Feel like it's slipping away
cathomer
Posts: 88
My motivation that is, my will to carry on, my belief that I can ever be anything but fat. Somehow I feel like I'm not meant to be beautiful, slim, and fit. I really want to be toned and gorgeous, and turn heads, but I don't know if that can ever happen. Do you think some people are just meant to be in the background, dull, there for others, but never having anything for themselves?
I feel so inadequate, the women, bar one, that I'm doing the c25k with are starting week 5 today and want to start with the 20 minute run, which I don't feel I can do yet, I just feel like I'm holding them all back. I'm on the same page as one of the ladies, which is great, but even she's faster than me. I'm really overweight and asthmatic, which is worse at this time of the year anyway, but I still feel like I should be faster.
I don't know what I need, a slap maybe, no idea.
I feel so inadequate, the women, bar one, that I'm doing the c25k with are starting week 5 today and want to start with the 20 minute run, which I don't feel I can do yet, I just feel like I'm holding them all back. I'm on the same page as one of the ladies, which is great, but even she's faster than me. I'm really overweight and asthmatic, which is worse at this time of the year anyway, but I still feel like I should be faster.
I don't know what I need, a slap maybe, no idea.
0
Replies
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same here...0
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You sounds SO down.
You have done something amazing - you've decided to lose weight for yourself and your baby. More importantly, you've decided to exercise - which will make you so much healthier and happier.
20 minutes is a long run. When I started running, my goal was to run just to the next street lamp. Then I walked to the next one. Then I ran the third. I didn't even do that until I had been walking for a while.
All that matters is you START. One day at a time.
The reason I have the fish on my counter is from Dora from Finding Nemo. Remember her motto: JUST KEEP SWIMMING JUST KEEP SWIMMING JUST KEEP SWIMMING.
Good luck.0 -
haha, that made me giggle, thank you, must remember that!
Yes, it's only one run, it's meant to be the last one, we're currently running five minutes for the longest stretch. I'm doing really well, but most of the others are just so much fitter than me. I can run really well sometimes, but other times I get so out of breath, I'm not sure what determines how well I run, it's always the same time of night, I never eat first.
keeping on swimming...0 -
if you compare yourself to others, you will always fall short. Stop doing that. Do this for yourself and if others are ahead then it is what it is. You need to be the best version of you, not anyone else. Feel better! You can do this!0
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My motivation that is, my will to carry on, my belief that I can ever be anything but fat. Somehow I feel like I'm not meant to be beautiful, slim, and fit. I really want to be toned and gorgeous, and turn heads, but I don't know if that can ever happen. Do you think some people are just meant to be in the background, dull, there for others, but never having anything for themselves?
I feel so inadequate, the women, bar one, that I'm doing the c25k with are starting week 5 today and want to start with the 20 minute run, which I don't feel I can do yet, I just feel like I'm holding them all back. I'm on the same page as one of the ladies, which is great, but even she's faster than me. I'm really overweight and asthmatic, which is worse at this time of the year anyway, but I still feel like I should be faster.
I don't know what I need, a slap maybe, no idea.
Truth? You are as beautiful and valuable as you choose to believe.0 -
Do ANYTHING but give up. If you give up, you'll never get ANYWHERE. I know you know this, but write it down and put it everywhere you can see it. Bathroom mirror, fridge door, dresser mirror...
Do ANYTHING but give up.0 -
My motivation that is, my will to carry on, my belief that I can ever be anything but fat. Somehow I feel like I'm not meant to be beautiful, slim, and fit. I really want to be toned and gorgeous, and turn heads, but I don't know if that can ever happen. Do you think some people are just meant to be in the background, dull, there for others, but never having anything for themselves?
I feel so inadequate, the women, bar one, that I'm doing the c25k with are starting week 5 today and want to start with the 20 minute run, which I don't feel I can do yet, I just feel like I'm holding them all back. I'm on the same page as one of the ladies, which is great, but even she's faster than me. I'm really overweight and asthmatic, which is worse at this time of the year anyway, but I still feel like I should be faster.
I don't know what I need, a slap maybe, no idea.
