Child with ADHD

MommaKit79

SO...we haven't had her tested, mainly because we don't want to think about medication and OTHER issues...But, we think my step-daughter is ADHD. We know there are ways to help control mild cases with diet and exercise and we want to, at least when she is with us, start monitoring things she eats and such.

We are already going to cut her sugar back drastically...especially on an empty stomach. What else do you suggest, if you deal with this?

AwesomelyAmber

Might not seem like the best answer... but PATIENCE. Especially since she is only with you part of the time. Cutting back on sugar and crap food is always a great idea. Structured activities are great too. :flowerforyou:

1223345

Maybe you should try getting rid of wheat.

claston77

How old is you stepdughter? And how long have you supstected she has ADHD? If she is older than preschool age and it's been longer than six months you should probably have her tested if for no other reason to rule out something else causing the symptoms. And you would have a starting point to decide how you want to go about treating and/or managing her symptoms if it is in fact ADHD, an "official" diagnosis doesn't necessarily mean medication. Good luck!

bokodasu

How old is you stepdughter? And how long have you supstected she has ADHD? If she is older than preschool age and it's been longer than six months you should probably have her tested if for no other reason to rule out something else causing the symptoms. And you would have a starting point to decide how you want to go about treating and/or managing her symptoms if it is in fact ADHD, an "official" diagnosis doesn't necessarily mean medication. Good luck!

Yep, this. It's not like if you get her tested the doctors will install an automatic Ritalin-pump in her brain; the parents are still the boss of what goes into their child. And mostly the knee-jerk prescription writing for kids who forget to use their indoor voices occasionally has stopped.

That said, cutting dyes (especially red#40) and artifical sweeteners is always a good start. It's just like anything else, pretty much - try whole food, cut out processed stuff, see what happens.

OtiWanKenobi

I have ADD and I can't tell you enough how much coconut oil and chia seeds have helped me. I eat one or the other daily. I don't know if it will calm the H part, but it definitely helps me focus. I do not take any meds.

It's basically because both have high counts of Omega 3 which are really good with people with this problem.

tibsons_girl

I agree with getting your step daughter tested. When my son was first diagnosed with ADHD, he was given behavioural therapy NOT meds. We eventually decided the therapy alone wasn't working, but it is definitely your decision as parents what you ultimately chose to do to help your stepdaughter.

Also, we were given diet recommendations of no wheat, no read meat and limited sugar (even from fruit) which seems to be helping.

fougamou

I have two kids diagnosed with ADHD, one we have never given medication, the other we just now started one medication. (My line was when ADHD impacts LEARNING -- learning, not grades was the point that I would consider medication)


Have you tried fish oil? That seemed to help both of my kids -- truth be told I could have been a placebo effect but helpful is helpful.

Caffeine has a beneficial effect on my son (the medicated one), but not my daughter. Caffeine is a stimulant like Ritalin so it makes sense that it could help.

Both my kids have seen psychologist at different times. We just got started with my son, but for my daughter, it was all focused on organizational and other coping skills. My daughter is VERY self aware and those sessions really helped her to understand what was going on (different from others). I think that awareness really benefited her in middle school.

Also with my daughter (who BTW was diagnosed in 3rd grade and is now an 8th grader) I found that books geared specifically to ADHD in girls were really useful, as ADHD in girls is often different than in boys.


We do not have any accommodation through the school at this time. We tried with my daughter, but had a combination of poor teacher follow through and my feeling that the accommodations were not appropriate for her. Her grades can be all over the place (I used to say that if you give her the same assignment on two different days she would get an A on one and an F on the other based simply on how well she was able to focus) and she forgets to turn in assignments (oddly does not forget to do them, just turn them in).

tzig00

Cut out red dye #40. I've been hearing a lot of studies that say that red #40 can, in some children, make the have the same symptoms as ADHD. It may take as long as 3 months to get completely out of their system but you will know if they're one of those children or actually have ADHD. I'm just beginning this process with my little 3 year old as he's too young to be tested but is so much "different" than other children his age.

