Is your family/relatives supportive of your weight loss?

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MoonIite
MoonIite Posts: 341 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I'm the only one in my family who exercise regularly and watch what I eat. My father and my two siblings are blessed with a high metabolism and do not have to workout to stay shapely. Whereas my mother and I have a slower metabolism and gain weight easily. In general, my family members are indifferent to my weight loss efforts. I would like to have their support, but I don’t want to bring unnecessary attention to myself. My relatives like to comment on my weight whenever they come over to visit and, more often than not, my weight ends up being the highlight of the conversation. Imagine greeting your relatives and the first words that come out of their mouth are, “Wow, you’re getting really fat.” Not “how are you?” Or “what have you been up to lately?.” Every time the conversation comes to a total standstill, the mere mention of my weight will resuscitate it back to life. I'm sure there are far better topics to talk about besides my WEIGHT. Sometimes I shake my head in dismay and wonder as to why they think it’s appropriate to talk about my weight, as if the only thing that matters in the world is how much I weigh. I used to let it get to me, but now I just laugh it off and remind myself that the only approval I need is my own.

Does anyone have a similar story to share?

Replies

  • Sakye
    Sakye Posts: 31 Member
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    My mother think I suffer from anorexia because I lost weight, even though I explained her how I managed to do so. She is not supportive at all lol. I think she should focus on something else, like my brother who still lives with her, weight 280 lbs for 5'10 at 19 years old and has cholesterol problems since he is 12...
  • ashlinmarie
    ashlinmarie Posts: 1,263 Member
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    I'm really sorry to hear about that! My family is supportive but my brother and husband have super high metabolisms, my mom lost 50 lbs a few years back and my dad doesn't care about his weight so I am the only one really watching my diet and exercising. My mom will go on a 10 mile walk like twice a week, but for the most part she eats whatever she wants and then starves herself for a few days if she goes up a few pounds. I want to be healthy, though and I'm hoping now that my husband is in the military, we can at least be active together even though he will still eat whatever.
  • silver_arrow3
    silver_arrow3 Posts: 1,373 Member
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    My mom's parents used to tell me that I was fat. And that nobody would ever love me if I was fat (Don't you want boys to like you?). I was 8. I didn't care about boys at 8. I sure has hell cared about how my grandparents thought of me though.

    When I was in high school I lost a bunch of weight and my grandmother (who had lost the majority of her hearing and would talk to people by literally yelling at the top of her lungs) would tell my mom I finally wasn't fat anymore. But then as soon as any of the weight came back I was fat again. Which led to emotional eating. Which led to more weight gain.

    My mother's parents have passed away now, but the rest of my family is very supportive. My mom got a membership to go to the gym with me some days. My other grandmother tells me how skinny I look (though her eyesight has gone downhill since she was declared legally blind ten years ago).
  • reenielovesthebeach
    reenielovesthebeach Posts: 98
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    My husband and I are losing weight together. I cook the meals so I almost feel a sense of guilt- not only for making myself heavy, but more importantly the person I love so much. I didn't force-feed him, but I should have been more responsible about what I was cooking. Now here we both are with high blood pressure and 60 extra pounds that neither of us need. I am one of those home cooked meal kinda gals. You name it and I used to cook it. All of my kids' friends used to love to come to our house to eat because they love my cooking. My kids are both at a decent weight, but that's how my hub and I used to be when we were their age. I tell my kids to be careful because the genetics are on both sides and weight could potentially creep up on them. I still cook. I just make healthy things. I made a huge batch of black bean/tomato salsa with extra tomatoes from my garden and it didn't last more than five hours last Sunday.
  • angimac
    angimac Posts: 145 Member
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    My husband and children and my closest friends are very supportive.

    My mother tells me that I have lost enough weight, I don't need to lose anymore. Even though I tell her my doctor wants me to lose at least 15 more pounds, to get to a healthy weight range. She finally snapped one day that she has been smaller than me since I was 15 years old and that I was just determined to make her be bigger than me. Because everything in life is always all about her. :huh:

    Now, she introduces me to everyone - "This is my daughter. She weighed 300 pounds a year ago" :grumble:

    Nice to know that I am defined by my weight loss. :indifferent:
  • Stormyyy
    Stormyyy Posts: 247 Member
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    My Family don't talk about my weight loss much anymore but have said i have been looking really good these days which makes me feel good as in my Family my weight was at one point a group discussion about how thin i was when i was slightly over weight by Doctors standards but as the females in my Family are pretty big it was a focal point. Then i gradually put on nearly 3 stone and even the Men in my Family were forever raving about how i was so fat i couldn't get up off the sofa. And now? They see for themselves i'm comfortable in my own skin they wouldn't dare say anymore than a quick passing comment and this is just exactly the way i like it.....The way i see it is if they have nothing nice to say then best not say anything at all and what i have learned? If they do say something i'm ready with my answer knowing i'm fit and healthy and will not stand for people putting me down .

    Tell your Family how this talk of weight loss makes you feel , explain how uncomfortable you feel about them discussing your weight. We can't change other people but when we change our response to other peoples comments i have noticed they change in the way they speak when they know our responses only make us feel even better about ourselves! :)

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