Just don't want to go through the effort anymore

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer
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Replies

  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    you can add me as a friend if you want...I've got a little merry band of followers who keep each other in check and know when to give a good swift kick in the @$$...and we have started a weekly /daily challenge...we are having a BLAST!
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    I know how you feel :( And Lyssa - that sounds awesome! I've been looking for a support and motivational system/group...don't have one out here where I'm at :(
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    No one can carry you through this except YOU. You have to want it and commit to it. That said, I've built up an amazing network of support here by way of my MFPals. They are in all stages of life, weight loss, and fitness levels, but they are all fun and supportive, and have made all the difference to me!

    I never set a time limit to reach any goals. I knew going in that it wasn't going to be fast or easy. But I look back now, many months later, and I couldn't be happier that I stuck it out. Christmas, summer, your birthday, whatever arbitrary date you want to throw out, will come and go whether you do this or not. You can either be fitter, healthier and happier when it gets here, or not. Your choice :smile:
  • i know exactly how you feel, i log on everyday because it dose help to keep track of the calories you take in. when i joined mfp i was very depressed because i had been dieting since january and each month i'd weigh myself i hadn't lost a pound! one day a friend and i were hanging out when he looked at me and said how many of those do you drink a day, i responded 3 he replied are you counting the calories in those sodasi said no ah that's your problem! 1 20oz pepsi has 250 calories that's 750 calories you take in everyday! it was an eye opener i must say i was surprise that at my age i didn't already know this, since then i've switched to diet and added more water to my daily intake i'v lost 30lbs and i feel good about myself and i can see the difference when i look in the mirror! it is very hard to see family and friends eating what they want when they want it, while i have to watch every little thing that i put in my mouth it sucks sometimes but i am not giving up i can do this and so can you stay strong!
  • aww... don't give up... sometimes you fall off the bandwagon but you just need to pick yourself up and dust yourself off and keep going. everyone has good days and bad days... just keep moving forward. the first step back on the bandwagon is so UNBELIVABLY HARD but i GUARANTEE that you will feel amazing after. i just switched my bootcamp classes from 6pm to 6am and let me tell you, i'm in such a cranky mood when i wake up, but after class, i feel like a million bucks - EVERY SINGLE TIME. Yet, I have to convince myself to get out of bed and get going every single morning. so strange.

    anyways, what's that quote... something about a journey of a thousand miles begins with one single step. I bet you're also an inspiration to those around you.... so jump back on the bandwagon!
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

    I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

    Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

    I have several thoughts. Some of them conflict with each other so you can do what you want with this feedback. I'm blunt:

    1) If the issue is satiety then you probably need to look at how big of a deficit you're creating and take a closer look at food selection.

    2) If you don't enjoy your exercise program you should experiment to see if there's something else (gym related exercise) that you would enjoy more.

    But also

    3) Suck it up. I guarantee you, you don't want it as bad as I do. I really am not trying to hurt your feelings when I say that, but at some point, after you've looked at legitimate possible causes for your failures, you also have to look at the fact that you might just not care as much as you think you do.
  • Nerdy_Rose
    Nerdy_Rose Posts: 1,277 Member
    This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

    I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

    Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

    I have several thoughts. Some of them conflict with each other so you can do what you want with this feedback. I'm blunt:

    1) If the issue is satiety then you probably need to look at how big of a deficit you're creating and take a closer look at food selection.

    2) If you don't enjoy your exercise program you should experiment to see if there's something else (gym related exercise) that you would enjoy more.

    But also

    3) Suck it up. I guarantee you, you don't want it as bad as I do. I really am not trying to hurt your feelings when I say that, but at some point, after you've looked at legitimate possible causes for your failures, you also have to look at the fact that you might just not care as much as you think you do.

    Yup. A very wise man once told me "Suck it up, princess." Best advice I ever got in my whole life.
  • californiagirl2012
    californiagirl2012 Posts: 2,625 Member
    Sometimes it's okay to just take a break from the deficit and eat at maintenance. You don't have to backslide, just maintain. I think it's a good strategy and it is something I do at times.

    Also, make sure you are not falling into a trap of some of the diets out there "good food" vs "bad food". That mentality is exactly why diets fail. You drive yourself insane by denying yourself things you love. Eat what you like but try to remain within your calorie budget. We all know what healthy food is, we don't need the good food bad food mantra. It's like a financial budget. It's okay to just pay your bills and not put anything into savings, but try not to get deeper into debt. When you are overweight you simply have a mortgage to pay. Someday when the debt is paid you will have more calories to spend, but the calories even then are only maintenance calories because you don't want to go into debt again. So just pay your bills for awhile and relax.
  • mermx
    mermx Posts: 976
    Hey Deanna, I am going to put a whole different spin on things for you!!!

    This is because I care about you doing well in your life.

    I read your profile and see that Jesus is a big part of your life, would you give up on him? Is he gonna give up on you?

