I need help wrapping my head around this

mamax5

I feel I am at the point in this weight loss journey that I need to learn how to be my own cheer leader instead of a jeer leader. I just have so much bad internal dialog. How can I really get rid of it? I enjoy working out and I have overcome a lot of issues with eating and I want to be healthier. I discovered something this week that I tend to stay around 240-250 and I don't budge below 240. I don't know how to break past this mental barrier.

I watched the Biggest Loser and I see those contestants break past these issues. I know this is what is holding me back.
I have a personal trainer(2 as one is being trained) but I am not sure if they quite understand these mental hangups of mine. I don't know how long I am going to be able to coast on the motivation I get from them. They tell me I can do this all the time and I think they are wonderful, but they have never been this over weight. I think if I make it past this I would make a great trainer because I have been up to 276 pounds and I know the mental hang-ups since I live there right now. I want so bad to break past this. I had the rock bottom hit, but now I think I am living there. I thought I was going to go up, but I seem to be staying down.

wnbrice

Depends on the type of person you are. I found that for myself I reacted to outside criticism with a "**** you I am gonna show your *kitten*". So I mentally portrayed the negative thoughts as coming from a seperate entity that just occupied my head.

So when he/she(sometimes it was a she) said you cant do it fatty, my gut response was "**** you, here I go".

However it varies from person to person, someone who takes outside criticism more personally than internal is gonna have a hard time making this work.

I know that feeling as well though, I could not break 250 for over two years, kept reaching that point and then sabotaging myself. One of my big problems was that I would hit 250 at about the time that my willpower was weakest and so I would think it was okay to slack a little. Then my weight might go up because of increased workouts etc and I would fall completely off the wagon.

I think once I had the realization that it WILL come off eventually, or I am doing something wrong and need to change it. also I stopped looking at the scale as motivation and started looking at pictures side by side with someone else so they could point out the differences that I couldnt see.

Sorry this is kinda scattered I just kind of shotgunned it out.

Friend me if you would like, I would be interested in seeing how you are doing, maybe motivate each other.

BeachIron

It's highly personal but you need to find it. For me, something just clicked inside my head and I decided I wasn't going to look or feel like crap anymore. And honestly, it was the feeling more than anything else. You can always find a way to be unhappy about yourself, but rather than harping on that and beating yourself up, use it to motivate yourself to get up and get moving.

iAMsmiling

First, you must promise never, ever to watch the Biggest Loser again.
Absolutely no relationship between that crap and real life weight loss or fitness. This isn't a contest to melt away the weight in the shortest time. Fitness is a lifelong process.

Alex_is_Hawks

First, you must promise never, ever to watch the Biggest Loser again.
Absolutely no relationship between that crap and real life weight loss or fitness. This isn't a contest to melt away the weight in the shortest time. Fitness is a lifelong process.

^^^ this x 1,000,000

Angie52732

I am in the same boat. I can always get to 230 - maybe even get to 220, but only for about a week and then I am right back at the 230 area. I just can't seem to break thru this point. I took last week completely off from exercise and obsessing about my food. I ate some cake, some ice cream, went out to eat some...and you know what - I didn't gain anything and even lost a pound or so. BUT, the main thing I learned was that I can now eat those things in moderation - before a bowl of ice cream was like 3 cups for a serving - now I am happy with 1/2 - 1 cup. 1 normal slice of cake versus 1/2 the row. I chose chicken at the restaurant because I wanted to, not because I felt I had to. I changed up my exercise routine - quit going to the same gym I had been going to for the last 18 months because I finally realized that was what was holding me back. I was dieting and exercising to try and meet the numbers and goals they expected instead of realizing what was right for me. They don't know my life outside the gym, my family problems, my problems at work - my time constraints. They only saw me for the 1 hr a day 3 times a week.

Even though I have been stuck at this weight, I have been losing inches. I am down from a size 24 to a size 14/16. When I was down to 230 a few years back I was in an 18/20 pant size - so i am smaller now than I was a couple years ago AND I WEIGH THE SAME!! It has been a long process and I am finally learning to not let the scale be my judge. I am going by what I look at in the mirror every day and by how my clothes fit and by my measurements and how I feel. I now like to look at my body in the mirror to see what has changed - see the difference in my legs, arms and abs. You have to learn to love yourself no matter what. I know my old trainer is thinking since I quit him, that I will gain all the weight back. he thinks he is the only qualified trainer in our area to help people lose weight and that everyone who quits him will gain it back. Well, I have news for him! I have found some new exercise classes and am going to start working with someone who went thru an awesome transformation and he is going to help set me up on some weight training.

