OMG How Do I Get Past The Stress To Lose The Weight!

cherakee68

I need all the help I can get and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I feel like I have road block after road block standing in my way. I'm not using as an excuse at all. I use to be extremely athletic. I'm at my highest weight ever right now at 188 and I'm totally miserable. I'm 45 and my Husband and I own our own Custom Paint Shop and I do Child Care and we Foster Rottie's and PItbulls & I do the interviews, references and vet checks on the potential adopters. I'm very busy all the time during the day with the kids and dogs. When the kids leave I'm so exhausted that I just want to sit and rest. Then it's time to make dinner and I'm done for. I've tried to talk to my Husband about going for hikes with me and walking but that gets me no where. He is skinny and can eat anything and believe me HE DOES. He says he doesn't want me skinny. I'm a long way from skinny and it's not about that. It's about feeling good on the inside and the outside for me. It just feels like I'm just going around in circles. Has anyone else had this problem and how do you get past it? I eat pretty well but the exercising is a hit and miss. HELP!

MinnieInMaine

Two things come to mind:

1) You don't need your husband to join you in exercise. Just go do it by yourself and he can stay home and watch the kids/dogs or take the kids and the dogs and leave him at home. A litle tough love...you say you're not using excuses but in this case you definitely are. If you want to do it, go do it.

2) You don't HAVE to exercise to lose weight. Watching your calorie intake is the most important thing. I know exercise helps becasue you can earn calories and eat more but with some careful planning and preparation, you can lose without exercise.

As far as finding the energy, that's a tough one. Sounds like you're pretty busy during the day! Make sure you're eating healthy, getting plenty of sleep and drinking plenty of water and see if any of that helps with your energy level.

RatherBeInTheShire

Gotta echo what Minni said.

You can't rely on someone else to "help" you lose weight. You have to want to do it, and you have to make time to do it. Don't start with somethingoverwhelming. Just start with little walks around the neighborhood a couple times a week. You will get there.

Querian

You are caught in a classic Catch 22 but I agree with the other posters that you don't need your husband in order to lose weight. Maybe you can take a foster dog out for a walk instead? It doesn't have to be a long walk but maybe if you fit in a couple of short walks throughout the day you would feel a lot better?

The other thing I will recommend is meditation. It might seem counter-intuitive but taking some time to release the stress would help you feel better so you could be more effective other times. Gandhi famously said: "I have so much to accomplish today that I must meditate for two hours instead of one."

And use MFP for support if your husband isn't supportive right now. Who knows, maybe he will come around when he sees how great you are doing!

Edited to add: maybe you need to take a hard look at all of your responsibilities and let something go? You can't make time for yourself if all your hours are packed full of other things to do.

lizziebeth1028

I need all the help I can get and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I feel like I have road block after road block standing in my way. I'm not using as an excuse at all. I use to be extremely athletic. I'm at my highest weight ever right now at 188 and I'm totally miserable. I'm 45 and my Husband and I own our own Custom Paint Shop and I do Child Care and we Foster Rottie's and PItbulls & I do the interviews, references and vet checks on the potential adopters. I'm very busy all the time during the day with the kids and dogs. When the kids leave I'm so exhausted that I just want to sit and rest. Then it's time to make dinner and I'm done for. I've tried to talk to my Husband about going for hikes with me and walking but that gets me no where. He is skinny and can eat anything and believe me HE DOES. He says he doesn't want me skinny. I'm a long way from skinny and it's not about that. It's about feeling good on the inside and the outside for me. It just feels like I'm just going around in circles. Has anyone else had this problem and how do you get past it? I eat pretty well but the exercising is a hit and miss. HELP!

1 - calorie deficit is all that is needed to lose weight. I love exercise and believe that people should exercise. But it's not required for weight loss. Calorie deficit = weight loss. Exercise = fitness.
2 - tell hubby you don't want to hike to get 'skinny', you want to hike for fitness, health and well being. the then lace up your shoes and go with or without him.

most of us are super busy with jobs, kids, families, obligations. if you want to exercise bad enough you'll find time. even 15, 20, 30 minutes is good for your health. if not....well then just stick to your calorie goal and you'll lose weight.

JesterMFP

Two things come to mind:

1) You don't need your husband to join you in exercise. Just go do it by yourself and he can stay home and watch the kids/dogs or take the kids and the dogs and leave him at home. A litle tough love...you say you're not using excuses but in this case you definitely are. If you want to do it, go do it.

2) You don't HAVE to exercise to lose weight. Watching your calorie intake is the most important thing. I know exercise helps becasue you can earn calories and eat more but with some careful planning and preparation, you can lose without exercise.

These were pretty much the two points that sprang to my mind too. If you can't make exercise a priority right now (and I'm not judging - you know how your life is and what your priorities are) then focus on calorie intake. Keep your calories in check, aim for nutritious foods and hopefully as you lose weight, you'll feel more energetic and more able to get the exercise in. I bet you could fit a bit in now though. Before you sit down and rest, go for a 5 minute walk. Just do something. Then, after a couple of weeks, make it a bit longer, and a bit longer. It should help your sleep, your energy levels and your mood. It all has a knock on effect.

butterflylover527

Don't focus on the numbers. Focus on having some time to relax, eating right and exercising and the weight will come off.

DaughterOfTheMostHighKing

instead of focusing on losing weight (a number) focus on being healthy. eat better, cleaner... dump the junk and the weight will follow.

gatorginger

Get an exercise DVD and schedule work outs in. Try doing them every other day. If you can't do the whole video do half of it and before long you will have the energy and passion to continue.

I do the Jillian Michaels no more trouble zones and I can only do half of it for now but I already feel better just for doing it. I am already at my maintenance level so I'm doing this video to try and tone up.

Just take baby steps but do take them

cherakee68

So after reading post..some were a little OUCH LOL but it's all good. There is a lot on my plate right now but I have to make time for me. I gave myself a goal of 50 miles walking in one month and I started a dietbet. I went shopping and got some great healthy food and did a lot of searching for some great healthy recipes. Small baby steps as one of you said but I have to start the steps! I also started a diary on how I'm feeling now and will keep track on my journey. So if anyone wants to join me on the dietbet they are more then welcome too! Also if anyone wants to friend me on here that would be great too!
http://www.dietbet.com/games/14096