Not pregnant, just fat

jenwalton
jenwalton Posts: 87 Member
An employee at a lunch spot I go to often said to me a couple weeks ago: "How exciting! I didn't know you were expecting!". There were at least five people within earshot at the time, and because I was too embarrassed to announce that I wasn't in fact pregnant - just fat - I just nodded and smiled, effectively lying about being pregnant.

I'm really going to miss eating there.

So... this reality check has helped me realize that I have, in fact, lost control of my weight, and it's time to get back on track!

I have lost about 6 lbs so far, and have a long way to go, but I feel good about it. Just making the decision to start and make changes was the hardest part for me so far. My first short-term goal is to lose 20 lbs by the end of October (so, 14 more to go).

If anyone is looking for a MFP buddy to help keep them accountable and motivated, and want to do the same for me, please feel free to add me!

Good luck everyone!
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Replies

  • ItsSamantha
    ItsSamantha Posts: 127
    That happened to me once at DQ.My sisters friend worked there and said when are you due and i was like i'm not pregnant.The look on her face was like omg what did i just do..lol..She just said oh i thought your sister said u was pregnant again..haha i know that was a lie!But anyways congrats on the weight loss so far and you can lose the 14 lbs!I am sending you a friend request after this :D
  • helen0616
    helen0616 Posts: 97
    This happened to me once as well, at a friend's baby shower. I just brushed it off to all the blind old women having baby fever... but sadly, I know better. : ( I was drinking wine at the time and the lady was horrified. We all had a good laugh, and I pretended to be fine but so wasn't.

    My new rule: never EVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you can see a foot sticking out.
  • Four_Leaf_Clover
    Four_Leaf_Clover Posts: 332 Member
    Feel free to friend me. I have so been there! I have been asked that at least 3-4 times in my life. It just knocks the wind out of your sails!

    I have accepted that at my current weight and shape (short, 203#, very big belly) - I do in fact see why people would think that, but it is one thing I NEVER want to hear again! I gotta get rid of my belly!
  • jenwalton
    jenwalton Posts: 87 Member

    My new rule: never EVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you can see a foot sticking out.

    Getting asked this question is so offensive that even if I am sitting at someone's baby shower, I am not going to acknowledge her pregnancy UNTIL I see a foot, LOL!!
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    IF it makes you feel better, when I was roughly 130 lb at 5'6", an older woman at my place of work also thought I was pregnant... and when I said, in complete shock, "I'm not pregnant"... she INSISTED that I must be.

    So, I was very thin... but wearing one of those tent dresses that were the rage back then.

    It's good to stay motivated to lose weight... but don't let those negative feelings and stressers keep you down. There is ALWAYS some idiot who says something idiotic.
  • That has happened to me a few times, but somehow it always circumvented me and went to my mom- then I would get a phone call or text chewing me out for being prego. Wonderful how small town gossip works just because I was getting heavy. Congrats on the 6 lbs lost! I've lost 6 too and have a long way to go before my wedding in October. Just have to keep reminding myself "Find a way, not an excuse"!
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    if it makes you feel better, Im a guy and I used to joke that im on my 4th trimester.... was in shape, could see leg/arm muscles unflexed... but huge pot belly. lol.
  • Jenn09870
    Jenn09870 Posts: 66 Member
    My new rule: never EVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you can see a foot sticking out.

    OMG- Really LOL'ed!

    I accidentally did this to someone, long ago when I was much more stupid

    A cashier was showing an ultrasound picture to another employee. I glanced down, thinking the lady looked a little older- but who knows. She did have a very round belly on an otherwise somewhat slim lady.
    She corrected me that she was not expecting, it was going to be her grandchild...
    :embarassed: I don't think I said anything bad- just gestured to the picture and asked when she was due or something like that.
    I have learned my lesson and am much more careful!
  • vikki228
    vikki228 Posts: 3
    You are young, and you will lose fast...if you stay with it and I am sure you will....I look pregnant too, but, because I am pass that...no one would say that to me, they know I am alittle overweight. :(
  • Tina0807
    Tina0807 Posts: 212
    That has happened to me as well. Ugh, the feeling of "I just want to sink into the floor" always accompanies that situation. It is definitely an eye opener!!! I sent you a friend request. I too would love to keep motivated!
  • Jennloella
    Jennloella Posts: 2,286 Member