MommaKit79

My step-daughter is 8 yrs old and I have suspected it for quite some time...it has only started recently to get extremely out of control and I think her diet has a LOT to do with that aspect of it. But, the decision to get her tested is with her mother. I am all for it but it isn't my decision. I think there is going to be some resistence in that area. but, I thought we could start controlling it, at least when she is with us...and maybe if she is so against it, she could try it too...IF she'll listen.

I have thought about the Sugar, Gluten, and just read about the Omega-3. The good thing is that ALL of these things are things I have been wanting to work on as a family so that will work out well in the whole of the issues.

OH...and also there does seem to be a slight learning disability associated with it that has already been addressed by the school.

THANKS EVERYONE!!

graceylou222

Cutting out sugar is always a good idea. My youngest brother was diagnosed wth ADHD in the 2nd grade and had to be held back. It was affecting his learning. He is very smart but he gets off task/ bored so easily. They did eventually put him on meds, and although I was iffy about them at first, they have helped him dramatically. Medication isn't always so bad. A lot of people don't realize that ADHD is mental, and if you don't understand that or even accept that it is a real thing, then I could see why meds would be an issue. But I would not outrule them just yet. It would be great idea to have her tested and just go from there. Not every person is the same, so different approaches work for different people! Good luck!

KimberlyDCZ

There is a book with a diet for adhd. I think gluten and red #40 are triggers. My son is adhd and not on medication. Patience, consistancy, routine. Those are the things that work for him. The problem is with her having to be with you only part time, the consistancy thing will be hard to do. Maybe her other parents would agree to a system to keep things routine for her so that she don't have to take medication. The medicines for it can be terrible, just suck the life right out of your child. Learn about it, learn to deal with it, and be patient and understanding.

PS. My son is homeschooled bc the schools in my area don't know how to deal with it. My mom schools him while I work since I'm a single parent.

Justkf

Having raised an adhd child who is now 20 I can honestly tell you that the diet is the hardest part to manage. Everyone involved with your child needs to be on board, a scant amount of red dye or an allergen that you take away will affect them if given by someone else. A recent revelation is that adhd is linked to sleep deprivation for many. My son has been a chronic insomniac most of his life and I now suspect he has had a magnesium deficiency that contributed. So before you do anything, drop the money on lab work, Great Smoky Mtn labs or Immuno labs can test for deficiencies and allergens that cause a delayed reaction. Start there-period.

angied1226

Cut out red dye #40. I've been hearing a lot of studies that say that red #40 can, in some children, make the have the same symptoms as ADHD. It may take as long as 3 months to get completely out of their system but you will know if they're one of those children or actually have ADHD. I'm just beginning this process with my little 3 year old as he's too young to be tested but is so much "different" than other children his age.

This worked for my cousins son. I tried it with my son though and it did not work. Every child is different, I decided to medicate my son once I noticed his ADHD was affecting his learning. Ever since his grades have drastically improved and he is still the same old fun and loving kid he always was. Consistency and patience are a necessity when you are the parent of an ADHD child. ALWAYS follow through with rules and consequences and remember to praise when they are being good. They thrive on success.

chineyLuv

I feel your concern. I struggled with the same thing when my son was really young. I was afraid to get him diagnosed b/c it was 'different' to me. I have a 13 year old with ADHD. And his pediatrician told me that something else that REALLY helps them is getting them involved in sports, specifically Karate/Martial arts!
I've heard MANY people say that.

briggsy13

My daughter has never been diagnosed, BUT we saw signs in her behavior and we cut our gluten from her diet. That alone made a HUGE difference in her behavior. Recently now that her behavior has changed because of no gluten I can notice when she is exposed to other things that affect her. She had to go on an antibiotic for a UTI and the meds were dyed and flavored because the taste is horrible apparently. She was off the walls for those 10 days and is still not back to normal. I googled red dye last night, it can stay in their brain for up to 6 weeks!!! I'm hoping it doesn't take that long to get out of her system. I'm very pleased with the progress we have made with her diet elimination.

