Can't commit - anyone else experience this?
Replies
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make sure the problem isn't that you're convinced you can't commit and so act in a way that fulfills this belief.
We all label ourselves to a certain extent - if you believe you can't commit, you won't. Because instead of pushing through when it feels hard you'll give up because you don't think you're capable of anything else.
You are capable. everyone is. You just have to realise it.0 -
I never committed. I just adjusted and tweaked to make it work.0
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I had NEVER been an exerciser - in fact, exercise and I, for the majority of my life, have NEVER gotten along. <
This is the kid who faked a sprained ankle EVERY year to get out of Track and Field in school :laugh: I, like you, would have great intentions and I'd start something, just to find it 'too hard' or say 'I don't have enough time', or come up with some other bogus excuse and quit before I ever ever reaaaaalllly got started. Then, I saw this picture:
Umm - ewww... so I got determined. A friend told me about the C25k program and started running... it was Hard as HELL and I wanted to stop SO many times... but i was so sick of being fat, that i dug deep and thru sheer grit and determination I kept going!! The thought of cute dresses, short shorts and not having to suck in my tummy ALL the friggin time, inspired me... I wanted to be comfortable with ME (for once in my life) and I was finally sick enough of being FAT that I decided this was going to be the time I accomplished what i set out to do!
I adopted a motto, a mantra (if you will) "JUST DECIDE" - and sometimes I really do have to "Just Decide" to keep going. By saying "Just Decide" to myself, it gives ME the power!!... and is sometimes the difference between 5k and 10k - hell sometimes, "Just Decide" is the difference between getting out of bed rather than turning off the alarm and going back to sleep!... Trust me - sometimes I find myself having *small temper tantrums* in the middle of a run, but hey... I "Just Decide" to keep going... and I do... exercise is now addicting, I crave it, I need it, and I actually WANT to do it! Sweat is my Body Crying, and I love it!
Recently, I started weight training, too! AND Wowee - that is making an even bigger difference in my body! I wish i started doing this at the beginning!!! Cause I am seeing Muscles develop and I LOVE them, I am really happy these days, I feel good, I look good and I have WAY more confidence. I was right, I love to wear cute dresses, and short shorts AND I don't have to suck in my tummy all the time, I am now comfortable in my own skin - it happened... and all because I decided to "JUST DECIDE"!! Check it out:
So, how tired are YOU of being fat? Are you ready to "JUST DECIDE" to get the body YOU want, or do you want to continue to find excuses, give up (again) and be unhappy and uncomfortable? Lemme know if you want a friend who will both hold your hand and kick your *kitten* until you reach your goal... you CAN do this... go ahead... JUST DECIDE.0 -
I had NEVER been an exerciser - in fact, exercise and I, for the majority of my life, have NEVER gotten along. <
This is the kid who faked a sprained ankle EVERY year to get out of Track and Field in school :laugh: I, like you, would have great intentions and I'd start something, just to find it 'too hard' or say 'I don't have enough time', or come up with some other bogus excuse and quit before I ever ever reaaaaalllly got started. Then, I saw this picture:
Umm - ewww... so I got determined. A friend told me about the C25k program and started running... it was Hard as HELL and I wanted to stop SO many times... but i was so sick of being fat, that i dug deep and thru sheer grit and determination I kept going!! The thought of cute dresses, short shorts and not having to suck in my tummy ALL the friggin time, inspired me... I wanted to be comfortable with ME (for once in my life) and I was finally sick enough of being FAT that I decided this was going to be the time I accomplished what i set out to do!
I adopted a motto, a mantra (if you will) "JUST DECIDE" - and sometimes I really do have to "Just Decide" to keep going. By saying "Just Decide" to myself, it gives ME the power!!... and is sometimes the difference between 5k and 10k - hell sometimes, "Just Decide" is the difference between getting out of bed rather than turning off the alarm and going back to sleep!... Trust me - sometimes I find myself having *small temper tantrums* in the middle of a run, but hey... I "Just Decide" to keep going... and I do... exercise is now addicting, I crave it, I need it, and I actually WANT to do it! Sweat is my Body Crying, and I love it!
Recently, I started weight training, too! AND Wowee - that is making an even bigger difference in my body! I wish i started doing this at the beginning!!! Cause I am seeing Muscles develop and I LOVE them, I am really happy these days, I feel good, I look good and I have WAY more confidence. I was right, I love to wear cute dresses, and short shorts AND I don't have to suck in my tummy all the time, I am now comfortable in my own skin - it happened... and all because I decided to "JUST DECIDE"!! Check it out:
So, how tired are YOU of being fat? Are you ready to "JUST DECIDE" to get the body YOU want, or do you want to continue to find excuses, give up (again) and be unhappy and uncomfortable? Lemme know if you want a friend who will both hold your hand and kick your *kitten* until you reach your goal... you CAN do this... go ahead... JUST DECIDE.