    I'm really going to miss eating there.


    this made me LOL
    we all have our breaking point, sorry yours was in public, BUT now you can use that to push through. Good luck and DON'T STOP
  • cbu23
    cbu23 Posts: 280 Member
    You can add me if you would like! I get a little scarce when it's finals week for school, but other than that I'm always on here!
  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member
    I asked once, when I was 21 and preg with my first. This lady was VERY Slender! but had a 6month pregnant belly. I figured I was safe asking a really skinny gal....
    NOPE! She was "Ummm. I'm not pregnant"

    (to be a little fair- she was a stranger at the mall and came up to ask ME about my Pregnant Belly- which WAS pregnant and dressed in cutesy maternity clothes.)

    But, never ever again will I ever ask or say anything about a belly unless they have a T-Shirt with an arrow pointing to their belly that says "BABY"
  • helen0616
    helen0616 Posts: 97
    I just realized this happened to me right AFTER I had my youngest too, she was like 3 weeks old. Somehow the tiny baby in my arms was not a clue to the fact that I was, in fact, no longer pregnant.
    People are so stupid.
  • k8ermarie
    k8ermarie Posts: 204
    An employee at a lunch spot I go to often said to me a couple weeks ago: "How exciting! I didn't know you were expecting!". There were at least five people within earshot at the time, and because I was too embarrassed to announce that I wasn't in fact pregnant - just fat - I just nodded and smiled, effectively lying about being pregnant.

    I'm really going to miss eating there.

    So... this reality check has helped me realize that I have, in fact, lost control of my weight, and it's time to get back on track!

    I have lost about 6 lbs so far, and have a long way to go, but I feel good about it. Just making the decision to start and make changes was the hardest part for me so far. My first short-term goal is to lose 20 lbs by the end of October (so, 14 more to go).

    If anyone is looking for a MFP buddy to help keep them accountable and motivated, and want to do the same for me, please feel free to add me!

    Good luck everyone!

    This is the exact thing that really got me going on my weight loss journey. Except it was the CFO (Female) of my company. I was mortified not only that she assumed but that I had to let her down and make her feel guilty. I had a doctor say it...one argued with me to take a urine test when I told him I had a tubal ligation 4 years before and that I was not pregnant! A lady at my local dollar store and even the grandmother of one of my children's friends. So I have been there and use it! Sounds like you are doing an amazing job of staying motivated! In the long run this will be most beneficial and you will be thankful for the wake up call! :) Good luck and thanks for sharing!
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    I got asked this a few times. And then, the piece de resistance... this woman on the T (Boston's subway system) insisted on me taking her seat. I shook my head because I was okay standing. Then she walks over, and in very broken English yells at me, "No! You pregnant lady! You seat! Seat now!". It was terrifying. I sat. And went for a run as soon as I got home.
  • LadyNeshoba
    LadyNeshoba Posts: 159 Member
    Ha! Happened to me when I was at my OBGYN getting my yearly check up when a pregnant woman and her mom walked in an sat down next to me.

    A little while later she asked me fiance when I was due and I looked at her and I told her "I'm not pregnant. I'm just fat." Oh man...the look on her face was priceless!

    But that was years ago. lol Surprisingly it didn't upset me at all. Which was weird. lol!
  • Alexz210
    Alexz210 Posts: 78 Member
    I'm so sorry that happened to you. I know how awful it feels! 22 pounds ago, a gentleman at my work asked me if I was pregnant. I smiled and said, "No, just fat." :)
    After he walked away, I went to the break room and cried. I also never wore that shirt again! I will never EVER ask a woman if she is pregnant. If you are not 100% sure, you should not ask!