Winning the mental battle is the biggest challenge in anything we take on in life. You're listening to your inner gremlin. Don't. It's just a self-defeating voice. Make yours louder and stay on track.0 -
My motivation that is, my will to carry on, my belief that I can ever be anything but fat. Somehow I feel like I'm not meant to be beautiful, slim, and fit. I really want to be toned and gorgeous, and turn heads, but I don't know if that can ever happen.
First and foremost--you are beautiful. Your profile photo shows a beautiful young woman. If you are determined to loose weight, don't hold in your head some other idea of beauty. That's YOU now. Instead, think of how fit and healthy you will be.0 -
if you compare yourself to others, you will always fall short. Stop doing that. Do this for yourself and if others are ahead then it is what it is. You need to be the best version of you, not anyone else. Feel better! You can do this!
^^^^^^^^She is very smart!!0 -
I think the last thing you need is a slap, rather a hug would be better. Don't judge your self by others, but mark your progress with your self. I'm sure your health has improved as well as your time since you started your running. You are doing great. Don't be so hard on your self. You wouldn't let a friend talk to herself that way, be a decent friend and don't beat up a good person (you!)0
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haha, that made me giggle, thank you, must remember that!
Yes, it's only one run, it's meant to be the last one, we're currently running five minutes for the longest stretch. I'm doing really well, but most of the others are just so much fitter than me. I can run really well sometimes, but other times I get so out of breath, I'm not sure what determines how well I run, it's always the same time of night, I never eat first.
keeping on swimming...
You have already lost 75 lbs......BRAVO !!! Keep running, one day you will be running and it will click and you will
realize that you are doing it on your own and at your own pace.
DONT GIVE UP !!!0 -
You're already beautiful!!!
Please don't judge and compare yourself against others. There's always going to be someone slimmer, faster, smarter, funnier, or whatever .... that's just the way the world is.
Try to start comparing yourself to how far you could run last year, last month etc and you'll see that you're improving.
Stop whining and feeling sorry for yourself, cause you wont achieve anything that way, don't make excuses to alienate yourself from your exercise group. Just keep going, minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day! Make yourself a promise that when August 7th comes around next year, you'll be a better version of you!
You've a gorgeous smile and beautiful children who are going to want you around for a long time. But most importantly do this for YOU!0 -
Asthma can be a BIG motivation killer. I really struggle with mine in the summer months. One thing I've found is helpful is to change my goals when my asthma is bad to ensure I don't lose motivation.
October through May I can easily run 30+ minutes. June through September I have to run 5 minute intervals. When my asthma is bad I also change up my exercises to things that don't challege my breathing as much - like yoga or standard sets of weighlifting (with rest periods).
You are meant to be whoever you want to be. We recreate ourselves every day.0 -
Do ANYTHING but give up. If you give up, you'll never get ANYWHERE. I know you know this, but write it down and put it everywhere you can see it. Bathroom mirror, fridge door, dresser mirror...
Do ANYTHING but give up.
Buy the brightest sticky notes you can find, and post nice sayings everywhere you can! I had them on my fridge for a while< inside cupboards, bathroom mirror...you name it! I did this before I was trying to lose weight, I was just down in the dumps about some emotional things.
It works, and if nothing else it brings a smile to your face about how crazy you must look to others!0 -
In your picture holding the baby, you are beautiful. I don't know why you would ever feel less than. Maybe you are just not ready for the next step in C25K. There is nothing wrong with taking it at your own pace. You can't really judge yourself by anyone else. Live your own life, exercise at your own pace and even if you fail, start over and NEVER QUIT. Each step is a victory in itself. Handle today's challenges today and face tomorrow when it gets here, that's all you can do. If you give up now you'll always wish you had kept going.0
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My motivation that is, my will to carry on, my belief that I can ever be anything but fat. Somehow I feel like I'm not meant to be beautiful, slim, and fit. I really want to be toned and gorgeous, and turn heads, but I don't know if that can ever happen. Do you think some people are just meant to be in the background, dull, there for others, but never having anything for themselves?
