Why do people think it's ok...

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  • kellyg891
    kellyg891 Posts: 16
    To constantly and I mean CONSTANTLY criticize and/or comment on my food choices at work?

    Most of my co-workers know I'm trying to eat healthier and lose weight. The majority of them really could care less. But there is one guy who feels the need to constantly try to talk me in to "cheating just this once" or commenting on how awful or little or whatever my food/snacks are. I feel like I have to justify everything I'm eating. "Yes, I'm just having toast and water for breakfast." "No I'm not having a donut. Yes I know they're free but I'm still gonna pass."

    Anybody else deal with this?

    I think your title should have been written as Person and not "people" from only one guy. Maybe you should focus on the people who could care less instead of this one guy.. Why would you care what he thinks anyways? I think you just set your self up for this because you actually listen to this "one guy".. ohh I know its real rocket science here but how about you don't listen to this "one guy".. OP is trolling for sympathy you don't have to justify any thing to him duhh. This thread was ghey...:ohwell:

    Umm no actually I wasn't. This "one guy" happened to be the one to do it today. That doesn't mean others don't do it. And I wasn't looking for sympathy. I was looking for advice on how to deal with it. Clearly it's not an issue for you so I'm not really sure why you bothered to respond. Guess you don't have anything better to do. Bless your heart.
  • kellyg891
    kellyg891 Posts: 16
    This is so common. As other posters have said, I see it all the time on the forums.

    I don't know why people do it, but it does get annoying. I don't really care what people think of my food choices, but I do get ticked off when people start shoving their lifestyle and opinions at me. The condescending tone is just RUDE and disrespectful.

    Since those folks have declared that they don't respect me (through their nasty comments about what I eat or don't eat, how often I exercise, etc.), I see no reason to be respectful of them. If someone says, "You're not having a donut?" in that condescending tone, I look at them and say, "You ARE?". Truthfully, I couldn't give two you-know-what's about what they choose to eat or not eat, but when you turn the tables on people like that they tend to shut up real quick.

    ^^ This a GREAT idea! Thanks!
  • wolfehound22
    wolfehound22 Posts: 859 Member
    My two cents, people are jealous, and are generally unhappy with their appearance, but for whatever reason are too lazy to do something about. Then in comes you, with your salad, and weight loss, and they feel worse. So if they can somehow make you cheat, then maybe just maybe they won't feel so bad about themselves. Unfortunately they are only covering up there faults, and will never truly be happy unless those around them are also miserable.
  • AnninStPaul
    AnninStPaul Posts: 1,372 Member
    Would you be comfortable telling this individual that while you appreciate their concern for your well being and interest in your eating habits, you'd rather not discuss it with them? Or something else that is polite but firm?

    ^^THIS. And if he doesn't stop, you could progress to informing him that you are find his concern to be "harrassment", which your local HR team would frown upon.
  • DieVixen
    DieVixen Posts: 790 Member
    Why do people care so much what others say to them? other people dont have to live your life you do. stop caring and all you will hear is "blah blah blah"
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,641 Member
    I appreciate comments and criticism on my diary on here but in person I hate when people talk about my food choices in person. It just seems nosy and awkward. Its like...leave me alone and let me eat!
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I have a co-worker lecture me everytime I think about eating a cookie. Sure, he is trying to be supportive, but I wouldn't be eating it if it didn't fit my macros!! He knows nothing about what I have eaten or not eaten for the day.
  • 3beans3
    3beans3 Posts: 8
    Call me rude, but you have no obligation to answer his dumb questions. I work with a bunch of engineers who have NO social skills so I deal with this all the time. You can just say, "I'm sorry, did you have something work-related you needed help with" and completely ignore his personal questions.

    This same type of behavior comes from the same people when you're pregnant. WOW, YOU'RE GETTING HUGE. People just have no social graces. It helps to just keep these people at bay by insisting that you will only discuss WORK at WORK. Not your food choices, wardrobe or hairstyle.

    If that fails, you can google the horrible ingredients in donuts and the horrible effects it has on your body/health. Then start to lecture him...that will most likely keep him from talking to you about food again.
  • grayprae
    grayprae Posts: 109 Member
    I think that next time he says something make a comment to him about his choices and keep doing it he will get the hint. Like when he says the doughnuts are free say something like yeah but the calories are not. If they comment on your exercise say something like I would invite you to join me but I can see that you won't. I know my examples are kinda lame but my point is to turn the tables on them. They will learn to keep there mouth shuts. Good luck and keep up the good work
  • WickedGarden
    WickedGarden Posts: 944 Member
    because they have nothing else better to do.

    I generally don't tell people 'I'm on a diet'-once you do, others assume they are the 'food police' and tell you what you can/cannot have. It's none of their business what you eat/don't eat.

    Last place I worked at, they were ALWAYS having bagels, doughnuts, cake etc. Then they hired a lady who would bake every other day, and get all offended if you didn't eat whatever she made. Literally, she would walk around, and when she saw someone go into the breakroom, she'd follow them in there, "Did you try my cake/cookies/pie/tart/candy? You MUST have some!" then she'd cut a HUGE slice of whatever or load up a plate with her baked goods and shove it in your face.

    I tried saying, "No thank-you" or "I don't eat sweets" then she would get offended, "Everybody likes cake! Just a bite!" and shove a fork in my face. So, I just said, "Thanks for your concern, but I am going to make my food choices for myself"
  • SPNLuver83
    SPNLuver83 Posts: 2,050 Member
    To constantly and I mean CONSTANTLY criticize and/or comment on my food choices at work?

    Most of my co-workers know I'm trying to eat healthier and lose weight. The majority of them really could care less. But there is one guy who feels the need to constantly try to talk me in to "cheating just this once" or commenting on how awful or little or whatever my food/snacks are. I feel like I have to justify everything I'm eating. "Yes, I'm just having toast and water for breakfast." "No I'm not having a donut. Yes I know they're free but I'm still gonna pass."

    Anybody else deal with this?

    because it makes them feel better about their own choices.
  • Doozer1978
    Doozer1978 Posts: 61 Member
    I know exactly where you are coming from.

    I work with special needs kids - the ones who get thrown out of school (I love a challenge) and I have found a strategy that really works.....with the kids who misbehave and the bigger "kids" who try to get me to cheat.....

    Drop your tone of voice to one level (no expression in tone or facial expression).

    Say "no thank you I am sticking to my healthy eating plan".

    When they persist say exactly the same line again.....don't look at them and carry on with what you are doing.

    I have had to repeat myself three/four times with some colleagues but they soon get the hang of it. After a while a quick offer is made and a no thank you is good enough. It's almost as if some people need to be put in there place!!!!!

    They soon get it!
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