Small Victories

scookiemonster

I have been on mfp for about a month, but I've been yo-yoing for years. I finally decided that I was going the slow-and-steady route. No goal date. No crazy restrictions. Eat if I'm hungry, keep it within moderation. I need this to be sustainable, not just pounds that drop off and then come back with interest.

I decided to refocus my efforts about a month ago for a simple reason. I have a wedding to go to today. A month ago, I went into my closet to try on the dress I wanted to wear. I put it on and was mortified to find that it wasn't even close to fitting - the zipper was a solid two or three inches apart at the top. There was no way. I was angry and frustrated and disappointed. As I saw it, I had three options: crash diet and squeeze into the dress, accept the inevitability of my own fat and just buy a bigger dress, or focus, not on this wedding, but on the rest of my life, take a slow and steady approach, buy a bigger dress for now, and hopefully fit into that dress some day in the future.

I went for option C. I signed up for mfp and started logging my food. I put in an effort to get more consistent exercise. I went out dress shopping - after several failed efforts I finally found a dress that I loved, that made me feel happy and sexy, and didn't break the bank.

In the last month, I have hit road blocks. I was sick. I did something unidentified to my back that basically prevented me from doing any real exercise for most of the month. I've been stressed, dealing with family, and trying to adjust my eating habits to accommodate several new food sensitivities that I seem to have developed.

I have also lost six pounds. Six pounds. The strange thing, though, is that my waist and hip measurements weren't moving. I couldn't figure out where the pounds were coming from. I was afraid that it was muscle loss from not being able to work out the way I was before I hurt my back. I was happy about the pounds, but concerned that they weren't the right kind of pounds (the fat kind).

Then, last night, just for kicks, I tried on that dress. I didn't think I had a chance. After all, my measurements haven't really been changing. To my shock and amazement, it ZIPPED. Now I have TWO awesome dresses to choose from. And then, the best part: I was admiring myself in the mirror, and I realized something. In that strapless dress, when I pulled my hair up, my back looked flawless above the dress. No lumps. A nice little concave area along my spine. Muscles visible. Nothing bulging out over the top of the dress.

Looks like I figured out where the weight was coming from - I just didn't notice because I don't measure that part of my body.

I'm writing this post because I want to make sure I remember this. I am so easily discouraged and frustrated. I was convinced that my weight loss wasn't really getting me anywhere. Before I started, I was convinced I'd never be able to lose weight without starving myself. I've still got at least another 20-30lbs to go, but I'm proud that I was able to push past my own doubts and get out from under my own pessimism and get a good start.

Also, it just shows that even when you think you're not getting anywhere, maybe you are. I thought I wasn't really losing. I thought those six pounds were just water weight or lost muscle. I couldn't really see my pants fitting better. I am apparently very predisposed towards doubting myself.

I just wasn't looking in the right places.

lilpoindexter

Congratulations. Slow and steady wins the race over the long haul. Don't give up when you have the occaisional bad day/week/ month...it happens to everybody....but as long as you stick with it, you will achieve the goals you are looking for.