Not sure if I'm ready

willtry08
willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Honestly I'm not sure if I'm ready to lose weight. I found this site today and thought it wouldn't hurt to give it a try since I have a rather significant amount of weight to lose. I guess any amount is significant, really. I'm not sure if I'm ready to lose it though - I feel like I should learn to love and appreciate my body the way it is before I change it. Otherwise I think I run the risk of not liking it much even after the weight is gone. What if, at that point, I just find something else about it to change/dislike?

My strategy - such as it is - is to try and get healthy and focus on that and less on the weight loss. Here's to hoping that the one naturally leads to the other.

My best wishes for success to you all.
xo
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Replies

  • Ltrautman80
    Ltrautman80 Posts: 47 Member
    That's a great set of mind to start off. I myself started with 125lbs to lose and am down 27lbs. Start out slow. Start out learning how to track your food and reading lables, if you don't already. Then make healthier choices when it comes to eating. Thn gradually start exercising, but ease into it. You can add me for support if you want it.:smile:
  • knightreader
    knightreader Posts: 813 Member
    you will know when you are ready. when i tried to get healthier and wasn't ready, i failed. that is my biggest difference this time around, and a key to my 65 pound weight loss since january... i was ready. you will know when you are ready. i can't explain how i knew, i just knew.

    good luck!
  • debjae
    debjae Posts: 242
    Good luck to you!!
  • selig0730
    selig0730 Posts: 509 Member
    i was on MFP for a year before i was really decated and losing weight...just start logging in and dont go over your calories and you will start losing some and before you know it you will be ready...btw you can add me if you want.
  • fayefern
    fayefern Posts: 57 Member
    thats the strategy my daughter has- to not focus on weight loss, just focusing on getting healthy and guess what....she lost 10 lbs since Aug. 8!!! Im so proud of her! once she saw the loss, then her motivation and determination increased. We are doing this together, if you can find someone to do it with you i think that helps in motivating each other.
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    That's a great set of mind to start off. I myself started with 125lbs to lose and am down 27lbs. Start out slow. Start out learning how to track your food and reading lables, if you don't already. Then make healthier choices when it comes to eating. Thn gradually start exercising, but ease into it. You can add me for support if you want it.:smile:

    Thanks for the support, I appreciate it. As soon as I figure out how to use this site properly, I'll be adding you for sure :)
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    you will know when you are ready. when i tried to get healthier and wasn't ready, i failed. that is my biggest difference this time around, and a key to my 65 pound weight loss since january... i was ready. you will know when you are ready. i can't explain how i knew, i just knew.

    good luck!

    That's what I'm hoping for, a kind of *knowing*. That's how I was able to quit smoking after many many many failed attempts. One day, I just *knew* I was done with it and I haven't smoked since. That was years ago. I also found a very supportive forum when I quit smoking. Maybe by finding this forum I can repeat the same success with weight loss as I did with kicking the smoking habit. Anyway, thanks for your words.
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    Good luck to you!!

    Thank you! Best of luck to you as well.
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    i was on MFP for a year before i was really decated and losing weight...just start logging in and dont go over your calories and you will start losing some and before you know it you will be ready...btw you can add me if you want.

    Thank you, I'll be adding you as soon as I figure out how :)
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    thats the strategy my daughter has- to not focus on weight loss, just focusing on getting healthy and guess what....she lost 10 lbs since Aug. 8!!! Im so proud of her! once she saw the loss, then her motivation and determination increased. We are doing this together, if you can find someone to do it with you i think that helps in motivating each other.

    I hope that strategy works for me as well. I guess time will tell! Take care.
  • sarahsummers12
    sarahsummers12 Posts: 128 Member
    As others have said - you will know... I have tried a few times to lose the weight but never was serious enough to actually make myself accountable and stick to it. This time though I KNOW I will do it cos I am at the point where I HAVE to do it for me.... but certainly aiming for a healthy lifestyle is an awesome start - and if you focus more on just being healthy rather than actual weight loss you put less pressure on yourself, which means you won't be disappointed and beat yourself up too much.. just enjoy eating good healthy food and feeling better! Best of luck to you! Feel free to add me as a friend :-)
  • kimothy38
    kimothy38 Posts: 840 Member
    My focus is on health and wellbeing, weight loss is a bonus. You definitely need to be mentally at the point that you're ready to change otherwise you'll just go through the motions, get bored and give up. I started with exercise that I enjoy doing (circuit, weights, walking) and as my self esteem improved I started focussing on eating foods that made me feel good (fruit, veges, protein, carbs 80% of the time). The sense of achievement I feel filters through to all aspects of my life and I'm much happier for it. Make small changes and you're more likely to stick at it. Good luck.
  • kimosabe1
    kimosabe1 Posts: 2,467 Member
    One thing is certain: You are unhappy with your body or you would have never visited this site. Obesity causes health problems. My obesity has me on cholesterol medication, blood pressure medication and an antidepressant because I'm depressed about being a fat-*kitten*.... You can get your stuff together or die from a heart attack or stroke because being fat can cause both.....my doc said the exact same thing....I can see a form of motivation from your post. Make the smart choice!
  • smhaze77
    smhaze77 Posts: 52 Member
    I agree with everyone has said so far, when you are ready you just kind of know, it becomes your main focus to get healthier and lose the weight. One thing I found was really helpful to me is to not think of it as a diet, diet to me means short term and deprivation. Instead I see it as a lifestyle change. I try to make better choices than I have in the past and do my best not to beat myself up to much if I have an off day. Most importantly if I'm hungry I eat, I love food too much. If/when you decide you are ready feel free to add me if you want :) Good luck with whatever you decide.
  • Jess4kids
    Jess4kids Posts: 27 Member
    So today is a new day for me. I am going to start tracking what I'm eating because I heard that is the only reason stopping me from losing weight. I need some motivation!!!!
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    One thing is certain: You are unhappy with your body or you would have never visited this site. Obesity causes health problems. My obesity has me on cholesterol medication, blood pressure medication and an antidepressant because I'm depressed about being a fat-*kitten*.... You can get your stuff together or die from a heart attack or stroke because being fat can cause both.....my doc said the exact same thing....I can see a form of motivation from your post. Make the smart choice!

