tell people how effed up their relationship is but then say they want to marry that person anyway. I have nothing against marriage - my parents have been happily married for 50 years. But I'm not going to sign up for a lifetime with some guy that doesn't treat me right. Every boyfriend I've had has wanted to clip my wings instead of help me fly, so I choose to fly solo.
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
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    Yea for me but... and huuuuuuge but here... I'm not married to a total bag o' douches. I have no idea how people who are married to less than stellar characters live like that or even think it's okay to live like that. If you are married to the right person then it's the usual work but it's a lot of fun. I don't know what it's like to be unhappily married but I have no crapping clue how people do it.
  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,285 Member
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    People change. They should as they grow. And some say love is a choice. And you do wonder whether if you do not make the choice to love with the one you got, whether you could ever find it again, especially as you get older.
  • AmyMgetsfit
    AmyMgetsfit Posts: 636 Member
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    Doing a divorce registry at Target would be awesome. Then your friends could supply you with everything a new bachelor/bachelorette needs, booze, condoms, dna tests.

    I am pro marriage. I was lucky I got it right the first time. I would never do it again though if I found myself single, once is enough for me.

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