Holy Moly, this is incredible!!!!0 -
I have posted and reposted this and I'm going to share it with you:
Thought for today...so many people seem frustrated this week with their gains/losses, ect. And I just want to say...Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither were you. That extra weight you're carrying, the bad eating habits, the self destructive behaviors (and we all have them)....those things didn't happen overnight. Many of us have been perfecting "fat" as a lifestyle for a long, long time. If you haven't given up in spite of a bad day or a bad week, if you've made just a few good choices in a week of bad ones, if you changed one old habit or are doing one thing differently then you are doing great. We can't reasonably expect to be different after 20+ years after doing something because we've decided to be. So, even if your scale didn't twitch or your measurements stayed the same...you're still building something new, and you're doing great. Changes will happen, we just have to remember it took time to get here...it will take time to get to where we want to be as well. Hang in there everyone!
...now, with that being said. It is hard to "commit" for a lot of reasons. Many of the mistakes many of us have made include "gearing up" for a diet and psyching ourselves out, feeling like we have to do better IMMEDIATELY. And quite frankly...it just adds too much pressure. You have a life, work, friends, family....sometimes I feel like I am always playing with my phone because I have to log immediately or I will forget what I ate (I record almost everything that passes my lips). It is hard to make MFP part of your life at first. The best advice I can give you is to start with small goals. Goal one....log every day, and be mindful of your calories. And when you accomplish your goals, find a new one.
A few more suggestions....buy a food scale. I use mine every day. Go to your local dollar store and buy extra measuring cups and spoons. I went and bought 2 more sets (1/4, 1/3, 1/2, 1 cup plus teaspoons/tablespoons for...you guessed it. $1). I suggest this because then you always have something to measure your food out with. I've also heard of people buying extra sets and then leaving whatever size they need right in the container ...for example: leaving a tablespoon in the Chia seeds (1 serving=1 tbsp), 1/2 cup in the cereal, 1/3 cup in the oatmeal. It varies for everyone but if you do this you will always have the measurement you need and maybe that will help you. Learn what your glasses really hold. Just because you bought glasses that are 8 oz, does that mean you fill them to the top for 8oz or an inch below? All styles are different. Grab your glass and a measuring cup and figure out what is a cup in your glassware....after you have an idea, you can eyeball it instead of measuring out a cup of milk every time. It is also a good idea to do this with yogurt and cereal. After awhile, you wont need to measure everything out and it will help you when you go out or eat elsewhere to be able to eyeball how much you REALLY have (people tend to think they have less than they really do).0 -
Yep. I think many/most of us do experience this on some level. The key is to KEEP GOING. Failure only happens when you give up completely.0
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I had NEVER been an exerciser - in fact, exercise and I, for the majority of my life, have NEVER gotten along. <
This is the kid who faked a sprained ankle EVERY year to get out of Track and Field in school :laugh: I, like you, would have great intentions and I'd start something, just to find it 'too hard' or say 'I don't have enough time', or come up with some other bogus excuse and quit before I ever ever reaaaaalllly got started. Then, I saw this picture:
Umm - ewww... so I got determined. A friend told me about the C25k program and started running... it was Hard as HELL and I wanted to stop SO many times... but i was so sick of being fat, that i dug deep and thru sheer grit and determination I kept going!! The thought of cute dresses, short shorts and not having to suck in my tummy ALL the friggin time, inspired me... I wanted to be comfortable with ME (for once in my life) and I was finally sick enough of being FAT that I decided this was going to be the time I accomplished what i set out to do!
I adopted a motto, a mantra (if you will) "JUST DECIDE" - and sometimes I really do have to "Just Decide" to keep going. By saying "Just Decide" to myself, it gives ME the power!!... and is sometimes the difference between 5k and 10k - hell sometimes, "Just Decide" is the difference between getting out of bed rather than turning off the alarm and going back to sleep!... Trust me - sometimes I find myself having *small temper tantrums* in the middle of a run, but hey... I "Just Decide" to keep going... and I do... exercise is now addicting, I crave it, I need it, and I actually WANT to do it! Sweat is my Body Crying, and I love it!