rassha01

Patience, positive reinforcement, and parental follow through seem to be working with my son. He was diagnosed in 1st grade, currently finishing up 5th. We put him on small doses of ritalin in 2nd and 3rd grade and have since stopped giving it to him. Straight A student all through school, he understands his disorder and knows he has to work hard to get through it. I think working with him through out the school years, rewarding his great acheivements, and holding him accountable for his downfalls has done a lot to grow his confidence and increase his success in school.

southpaw211

In addition to dyes and excess sugar, we limit processed foods with preservatives in my daughter's diet. She was diagnosed at age 6 after three years of trouble sitting at circle time in nursery school/kindergarten/first grade and having some major anxiety issues with seat work in school. I could deal with her being a chatty patty and high energy, but along with that (and people who don't have a child diagnosed with ADHD rarely understand this) you also have the negative impact of ADHD. Your child knows that something isn't right. My daughter would try to do her homework at night and would erase holes in the paper because she couldn't get her letters to look exactly the way they were pre-printed on the paper. She would cry at the dinner table because it felt awkward to her to sit in the chair and she could only be comfortable if she stood. We would have meltdowns in the mornings because of tags in her shirts, the waistband on her jeans and the seams in her socks. She couldn't dry her hands in a public restroom because the noise of the dryer sounds 1000x louder to her than anyone else. All of these are sensory issues that go along with her anxiety and impulsivity. After trying fish oil and changing her diet for 6-8 months, none of these things were going away and my little girl no longer had a sparkle in her eye or a smile on her face. That's when we decided to go with medication. I've never regretted it. She's flourishing in 3rd grade, 80% of the sensory issues have gone away and her report card is solid. Meds were the best thing in our case. She's my chipper little girl again.

Now I didn't mean to turn this into a "my story", but one thing I wanted to mention - before we could get to the point where she is able to handle this, there was an 18 month wait to see a specialist to have her evaluated and diagnosed. The school can't do much for you without a diagnosis (like a 504 or IEP), and obviously if meds were the best choice you'd need the diagnosis for that too. So I would be aware that if her mom does seem receptive to having her evaluated, don't wait to make an appointment. Things get tougher from this point on (my daughter is also 8), so the sooner she can get some relief, the better for her. Good luck!

darkguardian419

She's still a little kid. Little kids are hyper.

Let her go play and run off the energy, don't medicate her into submission.

Kandace_Riopel

ANYTHING with red dyes in it. also APPLES .... they are very high in natural sugars and my brother (ADHD diagnosed) used to eat them like crazy and the doctor pointed out the apples. my 2 boys i am also sure have adhd but like you i have chosen to treat with discipline, stimulation and diet rather than medication because I am able too. My step daughter (16 yo) is on concerta for ADHD by HER choice as she finds it easier to focus on her studies in school ....

BamaBreezeNSaltAire

The post about the red dye is a nail on the head. Also look at preservatives, they make children go nuts. I have friends with children that have Aspergers (ADHD goes hand in hand with it) and both the dye and preservatives make them go off the deep end. When these kids come to my home as they so often do, I've learned from their parents to make sure they get fresh fruits and veggies and NOTHING with those things in it. Make life so much easier for all of us!

BAMFMeredith

Be mindful of preservatives and color additives in food. Also, gluten can (not always, but can) be a trigger. My son is 6 and although his doctor says he's still a little young for official testing, he has all the symptoms. I notice that he's much more focused and manageable when we cut out the gluten/sugar/preservatives, etc. Of course this is REALLY hard with a super picky 6 year old, and I'd be a total liar if I said we never got happy meals or things like that, but we do the best we can and it does seem to help.

