Afraid to run outdoors solo

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Replies

  • DesireeAshley90
    DesireeAshley90 Posts: 137 Member
    I love in Brooklyn. Grew up in new York city. Lived in queens, Manhattan, and the Bronx. I've never been mugged, assaulted, or even witnessed a crime.

    I find this hilarious.

    NY NY is actually reported as one of the safest cities in the country.
  • momzeeee
    momzeeee Posts: 475 Member
    I walk five days a week and carry pepper spray, plus my phone. The pepper spray is more for dogs actually-my dad is a biker and my sister is a runner and both have been attacked by dogs. My dad carries spray and actually had to use it on a dog that did a full body lunge at his bike and knocked him over. Scary!

    I clip my pepper spray to my phone pouch and tuck both in my waistband, within easy reach. The spray came with an extender clip so it hangs down, outside my pants and the nozzle faces down, so all's I'd have to do is grab it and aim/flip off safety.
  • TwelveSticks
    TwelveSticks Posts: 288 Member
    Not sure exactly what you're scared of, but I suspect it's physical assault? In which case, I'd say you have little to worry about - if you're running, you'll have nothing to interest a mugger, and anyone with more sinister intentions won't want to tackle someone who is obviously fit and able to run away from them. However, to ease you anxiety, carry a small canister of pepper spray. As others have said, it could come in handy for critters too...
  • ApocalypticFae
    ApocalypticFae Posts: 217 Member
    I think that you're smart to be a little concerned. I have *mega* anxiety as well and also love a good murder-investigation story, which sometimes don't mix so well together, as you know. :wink: Obviously, avoid running in the mountains or heavily forested areas alone unless you stick to a small, familiar area. Other than that, I would invest in some pepper spray. If you have that, your cell phone, and your keys (I like to carry mine in "eye gouging" position :drinker: ), you should feel pretty safe and have no reason to worry! Also, trust your instincts. If the "vibe" somewhere doesn't seem right to you, avoid that place next time, even if that place happens to be a white-picket-fence-adorned cutesy neighborhood. And as others said, be aware. Don't pretend that your skipping through daisy fields if in fact you are jogging through a busy intersection. (Hah.)

    Edited to add: I recently stumbled across a running club that goes jogging as a group in the hills and also at the local college track a few times per week, so I'm actually looking forward to jumping in on one of their upcoming sessions at the college track.
  • thekyleo
    thekyleo Posts: 632 Member
    Sounds like you live in Menomonee Falls, WI. Safest city in america...also the most boring. but just go running
  • beckyboop712
    beckyboop712 Posts: 383 Member
    I used to have that anxiety because where I grew up, there was always a likelihood of running into coyotes, neighbor dogs, and if the season was right, mountain lions and bears (though I never did ran into more than neighbors dogs and coyotes...which my dogs always kept away from me). But I still went. I live in Chicago now (and in not the best neighborhood) and don't think twice about running outside just because I love it so much.

    I agree with some of the other posters...find a running group (even my little hometown has one).

    Don't let the fear of something happening stop you from going out solo! Just make sure SOMEONE knows you're heading out and that you'll let them know when you're back. Before my boyfriend and I met, I would text my sister 1000 miles away to let her know I was out and when I was back just so someone knew I was out.
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    Buy a dog.

    Or a gun.
  • jus_in_bello
    jus_in_bello Posts: 326 Member
    See a therapist, they'll have tips for the anxiety and can help you work through that. You shouldn't be so unafraid and allowing yourself to live in that mindset isn't going to do you any good. I second finding a running class. I used to see running groups all the time when I lived near a city, they were always inviting me to join, they were friendly and welcoming.

    Also, maybe take a self-defense class, burn some calories and learn how to beat the crap out of attackers. Confidence building and calorie burning, what's not to love.
  • pwittek10
    pwittek10 Posts: 723 Member
    I do not run, I walk but a couple a weeks ago a pack of pit bulls attacked and kill a 63 year old women that was just out for a walk.
    It was very close to the area I always walk. We live near open desert.
    Very scary!
  • Rhonnie
    Rhonnie Posts: 506 Member
    Just take some normal street smart precautions (go during the day, not on secluded trails, pay attention, maybe don't wear headphones if being able to hear what is going on around you is comforting (or wear them if being distracted helps your anxiety) and go running. Find a friend or neighbor that has a dog and offer to take them - most people would love for their pets to get some more exercise.
  • essicagoddess
    essicagoddess Posts: 9 Member
    Living a "what if life", isn't living at all. Get some headsets and your favorite music, and lose yourself in the music while you move your body. If your anxiety is still high, run in very public places. Avoid those areas where you will end up alone. You will be fine.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    get out there and go sometimes the only way to conquer an anxiety is face it head on. And turn off the stupid TV if it bothers you no more shows about killing and murder for you young lady!
  • Rhonnie
    Rhonnie Posts: 506 Member
    I do not run, I walk but a couple a weeks ago a pack of pit bulls attacked and kill a 63 year old women that was just out for a walk.
    It was very close to the area I always walk. We live near open desert.
    Very scary!

    Why would you post this? How is this helpful?
  • EatClean_WashUrNuts
    EatClean_WashUrNuts Posts: 1,590 Member
    Get a Tazer. They are inexpensive and capable of taking down MANY a large man.
  • mlb929
    mlb929 Posts: 1,974 Member
    The only thing to fear is fear itself! That's one of my favorites.... Fear holds so many people back from so many things, it's nothing to be afraid of. Thing of the joys, the rewards and the accomplishments which far are more beneficial than any fear.

