TRUTH TIME

clairelindy

so its time I told the truth for years I suffered with a eating disorder.
I would hide chocolate sweets and eat them all in one sitting I would then starve myself the next day and take laxatives to get it out my body I did this for a number of years. I got down to a size 8-10 to skinny for a 5ft 7 girl I think I looked bad.

I met my other half and started to eat healthy because he loved me for me I am a hourglass girl and he loved my curves.
I am now a size 12-14.

I am getting married and my target is the lose 7lbs I have been trying eating better but I cant seem to get pass 150lbs

I am so afraid that I have started to go back to my old ways I ate a load of chocolate and crisps the weekend and toke laxatives to get it all out. Silly I know so I thought I would shame myself and get it out there so I hopefully will not go back to that.

I want to do this healthy and the feel better about myself its so hard I cant seem to lose anything
maybe its because I have not been sticking to it at weekends.
So its day one of being honest and trying better

sorry I had to get this out I have not told any one else about this

vorgas

Congratulations on facing your issues and taking steps to deal with them.

Eating at a slight calorie deficit, say 250 to 500 calories is certainly not unhealthy and can be sustainable until you reach your goal weight. A cheat day from time to time is certainly fine. No need to purge afterwards.

hhayes06

First off, you are brave for telling your story. I applaud you for recognizing that what you were doing was not healthful and making the necessary changes.

Second, this is not a Monday through Friday type of thing. You have to be in this every single day or it won't work. Commit yourself to being healthy every day.

Lastly, congratulations on getting married. It will be one of the best days of your life.

kitza101

Dear Clairelindy,

Well done for acknowledging the behaviours you have found yourself slipping back into - actually admitting they are happening and that you don't want them to be is a big part of moving forward! I'm glad you are talking about this, and I wish you the very best with moving forward in a healthy way, without purging.

If you find this continues, you may want to consider talking to a professional about these issues, why you find yourself falling into these behaviours, and ways to help yourself when you find yourself engaging in them. It's wonderful that you are facing them and not letting secrets fester - and very brave of you to share too, when often the urge is just to hide it all away - but disordered eating and eating disorders are complex and insidious things. You can't expect yourself to deal with these issues all by yourself hon. Binging and purging is something that a therapist can assist you, if you are interested in trying that avenue.

Take really good care of you.

Jackmichaelsmummy2011

I think you are incredibly brave to admit this! Admitting you have a problem is the 1st step, so well done!
A professional could definitly help you, they would probably use CBT which isa theropy to adjust how you think about certain things.
I think you are stronger than you think you are! When ever you finding yourself feeling the urge to bing picture your wedd4ng day tocome and hopefully that will give you the extra bit of strength you need!

You can do it! :-)

clairelindy

thank you everyone you made me all cry with your lovely messages.

I am going to do this healthy

thank you all so much you will never know how much you have helped me and made me feel

I think because of all your support I am going to tell my other half hopefully he will understand and support me like you all it
thank you

kitza101

Clairelindy,

That is really wonderful. You are a very brave person, I hope you can remember that, even though I know when you are struggling with these kinds of things you don't always feel so brave! I hope that your other half will be supportive of you and help you do what you need to do to stay healthy, physically and mentally. Sometimes just getting that big, awful secret out and finding out there are people you can trust to help you is a huge step in healing.

Take good care xx

clairelindy

ok so I have been very good the last few weeks ,but today I have failed I was mega excited as I got into a size 10 skirt sooo happy
but at work I was givin a box of chocolates as a thank you.
Well they have all gone now I just could not stop eating them
I feel so embarrassed and ashamed that I ate them. normal now I would go home and have some laxatives but I ant going to this time.

Can I call today a cheat day and get back on it tomo work extra hard at it?

greenmonstergirl

ok so I have been very good the last few weeks ,but today I have failed I was mega excited as I got into a size 10 skirt sooo happy
but at work I was givin a box of chocolates as a thank you.
Well they have all gone now I just could not stop eating them
I feel so embarrassed and ashamed that I ate them. normal now I would go home and have some laxatives but I ant going to this time.

Can I call today a cheat day and get back on it tomo work extra hard at it?

Don't beat yourself up. Start right now and get back into working out and eating right. If you end up with a gain because of the sweets, you know you messed up. If you end up with staying the same or losing then the diet gods were smiling on you.

likitisplit

ok so I have been very good the last few weeks ,but today I have failed I was mega excited as I got into a size 10 skirt sooo happy
but at work I was givin a box of chocolates as a thank you.
Well they have all gone now I just could not stop eating them
I feel so embarrassed and ashamed that I ate them. normal now I would go home and have some laxatives but I ant going to this time.

Can I call today a cheat day and get back on it tomo work extra hard at it?

I wouldn't even work extra hard at it. Call today a day and keep right on. You will be fine.

The best thing to do is figure out what you will do the next time you are given a box of chocolates (my suggestion would be to put them in the break room and take one or two back to your desk. Even if you get up and eat the rest of the box, at least you'll be getting a walk in every time you eat another piece.)

Make sure that you are eating a decent amount throughout the day, so your body doesn't drive you to binge so that it can get the calories it needs.

Paco4gsc

To the OP, it's not silly to feel guilty or embarrassed after making a mistake like indulging in too many sweets nor is it silly to have the urge to "make it right" by getting rid of it or resolving to make it up the later. Those are normal reactive feelings that most people get. What's important is what you do with those feelings. Purging (from one end or the other) or doing a buttload more exercise or restriction the next day can often make you feel even worse after. The difficult but overall better thing to do is accept that you made a mistake and resolve to do better as you move forward. I wish you the best of luck.

ndegwa

Any form of habit will always linger, smoking, recreational drugs, food disorders are the same. It takes will power to stay away. Even if you have had a small relapse the main thing is you are back on your feet and doing what you need to. The best thing you could of done was sharing it with someone or all of us.

everyone has their secrets you are braver than most sharing it with the world. The thing is now is that blip is in the past and thats where you need to leave it and concentrate on getting you where you want to be!