I feel so incredibly bad

Inspired2Bthin
Inspired2Bthin Posts: 6
in Motivation and Support
I litterally can't sleep just because I started thinking about how I let myself go. I gained 40 pounds in 1 year! How is that even possible? It was a tough year and I know I ate a lot because of stress and emotions I couldn't control, but 40 pounds is sooo much... I've never felt unhappier. And even though I love mfp and my mfp pals have given me so much support, right now I feel like crap. I'm 19 years old. I shouldn't be ashamed of myself when I walk out in public. I should be enjoying my life like a normal young girl. I'm definitely not giving up, hell no, I NEVER want to look/feel like this again. I don't even fit in my clothes from last summer anymore. Today I wanted to go out and enjoy the warm weather, but I didn't, because nothing fits except my joggings. This is the worst feeling ever. I could've never imagined that being overweight could control your life so much. It's going to take some time, I know, but I can't wait to be happy.

I'm sorry, I just had to get this off of my chest. It feels good to be able to talk about this on here.

xoxo

Replies

  • MissTomGettingThin
    MissTomGettingThin Posts: 776 Member
    You will get back into those clothes!
    You will!
  • TravisBurns
    TravisBurns Posts: 353 Member
    I had the same thing happen to me. I was at 354 pounds! Highest weight ever for me. Major depression, relationship fallouts, etc. And I had all but given up every ounce of hope. I managed to cling on to that little bit I had and worked with it. Here I am about 3 months into the journey once again, closing in on getting out of these damn 300's. It gets easier and easier day by day. That is for sure. Keep a positive mindset
  • schaapj2
    schaapj2 Posts: 320 Member
    Take that feeling you have now...put on your exercise pants and WALK WALK WALK.....and everyday wake up and remind yourself how much you hate the 40 pounds you gained and how its made you feel....use that inspiration to get up and walk again. You can do it....stay strong-it's one good decision, 1 mile, and 1 pound at a time!
  • Corsetopia
    Corsetopia Posts: 307 Member
    I know how you feel. I gained the same amount of weight in a year. I had clinical rotations that were 12 hour night shifts. I was eating anything and everything to get through the night. It's like suddenly I woke up and I was huge....so I decided to make a change! Plus, no more night shifts helps. You can SO do this. Even if it's a little progress a week, it's PROGRESS and just think of it this way; you're 19, you have time to take the weight off and keep it off =]
  • mlynn1974
    mlynn1974 Posts: 5
    I know how you feel. I never thought that I would let my weight interfere with my life but I do. At times I'm embarrassed and at other times I'm ashamed. Also, I'm just uncomfortable! I've lost 20 lbs but I have 70 more to go. I learned a few weeks ago that my oldest nephew weighs 75 lbs. I'm carrying a 9-year-old on my body frame, so no wonder I'm uncomfortable with how my clothes fit and how my body moves.

    Food is my drug, my friend, my comfort, but I have had to let that go. I still have times where emotions take over my brain and I eat like crazy, but the next day I'm back at it. It's easy to beat ourselves up--rarely do we give ourselves credit for the little battles we win every day.

    You WILL succeed, you WILL be healthy, and you WILL be happy. :smile:
  • halobender
    halobender Posts: 780 Member
    It happens ... I had gotten all the way down to my goal weight and was super fit. Some bad stuff happened and I was unable to workout for about 9 months and gained 25 pounds and lost all of my muscle ...

    I'm back at it now ... and somehow it feels harder than it was before. As one might say "Keep punching!"
  • MarkC1963
    MarkC1963 Posts: 51 Member
    Channel those negative bad feelings into intensity and determination to hit your fitness program like never before. Sometimes bad emotions like resentments, bitterness, jealousy, rage can be turned on a dime into positive intensity and determination to achieve your goals and to exhibit to all the nay sayers and faithless in you that in fact you CAN!!!

    Have at it with complete abandon!!!! I have no doubt you can do it. You did if before and you can do it over and over again. Just find that right motivation and it will carry you through. No doubt!!!!!!!
  • LifestyleChange33
    LifestyleChange33 Posts: 169 Member
    Ah sweetie that is less than 1lb per week. It happens to the best of us. Now it is time to focus on the reason youre here- forgive yourself and think about the now positive and healthy direction youre going.
  • Natashaa1991
    Natashaa1991 Posts: 866 Member
    i had my freshmen 15 two years ago and I felt the same. don't worry. just try eating normal, don't ever starve yourself. if you haven't been on that weight for a longer period of time (you said it's one year, that's pretty short) your body will go back to normal easily if you just start eating like you used to (when you were on your regular weight).
    xx
    we're here for support :)
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
    I was 125 lbs (from an ED) in 2006 when I met my husband but after we got married in in 2007 he always made sure I ate and I gained 55 lbs in almost 5 years. I am trying to lose 20 lbs of it right now and maybe 10 lbs later after that. I've been walking and watching everything I eat but the weight is coming off really slooooow!!!!! I have faith in both of us we can lose the weight.
  • FitzyFitzpatrick
    FitzyFitzpatrick Posts: 188 Member
    There are online inside-the-home walking videos (YouTube=Leslie Sansone) that you can start with, and not venture outside. Once you get back on the positive ground, you can get out there once again.

    Don't feel so bad, we all have ghosts in our closet. I still won't exercise in front of my husband...and here he is doing all P90Xing, and getting somewhere!

    Be brave, and FR me if you'd like.
  • Inspired2Bthin
    Inspired2Bthin Posts: 6
    Thank you so much, all of you. Every single message made me feel a little bit better. I'm so glad I posted this :).

    Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you.

    xoxo

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