Another big thing is sleep. Many children don't get enough sleep, and it tends to contribute to those ADHD symptoms. Making sure your little one gets a good 10 hours of sleep/night (less for adults, but kids need lots of it) will help, too. I am VERY against medicating children unless absolutely necessary, so we are exploring all holistic approaches and alternative therapies before making that move. I have ADHD as well, and holistic methods worked for me until early adulthood; I've only in the last few years had to begin taking medication, and even now I only take a very small dosage.

But as others have said, your biggest ally will be PATIENCE. It's frustrating. Sometimes you just want to tear your hair out. Just be patient, help your child to understand what is going on with them, and just make sure he/she knows that they are smart, loved, and important. I would also recommend keeping your child very active and involved in a sport of some kind. It's really helped with my son, having him in baseball. Good luck!

Lleldiranne

My mom has ADD. My brother has ADHD. My son has ADHD. I have ADHD. And it gets to be a bit of a touchy topic for me. So feel free to ignore my ranting.

Diet hasn't made a lot of difference. Of course, we generally have healthy foods around - lots of fruits and vegetables to snack on, etc. But sugar doesn't make a child more hyperactive. Some of the artificial dyes have been implicated, but I'm not sure I've seen much of a difference (my son has issues on days when he's had something with red dye, but he's had issues on days when there hasn't been any in our diet for weeks).

Above all, realize that this isn't something that you "cure." It isn't even really something that you want to cure. It's a different way for the brain to function. People with ADD/ADHD are highly intelligent and very creative. Einstein most likely had ADD. Same with Thomas Edison. Also, many screenwriters, directors, authors, etc …

Help her learn to control her impulses. Help her learn to manage her activity and to recognize when she's having an "oh shiny" moment, and how to pull herself back. Help her learn to channel her hyperfocus (yes, we get super super focused on things and have a hard time changing tracks) into things that are positive. Help her to do her best in school, but accept that it won't be the same performance as a child without ADD -- and be ready to be her advocate with the schools (An IEP is the best thing we did for our son's education). Some children and adults do need medication in order to learn to manage herself. Meds aren't evil, but they also aren't a "fix," just a help.

And above all, let her know you love and value her just as she is!!

Jinkeys

In addition to dyes and excess sugar, we limit processed foods with preservatives in my daughter's diet. She was diagnosed at age 6 after three years of trouble sitting at circle time in nursery school/kindergarten/first grade and having some major anxiety issues with seat work in school. I could deal with her being a chatty patty and high energy, but along with that (and people who don't have a child diagnosed with ADHD rarely understand this) you also have the negative impact of ADHD. Your child knows that something isn't right. My daughter would try to do her homework at night and would erase holes in the paper because she couldn't get her letters to look exactly the way they were pre-printed on the paper. She would cry at the dinner table because it felt awkward to her to sit in the chair and she could only be comfortable if she stood. We would have meltdowns in the mornings because of tags in her shirts, the waistband on her jeans and the seams in her socks. She couldn't dry her hands in a public restroom because the noise of the dryer sounds 1000x louder to her than anyone else. All of these are sensory issues that go along with her anxiety and impulsivity. After trying fish oil and changing her diet for 6-8 months, none of these things were going away and my little girl no longer had a sparkle in her eye or a smile on her face. That's when we decided to go with medication. I've never regretted it. She's flourishing in 3rd grade, 80% of the sensory issues have gone away and her report card is solid. Meds were the best thing in our case. She's my chipper little girl again.

Now I didn't mean to turn this into a "my story", but one thing I wanted to mention - before we could get to the point where she is able to handle this, there was an 18 month wait to see a specialist to have her evaluated and diagnosed. The school can't do much for you without a diagnosis (like a 504 or IEP), and obviously if meds were the best choice you'd need the diagnosis for that too. So I would be aware that if her mom does seem receptive to having her evaluated, don't wait to make an appointment. Things get tougher from this point on (my daughter is also 8), so the sooner she can get some relief, the better for her. Good luck!