    Of course not, then, come on girlie...you have so much more to give, put the effort in for the reasons I have said, but most of all for you and your family!!!
  • Skeebee
    Skeebee Posts: 740 Member
    Yup. A very wise man once told me "Suck it up, princess." Best advice I ever got in my whole life.

    Have to agree. Not to sound cruel, but the only person who can keep you motivated and dedicated is you. I spent way to many years trying to get help, spending on things I thought I needed, relying on opinions and research. Doesn't mean anything unless YOU are ready to make a change. I finally just did a mental "walkabout" and it took me years before finally deciding I was ready to do this. I was up and down. Lost 40lbs, gained 50 back, lost 20, gained back 20....I couldn't stay motivated. I even DNF'd at a half marathon I was going to walk because I just didn't train. I thought forcing myself into something to show my husband I could do this. But, I was doing it for the wrong reasons and failed. Finally, this past year, I realized who I was doing things for and just had to test myself mentally. And, it's finally working...because I want to do this now and stay motivated. It's like a treadmill; just got to keep adjusting the speed until you figure which setting you can stick with. Best of luck to you!
  • danne32339
    danne32339 Posts: 155 Member
    Hey there,
    I am so sorry your're have a tough time. Have you talked to your doc about lack of energy and feeling down? The reason I ask is because I suffer from depression and I have those same symptoms at times. Not all of the time thank goodness. Just a thought. Feel free to add me to your friend list.
    Good luck and God bless,
    Doni
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    Quit. Or suck it up. Those are your options.
  • the doctor told me lose weight or die so ive kept my dairy 115 days in a row and have lost 36 lbs but mor eimportantly my ac1 level has gone from a dangerous 11.1 to a great 6.2- it all depends on the seriousness of the consequences of the extra pounds
  • mermx
    mermx Posts: 976
    the doctor told me lose weight or die so ive kept my dairy 115 days in a row and have lost 36 lbs but mor eimportantly my ac1 level has gone from a dangerous 11.1 to a great 6.2- it all depends on the seriousness of the consequences of the extra pounds

    Kudos to you for taking your health seriously!!!
  • Sixalicious
    Sixalicious Posts: 283 Member
    Weight loss is a slow and tedious process. It is very hard starting out so the one thing you have to remember is that patience and commitment is key to success. You have to mentally prepare your mind for all that is to come before your body will fully cooperate. Hang in there. Take things one day at a time. Set low expectations before high ones to get you started. Sometimes, people jump in feet first without realizing that they should have dipped their toes in one at a time. Try to find one thing in your diet that is unhealthy and replace it with something healthy instead of doing mass eliminations as a whole. Take a five minute walk today and add one minute tomorrow. Take baby steps first. As the saying goes, you have to crawl before you walk. That holds true with weight loss. Good luck!
  • pholbert
    pholbert Posts: 575 Member
    Yes it just depends how much you want this. I have been up and down n weight a few times. As I am getting older I want to stop yo-yoing. I will tell you this site has really helped me take control and that is a great feeling.
  • NCchar130
    NCchar130 Posts: 955 Member


    Yup. A very wise man once told me "Suck it up, princess." Best advice I ever got in my whole life.

    LOL, I tell myself this almost every day!
  • mom2handh1975
    mom2handh1975 Posts: 224 Member
    My goal is always 10 pounds. I can do 10 pounds. My ultimate goal (which is still above what is considered healthy) is 170-180 pounds. So, at the beginning of this journey I decided not to look at it as "80 pounds". That sounds impossible and makes me want to quit. Ten pounds is attainable. I've reached that goal once already, and I'm well on the way to reaching it a second time. I don't love to exercise. I hate being sweaty, and today is one of those days that I KNOW I have to work out but I really don't want to. Here's the thing... getting started is the hard part. Just start something and tell yourself you'll do it for 5-10 minutes. Then tell yourself you'll do another 10 minutes. Keep doing it. When you're done, you'll feel awesome and know that you did something great for your body. Don't give up on yourself.
  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
    Stop "LOATHING" your body.

    You have to love your body to realise that it deserves to be treated well. I can see by your profile that you believe in God perhaps if you look at it in this way it may help.

    God gave you that body to take you through your life, you are the custodian of the body he gave you so you should be taking care of it, for him. ( Forgive me if I am overstepping any boundaries here) but you are asking for motivation so may be your faith could be that motivation.

    It is hard and it does take work, it has taken me over a year to lose 38 pounds and get fitter but it really is worth the effort. I look at one pound at a time that is all, just one pound and if it takes me a few weeks to lose it so be it, but that one pound WILL come off my ticker.

