emotional eating
swimmommy12
Posts: 13
I just thought I would take a moment to introduce myself. I am new to My fitness Pal, but not to the weight loss struggle. I am an emotional eater, who would love to quit. I start new everyday, but it seems more days than not, something comes up and i crave/eat something bad.
I would love to hear from others out there who are open enough to talk about their issues, and maybe how they were able to finally make a change.
I am desperately looking for ways to not let my emotions take over.
I would love to hear from others out there who are open enough to talk about their issues, and maybe how they were able to finally make a change.
I am desperately looking for ways to not let my emotions take over.
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Replies
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Hey,
Most of what I've learned about weight loss I learned watching my partner struggle with alcoholism...... he would use the upsets in his life to justify having that drink at the end of the day, the same way I would eat twix bars to ease the hurt and lonliness in my life.... I might blame it on the girl at work, or my kids being rotten or my house being a mess, but it was really just looking for an excuse to eat.....
Take control of your life....no one is stopping you from having that chocolate bar..... it's yours if you want it, but it's not good for you..... and in the long run it's taking more away from you than the little bit of comfort it's giving you in the moment....the feelings of guilt and shame and helplessness that come with being overweight becomes a vicious circle when we turn to food for comfort..... the same as an alcoholic feels when he sobers up after a night of binge drinking.....we feel worthless and defeated and less capable than all the NORMAL people out there.....
When you feel yourself reaching for that "bottle" stop and ask yourself why you're REALLY feeling like this......instead do a quick 5 minute work out, drink a nice hot cup of tea or go brush your hair in front of the mirror and tell yourself that YOU are beautiful and that YOU are worth this......Give yourself a break and if the rest of the world around you sucks then at least you know that YOU are doing what YOU can to make YOUR life better....
good luck and you CAN do it...... I promise :flowerforyou:0 -
I just thought I would take a moment to introduce myself. I am new to My fitness Pal, but not to the weight loss struggle. I am an emotional eater, who would love to quit. I start new everyday, but it seems more days than not, something comes up and i crave/eat something bad.
I would love to hear from others out there who are open enough to talk about their issues, and maybe how they were able to finally make a change.
I am desperately looking for ways to not let my emotions take over.
Hi
I am an emotional eater too. But I'm also struggling with binge eating and I had an ED some years ago so I don't know if I can give any piece of advice.
I can just say that being honest with yourself and log everything you eat in mfp can be a huge help! I've tried a lot of diets and stuff before and I've noticed that noting everything I eat - even during a binge - helps a lot because 1) it's a pain to write everything before/after eating it and 2) I'm ashamed of myself when I see all I overate written black on write and I hate that feeling. Since I joined mfp in June (I think), I had ups and downs but I'm proud to say I haven't beinged/had a crisis of emotional eating for 2 weeks now and it's a huge progress for me
So my tips: log absolutely everything you eat; drink loads of lemon water (it helps with sugar cravings); when you're sad or upset or something, go for a walk or work out or grab your phone and call your most talkative friend or relative; chew mint gums (they also help with cravings).
Good luck with your weight loss journey! You can do it!) 0 -
I used to be an emotional eater myself - and still fall into my old habits on occasion. I have learned to turn that emotion into something else. Call a friend or family member and vent for a little bit, go to the gym and take your emotions out by running on the treadmill or punching a punching bag, or keep your hands busy with something else like a hobby or something. It is so easy to turn to food when your stressed, angry, sad...and it takes some time to learn not to go grab that bag of chips or candy bar, but when you start to do it you feel so much better about yourself because you resisted that emotional eating and soon it becomes your new habit. I hope this helps!0
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Hey,
Most of what I've learned about weight loss I learned watching my partner struggle with alcoholism...... he would use the upsets in his life to justify having that drink at the end of the day, the same way I would eat twix bars to ease the hurt and lonliness in my life.... I might blame it on the girl at work, or my kids being rotten or my house being a mess, but it was really just looking for an excuse to eat.....
Take control of your life....no one is stopping you from having that chocolate bar..... it's yours if you want it, but it's not good for you..... and in the long run it's taking more away from you than the little bit of comfort it's giving you in the moment....the feelings of guilt and shame and helplessness that come with being overweight becomes a vicious circle when we turn to food for comfort..... the same as an alcoholic feels when he sobers up after a night of binge drinking.....we feel worthless and defeated and less capable than all the NORMAL people out there.....