Recently, I started weight training, too! AND Wowee - that is making an even bigger difference in my body! I wish i started doing this at the beginning!!! Cause I am seeing Muscles develop and I LOVE them, I am really happy these days, I feel good, I look good and I have WAY more confidence. I was right, I love to wear cute dresses, and short shorts AND I don't have to suck in my tummy all the time, I am now comfortable in my own skin - it happened... and all because I decided to "JUST DECIDE"!! Check it out:
So, how tired are YOU of being fat? Are you ready to "JUST DECIDE" to get the body YOU want, or do you want to continue to find excuses, give up (again) and be unhappy and uncomfortable? Lemme know if you want a friend who will both hold your hand and kick your *kitten* until you reach your goal... you CAN do this... go ahead... JUST DECIDE.
You Rock Lemon!!!
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Here's my tip: Sit down and ask yourself why you're doing this. What is your goal? Why do you want to accomplish it? Why is this important? The real reason, not the one you tell everyone else. Maybe it's your energy level, your kids, your social life, or you just hate the way you feel when you wake up. Whatever. Write that down. When you reach day 4 next time and decide that you don't need to try so hard, look at that piece of paper and think about why you started this journey. Is it still important? If not, then maybe you don't need to be here at all. But I'm guessing the answer will be yes. So read that paper, recommit every few days be reminding yourself this isn't about weight-it's about your *real reason for doing it.* Everytime you wan to cheat, ask yourself which is more important-the cheat or the reason for doing this? I think you'll find that this is where the real motivation lies.0
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OMG - I hear you. I do well for a few days, even a week, but we socialize (and this always includes food and beverages) a lot and it's so hard to stay on-track. And then once I goof - it takes me several days to get back on track. I need to find a way to stay on track while eating out and going to parties where there is just way too much temptation. Any suggestions?.0
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I totally understand the yo yo part! I'm in the same boat as you and I ask myself ''am I ready to commit'' . I wrote down all of the reasons this morning why I want to lose weight and I realized that I had a lot more than I thought. Try writing down the reasons why you want to put in the efforts. I'll add ya as a friend and we can motivate each other!0
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I go through this too. Standing in front of the mirror right before or after a shower sure motivates me...lol
Honestly, it is hard. I really do struggle. Here is something that helps me... purchase a note pad to be used only for this and start listing every reason you have to loose weight. Some of mine are;
I wanna physically play longer with my 2 year old grand-daughter without loosing my breath.
I wanna take the five minute walk from the parking lot through the building, up the stairs and to my desk without being embarrassed if I pass someone because I wonder what they think re my hard breathing.
I wanna stop making excuses to my 10 yr old and 6 year old sons as to why I will not take them swimming.
I wanna stop having to watch my blood pressure.
I wanna get on a rollar coaster without worring if the seatbelt will wrap around my middle.
keep adding to your list everytime something crosses your mind and when you feel yourself slipping, pull out your notepad and start reading.
I also put in embarrassing moments re my weight with dates and times so I can remind myself that I do not want to experience that again.
Aslo, have someone follow up on your postings of things eatten, water drank, exersize, ect. My Dr. actually told me to download this app on my phone and she wants to monitor me by monitoring it. Just knowing someone is watching and will hold me accountable helps motivate me.
Good luck0 -
Maybe you should ask yourself how bad you really want to make changes in your life and health. If you can't commit, you might not be ready, or just don't want it that bad.
If you're sabotaging yourself for some other reason, you need to look inward to figure that out as well...and why its happening.0 -
I've had the same problem my entire life, I teeter totter with weight i go up some, lose a heap then go up. I am finding it difficult to figure out what works. This is working for me. I just have to have people who help. You start on your own, but need a support group to keep you going in this situation. I am on the right track and plan on staying that way. I want to lose some weight before i head to Australia for a wedding in Nov. Its going to be hard, it's going to be REALLY hard. But I know I can do it. Thats all you need. To believe you can do it. Keep up the work and you'll see results. Add me if you need encouragement.0
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Set your home page on your pc as myfitnesspal, it may help train yourself to continue to log on and follow through with it0
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What worked for me this time around....about my 10th try, is journaling when it gets rough. I simply notice that I'm having a hard day and that what I'm doing is really tough. Then I re-commit myself to my goals which are health related. Being overweight for your age and height has health implications and for me I realized i had to start being responsible for the parts I could control. Looking better is just a nice reward for being healthier, its not the focus. Also have healthy snacks on hand for when your struggling/craving. Stuff that healthy snack in your mouth and down it and wait 10 mins, the craving will likely pass. Good luck! You'll be ready when your ready, do it for you.0
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It's all about will power...If you have the Will, you have the Power! So I think you need to seriously ask yourself, who has the power? You? or Something/someone else?
Your future body/health is there waiting on you. Question is, are you ready to go get it?
Good Luck!!