It is hard to do, but you have to do it to move forward. I am on facebook and I have liked all kinds of motiviational pages - those constant positive reminders help me replace the negative self talk. Find some motivational boards on Pinterest.

Hope this helps some!
Angie

Cliffslosinit

First, you must promise never, ever to watch the Biggest Loser again.
Absolutely no relationship between that crap and real life weight loss or fitness. This isn't a contest to melt away the weight in the shortest time. Fitness is a lifelong process.

^^^ this x 1,000,000

Agree^^^
check this out....

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/968182-i-lost-a-person-but-i-found-myself-leaky-s-story

iAMsmiling

First, you must promise never, ever to watch the Biggest Loser again.
Absolutely no relationship between that crap and real life weight loss or fitness. This isn't a contest to melt away the weight in the shortest time. Fitness is a lifelong process.

^^^ this x 1,000,000

Agree^^^
check this out....

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/968182-i-lost-a-person-but-i-found-myself-leaky-s-story

Great point! Go read about Leaky. She learned the same lessons.

cmcollins001

Aside what some have already said, and this may be small, but it works for me...but adjust your ticker. Change your ticker to show how many lbs you've lost, not how many you have to go. To me, anyway, I want to see what I have accomplished, not what I have left to accomplish.

gsmithnp

I have a personal trainer(2 as one is being trained) but I am not sure if they quite understand these mental hangups of mine. ... They tell me I can do this all the time and I think they are wonderful, but they have never been this over weight...

Are you certain about this, or just assuming they've never been overweight? It might be worth asking, if you haven't already. Either way, mention your "hangups" to them. The more experienced trainer should be well-versed in dealing with these same issues in other clients. You are NOT the only one to have ever dealt with them, and he may be able to at least hook you up with someone who can help.

CCusedtodance

Aside what some have already said, and this may be small, but it works for me...but adjust your ticker. Change your ticker to show how many lbs you've lost, not how many you have to go. To me, anyway, I want to see what I have accomplished, not what I have left to accomplish.

^^^^THIS is so important. Focus on the things you have accomplished and not what you haven't. Take it a day at a time, do not worry about the future and remember it is a LIFELONG process. At least that is what is working for me.

mamax5

I have a personal trainer(2 as one is being trained) but I am not sure if they quite understand these mental hangups of mine. ... They tell me I can do this all the time and I think they are wonderful, but they have never been this over weight...

Are you certain about this, or just assuming they've never been overweight? It might be worth asking, if you haven't already. Either way, mention your "hangups" to them. The more experienced trainer should be well-versed in dealing with these same issues in other clients. You are NOT the only one to have ever dealt with them, and he may be able to at least hook you up with someone who can help.

Well, one hasn't...he's been in the military. One of the managers has been MAYBE 30lbs overweight. I'm talking downright obese...like myself. They don't act like former fat people. I've tried talking about my hangups and they don't seem to quite understand where I am coming from. The one manager understands more than my trainers do. I always thought hiring a trainer was going to be "IT". While they are good, they still seem a tad lacking. And while I'm being pushed, I don't feel pushed hard enough. But those plank push ups were killer!

Francl27

I don't understand. What is the mental problem you get a 240? You start binging again, or the scale just stops moving?

The problem I see is that you're not eating anywhere enough. You need to eat closer to your goal. By doing that, you'll be able to eat more of the things you lose, and it will be much easier to stick to the plan.

bethlaf

First, you must promise never, ever to watch the Biggest Loser again.
Absolutely no relationship between that crap and real life weight loss or fitness. This isn't a contest to melt away the weight in the shortest time. Fitness is a lifelong process.

^^^ this x 1,000,000

Agree^^^
Biggest loser has as much relationship with weight loss as Extreme couponing has with real grocery shopping

ETA: if you get a special spa hotel , tv cameras watching your every move and personal trainers medical staff and nutritionists OF course you can succeed