When you feel yourself reaching for that "bottle" stop and ask yourself why you're REALLY feeling like this......instead do a quick 5 minute work out, drink a nice hot cup of tea or go brush your hair in front of the mirror and tell yourself that YOU are beautiful and that YOU are worth this......Give yourself a break and if the rest of the world around you sucks then at least you know that YOU are doing what YOU can to make YOUR life better....
good luck and you CAN do it...... I promise :flowerforyou:
Wow, this sounds perfect. Thanks!!! And I do the same, so add me as a friend, whoever needs support and gives it 0 -
I never thought I was an emotional eater until I started this journey, 81 lbs later I can tell you without a doubt I'm an emotional eater. I used to eat my insecurities, my anger, my hurt, hell any excuse to shove food in my mouth.
I still struggle, but most days I win the war. Or at least I make a smarter decision for that need to eat. Yesterday was a terrible day for me, I had fantasies about having mcdonalds, or going to my favorite hole in the wall Mexican place, or hell drinking more than my calories would allow.
Instead I let myself have A slice of pizza and a big spinach salad. The pizza fit into the goal, and a spinach salad helped me feel better about the pizza. My big thing when I do fall down and emotional eat? Not to give up cause i screwed up once. That used to be my diet plan. Try hard, screw up, say eff it and don't do it anymore. Now I try hard, sometimes screw up, get back on the damn wagon with no beating myself up.
You can do this, just remember that burger, candy bar, whatever you poison doesn't really make you feel better. Never has, never will.0 -
I just thought I would take a moment to introduce myself. I am new to My fitness Pal, but not to the weight loss struggle. I am an emotional eater, who would love to quit. I start new everyday, but it seems more days than not, something comes up and i crave/eat something bad.
I would love to hear from others out there who are open enough to talk about their issues, and maybe how they were able to finally make a change.
I am desperately looking for ways to not let my emotions take over.
I don't have emotional eating issues and I think that made it easier for me to lose my excess weight, but I have a lot of friends who struggle with the same issue as you. There are some really good books out there and most of my friends say that keeping journal helps, and for some they get professional therapy as well. It's usually something that has nothing to do with food but you are trying to fill a need. One girl I know is having success now after therapy and she actually talks about it on audio podcast that is downloadable for free. I think for some people need to resolve these emotional issues first before trying to diet, or just take the diet slower than others.
I wish you the best.0 -
bump for ideas...thanks0
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Hey,
Most of what I've learned about weight loss I learned watching my partner struggle with alcoholism...... he would use the upsets in his life to justify having that drink at the end of the day, the same way I would eat twix bars to ease the hurt and lonliness in my life.... I might blame it on the girl at work, or my kids being rotten or my house being a mess, but it was really just looking for an excuse to eat.....
Take control of your life....no one is stopping you from having that chocolate bar..... it's yours if you want it, but it's not good for you..... and in the long run it's taking more away from you than the little bit of comfort it's giving you in the moment....the feelings of guilt and shame and helplessness that come with being overweight becomes a vicious circle when we turn to food for comfort..... the same as an alcoholic feels when he sobers up after a night of binge drinking.....we feel worthless and defeated and less capable than all the NORMAL people out there.....
When you feel yourself reaching for that "bottle" stop and ask yourself why you're REALLY feeling like this......instead do a quick 5 minute work out, drink a nice hot cup of tea or go brush your hair in front of the mirror and tell yourself that YOU are beautiful and that YOU are worth this......Give yourself a break and if the rest of the world around you sucks then at least you know that YOU are doing what YOU can to make YOUR life better....
good luck and you CAN do it...... I promise :flowerforyou:
This is exactly what has been helping me...0 -
I'm dealing with this every day. I agree with jazzalea - you can do this. This is very much a disease and it is a control issue. It is currently controlling us.
You have to decide that you are more worth the wait than the weight.
I cannot say that I have conquered this, for I struggle with it daily but I am able to resist the binge more often than not with these steps:
1. Talk OUT LOUD to yourself as you head to the kitchen and start opening those cabinets looking for something to munch on - and we all know it doesn't really matter what it is because NOTHING will satisfy because it is not food we are truly craving. When I say talk I mean tell yourself that you do not need this, that this is NOT what will resolve the issue at hand, whether it is boredom or emotional at that moment. Tell yourself all the reasons you want to be healthier.