I feel so inadequate, the women, bar one, that I'm doing the c25k with are starting week 5 today and want to start with the 20 minute run, which I don't feel I can do yet, I just feel like I'm holding them all back. I'm on the same page as one of the ladies, which is great, but even she's faster than me. I'm really overweight and asthmatic, which is worse at this time of the year anyway, but I still feel like I should be faster.
I don't know what I need, a slap maybe, no idea.
(SMACK)
"YOU CAN ACT LIKE A MAN"
Sorry. Godfather was on this weekend. Seemed appropriate.
I workout day in and day out with an ex-Navy guy who is stronger than me in every way. He gets faster gains, more definition, and better results and we do the exact same routine, take the same protien, and eat similar. I hate him.
Everyone is different. The same exercise will have different effects on different people. Do your best and stay motivated. You are being healthy for you, not to keep up with someone else.
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Its been a while since I've looked at the c25k program, but aren't you supposed to be able to walk 20 minutes without stopping before you begin the program? It's a great goal, and running has always been THE THING to help me incinerate calories. I whole heartedly believe its the way to go. And YOU CAN run a 5k! Make smart mini-goals to get to that point. If your group leaves you feeling lousy about yourself, then they aren't for you. Move on. Setting a realistic goal with un unrealistic timeline is the same thing as setting an unrealistic (aka unachievable goal.) And doing that will only injure your self-confidence further. I'm not saying you shouldn't push yourself, but your post sounds so defeated. I just want you to make smart goals and see you succeed.0
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Hang in there. This is a long journey. Some days feel terribly overwhelming. You are going to screw up. We all have times (at least I do) where we don't do things "the right way". It is ok though. If you make a mistake for a meal or for a day let it only be that. Get right back on the horse.
MFP is amazing. I have tried everything and always just been fat. This program is really working though. I have a lot left to go but am really enjoying taking my life back. You will as well 0 -
I feel the same way sometimes, but I just suck it up and keep at it. If I don't get skinny, at least I'll be more healthy.0
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@cathomer, you're beautiful and you have gorgeous children. Are we all meant to be slender and society's perception of "beautiful", no, not really. But that doesn't mean that we can't be gorgeous and wonderful in other ways. There's no need to "be in the background, dull, there for others, but never having anything for themselves"...this is YOUR life and you can chose to live it as you wish!
For years I was a chubby wallflower because my perception was that people wouldn't like me because of my weight. I let my weight become who I was. A couple years ago I was given the opportunity to be the female romantic lead in a community theater musical. Those roles are typically left for the slender, "perfect" girls. When I thanked the director for the opportunity he told me that he hadn't even noticed my weight--rather, he saw that my personality and skills transcended that barrier.
It was an act to start with, of course, but if you believe in yourself enough, then you will have the confidence to believe you're beautiful, and believe you're worth so much more. Take a look at yourself...notice what you love about you. Play those things up. Of course keep pushing yourself to do better, be better, but also take time to know that you're wonderful, just because you're you.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt Best of luck! 0 -
don't give up. your are beautiful. and you can do any thing if you set your mind to it. you can get slim and get the body you always dreamed of. but it takes hard work and determination. just watch your calories and exercise and you'll start seeing results. as for running. don't push yourself too hard right away, if your not used to it. running speed is something you build up over time. start running at a slower pace your comfortable with, and then gradually increase it as you go along.
don't give up. you can do any thing you put your mind too. your are a very beautiful person.0 -
You have already lost 75 lbs......BRAVO !!! Keep running, one day you will be running and it will click and you will
Noooooooo, I've not lost anything hardly, that's how much I need to lose lol. Right at the start here.
Thank you for all your replies, I do need to stop being so hard on myself, habit of a lifetime really. I'm so glad I've got mfp to come on when I feel like this though, it's what's always been missing, before I'd just have been on my own feeling bad, well, my partner's here but for some reason it's harder to listen to him.
ethomso0105 - that's amazing, I'd love to be on stage, one day maybe! you definitely beautiful enough to play a lead
I could walk for ages before doing it, I think you're supposed to be able to run a mile or something, but then that's seems strange as you start off so slow if you can already run a mile. I repeated week three, and that was great, but only did two days of week 4 as I couldn't do the 3rd. Was going to go tonight and do an extra day 1 of week 4 but I got put off when they all wanted to do the 20 minute run first.0 -
1 pound, 1 accomplishment at a time. That's all you need to do.