    You can do this! I'll add you and give some encouragement. Good luck! Just let this make you stronger. And in a few months, go back to that lunch spot and show of your new and improved self!
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    This happened to me as well about a year ago. I HAD been good friends with this guy for almost eight years. He joined the army and is stationed very far away, so I only see him about once a year. I ran into his aunt at Starbucks last autumn and she literally rubbed my belly, asking me when I was due and asking "3/4 months??" I stared deep into her eyes and said "I'm not pregnant, I'm just FAT!" and literally walked away from her. I was mortified. And I guess she told my friend about that, and instead of him explaining to her you just don't do that... he defriended me on face book. Classy.
  • This has happened to me too! A little boy pointed at me and then asked his mom if I was going to have a baby :( I know he didn't mean it in a bad way, he was just a curious kid. But the honesty of it hurt quite a bit : /
  • UticaBoy51
    UticaBoy51 Posts: 344 Member
    This happens to me all the time, it's kind of awkward because... well... I am a man. My reaction is usually the same as yours was.

    I am just joking, people can be insensitive and just stupid. Do this for yourself not because someone said something stupid. Good luck!
  • susanhiding
    susanhiding Posts: 88 Member
    That is the worst.

    I was at Starbucks once and a guy in front of me said "Won't have to wait too long, right?" I thought he was talking about the line, but then he pointed to my belly. I decided to get a skinny latte that day.

    I tell all my guy friends to never, ever ask a woman if she is pregnant, unless you know with 100% certainty that she is!
  • jenwalton
    jenwalton Posts: 87 Member
    I got asked this a few times. And then, the piece de resistance... this woman on the T (Boston's subway system) insisted on me taking her seat. I shook my head because I was okay standing. Then she walks over, and in very broken English yells at me, "No! You pregnant lady! You seat! Seat now!". It was terrifying. I sat. And went for a run as soon as I got home.

    I am so sorry!! And yet I can't stop laughing!! That is terrible!!!!!
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    I got asked this a few times. And then, the piece de resistance... this woman on the T (Boston's subway system) insisted on me taking her seat. I shook my head because I was okay standing. Then she walks over, and in very broken English yells at me, "No! You pregnant lady! You seat! Seat now!". It was terrifying. I sat. And went for a run as soon as I got home.

    Id run too if I got yelled at in broken english
  • jasperann
    jasperann Posts: 136 Member
    I had this happen to me. I was walking across to a store across the parking lot and I crossed in front of a car stopped at a stop sign and my family for some reason didn't follow me, and the man says as he is passing that he will stop any day to let a pregnant woman walk across the street. I was so embarrassed. Sadly it wasn't my breaking point and I continued to gain weight for a few more months after that. =(
  • lik_11
    lik_11 Posts: 433 Member
    This happened to me, too. I vowed to never again wear that shirt.

    (Unfortunately- the shirt wasn't the problem.)
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    I got asked this a few times. And then, the piece de resistance... this woman on the T (Boston's subway system) insisted on me taking her seat. I shook my head because I was okay standing. Then she walks over, and in very broken English yells at me, "No! You pregnant lady! You seat! Seat now!". It was terrifying. I sat. And went for a run as soon as I got home.

    I am so sorry!! And yet I can't stop laughing!! That is terrible!!!!!

    I am about ready to pee my pants even retelling the story. I hope to see that little lady some time now that I'm slimmer and be like, "Seat! Seat now!"
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    I got asked this a few times. And then, the piece de resistance... this woman on the T (Boston's subway system) insisted on me taking her seat. I shook my head because I was okay standing. Then she walks over, and in very broken English yells at me, "No! You pregnant lady! You seat! Seat now!". It was terrifying. I sat. And went for a run as soon as I got home.

    Id run too if I got yelled at in broken english

    "You seat! Seat naoooowwwww!" :laugh:
  • DianaR13
    DianaR13 Posts: 5
    I think its safe to say that if you're a woman and you've ever hand the pouchy or round belly, you have been accused of being pregnant. Some people...I know they don't mean it.
    I'm looking for MFP buddies too because sometimes I get swept up in my day and forget to eat right or at least jump rope on the front porch. It's good to have friends to keep you motivated.And for you to motivate.
  • I can't even count how many times i've been asked. All the women in my family have this body type-- broad hips, big boobs, and any extra weight goes straight to the pooch. It's the worst, and the only consolation is how MORTIFIED you know the person asking must be after you tell them to piss off.