    Honestly, being unhappy with how my body is now is the reason I think I may fail at this! It's kinda tricky to explain but the best way I can make sense of it is that I personally don't believe it's possible to make good decisions from a "bad-feeling" place. Know what I mean? Like, I think I'd be more successful if I can first get to a place where I'm choosing to lose weight because of how I want to feel not because I want to avoid feeling a certain way. I'm pretty sure I'm not explaining myself well! My mind works in confusing ways, lol.

    I guess I just want to feel good about my body first so that I can create more good feelings about it instead of feeling bad first and coming from a place of unhappiness about my body. By the way, calling yourself a fat-*kitten* sounds mean - I hope you're being kind to yourself...
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    As others have said - you will know... I have tried a few times to lose the weight but never was serious enough to actually make myself accountable and stick to it. This time though I KNOW I will do it cos I am at the point where I HAVE to do it for me.... but certainly aiming for a healthy lifestyle is an awesome start - and if you focus more on just being healthy rather than actual weight loss you put less pressure on yourself, which means you won't be disappointed and beat yourself up too much.. just enjoy eating good healthy food and feeling better! Best of luck to you! Feel free to add me as a friend :-)

    Thanks for the support! Consider yourself added :) Take care.
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    My focus is on health and wellbeing, weight loss is a bonus. You definitely need to be mentally at the point that you're ready to change otherwise you'll just go through the motions, get bored and give up. I started with exercise that I enjoy doing (circuit, weights, walking) and as my self esteem improved I started focussing on eating foods that made me feel good (fruit, veges, protein, carbs 80% of the time). The sense of achievement I feel filters through to all aspects of my life and I'm much happier for it. Make small changes and you're more likely to stick at it. Good luck.

    This sounds like good advice, thank you. I hope my self-esteem improves in time too. To meet me you wouldn't know that I struggle with feelings of low self-esteem (I hide it well) but I second guess just about every decision I make - not confident at all!. I hope that by achieving some measure of success with weight loss I can feel more certain about myself, more confident. Take care!
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    I agree with everyone has said so far, when you are ready you just kind of know, it becomes your main focus to get healthier and lose the weight. One thing I found was really helpful to me is to not think of it as a diet, diet to me means short term and deprivation. Instead I see it as a lifestyle change. I try to make better choices than I have in the past and do my best not to beat myself up to much if I have an off day. Most importantly if I'm hungry I eat, I love food too much. If/when you decide you are ready feel free to add me if you want :) Good luck with whatever you decide.

    You're right, I need to get that diet word out of my head. Thanks for the support and congrats on your weight loss to date!
  • slamkajs
    slamkajs Posts: 7
    I am not sure waiting to love your body with "a significant amount of weight to lose" is a good idea. I understand your fear that you may lose weight and then find other things to be unhappy about physically. Keep in mind, if you want to lose weight and that's a goal you're going to love seeing the person that sheds all that weight. Youwill not only feel more confident about your looks but, you'll also come across as more confident in other aspects of your life.

    Whatever you choose, good luck with your future endeavors!
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    So today is a new day for me. I am going to start tracking what I'm eating because I heard that is the only reason stopping me from losing weight. I need some motivation!!!!

    Good luck! You can do it!
  • willtry08
    willtry08 Posts: 74 Member
    I am not sure waiting to love your body with "a significant amount of weight to lose" is a good idea. I understand your fear that you may lose weight and then find other things to be unhappy about physically. Keep in mind, if you want to lose weight and that's a goal you're going to love seeing the person that sheds all that weight. Youwill not only feel more confident about your looks but, you'll also come across as more confident in other aspects of your life.

    Whatever you choose, good luck with your future endeavors!