ETA: I had to ask myself these every same questions. I've made the commitment and I am going to get my future body and health.0 -
Want motivation ??
Check out what this guy did. http://www.fit2fat2fit.com/
He went from Fit to Fat to Fit again. If that body is inside that bigger body, than maybe there is hope for me yet (I look like the bigger guy).
You need to break the chains of addiction a bad diet causes. Then worry about the exercise stuff. Without eating right, it just won't work out. This time I am not over-exercising before I get the diet right. It takes too much out of you. Food is a drug and is also the key to peak performance. Exercise can become a pleasure (a nice walk, bike ride etc.) but food addiction will take all your will power.
Focus on that0 -
TO THE OP,
To me,
i had to believe it WAS possible.
I HAD TO HAVE HOPE.
I had to be able to picture myself succeeding, being healthy again, being fit again, and BE ABLE TO really really BELIEVE that picture.
It wasn't i didn't want it bad enough,
it was i did not really really believe it WAS possible. I had somehow, come to accept "this is how i am now, and this is how it will be from now on." I really believed that.
That WAS just how i saw myself.
but i made myself develop a NEW mental picture of *me* in my mind, I pictured myself doing it right, losing that weight, being thin again, being active again,
doing it well,
living the way i want to live again,
and i stay focused on THAT mental picture of ME, in my mind.
I tend to give up on things i do NOT really think are even possible. (this is why i do not hit on George Clooney:laugh: )
BUT,
if i think it IS possible, i can keep striving towards it.
I had a poster once, that said, "If you can picture it,
you can achieve it."
or something like that. Obviously, there are some caveats to that, but, you have to BELIEVE you CAN do it.
one day at a time.
If it seems overwhelming or impossible,
don't look at the whole mountain.
Just keep watching your feet take another step forward,
day
by
day.
one step at a time.
one day at a time.
You can and will develop the willpower by practicing it
and by doing it. You will begin to see it IS possible.
One step at a time.
don't tell yourself, "i have to lose 30 lbs and get into a size 4" or whatever,
INSTEAD,
tell yourself,
"just for today, i will stay under my calorie limit, for this day,
and i will move my feet a bit more than i did yesterday."
We can do most anything for one (1) day. MInce it down into smaller portions, look at just this day, this day right now, jsut for THIS day, you will take good care of you.....for me, the determination, the belief i COULD change and the inner strength came AFTER i saw i could take steps to a better me.
and then one more step.
If you backslide,
(and you will now and then, you have old ingrained habits and craves that will take a while to master)
just get back up again. Dont' quit.
"The greatest glory is not in never failing,
but in getting back up again every time you fail."
overtime, you will develop new habits, new strength.
overtime, your mess ups will be less severe of a mess up, and the mess ups will become fewer and farther between. Your new habits will become stronger,
and stronger, with practice.
AND DO USE THAT FOOD DIARY,
LOG EVERY SINGLE BITE,
EVERY LIQUID,
EVERY CONDIMENT,
EVERY SNACK.
EVERY DAY.
good days, bad days, EVERY day, take 5 minute to log in your food.
every day.
you can have your food diary open, or private, but USE IT.
Watch for patterns as you log the days you did well, study what DOES work for you.
Give yourself a lil time to master the new habits, the new mental image of yourself succeeding. You are ten miles into the woods,
you will have to walk ten miles to get back out of the woods.
one step at a time. just watch your feet for now, and celebrate each time those feet take one step in right direction. Before you know it, you might find yourself a few yards,
then a few miles,
out of those woods. GOOD LUCK, and believe in yourself. DO whatever it takes to see yourself differently in your own mind, to be able to PICTURE YOURSELF SUCCEEDING.
.
.0 -
I had NEVER been an exerciser - in fact, exercise and I, for the majority of my life, have NEVER gotten along. <
This is the kid who faked a sprained ankle EVERY year to get out of Track and Field in school :laugh: I, like you, would have great intentions and I'd start something, just to find it 'too hard' or say 'I don't have enough time', or come up with some other bogus excuse and quit before I ever ever reaaaaalllly got started. Then, I saw this picture:
Umm - ewww... so I got determined. A friend told me about the C25k program and started running... it was Hard as HELL and I wanted to stop SO many times... but i was so sick of being fat, that i dug deep and thru sheer grit and determination I kept going!! The thought of cute dresses, short shorts and not having to suck in my tummy ALL the friggin time, inspired me... I wanted to be comfortable with ME (for once in my life) and I was finally sick enough of being FAT that I decided this was going to be the time I accomplished what i set out to do!
