Bad Idea

MagicalLeopleurodon · April 2013

I have Zombies, Run! on my phone. love it. havent played in months due to weather.

So i strap on my snazzy armband and my snazzy hrm. I put in my biohazard earbuds.

Its gorgeous today, and my fat dogs looked bored. "Theyre fat dogs. Not like we'll get past a jog."
So on go the leashes. Green for shepherd husky Parker. Pink for shepherd husky Harley Quinn. Black for pitbull curr Rogue.

I hit START MISSION and open the door. Green leaves, blue sky. Aahhhhhh.

We walk and they potty. The voice overs speak. The dogs wag their tails. Life is good.

Then the first ZOMBIES:100 METERS kicks on. Groans. HORROR.
So i start to jog. Rogue decides she wants to keep walking and cranks my left arm behind my back-refusing to go faster. Parker trots like a buggy horse directly beside me before planting his feet DEAD to pee. Harley loses her bleeding mind and rockets forwatd, backward, and side to side-chomping every flipping stick and blade of grass possible at a sprint.

We finally regulate, with Rogue begrudglingly trotting 100000 feet behind us, Parker so close he cant think of peeing, and Harley phasing between lunging forward and walking. ZOMBIES EVADED.

My heart rate is maxed and im sucking wind (upper body workout?).

We resume walking. Minutes later WARNING ZOMBIES 100 METERS.

by the fifth zombie attack, i have been deadlegged, tripped, yanked, dragged, dislocated, and peed on.

The zombies won.

And my dogs are on their own during the apocalypse.

Calliope610 · April 2013

Thanks for the LOL.

KAYRRIE · April 2013

What's the actual name of that game?

Twilightsunflower · April 2013

laughing so hard im almost crying

jamaicanlady · April 2013

LOVE this. You're a great writer.

MagicalLeopleurodon · April 2013

What's the actual name of that game?

Zombies, Run!

the icon on mine is a black and red box wiith hands reaching up to a running guy.

tpittsley77 · April 2013

Haha thanks for the laugh! Sorry the zombies won tho!

Melo1966 · April 2013

Wow I can't imagine trying it with 3 dogs the invisible zombies are going to eat you and them everytime. Now if only the dogs could see the zombies you make have a chance for survival.

macjenkins · April 2013

Got to try this app. It's sounds hilarious!

rduhlir · April 2013

HAHAHA....

This is great...also a reason why if I take the pups for a run it is only at Shelby Farms Dog Park...then I don't have to worry about the deadlegged, tripped, peed on, yanked, and face planted me...oh wait..I have a Blue Heeler that always decides I am not running fast enough so jumps and pushes my butt to go faster.....

But in the end, she is one of my biggest fans so it just makes me smile.

thecanface · April 2013

ugh! freakin dogs!! LOL that was funny though...

hkmurphy83 · April 2013

OMG!! I was laughing so hard, tears started rolling! Thank you for the great laugh. You are an entertaining writer!

GetSoda · April 2013

Establish yourself as the pack leader, and it will solve the problem

MagicalLeopleurodon · April 2013

HAHAHA....

This is great...also a reason why if I take the pups for a run it is only at Shelby Farms Dog Park...then I don't have to worry about the deadlegged, tripped, peed on, yanked, and face planted me...oh wait..I have a Blue Heeler that always decides I am not running fast enough so jumps and pushes my butt to go faster.....

But in the end, she is one of my biggest fans so it just makes me smile.

i adore my dogs-but towards the end i was wondering if its abusive to tie them all together so they will all drag the same direction! my neighbors think im insane, i was yelling at my dogs, "I SWEAR I WILL ROAST YOUR LEGS IN A REAL ZOMBIE APOCSLYPSE!"