Dressing like her Old Self

damiannikodem

No, just colleagues who pass the pleasantries of the day

Chances are she may not "see" herself yet and hasn't even thought about updating her wardrobe. Tell her she looks great and dedication really shows. If you look at clothing online, perhaps show her something that you thnk would look great on her. Plant the seed.

This isn't always the case, ive lost a crapton of weight and I still wear all of my fat guy clothes to work simply because years ago I got rid of all of my smaller sizes and I seriously cannot be bothered to go out and buy more.

missbp

Hiya,

I wanted some feedback if I may.

I have been in my current job for nearly 12 months. There is a lady in my office who has been on a weight loss program before I started and had lost loads of weight. In the time I have been here she has evidently lost more.

I am quite a fashion conscious woman and believe everyone should endeavour to look their best.

My colleague dresses like her older larger self. She has a waist, hips, a pert bottom and strong thighs but she shrouds herself in over size tops, jeans that are too loose and open bottom skimming shirts.

Every time I want to shout how damn good she looks and it’s time to change her mind set and shop for a new wardrobe.

I fear I’d be greatly overstepping the mark?

Perhaps she is waiting to reach her goal size/weight, before investing in new clothing. While it may not be how you would do things, or me for that matter, I think you shouldn't say anything to her. Just compliment her on her outstanding commitment and let it go at that.

MB

jolt28

I replaced my clothes several times during my journey and it was expensive. she is probably waiting because of that fact. I don't blame her. And you said she has lost more which means she probably will keep going...so yeah, i think you would overstep. She will replace when it is time.

I agree - maybe she can't afford it and you would only embarrass her; no way should someone butt in!

NKF92879

Perhaps it's a financial issue. As I was losing weight, I found myself sometimes wearing things that were too big because I couldn't always afford to buy new.

Lyerin

I would just tell my coworker, "hey, I just wanted to tell you that you really look great." She will get around to getting rid of the fat clothes in her own time.

SoDamnHungry

You could tell her she has such a cute figure that she would look great in "X". It's not being too pushy but would let her know you think she looks great and could get away with wearing stylish things. It also hopefully wouldn't make her feel like she looks bad in what she currently has, in case she can't afford new clothes, or is perhaps waiting to finish losing before buying new things.

nygrl4evr

Perhaps it's a financial issue. As I was losing weight, I found myself sometimes wearing things that were too big because I couldn't always afford to buy new.

This would be me. Even though I have lost a lot of weight I still continue to wear some of my bigger clothes because I just cannot afford any new clothes. I have a daughter in college, 4 pets, and an ex who pays child support when he feels like it. If anyone tried to tell me I needed to go shopping for new stuff I think I would be more embarrassed then anything else having to admit that I just didn't have the funds to. Just give her the compliments of how great she looks and leave the rest alone unless you are positive it isn't a financial issue holding her back from buying new clothes.

skinnyinnotime

depends how you do it....someone said to me 'you know what you've got such a great figure now you should show it off'. That was really nice. My trainer was a bit more brutal she said 'you've got to get rid of the fat person's clothes or you'll just be tempted to fill it out again' (And then she said 'I forbid you to wear that jumper out of the house!') That wasn't quite so nice. But I took the hint and went shopping

Bahahahaa quite a contrast in advice given!

Alta2000

I replaced my clothes several times during my journey and it was expensive. she is probably waiting because of that fact. I don't blame her. And you said she has lost more which means she probably will keep going...so yeah, i think you would overstep. She will replace when it is time.

^^^^^ this, I still wear my "fat" clothes as my journey is not finished and I dread buying a full new wardrobe only to get comfortable in my now size and not pushing for my ideal size ... she may just be waiting

This! I have been "shopping" in my closet and wearing my old clothes that I had not thrown. I do not plan to buy anything now until I reach maintenance weight.

Koldnomore

I am quite a fashion conscious woman and believe everyone should endeavour to look their best.

Have you considered that she is not interested in the 'latest fashions' maybe she is comfortable in her clothes? Maybe she feels that she IS looking good with all the weight she has lost? Perhaps she does not feel the need to show off for the people at work and chooses to dress more conservatively? Maybe she has had a hard financial bump and just can't afford to buy clothes?

I would refrain from commenting on her figure or anything else about her wardrobe until / unless you get to know her first. If you don't want to take the time to become a friend then really you shouldn't just offer advice. I lost close to 40 lbs before I even thought about buying new clothes because I just didn't want to be bothered. I don't have anyone at work to impress and as long as my clothing is clean and fits well enough that it wasn't falling off of me it's not high on my priority list. Random people commenting on my life/appearance just annoy me.

katedevall

It's her choice what she wants to wear. Maybe that's what she is comfortable in. Or perhaps she doesn't want to buy new clothes until she is done losing weight.