    You've made some valid points, thank you for taking the time to post.
  • Monie0986
    Monie0986 Posts: 3 Member
    The one thing that really helped me commit this time around is I found a reason other than looks or losing weight to get fit. My younger sister who was only 19 at the time was told that she was pre-diabetic, and we were both in the same weight range. This really freaked me out! I have worked in nursing homes and have other family members with diabetes so I know first hand how diabetes can affect you later in life. This became my reason to get fit, for my health and not to fit into a size 8 or 6! In the past I had wanted to lose wieght so that I could "love myself and my body" but this was something that I wasn't committed to because it was way too easy to give up on myself. I have lost 40 lbs in the last 9 months, but my whole weight loss journey has taken TWO years! I had joined weight watchers and lost some weight and gained and not until I found a true motivating factor and accountability was I able to lose the weight.

    If you feel you are not ready start small. Tracking your food is a great way to start! Don't give up, don't be too hard on yourself, find someone to keep you accountable. If you feel that you made a bad food choice for one meal, forgive yourself and make your next meal a healthy choice. One thing that has helped me avoid cravings is telling myself that I can have it later. Later usually meant the next day or not even at all once the craving went away! Most importantly, get started! Any step towards your goal is better than no step! Good luck, I know you can do it!
  • snookumss
    snookumss Posts: 1,451 Member
    Seriously, learning to love your body comes as you learn to lose the weight and take care of it better. It comes hand in hand. I never had any appreciation for my body until I started losing the weight and it helped me be so much more proud and confident. I would never have been as happy with myself and my body as I became through my weight loss journey. I fell off the wagon and gained ten pounds back and realized I missed my confidence. Stick it out, learn about the crazy weight loss information and don't give yourself excuses!!!
  • Bellacuore
    Bellacuore Posts: 10 Member
    Posting here shows that at least a part of you wants a change when it comes to your body/health and that's a great thing! Now for the next step...what you said is SO spot on: you need to love you now because you won't magically start loving yourself at a size 2. I wish there was a magic pill for that; however the same demons that haunted me 107 pounds ago still haunt me now and there's even some new ones that have joined the circus. =)
    Start nourishing your soul because you are amazing right now, in the skin you live in. :flowerforyou:
  • Ksand23
    Ksand23 Posts: 2
    I am new to this site, but I love it. Dont think of it as a diet but a learning experience. The phone app is great and it has a very extensive food lookup. It has been a real eye opener to see the amount of calories I was taking in every day. No wonder!! I am not hitting my goal every day, but i am learning. Making small changes can really make a difference and the information will help you. I have learned leaving off a few things like no mayo or leave off the cheese. The add on calories can really add up. Start with just educating yourself and tracking what you do.

    And let me speak to the loving your body issue. I love who I am as a person. Overweight or not. That is exactly WHY I am doing this. Love yourself enough to do this for you! Dont focus on loving your body, but loving your whole self. I recently posted that "I deserve more than a plate of empty calories". We have somehow convinced ourselves that giving up our comfort food is depriving ourselves. I think we have it backwards. We have been depriving ourselves or a healthy life, having more energy, living without BP meds, playing without always being winded. Love yourself enough to do this! Start slow. Its like starting a new relationship with yourself. Best of luck to you! We can do this! We deserve it!
  • Ksand23
    Ksand23 Posts: 2
    I love this site. And all the post are so encouraging. So glad i found this. :happy:
  • kimosabe1
    kimosabe1 Posts: 2,467 Member
    lol....U know...I started being kind to myself after the scale in my bathroom said I lost one pound. This site has actually kept me going on being motivated to drop further pounds. I have the feeling you will be back. This site has given me motivation and determination to drop more, and I'm only in the beginning stage.
  • LyssaJ1
    LyssaJ1 Posts: 240 Member
    That's a great set of mind to start off. I myself started with 125lbs to lose and am down 27lbs. Start out slow. Start out learning how to track your food and reading lables, if you don't already. Then make healthier choices when it comes to eating. Thn gradually start exercising, but ease into it. You can add me for support if you want it.:smile:

    Thanks for the support, I appreciate it. As soon as I figure out how to use this site properly, I'll be adding you for sure :)

    Welcome to MFP! I understand your perspective and agree with most of what everyone posted :smile:

    As to "How to Add Friends"....click on their profile photo, it will automatically go to their page/screen which says "Send Message" or "Add as Friend" Choose the friend option.

    Good luck on your journey! :smile:
  • Factory_Reset
    Factory_Reset Posts: 1,651 Member
    Hi, your post just made me miss my own mom sooo much. The way you spoke of your daughter, just made me remember how she was with me. Keep encouraging her in any way....I can honestly tell you having a close relationship with my mom was one of the best things. I know this has nothing to do with the original post, but I felt the need to say you're doing a good job with your daughter!

    *I didn't see the quote button so this was ment to the women speaking of her daughter*

    As for the original post, you will know when you're ready. Baby steps are just fine. My husband tells me all the time "the big changes or the best changes can't happen in a day, so have some patience!" I get bored/frustrated if I don't see results. Started back to just checking what I'm eating and measuring it and it makes me feel like I have some control. The rest will follow.

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