This is almost exactly like my experience with my 10 year old, get her tested, the more you know the better you can do for your own child. They are not going to push medication on you, it will always be your decision to make. My daughter ended up being diagnosed with ADHD, general anxiety disorder, sensory issues and mild OCD. This diagnosis gave us the the starting point from which to develop our game plan. Treating the anxiety allieviated the symptoms of all of the other issues to the point that they were managable for her. It took 3 years to find the perfect combonation of treatments for us. When you know better, you do better.

southpaw211

Above all, realize that this isn't something that you "cure." It isn't even really something that you want to cure. It's a different way for the brain to function. People with ADD/ADHD are highly intelligent and very creative. Einstein most likely had ADD. Same with Thomas Edison. Also, many screenwriters, directors, authors, etc …

Help her learn to control her impulses. Help her learn to manage her activity and to recognize when she's having an "oh shiny" moment, and how to pull herself back. Help her learn to channel her hyperfocus (yes, we get super super focused on things and have a hard time changing tracks) into things that are positive. Help her to do her best in school, but accept that it won't be the same performance as a child without ADD -- and be ready to be her advocate with the schools (An IEP is the best thing we did for our son's education). Some children and adults do need medication in order to learn to manage herself. Meds aren't evil, but they also aren't a "fix," just a help.

And above all, let her know you love and value her just as she is!!

I agree with all of this 100%! My daughter's creativity is off the charts, and her though brain moves at warp speed, now that she can focus a little easier, mostly good things come of that. And the hyperfocus! I do have to limit the minecraft or she would sit in front of it for an entire day, I'm sure. I think being able to zone out on something like this for a little while each day is really good for her. It's kind of her down time.

ashleyngill

A lot of the responses comment on what you CAN'T have (or shouldn't) with ADHD. We typically eat a healthy, low-to-no-processed foods (although we've been a little off lately), so a lot of these things don't really make a difference to us. However, one thing I noticed is that our daughter does SIGNIFICANTLY better if she has a mostly protien-rich breakfast before school. She loved having smoothies, fruit, or even plain yogurt with fresh fruit for breakfast. But....when we switched her to more egg-based breakfasts, we noticed her focus increased. She could actually have a conversation about what she did at school, what her homework was about, and she went from taking 2 hours to finish her homework (in 1st grade) to a half hour or less.

Her favorite breakfast is her egg muffins. We make them in a mini muffin pan. Here's what we do:

6 whole eggs (we use brown, cage-free, omega-3 eggs)
6 egg whites
diced bell pepper
diced mushrooms
sausage or chorizo
cheese of her choosing
seasonings of her choosing

Whisk the eggs, add the ingredients, and put in the mini muffin pan and bake

She loves getting to help make them, and that she can microwave as many as she wants by herself for breakfast each morning.

dlg1467

Every kid is with ADHD is different. So take all of the information people are sharing and pick out the things that will work for you.
This is my experience with my kid and what's helped, and what doesn't.

Diet: Yes. Added colours and preservatives affect him. When he was about 5 and at soccer, he had (without me knowing) 3 Blue Kool-Aid Jammers. He was so out of control and freaked out and he almost threw up. Every other kid was pounding back Jammers, but had no problem. Give him Skittles, he goes crazy, give him Smarties......nothing. He is highly affected by artificial colours and flavours. Does this cure his issues? No, but he is far more manageable. Remember this artificial colours and flavours are in everything. Toothpaste/Fruit Drinks/Cereal/Vitamins, you name it.

Excercise: Yes. The more active we keep him better behaved he is. Does this cure his issues? No. but he is more manageable.

Nature: Yes, that's what I said, nature. He is never happier just running around out in nature/ woods/parks/trees/camp/cottage. Does it cure him. No. But he is more manageable. (are you sensing a trend here?)