When I started this, I didn't want to walk for 20 minutes and there's no way in Hades, I could run for 20 minutes. Heck, I can't run for 20 minutes now. But I could also not ride my bike around the block. I couldn't do more than 90 seconds on the elliptical, etc. I wanted to give up too, BUT I DIDN'T!
All you have to do is try. You will get better and stronger and faster each time. I promise.0 -
haha, that made me giggle, thank you, must remember that!
Yes, it's only one run, it's meant to be the last one, we're currently running five minutes for the longest stretch. I'm doing really well, but most of the others are just so much fitter than me. I can run really well sometimes, but other times I get so out of breath, I'm not sure what determines how well I run, it's always the same time of night, I never eat first.
keeping on swimming...
I've been stuck at 1 minute run, 2 minutes walk for about three weeks now. Some days I feel fantastic and think, "Wow! I should be able to move up next week." Then that day rolls around and, after running the first 1 minute 30 second segment, I know there's NO WAY I'm going to be able to do that and make it through the whole workout. I do what I can do. I know when my body's had too much (I try not to let my HR get above 170ish), and I start to back off a little at that point. I also do some conditioning exercises for my legs and core after doing my walk run on M, W, and F. I also do LOTS of deep stretching through the legs and core. I definitely feel stronger than when I started, and I'm going to try to do 00:01:30 running segments this week. Even if I can't do it through the whole workout, I'm going to do at least one in the beginning, one in the middle, and one at the end. On days I feel stronger, I'll add more.0 -
Try gentler exercise at first. Something you can feel confident doing. Walking the baby in the stroller for a half hour each day is a good start. Use some 5 pound weights for toning arms. Don't compare yourself to Olympians like your runner friends.
If you can't look gorgeous, I have to accept that I can't either. And I'm already feeling much better and no longer depressed. Just keep going, and the depression and disbelief will fall away and be replaced by someone you want to be.0 -
I have asthma too. I find that an allergy pill and a proactive puff of an inhaler goes a long way!!
75 lbs is quite the accomplishment, by the way! Look at how far you have come, rather than how far you still want to go.0 -
These feelings are normal, but you haveee to keep pushing, you have to keep trying, because if you don't, nothing will change. This is something that you have control over, even if at times it feels like you don't. It's hard, and this is going to be a constant uphill battle, but you WILL lose weight, and you WILL see results, if you just keep at it. Remain consistent, keep working at it, and you WILL lose the weight, things WILL change. You just have to remain committed, no matter how down or negative you are feeling. Just keep pushing. Sometimes we overthink it, we start thinking about the "what if's" and the "I don't know's". At those times, try not to think. Don't think, and just do. It sounds easier said than done, but if you can learn to shut your brain off sometimes, it will help a great deal. Just remember, nothing will be accomplished if you don't try, and as long as you keep trying, you WILL succeed.0
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Don't be so hard on yourself. Running is tough!
You just need to adjust things to meet what you can do. I have a collagen disorder so I can easily dislocate a joint, break a bone, and I get stress fractures very easily, but I still run. I just know my limitations. That's all you have to do. Tweak it to work for you.
I don't know if you have been watching the Olympics, but look at Oscar Pistorius. He is a double amputee, but is an Olympic sprinter! The only thing that's in your way is negative thinking and self-doubt. If you can overcome that, you can overcome anything.0 -
Don't over do it. Everybody is different and you have to go at your own pace! One day you will get there. Heck I have been trying to run and I can barely run for more than 5 minutes. So more power to ya!! You are doing so great, just stay on track and one day you will get there! Just remember, it didn't happen over night, so losing weight won't either.0
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I don't run/walk with others because it always seems like we are never the same speed.I have friends that are on the same track at the same time and we talk after we are done but I never run with them. It is ok to repeat a week if you need to. Remember it is also a mind game with yourself. You can do this! Don't worry about speed just get through the intervals (is what I've been told)
Good Job getting to week 5!0
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