Just don't want to go through the effort anymore

Also, great advice I got from a friend here when I was in a "Don't give a darn" phase: What are all the things you did do right today? All of a sudden, it doesn't seem so overwhelming to just do a little better.

Firstly, well done on your weight loss so far! Keep remembering you are already 6lbs lighter than when you started - that is almost the weight of an average sized baby.

Motivation can be so hard to find, not to mention the time and energy when you have (4) children. I only have 1 and some days I just feel relieved to have survived! As a mum it can also feel focusing on our own needs for a change (or maybe that's just me!).

Have you written a list of things that motivated you when you first started?

You say you hate this, and are finding it hard. It will take some effort, but I wonder if you could find ways of making it more enjoyable? To make this work for me, I have had to find ways of ensuring I don't feel hungry, DO still love my meals (if anything, I enjoy them more now), don't have to spend a lot of extra time on it (i.e. the family still all have the same meals), and found exercise I both enjoy and can fit around an unpredictable schedule. Oh, and I am almost never under goal (1,220 cals) but have given myself a "calorie banding" so anything up to about 1,600 is OK.

Now I am motivated by mini-goals (for me 7lb increments, which in the UK has a significance as we work in "stones" = 14lbs), by seeing the scales moving and my measurements decreasing and my clothes getting baggier.

I have no idea if this is helpful, but thought I'd share a bit about what I am doing. Feel free to add me as a friend. Good luck!

Here are a couple suggestions that help me. I will sleep in my workout clothes so I'm ready first thing in the morning. Work out first thing, before the day gets in the way. Do 5 minutes. If that's all you squeeze in, it's a start. Many times, I'll do the 5 and want to continue. Make it less painful. If you're running on a treadmill or elliptical, watch a new movie you've been wanting to see. Only watch it while working out, or listen to a book on tape, only while working out. I've run many an extra mile to hear the end of the chapter. As to eating better, go to the store and pick some things you've always wanted to try, or already prepared so there are no hassles or excuses. There are a lot of really tasty options in the health freezer section that will work calorie wise. It takes the pressure off, gets a week of premade meals, is quick and convenient. No, you probably won't always be able to do this, but it will get you started. Make a list of all the reasons you want to lose. Great vaca pics, health, kids, sexy clothes, high school reunion, whatever works for you. Put it on the fridge next to a fat and a skinny picture of yourself. Stay connected. There are going to be highs and lows. Good days and bad. Friends make it so much easier. You're not alone in this. I haven't lost a pound in months, but I am stronger, I can run longer and faster, my legs are more toned, my arms wiggle less, there's muscle definition... the scale is only one indicator of your progress. Good luck!

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

I'm not even going to join your pity party. You simply don't want it bad enough. Either you want to do this or you dont. I hope you find that AHA moment or that spark soon because looking for others to push you will only get you but so far. YOU need to push yourself above all else. Good luck.

There are people that kill themselves because they can't manage to lose. You think they didn't want it badly enough? Kind of a jerk thing to say. Everyone is different.

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

Well, let's break it all down logically. You're goal is to lose a total of 50 pounds. You've already lost more than 10% of that in about a month. If you continue to lose 6 pounds a month, you'd reach your goal in less than 8 months. Where do you want to be in May? At your goal weight, or in the same place you are now?

As it sits now, you have 44 pounds to lose. That's not THAT much. Make sure your activity level is accurate (I really don't believe people are as "sedentary" as they think they are), set your goal to lose one pound a week, and eat back most of your exercise calories. Alternately, check with one of the groups like "In Place of a Road Map" ( http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/8017-in-place-of-a-road-map ) and find out your TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) and eat 20% less than that. You shouldn't feel deprived, hungry or miserable. If you are, something's wrong... either your calorie goal is too low, or you're not getting the right nutrients.

Set some goals that have nothing to do with the scale, but will improve your overall health and fitness. For me, when I started here, I wanted to be able to run a 5k. So I started the Couch to 5k running plan, and after a few weeks, I was able to run one mile. I'd NEVER been able to run a mile before! So even when my clothes still fit the same and I wasn't seeing major drops on the scale, I knew I was doing good things for my body. That kept me excited.

You have to want it. I'm surprised how long I've stuck with this. I only wanted to lose 20 pounds (started in January) and I met my goal in I think April... and I've stuck with it since then. I've maintained, kept working out, trying to work more on building muscle, etc etc. I love how dedicated I am. I'm dedicated because I WANT it. I want to be fit. i want to look good. I want to be healthy.

. . . Christmas, summer, your birthday, whatever arbitrary date you want to throw out, will come and go whether you do this or not. You can either be fitter, healthier and happier when it gets here, or not. Your choice

I totally love this statement. It really makes me think about the fact that time will pass anyway, might as well TRY to be fit. I am going through some of the same thing. Stuck in a plateau for a year. Add me as a friend if you like and we can commiserate.