2. Write in a journal immediately upon the urge to binge or eat something because of emotions. Write down what you think this food will resolve for you and how you believe it will change what you feel and how you think you will feel afterwards. This may not stop you from eating what you had on your brain but if you do fall victim to the crave (binge), go back and write in the journal exactly what you do feel now. If you don't fall victim this time, go back and read that journal entry and then write yourself a HAPPY, excited note about how proud you are of yourself.
3. Recognize that this is a healing process and that you cannot heal overnight. Try to use your positivity toward being more healthy and your journal as the tools to making it better.
4. If you can financially pull it off, go see a psychologist to help with the underlying issues.
5. Read success stories here on MFP. They help a lot just knowing that so many people have been able to at least "work within" their issues, even if they cannot overcome them totally.
Stay true to you.0 -
I am in the same place and can totally relate. Please add me as a friend.0
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My god, you must be heaven sent for posting what you did. You are an answer to my prayers today. God Bless!!!!0
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I am a closet binger. I wait for the kids to go to school and wait for hubby and kids to go to sleep. I never counted my calories on a big binge. I was upset a few days ago when I ended up about 400 calories more than I wanted but I was able to stop. I worry about putting on a few pounds over the next 3 weeks my Mom is coming in for a visit for three weeks and we do like to go out for lunch together. I don't have a great cell phone just a prepay. So I will have to be careful and eat more vegetables and fruit. Her favorite is Chinese which is my favorite too. So I will eat in moderation but it will be so hard. I already know to pass on the rice but it will be hard to pass on the Egg Rolls and Crab Wonton. Have a good day. Of course add me as a friend. I am 53 female 5foot 7 160 pounds. Two years ago I stopped smoking and decided to take 2 years off to be home with the kids.0
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I found a book that helped not only to put things in perspective but also gives assignments to help discover what drives emotional eating call Shrink Yourself: Break Free From Emotional Eating Forever by Roger Gould.
I have been an emotional eater almost my entire life. After seeing a therapist for the past year or so, the bingeing has subsided tremendously (not entirely, but we're getting there). So, talk therapy may be a good solution. There is also a program called The Emily Program that treats emotional/binge eating. Maybe look into that?
All that said, I think you'll find that while tracking your food on MFP, "cheating" isn't so much cheating as it is fitting foods you love into a generally healthy diet. When you stop feeling like you're working against a program or "bad" food, it's much easier to not fall off the wagon because that wagon will no longer exist. This will become your lifestyle.
I wish you luck!0 -
There are some really good ideas on here that I will try myself. I am horrible about emotional eating hence the recent 3 lb gain over the last few months. I personally feel like food is the one thing in my life I can control when I can't control those around me yet I can't seem to control my urge to stop eating. It's a conundrum that I am trying to work through.
It is so difficult and I was so motivated and then problems started arising and I was super stressed about things, still am, and I'm finding it super hard to get my motivation back. I still want to do this but don't have the energy to do it day in and day out like I was and need. Just got to hang in there and keep trying.0 -
I am an emotional eatter too. Last week was stressful for my family and found myself stuffing food in my mouth to cope. I immediately spit it out and got busy cleaning my house instead. I truly believe food is my addiction and it makes it so hard because you cannot just quit using it. You need food everyday to live. It is so hard!0
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Hi, we share the same problem. Some days I'm super healthy but then if 1 day I'm stressed out or just tired....I eat like a pig! I have to say this happens more often during the weekend. Every monday I'm really disappointed on myself cause I worked out like crazy and ate healthy monday-friday and then ruined it all by sunday evening!
Everybody keep telling me that the solution is focusing on my goal but sometimes I just stop thinking probably....0 -
Wow! I never realized how many people out there struggled daily like myself. In a way, I am glad I am not in this alone.
You all have posted some great ideas, and I think the first thing I'll be doing is buying a journal to write them in. I like the idea of writing down my feelings.
Today is day 2 here on this site and I do hope and pray that seeing exactly what I put in my mouth as I log it on here, will help.
Thank you for the encouraging words
P.S Please add me as a friend, till I figure out how to add you lol0 -
I am also an emotional eater. Make me mad, happy, sad and I eat. Let me get overworked, stressed, tired and I eat. It is a real struggle to stay on track, but I keep trying!0
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i am a "bored" eater. I don't eat when I feel angry or happy or sad, i eat when i'm bored. I figured out that if i have a busy day i will be able to control my appetite, but if i am at home all day studying or just being lazy i will eat junk.