    I live in a very rural community, with a major gang and drug problem. There were 6 murders in 5 months within a 10 mile radius of me, and i never feared one. I personally run with a gun, because of dogs on rural areas, or cougars, coyotes, bobcats, wolves, rattlesnakes, etc. I've had near misses with cars, but more people are cautious and safe than the ones that aren't. I've been offered water out in the middle of no where, bananas from farm workers lunches, rides when it got hot and I was walking. I plan routes by peoples houses I know and always let someone know where I"m going, when to expect me back and I text mid-route on runs longer than 10 miles. I've ran a couple thousand miles over the past three years I've been running, and never run in fear.
  • affacat
    affacat Posts: 216 Member
    Get some therapy, and take medication!

    or... just get over it and go for a run.
  • dakotawitch
    dakotawitch Posts: 190 Member
    Not to be all doom and gloom, but honestly your bigger concern as a runner is injury, getting hit by a car, or attacked by a dog, not random violence. Don't wear headphones, keep an ID on you (try RoadID.com), follow traffic laws, be visible (with your clothing and your actions), and just be aware of your surroundings.

    Agreed. In the US, at least, you're far more likely to be assaulted by someone you know in a situation you felt was safe, than to be grabbed by a stranger on a running path. Of the reported sexual assaults on female victims in the US, more than 2/3 are committed by someone you know. And you still spend time alone with male friends right? (Not that all assaults are committed by men, right?) This is not say you shouldn't carry your pepper spray or be aware of your surroundings, but statistically you are far more likely to be harmed in your own home by someone you know (stats show that the vast majority of sexual assaults happen in the victim's home or the home of someone they know, at the hands of someone they know) than you are out in public.

    I know that's not exactly comforting information -- as someone who researches and teaches this stuff for a living, it freaks me the *kitten* out -- but it does put our fear of being in public spaces into perspective.

    (If you want to see the stats I'm talking about, go to http://http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pdf/sv-datasheet-a.pdf)
  • DesireeLovesOrganic
    DesireeLovesOrganic Posts: 456 Member
    Just do it! You can do it. I live in the hood and have never been stabbed yet. :P I truly believe you have to keep living life and not sit on the sidelines waiting for something bad to happen...

    (Sucks to be fearful though. I think I am going to die on every flight but I always live. I know statistically I am safer in a plane than car but tell me that during takeoff! Still gotta do it though if I ever want to go anywhere! It's worth it to just do it.)
  • rem10210
    rem10210 Posts: 40 Member
    Pack heat!

    I carry pepper spray with me because of a few unruly dogs that have nipped me, so maybe try that if it makes you feel safer. I used to be afraid of running in the dark, but after getting out there and realizing I am fine it doesn't bother me at all. I do seriously second carrying a cell phone though
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
    Fear is a paralyzer and it steals our lives from us. I lived in fear of many things for much of my life. I probably should have had therapy at some point but never did. When I finally recognized that fear was making all of my decisions for me, I got mad and took authority over my life. Moving past fear is just that - moving. You have to face the fear and do whatever it is that you're afraid of. You can take it in little bits until you gain some confidence, but get out and run in a well populated area. Enjoy your life instead of hiding behind fear. If you can't do it on your own, seek help. You appear pretty young - you have your whole life ahead of you and you are missing out on it when you live in fear!
  • LeahT84
    LeahT84 Posts: 202 Member
    Sounds like you live in Menomonee Falls, WI. Safest city in america...also the most boring. but just go running

    If it wasn't for Madison and Milwaukee, I think WI would be the safest state in the country. LOL, and the most boring.

    From Appleton, and although its a big area, it is pretty safe.
  • kelseyhere
    kelseyhere Posts: 1,123 Member
    just go and take proper safety precautions:

    -wear light colored, reflective clothing
    -tell someone where you are going running before, and when they should expect you back (you can even download a gps tracker on your phone and they can follow you)
    -bring plenty of water
    -don't wear headphones (people can sneak up on you)
    -carry mace
    -stay aware of your surroundings, look people in the eye so they know you see them
    - have fun!!!
  • gibsy
    gibsy Posts: 112
    I love in Brooklyn. Grew up in new York city. Lived in queens, Manhattan, and the Bronx. I've never been mugged, assaulted, or even witnessed a crime.

    I find this hilarious.

    You're also a pretty big man, from what I can tell by your picture. Last time I checked big men weren't exactly a primary target for muggers and rapists. I definitely encourage the OP to overcome her fear, but the last thing anyone needs is some huge guy laughing at them for being afraid of something he doesn't ever have to be afraid of.

    OP: I totally understand how you feel. I used to be much more afraid to walk alone and I can tell you, facing that fear is one of the most satisfying and fulfilling achievements of my life. Just go for it! You'll be so proud of yourself when you do.
  • moni_tb_192
    moni_tb_192 Posts: 188 Member
    Plan your route, that way you'll already know which streets to take. But GO! You already said you live in a very safe city... I live in a really dangerous one, but I don't let that stop me. I just don't run around the shady places!

    Good luck and hopefully, we'll hear about you running outside pretty soon :D
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    I love in Brooklyn. Grew up in new York city. Lived in queens, Manhattan, and the Bronx. I've never been mugged, assaulted, or even witnessed a crime.

    I find this hilarious.

    You're also a pretty big man, from what I can tell by your picture. Last time I checked big men weren't exactly a primary target for muggers and rapists. I definitely encourage the OP to overcome her fear, but the last thing anyone needs is some huge guy laughing at them for being afraid of something he doesn't ever have to be afraid of.

    OP: I totally understand how you feel. I used to be much more afraid to walk alone and I can tell you, facing that fear is one of the most satisfying and fulfilling achievements of my life. Just go for it! You'll be so proud of yourself when you do.

    Who says I'm not afraid? I've actually been jumped once. In Spain of all places. And let me tell you, doesn't matter how big you are when three guys get the drop on you.

    OP, I'm laughing with you, not at you.

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