Maris_Swan

I would approach her privately or just invite her to go shopping with you. I used to be a 28w and now I'm a 12 and I can say that sometimes it is still very hard to dress for my current size. She is probably feeling a lot of body image issues adjusting to the weight loss.

kmm7309

I believe that unless non-public parts of a person are showing, it is never anyone else's business how they choose to dress. It is the same as offering unsolicited critique about food choices.

I have to say I agree with this. My first reaction was to tell you, "yes! Tell her! She deserves to know!" but I don't think it's your place. I still have (and sometimes wear) my 2x's and 3x's, even though I'm a size 14. I usually do it when I know I will have a stressful day. It's a security blanket. Although I have (and wear) larges now, sometimes I feel better in a bigger size because I dressed so frumpy my whole life. It took me several months (and an unsuccessful shopping excursion in the plus size section because I was too small for everything) to realize that my security blanket should be form-fitting clothes.

tinak33

I am quite a fashion conscious woman and believe everyone should endeavour to look their best.

Have you considered that she is not interested in the 'latest fashions' maybe she is comfortable in her clothes? Maybe she feels that she IS looking good with all the weight she has lost? Perhaps she does not feel the need to show off for the people at work and chooses to dress more conservatively? Maybe she has had a hard financial bump and just can't afford to buy clothes?

I would refrain from commenting on her figure or anything else about her wardrobe until / unless you get to know her first. If you don't want to take the time to become a friend then really you shouldn't just offer advice. I lost close to 40 lbs before I even thought about buying new clothes because I just didn't want to be bothered. I don't have anyone at work to impress and as long as my clothing is clean and fits well enough that it wasn't falling off of me it's not high on my priority list. Random people commenting on my life/appearance just annoy me.

^^^This.
I have lost almost 50 lbs. Still haven't bought new clothes. I have other things I need to spend my money on and I don't care about fashion. I don't care that my clothes are baggy now. They are comfortable and aren't falling off me yet, so I will still wear them.
When they no longer fit and DO fall off me, then I will get new clothes.

Hellbent_Heidi

She probably doesn't see herself as small as she is now. Do you think she'd be offended if you said "Wow, you look so good, you're probably going to need a whole new wardrobe now"??

I'd say tread carefully as not to offend, but be sure to compliment her and tell her how amazing you think she looks! In the workplace, people are often uncomfortable commenting on someone's body, but woman to woman, its a lot easier. She's very likely noticed your fasion consciousness, so coming from someone like you, she might find it even more flattering!

Goin4goal

I would just pay her a huge compliment on how great she is looking and leave it at that. IF she wants fashion advise, maybe she'll say something to you. Otherwise I would leave it alone. I'm sure she knows what she's doing.

ruwise

You could give a subtle hint like maybe if you are good at fashion advice tell her that with all the weight she has lost she now has the perfect body for x style. If she is thinner than you or has a slightly different body shape you could even say I wish I had your waist, legs etc so that I could wear this type of dress etc.

You'll probably be able to tell from saying this whether she is interested or not.

There could be lots of factor as to why she hasn't, money may be one but having no clue may be another. I've been overweight most of my life. I've always considered clothes shopping a horrid chore designed to depress and humiliate me. She could be the same and have hang up's about it or she may just not really care about fashion.

carmieg3

Perhaps it's a financial issue. As I was losing weight, I found myself sometimes wearing things that were too big because I couldn't always afford to buy new.

I am in this boat, all my work clothes are basically falling off me, luckily I kept some skinny clothes from my post-college years, but overall my work wardrobe is too big!! Right now I cant afford to buy new clothes, and I still have some weight to loose, so I am not buying a new wardrobe till I hit my goal weight

Way to expensive!!

themanda04

maybe you could organize a clothing swap at your work? depending on how many employees your company has and how many are women, sometimes it's a really cool way to clean out your closet and get some new-to-you things at the same time. could turn into a win/win for everyone!

PippaJo_

maybe you could organize a clothing swap at your work? depending on how many employees your company has and how many are women, sometimes it's a really cool way to clean out your closet and get some new-to-you things at the same time. could turn into a win/win for everyone!

This is a great idea, and I was going to suggest something along those lines. Like - you say you're in the same weight-loss program? Are you (or were you) anywhere close to her current size? Perhaps you can offer her some item from your closet, saying 'hey, I tried this on and it didn't really fit me, but I think it would look fabulous on you, would you like it?'

I can totally understand if she's waiting for financial reasons, or losing more weight. I'm in-between sizes right now, but there's no way I'm going to buy anything that won't fit at my goal weight, so belts it is! I'll just deal with looking frumpy until then, but I know that I'd feel hurt or depressed if someone pointed that out to me. (Especially if I really wanted new items, but simply couldn't afford them.)

However - a well-timed "Girl, you are lookin' *fantastic*, you've got some *shape*!" - and then letting. it. go. would probably be welcomed. Everyone likes a good, honest compliment. Whatever she does with that compliment after that is her business.