the worst thing ever said.

You were yelling and screaming at him for shredding bills, something most people do (shred bills, that is). He had no way of knowing you might need them for an application today, so I don't blame him for getting defensive and yelling right back. I probably would have thought you were completely psycho if you'd come at me like that.

Was what he said mean? Yes, of course, but I can understand why he said it. He probably felt attacked and hurt, the same way you do now. People say stupid crap when they argue. You should hear some of the nonsense my boyfriend and I hurl at each other sometimes, only to wake up and say, "OMG, did I really say that to you? I'm so sorry."

Have you made a resolution to lose weight, many times, that he's probably heard over and over? I know I told my boyfriend I was "trying" for two solid years, even walking and such now and again, and he probably had a mental "okay... yeah... sure..." response every time I talked about it. I wouldn't have blamed him for hurling that at me if I came at him like a banshee one night.

It was a comment like your boyfriend's that helped me reach my turning point, though, so maybe it will work that way for you. My boyfriend was telling me a story about some big guy at work, and when he described him, he said, "He's like this big Santa guy. He's bigger than YOU." I was shocked, hurt, and sad. He realized what he'd said right away and apologized, but it had already been said. That's when I started losing weight.

Do it for you, first and foremost, but also think about how smug you'll get to be when you hit your goal weight and prove him wrong.

I hope you feel better soon. I really do think it was just a stupid argument. Give him time to cool down, give YOURSELF time to cool down, and talk about it. Don't pass blame or judgment. Just talk about how you feel. Use a lot of "I" statements instead of "you" statements.

My husband has been so supportive of me, while I've yo-yo'd up and down 60-100 lbs several times during our 15 years together. But no matter how supportive he is, I can tell that he just has no clue about my struggles. He has no problem with his weight, and no issues with food. He listens when I cry on his shoulder, and he pays for my gym memberships and in the past, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, etc. But he kind of has this blank look on his face that tells me that he just doesn't "get" it. Sounds like your guy might have a similar issue. He probably doesn't understand that this is so much more than just going to the gym or eating better food. I would cut him some slack if that's true, but don't ignore the comment. You'll resent him for this, even after you prove him wrong. I personally say, talk to him. Tell him you understand that in the past you haven't been successful in your weight loss, but that you learn something from every attempt and you need him to support your positive efforts to continue. His comment seems to have been said in the heat of the moment, in which you were both angry. Keep that in mind. How he responds to your conversation after you've both calmed down would give you a much more realistic view of how he really feels.

That being said, go out there and prove him wrong! But don't do it for him, do it for you. Like other posters have said, make small changes. Do little things that are healthier and don't worry about changing your entire lifestyle overnight. It's easier to stick with in the long haul and you're less likely to give up. Good luck!