Vitamins: Yes. Whenever his vitamin D is low (Oct/Nov/Dec) his behaviour becomes less manageable. We also supplement with Omega3 and a mulitvitamin (make sure they don't have added colours/flavours/aspartame)

Behaviour Modification: We have done every behaviour program you can think of. Every reward/punishment/time out program there is. Only 2 have ever had any use. #1. 1-2-3 Magic. Works great for younger kids. Shows them boundaries and an easy way to manage behaviour simply. #2. Connected Parenting by Jennifer Colari. Works for older kids.

You can't cure ADHD. Don't try. its what makes them the imaginative/funny/exciting kids that they are. What you want to do is make them be able to understand their behaviour so that they can learn, and be productive and functional. People with ADHD who don't understand and can't learn and function are the ones who have trouble. You might need medication. Every child is different. You need to see what your kid needs.

Good Luck.

kcpond

We have a child with ADHD, and we also tried behaviour management and diet. It helped a little for a while, but in the end it was not helping so we decided that we had to go the medication route. It has made a world of difference in him and we have not seen very much difference it his personality. He is not spaced out. He is however, better able to focus in on what he is supposed to be doing. As mathjulz says, it is not a fix but it does help him focus. Everyone is different, and solutions are different as well. As others have said you should see his doctor and get him/her diagnosed.

Jchambers1130

Guess no one has read that sugar does not make a child or adult hyper. It is the event they are at that causes them to be excited. i.e. birthdays, soccer games, holidays. Of course the child is going to be running around bat **** crazy then.

Read more into sugar and hyperactivity.

KimberlyDCZ

Above all, realize that this isn't something that you "cure." It isn't even really something that you want to cure. It's a different way for the brain to function. People with ADD/ADHD are highly intelligent and very creative. Einstein most likely had ADD. Same with Thomas Edison. Also, many screenwriters, directors, authors, etc …

Help her learn to control her impulses. Help her learn to manage her activity and to recognize when she's having an "oh shiny" moment, and how to pull herself back. Help her learn to channel her hyperfocus (yes, we get super super focused on things and have a hard time changing tracks) into things that are positive. Help her to do her best in school, but accept that it won't be the same performance as a child without ADD -- and be ready to be her advocate with the schools (An IEP is the best thing we did for our son's education). Some children and adults do need medication in order to learn to manage herself. Meds aren't evil, but they also aren't a "fix," just a help.

And above all, let her know you love and value her just as she is!!

I agree with all of this 100%! My daughter's creativity is off the charts, and her though brain moves at warp speed, now that she can focus a little easier, mostly good things come of that. And the hyperfocus! I do have to limit the minecraft or she would sit in front of it for an entire day, I'm sure. I think being able to zone out on something like this for a little while each day is really good for her. It's kind of her down time.

My son is obsessed with Minecraft too! I think like you said, it helps to have something to zone out on.

darkangeljanie

My 3 year old son was recently evaluated, I get the "verdict" later on this week, his speech isn't great and he has really bad tantrums but otherwise is a happy energetic boy. There's a chance he could be ADHD or Autistic or just simply a little delayed, either way I think it's a little too early for him to be labelled but Mum to Mum I'd say just go with your gut, just keep on doing what you're doing, you can't cure her but you can make things a little easier on both of you. Hows your routine? A good routine will help tremendously, maybe make a chart? I watched a video the other day and these ADHD kids shut their eyes to help them relax and concentrate and I noticed Adam Levine does that and he has ADHD, I think it helps them listen better. There's more then one way to treat people with ADHD and lots of them get therapy, the doctors aren't going to force you to shove pills down your kids neck. My son is definitely going to get speech therapy and he will be in a preschool class getting one to one help and interaction with other children with similar problems. Personally I'd reach out for a little help with this because it will benefit her in the long run.