I adopted a motto, a mantra (if you will) "JUST DECIDE" - and sometimes I really do have to "Just Decide" to keep going. By saying "Just Decide" to myself, it gives ME the power!!... and is sometimes the difference between 5k and 10k - hell sometimes, "Just Decide" is the difference between getting out of bed rather than turning off the alarm and going back to sleep!... Trust me - sometimes I find myself having *small temper tantrums* in the middle of a run, but hey... I "Just Decide" to keep going... and I do... exercise is now addicting, I crave it, I need it, and I actually WANT to do it! Sweat is my Body Crying, and I love it!
Recently, I started weight training, too! AND Wowee - that is making an even bigger difference in my body! I wish i started doing this at the beginning!!! Cause I am seeing Muscles develop and I LOVE them, I am really happy these days, I feel good, I look good and I have WAY more confidence. I was right, I love to wear cute dresses, and short shorts AND I don't have to suck in my tummy all the time, I am now comfortable in my own skin - it happened... and all because I decided to "JUST DECIDE"!! Check it out:
So, how tired are YOU of being fat? Are you ready to "JUST DECIDE" to get the body YOU want, or do you want to continue to find excuses, give up (again) and be unhappy and uncomfortable? Lemme know if you want a friend who will both hold your hand and kick your *kitten* until you reach your goal... you CAN do this... go ahead... JUST DECIDE.
gosh you are good LOL you should get into motivational speaking , you do it well
i wanted to leave my desk and go run
Celery and smoothies for everybody 0 -
I feel the exact same way, that no matter what I try to do to keep fit, I always end up going into a mode where I'm like ughh....I feel frumpy or I feel fat, or when my boyfriend or friends want to go somewhere that requires me to be in a bikini!!!!! OMG most horrifying feeling even though to them I don't look 'fat'. I do agree that it's a life change, I know evenutally that I will get to my goal; but the first part is usually the toughest amongst them all.
Keep determined (as I will try to myself), and then at some point the faith, drive, and motivation will follow and before you know it, you won't realize that the lifestyle change you made, is actually habitual and not 'routine'.
Take care everyone, and trust me when I say I know how you feel.0 -
Thanks for all of the input, everyone! I've found some great tips and new friends. Day by day, we can all achieve our goals.0
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I LAUGHED SO HARD AT YOUR REPLY!!! MM Celery!I had NEVER been an exerciser - in fact, exercise and I, for the majority of my life, have NEVER gotten along. <
This is the kid who faked a sprained ankle EVERY year to get out of Track and Field in school :laugh: I, like you, would have great intentions and I'd start something, just to find it 'too hard' or say 'I don't have enough time', or come up with some other bogus excuse and quit before I ever ever reaaaaalllly got started. Then, I saw this picture:
Umm - ewww... so I got determined. A friend told me about the C25k program and started running... it was Hard as HELL and I wanted to stop SO many times... but i was so sick of being fat, that i dug deep and thru sheer grit and determination I kept going!! The thought of cute dresses, short shorts and not having to suck in my tummy ALL the friggin time, inspired me... I wanted to be comfortable with ME (for once in my life) and I was finally sick enough of being FAT that I decided this was going to be the time I accomplished what i set out to do!
I adopted a motto, a mantra (if you will) "JUST DECIDE" - and sometimes I really do have to "Just Decide" to keep going. By saying "Just Decide" to myself, it gives ME the power!!... and is sometimes the difference between 5k and 10k - hell sometimes, "Just Decide" is the difference between getting out of bed rather than turning off the alarm and going back to sleep!... Trust me - sometimes I find myself having *small temper tantrums* in the middle of a run, but hey... I "Just Decide" to keep going... and I do... exercise is now addicting, I crave it, I need it, and I actually WANT to do it! Sweat is my Body Crying, and I love it!
Recently, I started weight training, too! AND Wowee - that is making an even bigger difference in my body! I wish i started doing this at the beginning!!! Cause I am seeing Muscles develop and I LOVE them, I am really happy these days, I feel good, I look good and I have WAY more confidence. I was right, I love to wear cute dresses, and short shorts AND I don't have to suck in my tummy all the time, I am now comfortable in my own skin - it happened... and all because I decided to "JUST DECIDE"!! Check it out:
So, how tired are YOU of being fat? Are you ready to "JUST DECIDE" to get the body YOU want, or do you want to continue to find excuses, give up (again) and be unhappy and uncomfortable? Lemme know if you want a friend who will both hold your hand and kick your *kitten* until you reach your goal... you CAN do this... go ahead... JUST DECIDE.
gosh you are good LOL you should get into motivational speaking , you do it well
i wanted to leave my desk and go run
Celery and smoothies for everybody0
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