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I am sorry to hear about your struggle, I know how difficult it is. I've been emotionally eating since I was young child, I've struggled in the yoyo cycle since I was about 12. I'll be honest depending on how severe your emotional eating is, its not usually as easy as reading a book or some nice threads on MFP. It took me almost 4 years of therapy and some of those years intensive to break the cycle. My issues stem from multiple roots which mostly include conflict with my parents. My parents came from very abusive backgrounds and though they do their best, those emotional issues they endured still trickle down to my siblings and I. Much of my emotional eating stems from not allowing myself to be angry at my parents and also not allowing myself to define who i am. By working through the resentment, standing up for myself, and allowing myself to begin to define who I am on my own terms and not my parents terms I was able to break the cycle. Most of emotional eating for everyone is rooted in avoidance of resentful feelings. You feel out of control of your own emotions and need an outside source to comfort yourself or you find comfort in destroying yourself. My advice would be the following:
1. Give therapy a try if you havent already and try a psychodynamic therapist.
2. If you cant afford a therapist find an overeaters annonymous group in your area and see if that helps.
3. Read Geneen Roth's books
4. Allow yourself to overeat for now, but when you do ask yourself questions about it. Why are you eating? Are you eating for comfort or to sabotage yourself? Why do you need comfort? Whats bothering you that youre not addressing in life? Are you scared to confront someone? Are you lonely? When you start answering these questions it may help you to start taking actions rather than just looking for be comforted. The one big similarity between overeaters, addicts, etc is that someone sometime in our life made us feel like we were powerless to change a situation and all we had was comforting ourselves in our despair. You have to learn to take your power back.
5. If this is related to self esteem, something that helped me was changing my attitude. Sometimes I felt like a failure like I was truly a worthless human being because I didnt fit into my (insert authority figure) set of criteria for a worthwhile human being. Then I realized that it was just as delusional to think I was worthless as it was to think I was fantastic all the time, you're probably a good person who is considerate of others who has good days and bad days. No one needs to be more or less than that. Dont be so hard on yourself.0 -
Also an amotional eater!! I wish I had the answers to how to get to a manageable point again in my life.
Howver I do not have the answers, I do know for myself I try not to beat myself up for what I had did the day b4 or the hour b4.
Bc when I get on the emotional eating rollar coaster I am usually on there for a while. Its a bad ride!!
Key for me being dont stay there , When I get knocked down I need to get back up and remember this is why there is a new day :-)
I can do better today I say to myself :-) Blessings!!! Glad your here and I am new too.
Today we do not have to eat over emotions. :-)0 -
I eat when Im bored. Its terrible!
MFP really helps keep me in check. Is that cold piece of pizza in the fridge really worth the 400 calories? Am I really hungry in the first place? Nah, I can wait for my quinoa and chicken at 7:00
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I was an emotional eater, and worse a binge eater. I had/have cravings that I couldn't control. I've lost 60+ plus lbs 3 different times, on a yo-yo over the past decade.
This time I"m loggin all my food on MFP. I used to do this with a journal/paper, calculator, but was very inconsistent. I think it really helps, to log the good and bad. You can't really lie to yourself, so you can really keep yourself accountable. You feel an accomplishment when you've hit your goal for the day, and feel that little sting when you have to write down that binge. It helps keep me on track.
I've also found that by following [as close as I can] a lifestyle I've found from a Dr. Fuhrman is helping me quash those addictive cravings I was getting from cokes, processed foods, pastas, sweets, etc. His book is "Eat to Live". I really think it refocuses us on what we were designed to eat, instead of all the man made processed and synthetic foods we've been conditioned to eat.