    I really hope you can find the motivation to continue on your journey to a healthy fitter you. :flowerforyou:
  • AthenaArcher
    AthenaArcher Posts: 41 Member
    Welcome back to mfp the fact that you are here and posting means that you really want to be here.Every time you need motivation look at your kids.Now imagination them 20 pounds heavier, now think of how they are going to be with out you in there life because you are to sick to get out of bed. Because you "just don't want to go through the effort anymore" now one last thing if any of your kids told you that they were not going to eat well and just sit on the couch all day what would you tell them?

    workout with your kids
    Swimming
    ride a bicycle
    go roller skating
    go hiking
    play ball
    go to the park and just play you and your kids are worth it! :happy:
  • Restybaby2012
    Restybaby2012 Posts: 568 Member
    This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

    I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

    Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

    Add me Deanna.........we can support and uplift one another. I kinda feel like you do right now. Ive lost 50 + pounds in 60 days so I cant claim no loss as an excuse. Deflated is a good term. I hurt my back a lil last week working out and lifting weights and its been hard to get back to it. I KNOW I Have to......I have the proverbial cushy desk job and dont get out much. I also suffer extreme chronic pain daily which makes it paramount that I DO workout and DO lose this excess weight....and there's a lot of it to lose.

    Sometimes the last few days I have this feeling that I just dont wanna. I seem to have this bullsh!t idea that the weight will magically what..............just drop off or something. >>>here's me wacking myself side the head<<

    I dont claim to know everything or anything really. I do seem to have found the niche that works for me here and that's all I have to go by. But I can promise to be supportive and give ya kick in the butt when ya need an uplifting, and a shoulder to lean on with an ear to listen when ya need that.

    COMEON NOW!!!! We CAN do this
  • Two things, don't look at it as a diet instead think of your change as a new lifetime change. Create small reachable goals for yourself. Weight in only once a week but exercise everyday even if it's only taking a walk. Find a friend or a family member to take walks with you. If you don't have anyone to take walks with, use an IPOD and listen to your favorite music. You are not the first to have bad days or weeks, the important thing is you are Back!!! Please stay with it. Each day you stay with your program is another day you add to your life.
  • newmein2013
    newmein2013 Posts: 674 Member
    SideSteel's right. you have to want to change as much as you want to live. it's a learning process & you need to make small chages slowly over time. make a plan and stick to it. don't think about it, just do it. get in the habit of searching through the threads on here. some are very imformative. build up your friends list with quality friends. if you're mentallyready to change your life, nothing cwill prevent you.
  • Ichristini
    Ichristini Posts: 66 Member
    I know how you feel. There are several days I skip logging because I know I won't like what I see. There are a lot of days where I do NOT want to get up and exercise. Many times I am on my treadmill repeating to myself, "I don't want to dothis" on those days I tend to only get in 25-30 minutes instead of my goal of 45-60 minutes.

    All that being said, there is NOTHING I want more than to lose all of this weight I have gained. On the days I skip logging, I've still totaled it up in my head and know the number I don't want to see in Black and White on MFP.

    I have tried a few times in the last few years to start and be successful on my journey to weight loss. It didn't click for me before. This time it has clicked. There is NOTHING more important to me than losing weight and getting down to the weight I was when I got married.

    You have to make it happen for yourself. Think about what your motivation is. Why do you want to lose weight, what is it worth to you.

    I hope you are able to find your motivation. It isn't easy, but its worth it! Good Luck!

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  • TimeFourMe
    TimeFourMe Posts: 104 Member
    [/quote]
    Also, make sure you are not falling into a trap of some of the diets out there "good food" vs "bad food". That mentality is exactly why diets fail. You drive yourself insane by denying yourself things you love. Eat what you like but try to remain within your calorie budget. We all know what healthy food is, we don't need the good food bad food mantra. It's like a financial budget. It's okay to just pay your bills and not put anything into savings, but try not to get deeper into debt. When you are overweight you simply have a mortgage to pay. Someday when the debt is paid you will have more calories to spend, but the calories even then are only maintenance calories because you don't want to go into debt again. So just pay your bills for awhile and relax.
    [/quote]

    Excellent illustration!
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    I know how you feel :( And Lyssa - that sounds awesome! I've been looking for a support and motivational system/group...don't have one out here where I'm at :(

    feel free to add me ..and we'll be starting our Manic Monday challenge tomorrow :)
  • Rinkermann
    Rinkermann Posts: 108 Member
    get busy losing fat, or get busy being fat!

    yes, we all know it's tough but it does get easier. exercising is the way to go, but if you're finding it tough just keep eating at a deficit. even if it's only a 200 calories deficit. as you lose more weight, exercise will become easier and you may even start to enjoy it.

    exercise doesn't have to be an intense gym session, either. i started out just listening to the radio whilst taking a walk.
  • dargriff60
    dargriff60 Posts: 8 Member
    Like anything in life, if it takes effort it usually is worth it. You get back what you put in. Don't just talk about the problem, find a solution that works for you. If you don't you will be so sorry later on.
  • Tdk4685
    Tdk4685 Posts: 293 Member
    The beginning is hard, with the exercise and keeping track of your calories. But stick it out, it is worth it. Before you know it exercies will get easier and you will be able to burn more calories than before. Also, if you stick with the logging it will just become a habit. Dont give up you will be glad you stuck with it.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    Try doing a little mindfulness--non-judgmental awareness of your thoughts and feelings, observing and describing but not assigning good or bad. Spend a little time reflecting on how you are doing and give yourself compassion--not indulgence.