I'm only a couple weeks in to it, and along with exercise am down 13lbs. I don't get the crazy sugar cravings I used to, either. It's not about rescricting calories, just about learing what real healthy eating means.0 -
I too am an emotional and bored eater... Depression is probably my biggest challenge when it comes to diet and exercise. I would love to have some supportive friends on MFP if anyone feels like adding me.0
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i am a "bored" eater. I don't eat when I feel angry or happy or sad, i eat when i'm bored. I figured out that if i have a busy day i will be able to control my appetite, but if i am at home all day studying or just being lazy i will eat junk.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ THIS^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ (good post)
I've found that in order not to eat I need to keep busy somehow. Either going for a walk, playing with our dogs, cleaning, etc really helps. You can also take up a consuming hobby with goals in mind to focus on. Like knitting a christmas sweater for your daughter? Or a quilt for someone?0 -
Hi,
It so helpful for me to have a weight loss buddy and be committed to a weekly weigh in. I always need to be accountable to someone it seems. I tend to eat more out of boredom so for me to keep busy is the key. And my motto...remember that nothing tastes as good as feeling thin feels! Keep going!!!!0 -
I am a closet binger. I wait for the kids to go to school and wait for hubby and kids to go to sleep. I never counted my calories on a big binge. I was upset a few days ago when I ended up about 400 calories more than I wanted but I was able to stop. I worry about putting on a few pounds over the next 3 weeks my Mom is coming in for a visit for three weeks and we do like to go out for lunch together. I don't have a great cell phone just a prepay. So I will have to be careful and eat more vegetables and fruit. Her favorite is Chinese which is my favorite too. So I will eat in moderation but it will be so hard. I already know to pass on the rice but it will be hard to pass on the Egg Rolls and Crab Wonton. Have a good day. Of course add me as a friend. I am 53 female 5foot 7 160 pounds. Two years ago I stopped smoking and decided to take 2 years off to be home with the kids.
I'm in the same boat. I was a Chinese buffet binger deluxe. If you must go "chinese", ask around if there is a good Mongolian BBQ you can go to. I'm lucky to have one nearby. They have both a soup and grill bar, where you choose your ingredients. I can get a GIGANTIC plate of vegetables, all ones I love anyway, stir fryed without oil, with a little bit of chicken or maybe beef. The way my local shop makes it, it is like Mana from Heaven. I get Brocolli, carrots, sprouts, onions, pineapple, peppers, bamboo, bok choy, etc, etc. The soup side is just about as good, but have to watch the Sodium in the Broth. I am so grateful to have them around, for when I want an asian fix without all the noodles, rice, MSG, fried foods, etc.0 -
You can journal your entries here, exercise, put up notes to remind you on the fridge and you might get somewhere for a long time even, BUT it will all be uneventful in the long run if you just don't make the decision to NOT eat that way because at some point you will be dealing with the same problem because it hasn't been dealt with to begin with. I do understand, I think all of us are emotional eaters to some degree. But for myself I choose to listen to what the Lord says about these things. Everything is fleeting and temporary, and food is a gift that we shouldn't abuse and isn't meant to run our lives. It is a joy, and there are times and even specific contents to enjoy it (by that I mean there are some foods we should NEVER eat because our body wasn't made for them). But when we do repeatedly abuse it, I think often there is a deeper issue at hand. Whether it's serious deep hurts like a divorce, or physical abuse, or low self esteem, or serious illness (all 4 of which I"ve gone through)to simpler things like we just don't have any self control! Society tells us we deserve so much, when really, though we are loved greatly, the thing we deserve most is to obey what God says is good for us. It cleanses the soul and makes decision making in EVERY area of life so much more clear and easy to do. There is something to be said about why so many people can do this multiple times and still come back to the same problem. I hope the best for any of you dealing with emotional eating. Mine is more on the end of when I'm having a good time I like to eat junk! But, I do so in moderation because I learned already what happens when I continue...bad stuff! Not just weight, but the way I feel, the way I sleep, I've seen my family deal with diabetes, cholesterol issues, cancers you name it. When you experience the negatives your goal to gaining wisdom in overcoming this, is to LEARN FROM YOUR CONSEQUENCES, regain self control no matter what the situations and get off the crazy cycle. Be free by having discipline and understanding why you need to attain that goal.0
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I am an emotional eater like yourself, if something happens, or if I am bored or my daughter is ill, she has a cardiac condition I find I reach into the biscuit tin, or for something sweet.
I find I am fatter now than when I started out, and also that the weight is no longer moving, usually I loose a pound in the first day this time its just not happened, I dont have a lots of weight to loose, but would love to fit into my thin wardrobe again.
Claire0 -
This post couldn't have come at a better time!! I've been an emotional eater for close to 20 years of my life and I need to find a way to get it under control. I have just ordered one of the books that was mentioned in this feed, so I'm hoping that will be the first step to a new me. Thanks so much for putting this out there and thanks also to the wonderful replies of how to take control of my life back!!0
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